Season 1, Episode 1: Collateral Damage

Hello everyone, and welcome back if you are joining me again. While I have FINALLY finished the Ready or Not journey, I decided I just wasn’t done with cheesy 90’s teen Canadian shows. Actually correction, we have survived Y2K and we are now in the 2000’s with the series Edgemont. I’m honestly unsure exactly how popular this show was, I know for a fact no one I know watched it, but I thought the same thing of Ready or Not, and learned through this blog that it was popular around the globe, so maybe Edgemont will surprise me too.

So right off the bat I’m going to let you guys know I never finished this show. I think I saw up to season 4 maybe, and that was years ago, so I remember slim to nil. So I’m kind of excited to dive in and explore this show with a fresh pair of eyes. If you wish to follow along, I know for sure it’s on Tubi in Canada, and I believe it’s been uploaded to YouTube as well.

A brief overview of the show as per Wikipedia. Edgemont debuted on CBC on January 4th, 2000. So 24 years ago. Does anyone else feel old as fuck after reading that? It ran for 4 seasons, and was filmed in Vancouver, BC. Unlike Ready or Not, Edgemont explored a lot more risky themes such as teen sexuality, prejudice and teen pregnancy (I don’t remember this plot at all, so it must be later in the show). Oh and apparently the name of the show is a fictional suburb in Vancouver.

So by far the biggest star to come out of this show was Kristin Kreuk, who plays Laurel. If you watched TV in the 2000’s you will definitely remember her from her role in Smallville. She also was in some movies such as Eurotrip (Scotty doesn’t know!).

In addition to Kreuk, we also have Dominic Zamprogna who plays Mark. You guys may remember him as Amanda’s almost date Cam, from Ready or Not. He has a much bigger role on this show. I think he’s also on a soap opera, so there’s that as well. Surprisingly I don’t believe there is any other crossover between the two shows, but I guess Edgemont debuted after Ready or Not was done, as well as filming on the west coast of the country.

To me, this show is like a cornier version of Degrassi in that it has an ensemble cast who each has their own ongoing storylines, but it has that early 2000 cringe to it, and some of the acting is questionable. But you know me, I loves me some Canadian TV content, so I’m excited to review this show in all it’s glory(?) So let’s get on with it!

The episode opens with a guy in a basement screaming for another guy named Travis. A girl comes down the stairs and tells him to pipe down, but the guy tells him that he’s looking for his math textbook and for some reason he thinks Travis might have it. The girl is like yeah that makes sense. You can pretty much tell right off the bat that these three are siblings.

The girl then informs her brother that she spoke with their dad last night, and it sounds like he’s flown the coop as apparently he tells her that everything going on is a good thing and that “they’ll all learn to grow”. Pretty sad excuse for parental separation, even Leonard did better than that with his reasoning. Her brother just scoffs and runs off.

Cut to a new scene, and we are now in a school with two different guy characters. The guy with the hat informs the other guy that he’s thinking about joining the Communist Party. God, I feel like every teenage guy goes through this stage at some point. It’s this, or deciding to read Atlus Shrugged.

He asks his friend what he thinks of his current enlightenment of learning that capitalism is evil, but before said friend can answer (I’ll start using their names once someone says them because I’m NGL, I forget everyone other than Laurel and Mark’s names…lol this is off to a strong start), he is blindsided by a new gal walking down the hallway.

He (Scott), starts to fall all over the place like a goddamn weirdo at the sight of this girl. She of course is not impressed with his public display of creepiness.

So after Scott makes a total ass of himself we jump into the theme song which is pretty damn corny but kinda catchy? Hahaha. It’s no Ready or Not theme, but it’s like an actual song that gives it bonus points. I wonder who sings this song. I will check the credits after, but if anyone knows shout out.

So after that riveting opening number, we’re back in the school, and we see two new girl characters talking to one another. One is telling the other she went to Pike Place market and saw a Mariners game, so clearly she spent the weekend in Seattle, which is pretty close to Vancouver. The guy from the beginning (ok no one has said his name, but it’s Mark so I’m calling him that now), asks how Seattle was to the one girl, while the other one jets off. The girl asks him how his weekend was and Mark says weird because of his family drama. She then asks if he is pissed about Friday night and he says no, and she says she is and walks off. oooOooo in person vaguebooking, how annoying.

Scott comes by from earlier and tells Mark he’s in love. They make some small talk about some assignment that Mark hasn’t done due to his home life being shit and he takes off. The mysterious girl is then seen again walking down the hall by Scott who probably just had an awake wet dream at the sight of her again.

We then go to two new characters, a girl whose gossiping about someone, and a guy talking to different random girl about anime porn. The girl, whose name is Anika, right off starts telling this other chick that the guy, Chris, is a psycho for some reason. I guess the show wants to quickly establish these two hate each other, so I’m sure at some point in the show they’ll end up hooking up. Anyway, I feel like the show is just trying to quickly establish who all the main characters are because….

….We then go to another new character, whose name is Gil (awful), and apparently he’s shocked at the amount of Asians at this school despite the fact that he lives near Vancouver, and decides to openly be a racist and complain to Mark’s sister while she’s at her locker.

But Gil has reasons other than complaining about Chinese people to Kat (pretty sure that’s her name, let’s go with that). He lets her know that Mark has gotten kicked out of social studies for not doing his assignment.

Speaking of assignments, we learn that Gil decided to copy Chris’ essay and now they are both in shit for that. It’s literally a two second scene. I think it’s just establishing that Gil is kind of a piece of shit. He’s definitely a slimeball character from what I remember.

New scene, Anika is in the washroom with another new character whose name I can’t remember. She’s giving Anika the answers to some assignment, so I guess she’s kind of a nerd. Mysterious girl aka Laurel comes in and tries to make small talk. She makes the grave error of saying she’s from “Tor-on-toe” which is a no-no as everyone in Canada outside of Toronto hates Toronto. But the girls continue to be fake nice with her. Also, it’s fairly obvious that this character/actress is not from here, because no one pronounces the TO part of Toronto, it’s more like Turonno.

Later we see Scott and the other guy (whose name is Craig), staring obsessively at Laurel again, who is now sitting at a table with Anika. Scott also has somehow found out within the span of a morning that Laurel lives in a certain condo, so he’s definitely a grade A stalker. Anika talks about how they are both losers, but they hang out with Mark who has potential except for his girlfriend who sucks. Suddenly the girl Anika was with (whose name is Erin) bursts through a door and asks them if they heard what happened with Mark.

We then see Anika and Erin going around telling all the other characters (Mark’s girlfriend Jen and her friend Grace) that Mark basically assaulted the vice principal. Erin is shown talking to Craig about it, and I should probably point out now that Erin and Craig are siblings as well.

Later at a coffee shop (which is one of the places these characters hang out at often), Scott and Craig are asking Mark if he brutally beat up the vice principal and Mark tells them of course not. The vice principal was giving him a speech and he turned to leave, and the VP grabbed him and they both fell. Damn must’ve been a tight ass grip, maybe Mark should be the one pressing charges. But for some reason, this leads to Mark getting expelled from school. Seems a little drastic if you ask me.

Actually apparently he’s only suspended for two weeks, which seems a bit more reasonable then expulsion, but also still dramatic as the reason is him not doing some stupid assignment. Jen is losing her shit, but Kat tells them the reason Mark wasn’t able to focus on the assignment was because their parents were in the process of splitting up over the weekend. Anika tries to get nosy and learn the details, but they all tell her to fuck off, because Anika is the Carla of this show, and no one really likes her.

Later on, we see Mark at his locker cleaning out his stuff for his suspension. Jen comes running over all giddy because she thinks she’s solved all the issues, by telling the VP about Mark’s family issues. Mark however is not impressed, and tells Jen to back off, as he’s allowed to mess up his life on HIS terms.

The scenes flip so quickly between the characters on this show….was Degrassi like this? Anyway, we go back to Scott, who is clearly having another daydream, because in it he’s talking to Laurel about all the things he’s done when he went to Toronto, like see the Blue Jays and Raptors play. Laurel is very turned on by this for some reason, and goes in for a smooch which shakes Scott out of it. This kid needs to go home and download some porn on his 56k connection.

P.S. How great would’ve it been if Laurel had been played by Laura Bertram and Amanda was the exotic new Toronto exchange student? Would’ve been a great crossover haha. But I do like Kristin Kreuk in this role.

Anyway, back in the real world, Laurel is at one of those Coke vending machines that were in every high school in the aughts, and asks Erin how she likes living in Edgemont. Erin says it’s the same old, and Laurel says she misses Tor-on-toe, but mainly because her friends and family are there, but also kind of disses Edgemont, since apparently the only thing in this suburb is condos and malls. How far is it from Vancouver? It’s not like they are far from a major city if it’s a suburb. But anyway, she leaves and Anika gets all bitchy, so you can tell these gals about to turn on Laurel soon. Should’ve kept your Torontonian heritage a secret, Laurel. I do however think it’s hilarious that Anika actually pronounces the city the way a person from Toronto would say it. I looked up where the actress, Vanessa King is from, but she’s a BC native, so I’m impressed.

Yet another new scene, at the coffee shop, Craig is annoying this girl that works there by telling her his communist aspirations. I forget her name, but he has a major crush on her and bothers her a lot. Her boyfriend, who happens to be Jen’s older brother comes and and they kiss it up and Craig has to sit there and watch it and internalize his incel feelings. Actually Craig isn’t bad looking, kinda cute, but so far his character’s development has literally been I like communism, so let’s hope he expands beyond that.

Anyway, back to Mark and Jen. He visits her garage, where she’s doing homework inside some car. Then she starts yelling at him for not telling her about his parents breaking up. Ummm what? How are YOU the one getting mad? It’s up to him when he wants to tell anyone something like that. Plus you went and told the vice principal, which he didn’t like. I dunno, so far this chick is pretty annoying, like she’s somehow entitled to Mark’s information. I don’t remember disliking Jen, but she’s not making a great first impression. They make up quickly though and start making out. Oh and it’s implied the reason Jen was pissed earlier in the episode about Friday night was because Mark was trying to make her do the deed and she wasn’t ready. Ah such a classic trope on teen shows.

At Anika’s, she’s trying on some clothes, which includes a strapless shirt. It’s really nothing too scandalous, but when she leaves the room, Erin makes it a point to say she looks like a hooker. She then gets Laurel to try on one of Anika’s other shirts, and Laurel makes the mistake of saying she looks like a hooker right when Anika is back in the doorway. So yeah, definitely some drama is brewing between these girls. Also I think Erin is like the girl Gil, she loves to cause drama, and it’s pretty entertaining so I’m glad she’s here.

A short scene shows Chris and Gil, with Gil saying he was able to get them out of getting in trouble for the essay fiasco with the teacher agreeing they each write 2500 word new essays. Chris is like fuck that, you copied me so you are writing both. Gil says there’s no way he can write two papers in one night. Oh Gil…….. wait until University my friend. Chris is like tough shit and walks off.

Back to Mark and Jen, still making out in the car. Jen’s brother Derek comes in with Maggie (girl from the cafe) and basically kicks them out so they can bang in the car lol.

Back at Anika’s, Laurel has left but she’s fuming to Erin about the hooker comment. Erin, stroking the flame says that she can’t believe Laurel would say that and that Anika looks sexy and smart. Hahahha this little bitch, love her. Anyway, Anika has now vowed to be Laurel’s mortal enemy.

Speaking of Laurel, she’s now at the coffee shop, where Scott and Craig are. Scott spots her from his desktop computer and of of course starts acting stupid. Craig tells him to just go talk to her. So he does, and you can tell by Laurel’s face she wants him to immediately go away.

But Scott is delusional and thinks it went well, so yay for him.

Finally the last scene, Kat is talking on the phone to her mom, and is about to say something but decides not to. Mark comes home and Kat starts freaking out because Travis (remember him from way at the beginning?) their little brother is missing. The episode ends with both of them looking at each other in dismay as they now have to handle this new family crisis.

Thoughts so far? I hate the pacing of this show. I’m hoping it’s because it’s the first episode and maybe the creators felt they had to jam in every single character/conflict all at once, but it was way too much. I can’t remember if it becomes like Degrassi and they focus more on specific characters per episode, but I really hope so, because this back and forth was a LOT. Some characters felt like an afterthought and really had one dimensional personalities so far. The show definitely has potential to be entertaining in the Canadian teen drama sort of way, but so far it’s felt overwhelming and annoying.

So I’m assuming next episode will focus on Travis, yet another character…sigh. Maybe Anika vs. Laurel? Scott continuing to be a creeper? We’ll see. I hope you enjoyed this first review, and looking forward to tackling Edgemont with y’all. Until next time!

Ready or Not: Where Are They Now? 2024 Addition

Happy New Year! While I have finished reviewing the show, I have spent a bit too much time imaging how the Ready or Not reboot would go should we ever get it. So I decided it would be kind of fun to do a little write up of where I think our favourite girls would be in the year of 2024. Please note these are all my original ideas. I’ve heard nothing about the reboot, I don’t talk to Laura Bertram or Lani Billard (sadly), so if the creators of the show like my ideas, feel free to contact me maybe we can work together. 😉

Amanda Zimm

Last we saw Amanda she was en route to “the west coast” aka Vancouver. As Amanda was likely turning 15 in 1997, so she’d be around 40-41 in 2024. Once Amanda, Stephen and Phyllis moved to Vancouver, Amanda would’ve tried to continue on with her acting, though she would struggle as the adjustment to moving across the country and losing her best friend would take a huge toll on her confidence. Amanda would enter high school kind of reverting back to her old insecure self, but would manage to find a couple good friends to survive her high school years.

She would slowly get back into acting in University, where she’d enrol at UBC in a double major of Drama and English. Upon graduation, Amanda would then decide to see if she really had the chops to make it in Hollywood, and would move down to California to begin auditions. Ultimately, she’d land a couple small parts in sitcoms, but never really break into the industry. After a couple years of auditions, precarious work and shitty roommates, Amanda would grow tired of the business and move back to Vancouver.

Amanda would then decide to go for her Masters in Creative Writing, as she still held her love of writing/working in the creative arts. There she would meet a special guy (I don’t have a name for him…I dunno, let’s call him Nick), and would begin the first serious relationship of her life (she dated before, but was always too busy to have anything serious). Amanda would ultimately end up getting pregnant with Nick’s baby which would lead the two to hastily get married. Unfortunately the stress of their jobs (mainly freelance writing), a new baby and marriage would wind up being too much for the couple and they’d divorce shortly after her daughter’s first birthday.

Flash forward to now. Amanda is still writing freelance and works a side hustle in a little bakery in Vancouver. She gets word that her dad, Leonard, is not doing well in Toronto, as he has been diagnosed with cancer. Amanda decides it’s time to go back and spend more time with her dad, and give her daughter the opportunity to get to know her grandpa while she can. Amanda moves back to the city and discovers that Lucy, Busy’s mother, has reached out to her via email asking how things are. This gets Amanda thinking about Busy, and how they haven’t really spoken in years (they lost touch shortly after high school). Amanda would then reach out to Busy via email/text and the show would go from there.

Within the reboot, I would have Amanda reach out to Busy and slowly rebuild and navigate her old friendship with Busy now that they are in their 40’s and totally different people. Amanda would also rekindle her romance with Frankie, whose been a widower for a couple years. Frankie would also have a daughter around Amanda’s age, who would befriend Amanda’s daughter (the new Zimm/Ramone friendship for 2024).

Ultimately I’d love to see Amanda and Frankie end up together (but not without some drama, like Amanda’s former husband for some reason coming back to try and win her over), and have Amanda and Frankie’s daughter’s be the new Busy and Amanda for this generation (maybe Amanda’s daughter would be more of a tom boy and Frankie’s a girly girl just for a switcheroo).

Busy Ramone

Once Amanda recovers and leaves for Vancouver, Busy falls into a pretty deep depression having lost her best friend of most of her life. She does decide to go to Riley, but borderline flunks out of grade ten because of how hard she takes the loss of Amanda. Busy decides that the school isn’t for her in the end, and ends up enrolling into Central in grade eleven, which is the same school Sag and Monkey Ears end up going to, so Busy rekindles her friendships with them. Busy spends most of her high school years hanging out with the guys, while still leaning into writing music, and even begins to take a couple college courses to advance her skills. Busy ends up enrolling in Music Composition at a college in Toronto (she was over academia, and not interested in going to University). Despite being within the same city, Busy decides it’s time to move out of her parents place and gets a small bachelor pad in the Village area of Toronto. It’s while living here and going out with her friends to local gay and lesbian bars, that Busy finally has the courage to come out as lesbian. She quickly meets her girlfriend one day while at a pub in the Village who she ends up dating up until the reboot point.

Busy’s family easily accepts her for who she is, especially Sam who has come a long way from his intolerant behaviour before. Busy moves to a nicer one bedroom with her girlfriend in the Queen West area and begins to write songs for local Toronto bands. As the work is pretty precarious, Busy works in a catering business as well to pay the bills. Ultimately she is quite happy with the life she has established for herself in the city. She has even stayed friends with Sag, who still makes his weirdo music and Busy sometimes will still jam with him once in awhile.

When Lucy tells Busy of Leonard’s cancer (Busy’s mom works at the hospital where Leonard was admitted), Busy feels weird about the whole thing, as she hasn’t spoken to Amanda in ages. Before Busy can decide how she’d like to handle the situation, Amanda reaches out via email, and Busy has to come to terms with seeing her old friend after years and years of not speaking.

In the end, while things can never be how they once were, Amanda does decide to move back to Toronto (I don’t know if I would have Leonard live or die). Amanda and Busy would become part of each other’s lives again, but be dealing with more adult issues (I guess maybe like parental death, Amanda dating Frankie, Busy’s girlfriend would propose to her and Busy feeling odd about that, perimenopause, dealing with raising kids etc. etc.).

The rest of them

Phyllis and Stephen: Newly retired, currently taking a cruise around the world, which gives Amanda another reason to leave Vancouver for at least a little while.

Leonard: Leonard continued working and unfortunately neglected his health, which lead him to ignore pains in his body. His long term girlfriend finally convinces him to go to a doctor, which results in a grim cancer diagnosis. I don’t know if I’d have Leonard die or not, maybe in season 2 of the reboot or season 1 finale.

Phoebe: Moved to New York City as soon as she turned 18 and now has small roles in off off off Broadway productions. Currently in a polyamorous relationship with another actor and a barista.

Gregory: Ummm no idea. I feel like he’d be divorced though. Moved to Stratford, Ontario to build sets for the Stratford Festival.

Sam Ramone: Has semi-retired, but still works part-time at the butcher shop. Joined a pickle ball league with other Italian men his age and has finally formed his own little friend group. He likes to hang around Italian cafes on the Danforth on his day off shooting the shit with his buddies. Much more laid back now that all his kids are out of the house.

Lucy Ramone: Still works full-time at the hospital as the manager of health administration. She is the one that finds out about Leonard’s condition and relays the info to Busy. She’s very happy in her career and loves putting in the work after being a housewife for years.

Manny: Is now the head of the butcher shop and in Sam’s role. He works full-time, but not as much as Sam, as he finally convinced his dad they need to hire outside help so he doesn’t live there (well Sheila basically threatened to leave him if he didn’t). He now lives in Woodbridge, Ontario and he and Sheila have three kids, two boys and a girl (she’s the youngest). Sheila works part time at a bookstore, but mostly enjoys her role as a mom. Manny still brings his laundry over to Lucy’s despite nearing mid 50’s now.

Dom: Dom ended up dropping out of school, and he did end up getting himself in trouble with drugs. While he never became a full on addict, it was serious enough that Sam and Lucy had to get involved. Dom admitted himself into a rehab program for 90 days and has been clean ever since. He felt extremely lost in his life, and therefore turned to drugs to calm his anxiety. After he got clean, Dom decided to pack up his bag and travel the world. He is currently living in New Zealand, where he is doing work on an organic farm for free room and board. He moves around constantly and finds jobs to pay to continue to travel. Every year he always finds a way to make it back home to Canada for a visit (his parents often cover the flight). Dom is very fulfilled in his newfound freedom.

Frankie: Frankie ended up meeting his wife while in his first year of law school (he went to Ottawa to study law). While in the program they married and she quickly became pregnant with their daughter. Unfortunately shortly after giving birth, his wife passed away due to an undetected heart condition. Frankie, distraught, moved back in with Sam and Lucy who helped him raise his infant daughter while he got his career going. Now a successful immigration lawyer, Frankie moved his daughter and himself to a small townhouse nearby his parents. Since his wife’s death Frankie has not thought of dating anyone at all. But now that Amanda is back, could a romance be born again?

Monkey Ears: After high school Monkey Ears decided to head to Chicago to try his hand at the Second City comedy company. There he met a girl who reminded him a lot of Carla and of course they hit it off immediately. Monkey Ears ended up moving to the USA, and is still living with said girl while trying to make it in comedy.

Sag: When Sag finished high school he felt even more lost than he did in the episode about choosing which high school to go to. He decides to go to a medium to get his tarot cards read to figure out what he wants to do with his life. He hits it off with the medium who is 20 years his senior, and Sag decides to work at her magic shop while dating her. They have a tumultuous relationship (which Sag bitches to Busy about constantly), until finally after years of dating, Sag ghosts her one day and leaves. He decides to hitch hike across the country, gets scammed along the way and Busy lends him bus money to come back to Toronto. He currently resides in a bachelor pad, and was finally able to get a part-time job at Zap Records.

Well there you have it. My version of how I’d write the reboot. It’s probably mental, but hell I’d watch it. So hit me up Alyse Rosenberg if you are interested in any of my ideas!

Let me know if you guys agree with my predictions or what you think would’ve happened to our beloved Ready or Not family.

I am hoping to have the first review of Edgemont up in a couple of weeks as well, so stay tuned for that!

Season 5, Episode 13: Hello, Goodbye

Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and any other greeting to any holidays you may be celebrating or have celebrated! Or, if you don’t celebrate, hello, and I hope you are having a good end of the year. I am currently writing this on Xmas Eve, but it likely won’t be posted until after Christmas, i.e. the weird in-between week of Christmas and New Years. As stated, I wanted to end out 2023 with the completion of this blog. If you can believe it, I started this blog in January of 2015. At the time I was living in Toronto, and since then I’ve moved to another apartment in Toronto, then Cambridge (Ontario), then Guelph, then Prince Edward Island and finally back to Toronto. It feels like a full circle moment. When I started this blog, it was for pure interest of writing about something I loved, which is this show. I wanted to put together two things I really enjoyed to make some funny reviews that maybe my friends would read, while working on writing. I never expected that people from around the world would find, let alone read, this blog. I’ve received so many nice comments from people all over and people who have been reading for years. I’ve gotten to do a podcast with Amy and Britt from Still Not Ready, which was so fun, and I feel like I’ve improved my writing. So from the bottom of my heart, I want to thank anyone who read the blog, liked it, had a few laughs and joined me throughout these years of reviewing this amazing show from our past. And now, let’s get on with the final episode.

The episode opens with Busy saying that she’s decided to go to Andover instead of Riley (this is in reference to episode 7 of the season, Get a Life). Amanda says she worked really hard to get in and why would she do that, with Busy saying that she basically just had to prove to herself that she could do it. Busy says she can write music outside of school, and it’s most important that they stay together. Some real co-dependency issues on display here. We also see a shot of various Polaroids and pictures of the girls and other cast members (Monkey Ears) from when they were younger, so I guess they decided to reminisce on the past today. It’s very blurry, but I can see one of the pictures is of Busy when she went on her cringe bowling date with Troy.

Amanda’s acting a bit weird about it, and is saying that she doesn’t understand why Busy would give up a great opportunity “for her career”. Again, am I just a major slacker? Cuz I had no effing clue what I wanted to do as a career in grade nine, let alone how which high school I was at would impact that. Busy is still pretty whatever about it, and is wondering why Amanda isn’t excited they will be at the same high school together tackling major issues teens face on these types of shows. Busy looks at a picture of Amanda and her from back in the day, and Amanda’s tight are like at her knees. They start talking about how they were by some bush they used to play in, because apparently their school didn’t have playground equipment, so children had to play in shrubbery. Basically it was their secret cave/fort/other shit. I also love that Busy essentially still dresses the same.

As they are remembering their past, Amanda begins to say something, but then stops herself. Busy is like ugh fuck off with that (I hate it too, just say it), but Amanda bails and decides they need to head out to some party. Apparently they are going to a warehouse party, and “everyone is going to be there” aka Amanda’s reason to go. Other than one person, no one we know is there i.e. Monkey Ears, Sag etc. so not sure who she means. It is also “the last big party before school starts”, which I find weird as they are both dressed in fall/spring clothing. If it was late August/early September it would be pretty hot, but whatever, just me being picky and noticing dumb things, we shall carry on.

In a new scene, Amanda and Busy are walking down some industrial-like alley, looking for this party, which apparently only gives the address as “building with rubber chicken on it”. What’s the point of that? That seems so obnoxiously unnecessary. Busy’s complaining about them probably not having real food, which would also be a fear of mine. For some reason Amanda’s voice sounds kind of off in this scene, like she has a cold or something, but yeah, it just didn’t sound like her natural voice to me. So Busy asks what the big news was, and Amanda drops the bomb that they are moving “out west” before school starts. I’m assuming Vancouver, since Stephen has a new job out there, and he’s in a creative field.

Busy is like stop, hold the fuck up, how long were you aware of this? Amanda said it became finalized today with Stephen’s job. She goes on to say that it could be good because she’s beside the ocean and “the new high school is supposed to be great”. Okkk. Still, Busy is pretty upset, and asks what about all the things they had planned to start doing, like doing karate again and staring a birthday party business (man that would’ve been a cool episode to see). Amanda’s very nonchalant about it, and is like “we’ll still stay friends”, but Busy is smart enough to know that’s really unlikely. Also, Amanda could technically have stayed in Toronto if she really wanted to, since Leonard is based there, so it’s pretty obvious she’s ready to get out of dodge at this point.

Busy is obviously very upset by this news, as her eyes are watering and Amanda at least notices this fact about the situation. She decides to give Busy her Bubby’s ring. I’m sorry, but I am against children giving family heirlooms to other kids (see the Troy/Busy break up episode), but I understand the gesture. Busy suggests ditching the party to go back to their old school Cornelius, and finding their secret bush. Amanda says it will take too long and she wanted to go to this party to say goodbye to a bunch of random people who probably barely care about her at all.

Busy says she’s going to bail, as she’s not in the mood for party bs. All of a sudden we see Milan’s shitty car, which indicates he will be at the party. Amanda then decides for some reason she needs to go say goodbye to her very recent ex and that it is a situation where “you have to be mature about it.” Busy flat out says “no you don’t” lol, I’m with Busy, they dated three months. Also, who gives a fuck about Milan? But Amanda is obviously still thinking about him, and begs Busy to go inside with her while she says goodbye. Busy says she’s only going inside to take a shit aka use the washroom, then she’s leaving.

Inside this scummy building, Busy is using the can and Amanda runs off to “see whose here”. Busy comes out of the stall and begins to wash her hands, and suddenly notices that the ring is gone. She begins to search high and low for the missing jewellery.

Suddenly Milan comes into the washroom and starts making out with Tamira from Breaker High (Ready or Not Reviewed! and We Can’t Go Back crossover!). Busy see’s them and is like what the fuck, at the exact same time Amanda comes back. Which you can guess goes about as well as you’d think.

Amanda immediately runs off and decides to leave, but Busy wants to stay because she needs to find this ring. Amanda tells Busy to get her ass into the death box aka elevator because she’s out of here, with Busy not wanting to because she knows she’s fucked if she lost the ring.

Busy tells Amanda the reason she needs to go back up is because she lost the ring. Amanda is super pissed, as she gave Busy the ring like 10 minutes ago and already it’s now lost, as well as being emotional from seeing her ex kissing some skank. Amanda basically whines about how she wanted to kiss Milan goodbye with no hard feelings (even though she dumped him?) and now Busy is pissed because Amanda cares more about dick than their friendship essentially ending.

Suddenly the elevator makes a not pleasant sound and both the girls are like ummm what the hell. The elevator is definitely malfunctioning. Amanda starts pushing every button possible, which probably doesn’t help, as sparks start showing up.

The elevator is hanging on by a literal thread, when we suddenly see the lights go out and Amanda scream as the girls plummet to the bottom of the elevator shaft.

…..And that’s how Busy and Amanda died.

We go to some dream sequence, where we see Busy and Amanda as young children. First of all, the kid they got to portray Busy is pretty perfect. Anyway, Amanda’s crying because she has gum on her shoe. Busy tries to help her out and ends up giving her some shoes to wear.

Well, I lied. Amanda and Busy did not in fact perish. No elevator is going to take our girls out. They wake up badly beaten in the hospital surrounded by their families.

Turns out that little dream was being experienced by both Busy and Amanda at the same time, so that was something. Sam explains that the rescue person showed him how thin the cables were in the elevator. I hope they both sue the asses off the building owner.

Busy asks if she has brain damage and Sam says “before or after the accident” lmaaao. Why’s Sam become so awesome now? He’s definitely had the best character development of everyone on the whole show.

A nurse comes in and basically kicks all the parents out so the girls can rest a bit. Oh and Amanda tells her mom she thinks she lost the ring in the accident, getting Busy off the hook for that mishap.

After they leave, they start talking a bit, with Busy saying snarkily that this will probably delay their moving plans. Amanda says it’s not like she wants to move (sounded like it from their convo before), and Busy’s like yeah you have 0.00001% chance of making up with Milan. Amanda says she’s over that f boy and that unlike Busy, she’s “not afraid of change or meeting new people.” I always found it interesting that they made Amanda become a lot more independent than Busy in the later seasons, as to me it seemed the opposite when they were younger. Busy very easily seemed to get along with most people (the camp episodes come to mind), while Amanda really struggled to fit in. Amanda tells Busy she’s playing it safe by not going to Riley, and Busy say’s the school doesn’t matter, and Amanda doesn’t care about the important things, like their friendship being over.

The nurse comes back to do some blood work, and tells them to STFU as they should not be having “energetic chit chat”. As the blood is being taken, this prompts them each to have a weird dream sequence of what they think life will be like when they aren’t friends anymore. So for some reason, not being friends with Amanda equals Busy being homeless in her dream sequence. It makes absolutely no sense. She pictures Amanda getting married, and she’s begging on the street. Also, why are you begging directly outside your former best friend’s wedding, Busy? Taaaaaacky.

In Amanda’s dream sequence, Busy is super famous and basically ignores her after a show. This one is slightly more realistic (not Busy being famous, that would likely never happen), but a famous person snubbing their former best friend. Either way, they are both super dramatic with their visions of the future.

The nurse leaves, and then Busy gets an itchy back and Amanda hobbles over to scratch it. They then decide to check out the hospital? Why. It looks super painful for them to even move an inch so unsure why they think this is something they should be doing. They pretty much give up right outside their door and start laughing at the whole situation, because at this point what else can you do.

They then start getting emotional, with Amanda saying she is trying to imagine how Busy would be in this situation and that she’d be so tough, while Busy is trying to imagine life without Amanda. They then cry and hug it out, and yes I got a bit misty eyed, as we are saying goodbye to our girls. 😦

Cut to what looks like a few weeks later, as we can see kids are now back in school, and there are some fall leaves on the ground. Busy and Amanda have decided to return back to their old school and find their special shrub they used to play in.

Busy starts to imitate Amanda from when they were younger, and she was crying about the bubblegum on her shoe, when suddenly see that the ring is in view and was attached to Busy’s boot the whole time.

If I was Amanda, I’d be like give me back that ring immediately. But no, Amanda let’s Busy keep the ring. The episode ends with Amanda and Busy walking together discussing how weird the whole situation is.

Well that’s it, that’s the final episode of Ready or Not. Overall, I find it pretty decent upon re-watch. It is definitely one of the more strong episodes of Season 5, which was by far my least favourite season. I do wish they had featured more of the characters of the show somehow in the end. I mean, I guess we did see the parents, but what about Busy’s brothers?? (especially Dom, the removal of Dom in the last season was a sore point for me). You also think maybe Sag or Monkey Ears would’ve stopped by, but I guess maybe they stopped caring about them once school was over.

The ending is left pretty open i.e. for a possible reboot to happen. I have no idea if this is still happening, last I heard any definitive news was back in 2020 when Laura and Lani did an interview with ET Canada I believe. I’m honestly not sure if we will ever see a reboot, but I guess all you can do is hold onto hope that it happens. I mean Full House got one, maybe we’ll get lucky too.

So I want to again thank everyone who ever got any enjoyment out of this blog. I’m honestly so sad to see it end, hence why it took me forever to finish it. It is weird knowing that I won’t be able to review anymore of this show (unless we get our reboot!), but I still would like to keep writing.

Therefore….starting in the new year I will be reviewing the show, Edgemont! If you are unfamiliar with this show, it’s based in the fictional town of Edgemont, and stars some pretty big people like Kristin Kreuk of Smallville fame, and the guy who played Cam on Ready or Not! To be honest, I’ve never fully watched this show, but what I’ve seen it’s pretty corny, and more risque than RoN, so it should be a fun watch. If you are like, no I’m good, than I say goodbye to you now, and thanks for joining me on the Ready or Not journey, but if you wanna stick around, watch along on Tubi! (at least in Canada, unsure other places) while I review this forgotten Canadian 2000’s “gem.”

I will likely write one more Ready or Not entry in which I write about where I think each character would be in 2024, so look out for that in the new year. As mentioned previously, I’ll likely just post the Edgemont episodes here as well, as I’m lazy to make a new website. I will update menu settings though so it will be a bit easier to organize. Also if you are into podcasts that are randomly updated, I’m still very slowly reviewing Breaker High on my We Can’t Go Back podcast, so yeah!

Well everyone, it’s been fun, thanks for hanging out with me while I lovingly make fun of one of the greatest Canadian teen show’s from the 90s. Thank you again!

Season 5, Episode 12: Great Is…Great

Heyoooooooo. How’s it going? Can you guys believe 2023 is almost over? It’s been a wild year for me. I’m going to be honest, I’m going to try and finish this blog before Christmas. So that means next week another review. Key word is TRY. I have another show I plan on reviewing starting in the new year. It’s highly likely I’ll just continue using the Ready or Not Reviewed! WordPress as A. I am stupid and I can’t figure out how I created this website to look how it does (with my sweet header) and B. I don’t care. I write stuff for fun, not to look professional. So yeah, once we bid adieu to Busy and Amanda, if you are so inclined, stay tuned to say hello to some new peeps here. *mysterious music*

Well enough of that, on with the show. The episode opens with Amanda making cookies for her and Milan’s third anniversary. You would think third year possibly? But no, third month. I guess with teens the amount of months matter, unless you were in a long ass relationship in your teens (I was so I didn’t care about this stuff). Apparently their third month anniversary is also on the same day as Phyllis and Stephen’s wedding…so a real event to actually celebrate.

Amanda continues to tell Busy that the day of she will be making aka ordering pizza for dinner with Milan, giving him gifts and watching videos. This show was too PG to consider taking things further. Busy’s like umm what about your family, aren’t they going to ruin your game? Amanda says Phyllis and Stephen will be on their honeymoon, Phoebe will be asleep and Gregory (who I guess now lives with them?) will be at some concert.

Amanda then starts going on about her future wedding plans and being super corny. She even mentions thinking about Milan in her wedding daydream, which is embarrassing, but relatable.

Suddenly the doorbell rings, and it’s Milan with a huge bouquet of flowers for Stephen and Phyllis’ wedding gift. Amanda brings them back totally smitten, and tells Busy that he definitely bought them for her and not Stephen and Phyllis. LOL delulu Amanda strikes again, if they were for her why wouldn’t he say that?

The next morning, Phoebe, Gregory and Amanda are all up in the kitchen. Phoebe wants to do a surprise breakfast in bed, which Gregory and Amanda instantly say no to because it’s too complicated/annoying to put together. Amanda then suggests Waffles aka likely Eggo’s since they require no effort. Phoebe then asks what everyone is doing after the wedding. Amanda says Greg is going to a concert, which he immediately says no to because his friend gave Gregory’s ticket to his girlfriend. This worries Amanda, as now he is going to be around to put a damper on her romantic plans with Milan. As if Gregory would even care, he seems very whatever about Amanda’s life. Phoebe then starts whining that no one stays home and plays with her. Poor kid was born in the wrong generation, if she had an Ipad she would have no need for her older siblings.

Phyllis and Stephen wake up and Phoebe yells at them to stop because they are doing their lame surprise. The adults tell the kids to hurry the fuck up, as they need coffee to function and leave the room. Amanda then puts on her pouty face to try and figure out how to solve her current dilemma.

Later on, Amanda is calling Busy at her job to bug her to try and get tickets to the concert to get Gregory the hell out of the house. Busy tells her she’s a lowly stock clerk, and she has no idea why Amanda thinks she has these mad connections to concert tickets. Busy tells Amanda she should just make different plans, but Amanda keeps whining and asks Busy to see if she can somehow pull them out of her ass and make it happen.

The next day, Stephen and Phyllis are finally getting married. The kids are all waiting around for Phyllis to hurry the hell up, while Stephen paces nervously. She comes out in the most boring wedding attire. I’m not saying that you need to be a crazy bride and go nuts, but her outfit literally looks like something you would wear to the office.

They arrive at City Hall (not sure which city, because it’s not Toronto’s), and they are in a rush on account of Phyllis. Phyllis’ shoe heel ends up snapping off, and Phoebe offers her gum to fix it and it actually works. It’s such a random scene, I’m not sure why they are setting them up to have some stressful wedding day with annoying shit happening. I guess it shows that no matter how low key you try to make it, your wedding will always have something stupid happen on it.

In the chapel, as Phyllis and Stephen are saying their vows to one another, Amanda for some reason has the hiccups and is borderline interrupting the event. Again, not sure why this is a thing, but it is. Phoebe offers to scare Amanda to try to get her to stop, and I had to get a screenshot of her face here, because it is pretty hilarious.

Anyway, the ceremony ends, and Phyllis and Stephen run off to their limo to catch their plane to go on their honeymoon to Florida.

Back at home, Amanda is still bugging Greg to get the hell out of the house. Again, why doesn’t she just tell him she wants an evening alone with Milan? Gregory is not her real brother, I’m sure he wouldn’t give a crap if Milan fingerbanged Amanda.

The doorbell rings and it’s Busy, and somehow she has pulled off some magic, because she has two tickets to that concert Gregory was supposed to go to. Apparently someone won them in a contest and never picked them up. Amanda and Busy tell Gregory, and Amanda then says he should go with Busy. Busy is a pretty awesome wing woman, because it would be super weird to go to a concert with someone you barely know. But yes, Amanda’s little plan is working perfectly. She casually mentions to Gregory once he says he will go that she might invite Milan over, and Gregory is like ok I’m on to your little teenage bs, but again, he really doesn’t care.

Later that night, Amanda allows Phoebe to stay up a bit later to see Milan. Side note, but I’ve grown to really like Phoebe. I thought she was obnoxious at first, but she’s a pretty cute/weird kid. So yeah, Milan comes over, and Phoebe is drawing him a picture of I guess Amanda and his wedding? I’m not sure, but they do talk about that. Milan kind of jokingly grills Phoebe for more details about their future wedding, and Phoebe plays coy. Amanda is like don’t say a word, because you know Amanda has probably told Phoebe every single detail of the event. Finally, Amanda orders pizza and kicks Phoebe out so she can get all cozy with her boyf. Oh and I should mention, there is a generic “oooooooooooo” romantic ballad playing. I missed these made for the show songs, though this one is pretty boring.

Once the pizza arrives, Amanda starts lighting candles and having them drink their pop from wine glasses. Milan says “do you normally go all out like this for pizza?” and Amanda is like “only on special occasions.” Now Milan’s face is like shit I forgot something, and Amanda decides to toast to their long ass three month relationship, which I guess in her eyes means a borderline engagement.

Phoebe comes out and ruins the mood, asking for a slice of pizza. Amanda is pissed, but Milan is like one piece can’t hurt, so you can tell he’s not exactly in the same head space as Amanda right now. After that, a short scene of Phoebe brushing her teeth and asking Amanda weird tooth fairy questions.

Finally Amanda is able to give her anniversary gift to Milan, which were the cookies. He clearly had no idea it was their anniversary and says as such and that he got her nothing. She says it’s fine because he’s thoughtful in other ways, like giving her mom flowers (for a teenage boy, that is pretty thoughtful). She asks what he thought of her when they first met, and he said she was intense and cute (as we have all learned through the years of watching this, that is true). Milan asks what she noticed about him, and she says he was also cute. He’s like yay we’re both superficial. You are teenagers, of course you are.

So yeaaaaaaah. Remember this happy picture, because it’s about to end in 0.000000001 seconds. Amanda then tells Milan she never felt this way about anyone, and drops the L word on him. This scene is big yikes. Also, she’s brave as fuck, cuz I would have NEVER said it first as a teenage girl, so I give her kudos for having the guts to do that. Milan’s face is like…..ohh fucckkkk. He then says that Amanda is…great. God this is a cringe scene to watch! Amanda face cracks, and it’s really painful to see.

Now it’s super awkward between them, because Milan didn’t say it back. So he decides to bail, and thank God, because this scene is becoming too rough to watch.

Later on, Busy and Gregory get home from the concert (obviously Busy was coming back because she thought she’d be hearing about the sordid details of Milan and Amanda’s night), and find Amanda softly weeping in the dark living room.

Amanda runs off to her room and confesses to Busy that she told Milan she loves him, but that he didn’t feel the same way. Even Busy is like wtf I can’t believe you actually told him that.

Busy decides that popcorn is the remedy for heartache (I figured it would be ice cream, but popcorn is good too). Gregory is like yeah guys don’t show their feelings, that was a lot of pressure blah blah. Not all guys are stoics like you, Greg. Phoebe then wakes up and decides to eat all the food.

The next day, Milan and Amanda meet up in a park to discuss the previous night’s events. Amanda says she’s kind of embarrassed, and Milan says let’s forget about it. But Amanda says she can’t because the words were said and you can’t really take shit like that back. Milan then says he likes how things are with them, and he doesn’t want things to change, but Amanda’s like well that’s off the table since we feel differently about each other. Milan then asks if they are breaking up, and Amanda’s like basically yes. He asks if they can be friends, and she said not at this point, and walks away. It’s very calm for a breakup I’d say.

The episode ends with Amanda putting all her pictures and other Milan paraphernalia into a box. She’s definitely keeping that stuff, I like that sentimentality about Amanda.

Ugh, I hate sounding like a hater, but I didn’t like this episode either! I guess the writer’s felt they had to break up these two since the end is neigh, but I wish they did something more dramatic, like Amanda losing her virginity to Milan. I dunno, I guess this is kind of realistic, but would a teenager dump someone for not saying “I love you” back so early in the relationship. Is that really a deal breaker? I have no idea. I am just disappointed with the outcome of this relationship.

Next episode……well….it’s the big one. The last hurrah, the final countdown. Amanda has learned some big life event news that will change the course of Busy and Amanda’s friendship. In addition, we learn it is unwise to travel is really old, shitty elevators.

Next week (probably), we say goodbye to Amanda, Busy and the rest of the characters of this show. I don’t know if I am ready!!!! But I guess we have no choice, all good things must come to an end. Until next time.

Season 5, Episode 11: All Or Nothing

Hello Ready or Not fanerinos. I am back to continue on towards the end. We are so close you guys, it’s crazzzzzzzy. In terms of my life, shit has also gotten crazzzzzzzzzy. My husband and I are once again moving provinces, but this time back to our home province of Ontario, and more specifically, my hometown of Toronto. Yep, I’ll once again be living among Busy and Amanda (well not really, but I do think Lani still lives in Toronto). I am also starting a new job. It’s just been a LOT of change within a very very short amount of time. I’m both excited and nervous, but ultimately I think it’s the best thing for us. I’m looking forward to being back in Toronto and hopefully living my best life, as this past year has been kind of a hard one.

Anyway, let’s get on with the review! The third last episode is another one I have not seen in ages because I honestly find it rather cringe because it’s one of those Amanda-pretending-to-be-someone-she’s-not to fit in. I really thought she left that persona behind in grade school, but I guess not. Whelp, let’s go.

The episode opens with a bunch of animal rights activists shouting “stop animal torture now” in front of a lab. The leader of this group, some brunette girl, is yelling about how animals are being “burned for science” and other atrocities. Among this group is Amanda, and already I’m wondering how she found these people. We all know Amanda cares for animals as per her iconic Save The Animals song, but I don’t recall her really being an activist.

We see Milan slowly walks up, and his face is very much “what the hell is this.” Amanda runs up to him and is happy he is there, but he’s like “this is your surprise?” Mmm yeah, this definitely is something you should inform people about before you invite them to attend, like what if this was a KKK rally, and Amanda was like “yay you came!” Obviously, not the same, but when it comes to protesting causes, let the person decide if they want to/agree with it, you know? So apparently this girl’s name is Crystal, and Amanda met her…somewhere? (last week she says). Amanda and Crystal had started talking, and I guess Crystal informed Amanda of all the bad things that animals go through and that led to Amanda wanting to get involved.

An employee comes out of the building, and Crystal and the group decide to run over and start harassing him. Milan is clearly not into this at all and asks Amanda if she’s ready to go, but she says she’s part of the protest and has to stay. Milan is like k bye Felicia, I’ll meet you later and leaves. Amanda makes her unimpressed Amanda face and returns to the protest.

Later on, Amanda meets up Milan at the Lakeview. Amanda kinda berates Milan for not staying, because apparently the lab tests on animals for makeup and shampoo. Milan is like, yeah that is shitty, but what about medical advancements such as vaccines. Amanda says that doesn’t mean animals should suffer for human beings, and Milan asks her if animal lives are more important than humans? Amanda gets pissed and asks why he’s attacking her, and he says he’s not, but she doesn’t know the full picture. Amanda say she knows enough, and Milan brings up the group harassing the random employee again. Amanda says tough shit, he works there he is part of the problem, and Milan is like mmm you sound like Crystal the cray. Milan wants to change the subject or go to the movies so they can canoodle in the dark, and Amanda’s like no if we can’t talk about issues I’m over it, and storms off. Sheesh, this episode is already not fun. P.S. Milan kinda has a Jason Priestley aka Brandon vibe in this scene.

The next scene is Busy immediately in Amanda’s room and Amanda is crying. She must’ve called Busy from a pay phone and told her to meet her at her place so she could whine. Amanda’s crying because of the fight, which Busy is like, it’ll be fine, it’s your first fight so of course it feels bad. But Amanda is convinced that because they disagree on such an important issue the relationship is doomed, because according to her, relationships are “two souls coming together” and therefore the couple must agree on everything. Honestly, she sounds like such a teen girl here, it’s extremely cringe but realistic.

Later on, Amanda is eating dinner with Phyllis and Phoebe. Awww I forgot about that weird kid. Amanda’s talking about how she’s given up eating meat, and that she can’t eat “the flesh of a dead animal” which Phyllis gives her a look like don’t say that shit at the dinner table in front of a kid. Phoebe’s like, this is a dead animal? This actually made me think about growing up and did I ever have a moment where I was like “whoa I’m eating an animal” or was it always just a known thing? I feel like the latter, I’m not a vegan or a vegetarian, and I never felt like I had an “a-ha” moment, I guess because I didn’t grow up around non-meat eaters, so it was the norm for me. It was kinda interesting to think about that. Amanda tells Phyllis she’s joined the animal right’s group and Phyllis asks what they do. Amanda says they show videos, hand out flyers and educate people as well as protest. You can tell Phyllis is not happy about the protesting part and the scene ends with Phoebe praying over the chicken, so at least she’s honouring the animal that gave it’s life for her meal.

In the eve, Amanda’s staring at the phone willing it to ring and have Milan apologize for his behaviour. Phoebe has a puppet and asks what she’s doing and Amanda says waiting for the phone to ring. Almost as if on cue the phone rings, but it’s not Milan but rather, Crystal. She’s calling Amanda to come help her the next day with some animal rights stuff and Amanda agrees. It’s a short scene, but I enjoyed the puppet so here’s a screenshot.

The next day Amanda’s doing her classic copying routine, and is now dressing and acting exactly the same as Crystal, while handing out flyers. Sag comes out of nowhere, and Amanda gives him some flyers and tells him animal testing stuff. He’s supportive of her protesting, because it’s a cause, and Sag is all about that (see Africa/Erica moment from a couple episodes ago). Anyway, some dude comes up out of nowhere and picks Crystal up and starts macking on her. Crystal comes up to Amanda and tells her that her and this guy John need to go off to talk about “group issues” i.e. probably have sex in a tree somewhere, and asks Amanda to hold the fort while she gets laid. Amanda’s super excited to have the responsibility and asks if she can do anything else. Crystal says she can call some of her friends to have a meeting, and she would be happy to come talk to them when she’s not banging some random hippy, so Amanda happily agrees and Crystal runs off with her dude.

Milan stops by and apologizes to Amanda about how he acted yesterday, and he seems like he’s taking her a bit more seriously regarding the activism, as he can see she’s out there doing the footwork. Amanda says it’s ok, that he didn’t have all the knowledge of the issue, and that she’s having a meeting later and if he wants he can stop by. Milan says he’ll think about it, which is really all you can ask for when it comes to issues like these.

At Amanda’s, Busy is helping her get ready for the meeting. Amanda freaks out because her couch is leather and she thinks Crystal will have a meltdown. Busy tells her she better get Crystal some smelling salts for when she see’s Amanda’s shoes and Amanda runs off to get rid of them. In her room, Amanda is now sorting through all her clothes and is getting rid of anything made from “dead animal” aka her belts, shoes and a jacket. Busy asks her if she’s still going to come to her house since they are in the “dead animal business” lol. Amanda says she’ll think about it, which kinda offends Busy. Busy tells her to cool her jets, and that shoving her views down other people’s throats is not the way to go about it. Busy’s being open minded to hearing things, and then will make her choice, which again, is totally reasonable. Phyllis comes in and asks what Amanda’s doing and she tells her the same thing about the dead animal shoes. Phyllis and Busy kind of roll their eyes at each other, and she tells Amanda she’s not buying her any new shoes, so wear them dead animals or go barefoot.

While making food for the meeting, Phyllis suggests a cheese tray and Amanda says no because Crystal is a vegan. That doesn’t mean everyone else is a vegan, Amanda. But alas, now Amanda is also a vegan, and you can tell this was when veganism was not really common, as Phyllis is like “a what?” Being a vegan in the 90’s must’ve been really hard. Busy points out that Amanda won’t be able to eat her favourite chocolate chip cookies anymore because of dairy and Amanda’s already regretting her life choices.

So Amanda was expecting 15 people, and it turns out the only people there are Busy and Phoebe (who lives there and thus has no choice). Even Milan ended up bailing.

Later on, Crystal and Amanda are putting away the food, and Crystal talks about how her first meeting had an even worse turn out (one person). Amanda asks her how she deals when things are tough, and Crystal says to stay focused and that the road to changing people’s minds is hard and lonely, but you can meet good people in the cause. Amanda asks if that’s how Crystal met her boyf and she says yes. Amanda’s jealous because Milan isn’t into the activism, and Crystal says don’t be surprised if it doesn’t work out, as she couldn’t be with someone who didn’t hold her beliefs/wasn’t an activist. Which I kinda agree with, I don’t think I could be with someone as hardcore as Crystal, and Amanda realistically probably knows she isn’t as hardcore. I don’t really get why there can’t be a happy medium? Do what you can do, but don’t beat yourself up/break up with someone if they don’t meet your exact ideals. But yeah, Amanda’s doubting her relationship now because Milan isn’t on the same page as her with the animal rights stuff.

The next day Amanda is back on the streets handing out flyers. Milan called her earlier, but Amanda declined the call as she was still obviously pissed at him not going to the meeting. Milan meets her on the street and they have another argument about it, with Milan saying he read the flyer and he doesn’t support the cause, and Amanda being like well you don’t support me and I need to be with someone who does. Milan is kind of just like what the fuck, and walks off.

At Amanda’s, Busy is telling her that she decided to convince her dad to also include tofu dogs at their hot dog stand. See, reasonable compromise, as obviously Busy’s family is not going to give up the butcher business and Busy actually did make an effort to find an alternative for vegans/vegetarians. Phyllis comes in and has gotten Amanda a vegan cook book, and seems pretty supportive of the lifestyle change. I gotta admit, I’m impressed with Phyllis, because I feel in the past she would’ve given Amanda a super hard time about becoming a vegan, remember when she made a big deal about Amanda drinking coffee?

At the Lakeview, Crystal is telling Amanda about how John “liberated” some minks from the lab awhile ago, and now they are going back to do it again. She says that’s what they were talking about before, and asks Amanda if she’s ready for the next step. Amanda says she is, and Crystal says it’s vital that nothing gets out about it. Milan comes up and Crystal says she’ll see Amanda at three and leaves. Milan asks what’s happening then, and Amanda vaguebooks him. He asks again if she thinks she’s taking it too far, and she’s like NOT FAR ENOUGH.

So at the research lab, the group is protesting again, but this time it’s getting a lot more intense. The police show up, and Crystal and her group are now chaining themselves to the lab until the animals are released. The animal rights people being forming a barricade so the po po can’t get to the people chaining themselves to the lab. Amanda starts to freak out and says she can’t do this, and runs off with Milan chasing after her.

Amanda is now sobbing on some animal statue and tells Milan to leave her alone, and that he was right and she wussed out. Milan says he was worried about her, and that she did the right thing for herself and shouldn’t feel embarrassed. He tells her the reason he’s not fully against animal testing is because his sick uncle was saved by drugs tested on animals, and that everything is not black and white, there’s layers to issues like this. He tells her that she can do other things that aren’t as extreme as getting arrested to support a cause.

The episode ends with Milan taking Amanda downtown and showing her some man that saves birds who hit the buildings by taking them to a wildlife rehabilitation place. Milan suggests they help him out, but they seem to walk off somewhere at the end, so they probably never do it. I’m sure Amanda probably gave up veganism the next day as well.

I was not a fan of this episode. I feel like all Canadian shows have to have these extreme animal rights episodes that take things way too far. There’s definitely ways to support causes without going balls deep into things and making it your whole life. If people out there want to do that, that’s fine too, but most of us can try to make small changes in our lives and that is always better than no changes at all. For example, I’m not a vegan, but one year I tried out Veganuary, and I may do it again this upcoming January. I don’t plan to become a vegan, but it’s always cool to support causes in ways that you can and that fit your life. The more you knooooooooooooow.

Two episodes left my friends, two left. Next episode, while it may seem like things are rosy now, it looks like Amanda and Milan’s relationship may be coming to an end. Until next time!

 

Season 5, Episode 10: Second Generation

Hey everyone, how goes it? Can you believe how close we are to the end of this show? I certainly can’t. Things for me are a bit chaotic in my personal life (big life plan changes and blah blah), so I’m always happy to distract myself writing some reviews.

One quick note before I begin. I started a podcast! It’s called We Can’t Go Back: A Canadian Nostalgia Podcast and if you enjoy this blog you might enjoy that. So far I’ve reviewed School’s Out, and I’m hoping to discuss more Canadian nostalgia media from the 90’s/early 00’s, and some other fun things. I’m excited to try something new, but blogging is still one of my pride and joys, and even after RoN is done, I might continue on with another equally, if not more, cringe show. Wait and seeeeee.

Anyway, I’m kinda sad because this is our last Busy-centric episode. The next two are heavily Amanda, and then the last one is both of them. So let’s pay our respects to Busy and get on with the review.

The episode opens in the Financial District of Toronto, so somewhere probably around King and Bay St. We see all the suits walking around, though it’s definitely way less busy then it would be nowadays. It looks like Sam has decided to expand outside of the butcher shop and now has a little hot dog stand for Ramone’s Meat and Deli, and Busy and Frankie will be manning it. Sam’s a bit apprehensive, since it’s a new endeavour he’s taking a gamble on. But Manny is saying don’t worry, the foot traffic from the office buildings and then “the stadium” nearby will be profitable. It’s called The Skydome, Manny. No Torontonian would ever say “the stadium”.

Manny, Busy and Frankie all reassure Sam that everything will work out, and by the end of the summer the hot dogs will be famous on Bay St. Manny “declares them officially open” by shaking what looks like a can of pop and spraying it all over their stand. Good job, Manny. I’m sure Busy and Frankie are going to love being attacked by yellowjackets for the rest of the day, you dumbass.

Manny and Sam take off, while Frankie and Busy clean up the mess. Busy hopes this works out, and Frankie says how it’s basically a win win and they’ll sell hot dogs and make money, but you can tell Busy is a bit worried. Busy’s all aggravated no one is out and about at 9:30am on a weekday in the business district. Frankie reminds her of this and says in a couple hours the workers will be on a “hot dog break” and then lunch will be busy. Busy is like “how do you know?” And Frankie says “market research”. Or how about, common sense? No one is buying a hot dog at 9:30am unless they are hung over maybe, and also likely not until lunch either. First break always = coffee for the office drones (I know cuz I was one of them).

All of a sudden, a truck pulls up with a rival hot dog stand attached behind it. Frankie’s like wtf this is our corner, we have a permit. The cart is called “Carl’s Kwik Lunch” and apparently it’s part of some big franchise, so now Busy is extra worried. Frankie goes over to get the details/attempts to be intimidating, and the guy tells him he has a permit too, just for the north west corner (the Ramones have the north east). Again, are they new to the city? There’s stands all over the place at every corner, no way there would only be one food stand in such a high traffic area.

Also, I think it’s hilarious Frankie is wearing a hat that says “Simple”. Don’t get me wrong, I think Frankie’s gotten a lot hotter, but he seems a bit stupider compared to his earlier renditions, so this seems appropriate.

Busy goes off to call someone and says “yeah he’s legal”,  and makes it sounds like she’s calling ICE or whatever the Canadian equivalent of that is, but no, it’s just Amanda. I guess she wants her to spy on this dude and get some information.

It goes to Amanda and the guy talking, and she’s asking him if he has a secret recipe for the hot dogs or the ingredients, so Busy definitely put her up to this weirdness. The guy is just like…mmm nope just regular hot dogs. Also, why’s she wearing the shortest skirt ever while riding a bike? That just does not seem comfortable nor practical at all. Maybe trying to seduce hot dog guy? Who knows.

Busy meets up with her and gets the details, which with Amanda, is all about the actual guy. He hates sports, plays in band, goes to some other high school etc. Busy’s like what about the goddamn hot dogs, and Amanda tells her they aren’t as good as the Ramone dogs, so Busy is satisfied. We learn his name is Tom DeCarlo and he’s had the corner for the cart for five years, and there’s 23 other carts around the city. Also I have no clue why they look like they are about to do a drug deal in this scene.

Later at home, Sam is unimpressed by the lack of funds the hot dog stand managed to generate, but Busy say’s it’ll likely be a couple days before they get momentum, which is kinda true. I don’t think they should be expecting record profits after a day. Sam is still worried though and says I hope so and leaves. Manny asks what the heck, how is it hard to sell hot dogs? Frankie and Busy tell him about the Carl’s cart and how they can’t compete (probably has lower prices). Frankie tells Manny he should beat the crap out of Tom DeCarlo, and both Manny and Busy are like you are an idiot. Busy says she does have a non-violent idea though.

So Busy’s idea is basically buy one, get one free, while leaning heavily into the “home-made, Italian cooking” marketing, and it’s clearly working as their cart now has tons of people.

Apparently it’s also “Grandmother’s Day” and grandmas get a free dog to give their opinions on the relish recipe Nona made. If I was an old lady, grand kids or not, I’m saying I am a grandma to get a free meal. Busy’s idea is so successful in fact, that it catches the attention of a journalist and she ends up writing a feature on their stand.

Of course this results in them making bank, and now Sam is a lot happier/more confident in his decision to have his offspring run the hot dog stand.

The next day at the stand, Busy and Frankie are all arrogant because now their stand is kicking the Carl’s Kwik Lunch’s ass and Tom DeCarlo looks glum. Frankie leaves the stand to call the store for some supplies, and Tom uses this opportunity to run over and talk to Busy. Tom comes over and concedes to Busy jokingly and Busy brings up he’s not competitive. He’s like how the f did you know that, and then he realizes that Amanda was Busy’s crony and that’s how she learned his info. Tom comes right out and asks Busy if she has a boyfriend. Busy kinda plays coy, but then admits she’s single. They make plans for the weekend, all the while Frankie is giving him stink eye from a pay phone.

Frankie comes back and Tom skidaddles.

The next weekend, Busy and Tom are bike riding in the same suburb I think Busy and Jonah ran in. I guess this is where she takes all her gentleman callers. They talk about Tom’s family life, and how he has a bunch of half siblings thanks to his dad’s multiple marriages, but now he is mostly a single child as he only lives with his mom. He tells Busy she’s lucky to have a big family, which Busy sorta agrees on.

Tom rides with Busy back to her place to drop her off just as Sam is pulling into the house. Busy introduces Tom as Tom Decarlo, and Sam says he used to know a Johnny DeCarlo. Tom says that’s probably his dad, and you can see a darkness overtaking Sam, as he says Johnny is the one who owns a bunch of fancy grocery stores and all the hot dog stands around the city. Tom is pretty uncomfortable and says yes… and Sam says “I see” and walks quietly inside. Tom leaves, and Busy is like what the hell is going on.

Busy goes inside and asks Sam what’s his problem. Sam all dramatically says “You’ll never see that boy again.” What is this, Romeo and Juliet? Well kinda…. Because apparently there’s been ongoing feud between the Ramones and the DeCarlos for some amount of time, which of course has never been mentioned until this moment. Sam walks away and offers no explanation. I do like this picture of Sam though, he looks like he’s contemplating a hit haha.

The next day at the stand, Frankie and Busy are discussing how weird and scary it is that Sam is brooding over this DeCarlo stuff, especially since he normally just rages when he’s angry then gets over it. Even Frankie now seems like he doesn’t mind Tom. Busy is still confused, as it seems like he hates Tom for no reason.

We see some car pull up next to Tom, and his dad gets out and starts laying into him that he’s fucking up because he should be making record sales and it’s pathetic that the Ramone stand is doing better business.

The dad (I guess his name is Johnny so I’ll start using his actual name) comes over and says hi to Busy and congratulates her for kicking his son’s ass in sales. Busy says sorry about that (such a Canadian) and Johnny DeCarlo says never apologize for business, it’s the capitalist way! He gives her his card for some reason, and then Busy says wait a second, maybe it’s not Tom’s fault, maybe your product just sucks compared to ours. She gives him a sample dog, and he’s like I like the cut your jib kid and drives off.

Tom immediately comes over and is like so you met my dad… and Busy is like yeah, why didn’t you tell me you are basically heir to the hot dog fortune and that this isn’t some random summer job for you? But you can tell Tom isn’t into it at all, and doesn’t want to be a part of this business and that his dad is ashamed that he doesn’t. Busy asks if Tom knows why Sam hates his dad, and Tom says it seems like he’s got a lot of people who do. Tom tells Busy he’s not his dad and she says she can tell.

So the next scene, Busy is hanging out with Manny and Frankie in the garage, and Manny is kind of letting Busy in on what he knows regarding the feud. Apparently when they were younger and Johnny’s dad died, Sam took Johnny under his wing and showed him the ways of the butcher world. They were also saving to start a business together, but Johnny stole all the money, including Sam’s share and partnered up with some rich shareholder and started his whole empire. Sheesh no wonder Sam hates him. Manny says that Johnny did eventually pay Sam back, but still. Manny said it was a family legend, until Johnny became rich and Sam never spoke of it again. So maybe only Manny knew since he is about 30 years older than the rest of them.

Later on, Sam is looking over the sales and tells Busy she’s good at the business. Busy brings up the Johnny DeCarlo stuff again, and Sam still won’t talk about it. She says Manny told her and Sam says Manny knows jack shit. Busy says it’s not fair to Tom, as all the stuff went down before he was even born, but Sam gives no fucks and says don’t fraternize with the enemy.

The next day, Johnny DeCarlo shows up again at Busy’s stand and admits their hot dogs are better than his. He mentions that he knew Sam and they go way back. He says he was loaned some money by Sam, and that he wants to talk about a proposition with him. Busy’s like ok you can call him and tell him that. I like how Busy isn’t intimidated. I mean, he’s not being rude, but it’s good she’s not sucking up to him, as I’m sure a lot of people do since he’s super rich.

The next scene, Busy is counting their profits, and I’m sorry but it looks like American money in this scene and I hate when Canadian shows do this bs. Why are you pretending to be American? Please proudly display our Monopoly money.

Sam tells Busy that Johnny DeCarlo called and he wants to have Sam supply his hot dog carts and grocery stores with his sausages. Busy says that would be pretty big for the store. Sam is unsure what to do. Manny says he should, but Busy says she wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t, which makes Sam happy. Busy does go on to say that she’s still going to be friends with Tom, despite Sam’s hatred of the DeCarlo name, and that it’s no one’s fault who their parents are. She says she’d be pissed if someone wouldn’t be her friend because of Sam, and he says has that ever happened? She says no… but I feel like Troy would argue that he probably was kind over it with her friendship after Sam’s former racist behaviour.

The next day, Amanda’s at Busy’s place and they are discussing the whole situation. Tom comes by and tells Busy he’d like to attempt to talk with Sam about their family’s issues. Busy’s says ok, it’s your funeral, and let’s him in.

Tom comes in and is like my mom has a message, she says hi. Apparently Tom’s mom is some woman named Gina, who Sam gets all nostalgic about, so he probably tapped that. Lucy’s also right there in this scene lol. He mentions how his mom was in love with Sam when they were younger which makes Sam even happier lol. Sam ends up inviting Tom for dinner, so I guess he won him over with major flattery, as Tom’s mom obviously hated Johnny and probably wishes she married Sam.

The episode ends with everyone happily eating around the dinner table.

I’m sorry, but I was not a fan of this episode, and I feel bad saying that as like I said, this is the last Busy episode. I am mostly irritated because I feel like this episode had a lot of potential to bring about an ongoing story line and it went nowhere. The one time character episode trope that this is season is so fond of is featured here, but this is one of the worst, because it’s really implied that things might happen with Busy and Tom, and then the Sam getting new business from DeCarlo story line as well. I think it would’ve been really cool to see the Ramone business grow, and then see Busy date Tom, as they seemed like they had the best connection of all the guys Busy has gone out with. It feels like a wasted opportunity. I feel like this last season really had no idea where it was going, and putting an episode like this into the show so late in the season was such a weird decision.

Anyway, next episode. Amanda becomes an animal rights activist and a vegan and it goes about as well as you can expect it to go when Amanda jumps head first into a new lifestyle. Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 9: Graduation

Hi everyone, I hope your summer is treating you well. I’ve been mostly being a bum as it’s been extremely hot here lately, and I’m not a summer person at all. I’m counting the days until my lovely autumn comes back.

I was able to go on the Still Not Ready podcast again, where we reviewed Season 4’s Family Album which was much more fun to review with two other people haha. Go check out their podcast and take a listen, and I thank Britt and Amy again for having me on!

Anyway, I hope you guys all have your c.d. players ready with a copy of Vitamin C’s song Graduation (Friends Forever), because Amanda and Busy are about to graduate grade nine.

So this episode was the first episode I distinctly remember watching from Season 5 after Season 4 aired. I have no idea why, but when the show was doing it’s original airing, I thought Season 4 was the last season, so seeing this episode confused the hell out of me. Unlike all the other four seasons, I did not watch this season in order. That story really had no relevance, but I felt like sharing it. On with the review!

The episode opens with Amanda and Busy shopping at some store, probably Le Chateau. Amanda’s looking at some blue dress and saying Busy should try it on, because Milan prefers her in red. Busy rightfully makes a comment about that stupid remark, i.e. letting a dude dictate what you wear. Busy says she’s not getting a new dress and is going to wear her bride’s maids dress from Sheila and Manny’s wedding. UMMMMMMMM. Now it’s Amanda’s turn to be be like WTF at Busy’s thought process. We all remember what that dress looked like, and it would not look normal at any function other than a wedding, and even that was stretching it. The girl’s are dress shopping for their grade nine graduation, which for some reason is a thing.

Later on, Amanda’s having ice cream and talking to Phyllis about a party after the prom. The phone rings and their small talk is interrupted by Leonard calling.

Amanda picks up the phone, and Leonard asks how she is, and if she got the cash he sent her for a new dress. She said she did, and said she was going to send a note, so yeah, they’re definitely not talking other than through letters. Leonard tells her that he was going to pick her something, but the sales girl kept making faces at his selections, which Amanda coldly replies back she picks her own clothes now. The ice princess mode is still activated for her regarding her dad.  Leonard is obviously trying to get Amanda to open up a bit to him, and talks about how when she was younger she ate some barf inducing ice cream flavour of orange and black licorice mixed with grape, and how Leonard almost heaved because she forced him to try it. Amanda kinda chuckles at the memory, and since her wall kinda came down, she invites him to her graduation on Friday.

The next day at school, Busy and Amanda are walking down the hall, and Busy is surprised that Amanda invited her dad. I just want to say, I really like how this show kept the consistency of having the girls wear the same outfits in numerous episodes. Amanda’s worn that red sweater vest quite a few times now, maybe red has replaced purple as her signature hue (thanks to Milan). Amanda says she hopes her parents don’t make a scene, and Busy is like calm down, they got all that domestic shit out of their systems, they will be fine. Amanda admits she’s missed her dad despite everything.

Monkey Ears pops out of nowhere and Amanda refers to him as “Monkey” even though it was THE LAST EPISODE she told people to call him Michael. Even ME corrects her here and says “Michael.” I guess now that Carla’s in the ground they don’t have to show him respect anymore. So he’s filming a video on everyone’s thoughts on graduation, and the girls clearly aren’t in the mood for it.

Amanda asks him why he can’t just do a speech like a regular class historian. Historian…. does she mean valedictorian? I’ve never heard of a class historian, and what would they even be archiving, unless they have one of those capsules that people will dig up 100 years later. Monkey Ears tells them to say any stupid shit, so Busy says that she has no clue what graduation means because they were literally at Dorsey for a year and she barely got to know anyone. She also mentions how change sucks and why do people enjoy graduation.

Amanda however still hasn’t given her thoughts, and Monkey Ears stops her, while Busy runs away. Amanda pivots the interview, and steals the camcorder from Monkey and asks him how he feels about leaving Dorsey. At first he acts a bit goofy, but then he gets serious and says he is still missing Carla a lot.

The next scene we see Busy and her parents walking towards the school for her graduation. She tells them not to cheer, and Sam says “I guess the Ramone banner is out.” Nice, I’m glad they ended up keeping the banner after their family reunion. A bunch of students, including Busy and Amanda, are lining up for graduation, but no one is wearing a cap and gown. But again, this is for grade nine so I doubt anyone wanted to put any real cost or effort into this ceremony. Amanda’s worried because she still hasn’t seen her dad and thinks he’s not going to show up. Busy tells her to calm down, because he’s obviously showing up. Like imagine if Leonard blew this off after all the bs he’s pulled?

Busy gets called as everyone is lining up in alphabetical order, so Amanda hauls her Zed last name to the end of the line. Just as she’s about to leave, we hear Leonard call her. She still feels awkward around him, but Leonard said he wanted to see her before she graduated. You can tell Leonard is very grateful that Amanda is slowly letting him back into her life. Honestly, the show did a pretty good presentation of this situation and how it might affect the kid. I’m glad they are making Amanda still be hesitant around her dad, but at the same time you can see she would like to forgive him.

So we don’t even get to see any of the grad ceremony, and the scene goes to some room in school, where everyone is celebrating and signing each other’s yearbooks. Sag is sucking out because they got his quote wrong, and it’s a pretty funny mistake.

Apparently it was supposed to say “Africa” not “Erica.” I feel like the yearbook person did that on purpose because they were over it with Sag.

I had to get a screenshot of Busy’s face with Sag ranting, because she’s making some hilarious facial expressions here.

Sag and Busy leave, and Monkey Ears comes up to Amanda and asks if she’s ready to say something to the camera. Just as she’s about to speak, we hear Sag bellowing in the background still about the Erica/Africa thing. Right as Amanda finishes up (we don’t even hear what she says), Ernie Lipnit comes out of nowhere and sprays Monkey Ears with silly string. The whole scene is extremely chaotic.

The next scene, we see Amanda and Busy taking a bunch of pictures with their families. We also hear that Lucy is now doing a Master’s Degree which is pretty awesome. I really love how the show fully continued her education storyline. While taking a picture, Amanda looks to the side and see’s that her dad is ducking out quietly. Way to ruin the shot, Amanda.

Amanda runs up to her dad and asks if he’s leaving. He says he should probably be going. Amanda invites him to a party at their loft later, which Leonard is hesitant to go to, but Amanda says she’d like him there. So it seems slowly but surely, their relationship is improving. I do have to also give Leonard props for respecting and not violating Amanda’s boundaries, he’s really giving her all the space she needs to deal with the situation, which is good.

The next scene we see Amanda at home getting food ready for the party. Stephen comes up to her and gives her a necklace as a grad gift. Now that he’s buttered Amanda up, he breaks out the big guns and asks her if it’s ok if he asks Phyllis to marry him. It’s actually a really nice scene, because Amanda gets really emotional, as she is worried her mom will get hurt again. But ultimately she gives her blessings to Stephen as she knows he’s a good man.

Later on, Phyllis comes into Amanda’s room to talk with her and tells her she’s proud of her. Amanda asks if it was ok she invited her dad to the party, and Phyllis says yes, it makes sense for him to be there. Amanda then asks if Phyllis ever misses him, and she says not really, because she’s got her sugar daddy Stephen now. But no, she says sometimes she misses their old life, but things are different now and she’s happy she got a second chance at love.

Busy’s family soon arrives to the house, and Stephen shows them around the loft, with Sam commenting on how it’s weird there are no walls lol. The loft looks dope though, I can’t even imagine how expensive that shit would be now vs the mid 90’s. Leonard arrives shortly after, and her parents are being cordial to one another, but you can tell Amanda is still uncomfortable with them being together in the same space, and tells Busy they should go get ready.

Amanda and Busy are putting on mascara, and Busy says the most 90’s thing in that, “why’s it good to have thick eyelashes, but not eyebrows?” Oh just wait another twenty five years Busy, and the caterpillar eyebrow trend will be in full force.

Amanda then says to Busy that she has no idea how her parents can just be ok with everything and just get over it all. Busy says maybe people wake up one day and it eventually happens, but Amanda says she’s not sure if she’ll ever be ok with how everything went. I really think Amanda should have ended up going to therapy for this situation, and I don’t mean that in a snarky way. It sounds like she won’t resolve her feelings around this situation anytime soon, and maybe talking to someone would be beneficial for her.

Amanda and Busy come out wearing their prom looks. Amanda’s hair is very reminiscent of the Sassy Sara episode, and I swear to God I saw a dress very similar to her’s back in the day, it looks extremely familiar to me. Busy’s dress is pretty meh IMO, but her hair and make up is cute.

Sam proposes a toast, saying that they are all really proud of them, and you can tell Busy’s graduation means something to him (beyond just a proud parent). Busy then says “Dad it’s not a big deal, any idiot can pass grade nine.” But you can tell by Sam’s expression, that he in fact did not pass grade nine.

Sam goes outside and Busy follows him. She asks if he’s ok, and thanks him for making the toast,  and that she just felt embarrassed by all the attention. Sam say’s there is no reason to be be embarrassed from graduating, but rather from not graduating. He tells Busy he never got to finish school because he had to quit to help his family. Busy tells him he has nothing to be ashamed of, as he has his own business, a family and a grandkid on the way (also owns a house, but I guess back in the 90’s that was considered the norm). Anyway, they hug it out, and this minor issue is quickly resolved.

Milan shortly arrives as Amanda’s date, and then Sag, Monkey Ears and Ernie arrive all to take Busy.  The episode ends with everyone watching the the video tape Monkey Ears made for graduation.

This episode was fine. I can definitely see the parallel’s the show tried to do between graduation and change/moving on, especially in regards to Amanda’s family drama. I did find it a bit odd that nothing about graduation was really featured in this episode though, we saw all the in between moments before the ceremony and the prom. It would’ve been fun to see the characters all at a prom. Why do I feel like Ernie Lipnit would’ve gotten shit faced and then ended up getting arrested.

Next episode, Busy and Frankie decide to open up a hot dog stand and have some competition that may have a sinister link to the Ramone family past. Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 8: Saint Carla

Edit: Third times a charm!! I have attempted posting this twice now, and we are now on attempt number three. I don’t know what is going on with my WordPress, but I’m not impressed.

Hello friends, how are things in the real world? I’ve had a lot going on lately, the most recent thing being travelling for 1.5. months to the UK and Spain, which was honestly amazing. There were some questionable moments, and I did come home with COVID (yaaay, I’m all cleared up now though, thankfully it wasn’t too bad), but I wouldn’t change a thing. Travel is one of the things that makes me the most happy, so it was really nice to finally get to do it after so very long.

Well enough about me, let’s continue on with Season 5, as I have mentioned before, I’m hoping to finally finish this blog this year, but….don’t place bets cuz y’all know how I am.

The episode opens with Amanda performing the role of Juliet in the play for the theatre company with Milan. But she’s only filling in for Carla, as she’s the understudy and Carla was away for some reason. Carla shortly arrives and Viva, the director lady, promptly kicks Amanda off the stage to make way for the real star of the show.

The next day in the cafeteria, Busy, Amanda, Carla and Monkey Ears are all discussing the play. As per usual, Busy is being kind of a bitch to Carla, since they still aren’t the biggest fans of one another. Carla then says she has to leave to go to an eye doctor appointment. Her and Busy exchange a couple more minor insults, and then Carla leaves.

Later on, Busy and Amanda are putting up posters for the play around the school. Amanda is talking about how it annoys her so much that Carla is amazing at everything. To me this is the first we’ve heard of this, I don’t remember Carla being a superstar at anything, but then this show never really fleshed out her character so who knows. Amanda’s hoping that Carla looks like a square in her new glasses, as that will at least give her one thing over Carla. Busy says it’s normal for Amanda to be a bit jealous that Carla got the role of Juliet, since she wanted it. But Amanda says it’s more than that, and that Carla is super talented and hardworking and deserved it.

Also is this that stupid dancing guy from the drinking episode? That purple shirt looks familiar (ignore the YTV logo).

In class, Monkey Ears is in front of the class and doing some sort of lame stand up. The teacher Amanda had a crush on then comes in and asks to speak to Michael privately. Everyone for some reason thinks his ass is in huge trouble for his stand up, even though this teacher seems pretty chill, considering he put up with Amanda’s awkward bs a couple weeks ago.

The teacher whispers something in Monkey Ear’s….ears…and he then runs off. Amanda and Busy think he’s on his way to detention and start giggling. The teacher then comes up to the class with a stone expression on his face. He tells the class he has some terrible news, in that Carla has been in a car accident and she didn’t survive. I’m sorry, but this is a totally inappropriate moment in the show, but I kinda see what Amanda was saying about this teacher, he’s kinda zaddy haha.

Sag, the ever bright boy, then says “Uh…you mean…Carla’s dead?” Yes, “didn’t survive” usually indicates that, doesn’t it? Also did Sag get a blow out this morn? His hair is looking well kept.

Everyone sits around in stunned silence, including the teacher, who then decides to dismiss the class for the day. Amanda remembers Monkey Ears and runs off to find him.

She finds him in the boy’s washroom, where he is in a stall crying. She asks him to come out and they can talk and walk home together, but Monkey Ears needs to be alone in his grief and tells her to go away.

Busy’s waiting for Amanda in the hall with her bag. She asks her how Monkey Ears is and Amanda says obviously he is terrible. Busy’s confused by the events, as Carla was fine prior, and asks Amanda if she thinks it could be a mistake. Amanda says no, and it’s messed because they just saw her at lunch time. Busy’s in disbelief because Carla was the same age as them. She also feels regret for how she spoke to Carla before it happened, with Amanda basically being like, “yeah, you’re a shitty person.”

The next scene is at the theatre company, where the poster for the play has a big “rehearsal cancelled” sign on it. Wouldn’t it just been faster to call people then to have them waste their time coming down, only to see this sign? Oh well, maybe they had it on hand.

Amanda’s sitting around with Viva, whose talking about how it’s not fair that such a promising talent was taken away so soon. I guess untalented people’s deaths are fine then, Viva? The director states her first instinct is to cancel the play, but then there’s a reason that understudies exist in the theatre, even for morbid incidents such as this. She tells Amanda that if she decides to do the role, she’d work every day and night with her to perfect her Juliet. Amanda is still unsure, and Viva tells her to think about it, and that no one will blame her if she decides she can’t do it.

Amanda tells Phyllis about the play situation, which Phyllis says is kinda fucked, because they are putting a lot on Amanda, and I agree. That’s too much pressure for a teenager, Viva should just be the adult and cancel it. Amanda tells her that she knows the part, but she feels like she’s taking away something Carla. On the other hand, she feels like if she doesn’t do it she’ll be letting the rest of the actors down and she’s worried they’ll think she sucks compared to Carla. Phyllis let’s her know that no one would think that, but that Amanda does have to do what feels right for her. I’m glad to see their relationship is much better now, especially when discussing acting stuff.

Later on, Busy drops by and asks Amanda what she’s doing, even though she can clearly see Amanda’s weeping on her bed with a box of Kleenex. Busy then starts spouting off that she didn’t hate Carla, and that if she knew she was going to die, she would’ve treated her completely differently. I don’t think Busy would’ve treated her differently if she knew Carla was going to die, because Busy is not good at being fake when it comes to pretending to like someone she hates. Busy then starts asking weird philosophical questions, like if we all have a predetermined number of years of life, and when you reach your death year you dead. Amanda says she doesn’t think Carla was supposed to die since she was only fourteen. Busy then says what are the odds Carla would be walking the street at the exact time a van with faulty breaks would plow through a traffic sign. Amanda tells her that’s not weird, because freak accidents happen every single day.

Amanda then tells Busy that Viva wants her to take over as Juliet. Busy’s all casual about it and is like, “well yeah, you are the understudy.” Amanda’s like wtf, and feels weird because she doesn’t see it as the right thing to do. Busy tells her that if the roles were reversed and Amanda was the worm food, that Carla would’ve grabbed the role. Amanda’s pretty pissed at that, and says Busy has no idea, and that Carla was super talented/amazing/hardworking and didn’t have to grab anything because she already had it. Busy tells her to calm down, and to stop acting like she’s “Saint Carla.” Amanda gets even more pissed and tells Busy to fucking leave.

The next day while walking to school, Amanda see’s Monkey Ears standing at the spot where Carla was killed. Amanda tells him that they should leave, but he says he’s not going to school today. Amanda tells him that she’ll stay with him then. I wonder if Monkey Ears was planning on doing anything rash (considering this whole Romeo and Juliet theme of the episode), or if he was just trying to process the whole situation by being there.

At school, Busy’s sitting in the cafeteria still feeling weird about the whole situation. Sag comes by and she asks him how he feels and he says mostly depressed. Busy says she feels odd because she’s not reacting like everyone else on account of not liking Carla in the first place. Busy says she hates funeral homes and feels like she shouldn’t have to be made to feel like she has to cry. Sag says some Sagism sentence in that this is all in the cosmos and blah blah. Busy says she doesn’t think it’s fair she died, but Sag says it’s fair cuz if you are born you die. Shut up Sag. Busy says Carla probably thought she still had about eight decades to go before that happened.

So obviously Carla’s death is triggering things in each girl, with Busy looking at her mortality, and Amanda feeling inadequate about her life.

Later Busy see’s Monkey Ears go over to Carla’s locker to clean out her stuff. Busy tries to help out, but Monkey Ears tells her to get her grubby paws off Carla’s things as Busy never liked her anyway. Busy has no rebuttal to that, because it’s true, and walks away.

The next scene is at the funeral home, and we see Carla’s friends and family standing around. Viva comes up to Carla’s parents and tells them that Carla was the most promising talent she had ever seen, which seems to make the parents feel worse. Amanda takes Monkey Ears into another room and they sit down.

She tells Monkey Ears that she’s decided not to do the play, as she can’t fill Carla’s shoes. Monkey Ears gets annoyed and says that Carla would hate if she did that, because she loved that play and worked her ass off to make it good. Monkey Ears tells her that Amanda isn’t doing Carla a favour by not doing it, and if she’s scared she should just admit it.

Back in the main part of the funeral home, Busy has awkwardly entered to pay her respects. Milan comes up to her and says hi, and how shitty this whole situation is.

Back to Amanda and Monkey Ears, Amanda’s saying she’s worried that if she was good she would take away something from Carla’s memory, but if she was bad then the play would be shit. Monkey Ears then takes out Carla’s script, and shows Amanda something Carla wrote in the margin, about how Amanda had reached out to Milan during the rehearsal and Carla thought it was awesome. So with Carla’s words of approval from beyond the grave, Amanda now has the strength to take on the role on Juliet.

Busy and Milan come into the room, with Amanda happy to see Busy came. Busy says she wanted to and she hopes it’s ok. Monkey Ear’s rage has subsided, so he was glad she came too.

The next scene is the play, which is ending. We see a standing ovation from the audience, and then Milan and Amanda take centre stage to speak. Amanda tells the audience that if things had been normal, Carla would have played the role of Juliet, and she would have been the nurse. Milan tells them that Carla died in a car accident. Amanda then says that the play is dedicated in her memory and that they all miss her. Busy finally has some human emotions and starts to cry. Just kidding, I actually wish they hadn’t made Busy cry, because I think her numb response given her relationship with Carla was actually very normal. Maybe she was just crying from how messed up the whole situation was. Also is this the first time we’ve seen Busy cry? I feel like since Amanda is the one crying daily, I have no recollection of Busy crying before.

The last scene, Busy, Amanda, Sag and Milan are all at Amanda’s place discussing the play. The doorbell rings and it’s Monkey Ears with flowers for Amanda. He tells her he’s really glad she decided to do it. Amanda invites him inside, and he accepts, but not before asking her to do him a favour and call him Michael. I guess this is his way of keeping Carla’s memory alive for him, as she always called him by his real name. The episode ends with everyone talking about their memories of the weird things Carla used to do.

Sheesh, what a downer of an episode. I know the episodes are under thirty minutes, but I feel like they wasted no time icing Carla’s character off. I personally am a bit disappointed they chose her as the person to die, as I was starting to like her character a lot more this season, and I really liked her dynamic with Busy and how she was her nemesis. They should’ve killed Ernie or Nina.

Next episode, the girls graduate from grade nine! (Who cares). Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 7: Get A Life

Hello loyal readers, how is the month of February March treating you? I am personally over it with winter by this point, but livng in Canada, I know that I won’t really see spring until possibly mid-April? So I’m just accepting my life.

Edit: So I started this back in February, and it is now March 16h, hopefully this will be up soon, but when I went to go continue this entry it was entirely gone. I freaked out, and luckily kind of got it back from an old revision, but it was missing a decent part of the episode, so I am irate. Stupid WordPress.

Well I can’t believe we are about halfway through this final season. I am really going to try and just plow through this and finish this blog by the end of the year. It’s time to put this horse out to the pasture. I can confidentially say I do not remember much from this episode, so let’ see if it’s a Toot or Boot.

The episode opens with Amanda coming up to a loitering Busy and Sag in the hallway. P.S. Already off topic, but why did I think Sag disappeared after Record store episode? I clearly have a bad memory. Anyway, Amanda asks them if they are going to a guidance counsellor seminar in regards to choosing their high school. Ok, so like maybe this a middle school thing, or my elementary school did not give AF, but we did not have anything like this when I was in school. I went to Catholic school, so it was JK to grade 8, but maybe it’s different in middle school, but most of the kids just went to the expected high school’s in the area. There were a couple exceptions, with the really motivated kids choosing specific schools, and then there was me who didn’t want to go to any school my peers were at and I didn’t want to wear a uniform lol. The point is, this whole thing seems a lot more geared towards picking a University as that has way more relevance then a high school. But I digress.

Busy kind of states what I said in that it’s pointless as she and Amanda want to go to Central Tech and so who cares. Sag is lost and doesn’t know wtf he wants to do, which is VALID as he’s 14 years old. But Amanda insists they at least go check it out for a bit, and drags the unwilling teens off with her to this boring sounding activity.

So they go to the classroom, which has a big “Get A Life” bristol board outside, hence the name of the episode. A guidance counsellor is talking to the students, and really overemphasizing how important is to their entire futures to make sure they pick the right high school, or God knows what will happen to these people. No wonder my generation has anxiety issues. Anyway, Sag asks what the big deal is, as most of them end up automatically going to Central Tech (funnily that is a real high school in Toronto, not sure why they didn’t make up something like they did with Dorsey), to which the guidance counsellor tells them, that is true but there is other options. She names some, and then suggests Riley (not a real school) which is the arts high school. Amanda and Busy both get super excited at that, since they are artistes.

Later on at lunch, the girls are looking over the Riley brochures and getting all excited about the prospects of attending. Amanda points out the drama department has a stage and dressing rooms, and Busy states that they even have a recording studio. I’m sorry, but this has to be a private school, no way is a regular high school having a recording studio. Busy asks Amanda if she’s sure she wants to do this, as the other day she was saying she wanted to be a marine biologist. This a small comment that doesn’t really matter now, but will later. But Amanda says nope, acting is still her number one and she’s in. Busy says the only issue will be convincing her parents, as we all know the Ramone kid’s are expected to eventually take the mental of the butcher shop empire Sam has built.

Later we see Sam and Lucy trying to put together a crib for Manny and Sheila’s imaginary baby. Busy’s annoyed because her parents won’t sign the papers for the art school, citing that “careers are limited in the arts.” Again, unless they are paying tuition, there’s no reason why she can’t just go to a stupid art’s high school. High school has no baring on future work opportunities. But I guess since Sam already has one kid who has ruined his dreams of a successful academic career (Dom), they are putting all their eggs in Busy’s basket. Busy of course is pissed, but Lucy says they aren’t exactly saying no, they just want more information. Anyway, the scene ends with Busy happy and the crib falling apart.

The next scene, Sam Busy, Lucy and Amanda are all touring Riley with a tour guide. We see various arty aspects of the school such as a dance troupe, and a nude sculpture, which Sam is none too impressed by, but Busy reminds him that music students don’t deal with naked people. Sam’s about ready to write everything off, but hears a girl singing opera and he’s pretty enamoured. He seems to be now seriously considering allowing Busy to attend.

The next day at lunch, Sag is probably appropriating a culture, and using an I-Ching (I think that’s what he said it was), trying to figure out his future. Busy tells him to just apply everywhere because then he’ll have to go somewhere. Amanda, Monkey Ears and Carla all show up, and ME tells Amanda he’s surprised she’s going to Riley since she said she wanted to be an Egyptologist before. She said that wasn’t practical, with Monkey Ear’s correctly pointing out that acting isn’t exactly that either. Busy says now that Sam signed her forms all she needs is the guidance counsellor’s endorsement, and that should be easy peasy to get. Or…will it? (said in Keith Morrison voice). Also, gotta point out Carla’s hella 90’s outfit, tank top over t-shirt, love it.

The next scene is one that really pisses me off. So it’s both Amanda and Busy in the guidance counsellor’s office (her name is Ms. Thurmond, I think), but it’s flashing between two separate interviews with her. In Amanda’s interview, everything is going swimmingly, with Ms.Thurmond being under what I like to call “The Amanda Effect”, i.e. people swooning over Amanda because she’s Amanda (see the wort episode from last season). Whereas Busy’s interview is going much differently, with Ms.Thurmond giving Busy a hard time, saying her math grades suck, she doesn’t have enough musical experience etc. Meanwhile not even caring that Amanda had a shitty time like two episodes ago almost failing grade nine when she was skipping school/homework to go do acting. The scene ends with Ms.Thurmond giving Amanda a signed recommendation, but not Busy. What a bitch.

Afterwards Amanda runs up to Busy all excited because she doesn’t know yet that Ms. Thurmond just ruined Busy’s life. Busy kind of plays it off, and doesn’t tell Amanda yet. Amanda runs off somewhere and Busy looks devastated.

Later on at the Ramone’s house, Busy is still super bummed and Lucy is definitely noticing. Manny and Sheila come in with their baby’s ultrasound picture, but they don’t know the sex yet. Is that normal? I thought by then you could know what the kid was going to be. I don’t have kids, so maybe that’s normal. Anyway, Busy leaves the room still upset about the day’s events and Lucy follows her daughter to find out what’s up.

Lucy knocks on Busy’s door and Busy is all mad because her mom didn’t make her keep taking piano lessons as a kid. LOL this is so something I’d blame on my parents as well. Lucy says they gave Busy options for activities and it was up to her if she wanted to keep going. Busy tells her mom because of that she can’t go to Riley. Lucy asks if Amanda got the letter, and Busy’s non-answer gives her mother the answer. Lucy seeing the forest the trees, tells Busy that even if her and Amanda don’t go to the same high school they will still stay friends. Busy’s still bummed though. I think it’s honestly 50/50 in that Busy does want to stick by Amanda’ side, but I think she’s a lot more invested in Riley than Amanda, as Busy has been doing music since the start of this show and Amanda’s been acting for a couple seasons.

The next day Amanda’s chatting with Carla, who tells her she’s decided to go to Andover (no idea if that’s how they spell it) Academy, which is also a made up school. Amanda’s surprised, since Carla is her frenemy/rival with acting, so she was sure she’d also go to Riley, but then Carla says her and her parents decided focusing on academics is more important, since they are 14 and she has no clue what she wants to do. Honestly, that’s a realistic take, but the tour guide said Riley had good academics too, so not sure why they can’t all just go to this stupid school. Busy comes up and is about to tell Amanda she didn’t get in, when Carla kinda pokes her nose into their convo, stating she saw Amanda’s name on the audition list but not Busy’s. Busy then runs off, and Carla does this weird smirk. I really get the impression if things didn’t end up happening later in this season (which I’m pretty sure is next ep), Carla would’ve definitely tried to eventually steal Amanda from Busy.

So Amanda chases Busy into the can, where Busy confesses she didn’t get an audition, thanks to the swamp hag Ms. Thurmond. Amanda’s like wtf, and Busy pretty much reiterates exactly what I said before i.e. Amanda having a rainbow coming out of her ass cuz everything always works out for her, and Busy’s been doing music way longer than Amanda has been acting, but yet Amanda get’s accepted. Amanda’s kinda like….hmm we gotta put our minds together and figure out a solution.

The next scene Busy’s at Amanda’s place and Stephen is trying to create some corny jingle for a chicken commercial. They start talking, and Stephen tells her how before he became a jingle writer, he was an engineer and went to school for that. Busy’s shocked at the idea that Stephen didn’t attend an art’s high school and he has a career as a music writer, and he tells her no musicians he knows went to school for art. Pretty much reiterating that you can do it if you want to. I’d say of all the careers, arts, while the hardest to break into, is the one where you probably need the least amount of formal education. Obviously they all take music/acting/art lessons, but it does seem pretty possible to break into these fields with any background. Busy pushes one key on the keyboard and somehow makes the jingle cooler, I guess showcasing that Busy has natural talent.

Later in the evening, Busy is looking over the booklet for Riley trying to figure out a solution to her issue. Amanda suggests not going to Riley, which Busy responds is a stupid idea, cuz she wouldn’t want to hold Amanda back. But it looks like Busy has possibly found a solution to this whole dilemma.

The next day Busy rushes to Ms. Thurmond’s room to tell her off, well not really, but she does make her thoughts be known, which is why I love Busy. She tells the guidance counsellor that she found something in the booklet that say she can do an audition if she can demonstrate adequate musical abilities, as well as having an endorsement from a professional in the field, so she got a letter from Stephen. Ms. Thurmond doesn’t seem to really care that Busy did all this extra work, and Busy lets her know it was shitty she didn’t help her at all. Finally, she decides to give Busy her signature, since she’d look like an asshole even more if she refused this. I am glad Busy said something, because this lady sucked. She very much failed at her job title, and even seemed like she was actively trying to discourage Busy from even trying. Stupid adults, ruining children’s dreams. At least give them a couple years of thinking life can work out for them!

Elated, Busy runs down the hall to tell Amanda she defeated Ms. Thurmond and got the signature. But now it’s Amanda’s turn to ruin Busy’s day, as she drops the bomb that she’s decided to go to Andover instead of Riley. Busy is rightfully like what the actual fuck, but Amanda says it’s because she’s still not sure what she wants to do in the future. Busy’s pissed though, because you can tell that she’s super upset that her and Amanda won’t be at the same school next year. Busy feels really betrayed by this whole ordeal and walks off. Ok first of all, I wish I could take them both aside and say, One, It doesn’t matter if you don’t go to the same high school as your friends. I didn’t go to the same high school as any of them, and I basically remained friends with a couple of them until one moved away and then the others we naturally just drifted apart with age, but that happens to almost everybody. Two, just go to fucking Riley, Amanda. If there’s one time that you should just do fuck all, it’s in high school. I don’t really get the emphasis on how important this choice is to everyone in this episode. Maybe I went to a super lax elementary school, but all we were told was go to the Catholic school nearest you, and I didn’t even do that, I went to a public school, but never once did anyone ever tell us that our lives depended on this choice.

The next day Sag is sitting in the hallway still being annoying, and Busy asks if he’s finally decided where he wants to go to high school. He gives some stupid answer, and Busy says she’s nervous about her audition. Sag says she’ll be fine. Amanda see’s Busy and wishes her luck. You can tell things are still awkward between them, but I’m glad Busy is still doing the audition.

The episode ends with Busy at her drumming audition and there’s triumphant music in the background as she’s playing, so I’m assuming she got accepted to Riley.

This episode was pretty good. I wonder if the show knew this was the last season by this point, as they could’ve just had them go to different high school’s instead of what happens instead (I won’t spoil the almost 30 year old show, but just in case people are watching it for the first time). Yeah, I dunno, this episode continues to show that Amanda and Busy are different people, but now for the first time it feels like their differences may be pulling them apart instead of keeping them together. It was a weird vibe.

Next episode: Get ready for a tear jerker, as one of the students at Dorsey Jr. High is taken away from us too soon.

Season 5, Episode 6: When A Kiss Is Just A Kiss

Hello everyone, happy 2023! I hope the year has been kind to you so far, and let us never speak of 2022 ever again. Will I finally finish the blog this year? Only time will tell, but I’d honestly really like to, as I want to move on to new things (later towards the end of the life of this blog, I will ask people’s opinions regarding stuff..mmm vagueness).

Anyway, we start the new year with a Busy episode, featuring yet another random who we will never see again! I honestly don’t remember much of this one, so let’s get on with it.

The episode opens in the art class with the teacher Amanda was obsessed with last season. The class is doing portraits, and the teacher asks what’s the most important thing about doing a portrait. Amanda and Sag give random answers, but then Ernie Lipnit says “essence.” In case you need a refresher, Ernie was the one who was leaving office supply drawings in Busy’s locker…also from that same episode with Amanda and the teacher. I guess we’ve come full circle.

Ernie is drawing Sag and Amanda is drawing Busy. Amanda just needs to stop, we remember how the painting of Busy looked from that episode where Amanda lied about getting into the art school program. Amanda tells them Milan says she’s “intriguing” and Busy says she can’t draw that, so perky will have to do, which pisses Amanda off. I think of a tiny dog when I hear perky. She settles on being drawn as “enthusiastic”.

Busy gets up off the desk and accidentally drops Ernie’s stuff, revealing about 18,000 drawings of Busy. She is surprisingly not creeped out by this discovery.

Everyone is like “wooooow”, including the teacher who says that these drawings capture Busy’s essence. Carla is the only one who says what I’m thinking in that this is one step from a shrine/obsession.

Later on, Busy is at her locker, and Sag is talking about how this whole Ernie Lipnit thing is like Cyrano de Bergerac, i.e. that play about the dude with the huge schnoz who likes a girl but can’t talk to her. I’m actually surprised the show didn’t have them putting on this play, as they usually aren’t about the subtle metaphors. Busy is like “mmmmmkay.” Amanda of course thinks this is all romantic (ah, never change, Amanda), and that Busy is Ernie’s muse. Busy actually still has the drawings from last season and pulls them out. Sag basically implies that Ernie is pining for Busy, and she says if he ever tries talking to her maybe something could happen.

The next scene Busy is in the stairwell (why do they all sit around on the stairs in this show?) and Ernie comes by. He apologizes for embarrassing her with the drawings in class, stating that now that he’s mastered office supplies, he’s moved onto humans, or rather a human, as he only seems to draw Busy. He’s super awkward, but honestly a bit endearing, considering the slew of drawings. He struggles to ask Busy if she’s busy (haha) this weekend, implying he wants to ask her out. Busy says she’s only going to watch Frankie in some basketball tournament, but otherwise nothing else is on the docket. Ernie says he loves basketball (and flying and snowboarding randomly), and then goes to leave. Busy asks if he’d like to go to the game with her and he gets super pumped up and says yaaas. Again, all things considering, I get no major fedora vibes from Ernie.

After school we see Busy arrive home and Frankie is playing basketball with the annual random of this season’s episode. His name is Jonah and right away you can tell Busy wanna climb him like a tree. Frankie tells her to get lost, and she steals the basketball from him and makes the shot. Jonah is impressed with Busy and Frankie says it was a lucky fluke. Of course it’s not, as we know Busy is actually a much better basketball player than Frankie (refer to every prior episode involving basketball and these two), and makes it again. Jonah is now getting pretty hard for Busy after that, and so we see that the sparks are flying between these two young adults. Uh oh…

Busy goes inside and calls Amanda, asking her if she knew right away that Milan was “the one”. Amanda says yes cuz he has “dimples that gives her shivers”. Hahaha of course Amanda’s soul mate’s most important features is his dimples. Amanda asks why she’s asking and if it’s about Ernie. Busy’s like who the hell is Ernie? Obviously he’s out of her mind now that she’s gotten a look at that slab of beef called Jonah. Lucy calls Busy to ask her a question about wallpaper, and so she hangs up with Amanda. Busy asks who Jonah is, and Lucy tells her that he’s staying with the Ramones for the weekend for the basketball tournament. Again, no clue who this random is, but he’s well known enough to stay overnight at the Ramone’s place. Whatevs.

At dinner, the Ramone’s are talking about embarrassing moments in their child’s lives in front of Jonah for some reason. They talk about some stuffed animal Frankie had, and then how Busy was basically a child nudist and would only go around wearing mittens when she was a kid. Of course Busy is like what the actual fuck, because she likes Jonah, but he brings up having lucky socks, which I guess is his way of making her feel less lame. He then offers to clear the table, which Lucy of course enjoys because even though her family isn’t as bad as the beginning of this show, sometimes they need reminders to help out.

After dinner, Frankie goes off to get his dad’s car keys, while Jonah sneaks into the kitchen where Busy is intensely scrubbing clean one area of the counter. He tells her that he and Frankie are going to shoot pool, and he asks if she wants to come. Just as she says yes, Frankie comes in and is like da fuk is occuring? Jonah says that he invited Busy to join them, but Frankie is like fuck no. Of course Busy is hella annoyed, she’s digging on Jonah, but there is rhyme to Frankie’s reason behind his harsh actions.

A short scene later and “Ernie Lipstick” as Sam calls him (LMAO), phones Busy about their date tomorrow and asking when he should pick her up. She says she will get a ride with her parents since they are going too, but she can meet him there and they’ll sit away from the parental units.

The next morning Busy wakes up to do her usual Saturday morning run, which is apparently a thing she does. Jonah is awake as well for some reason, and he ends up joining her. They talk again about their childhood’s and how when he was younger his parents leashed him because he was a stupid kid. Anyway, they end up sitting on grass and talking about some more random bullshit, and then finally he kisses her.

Later on, Busy is going through her closet of all similar looking shirts to find something sexy to wear to the basketball game. Amanda comes by, as she wanted to scope out Jonah, but he had already left for the gym. Busy says she has a dilemma, as obvi she’s into Jonah, but Ernie is her actual date to the game, and she’s really just not about the Lipstick life anymore. Amanda tells her she should reschedule, but Busy comes up with a better plan, having Amanda tag along as a third wheel for the game, and then once it’s over, ditching Ernie so she can go chill with Jonah.

At the gym, I guess Amanda and Busy went early, because we see them in the door way spying on the basketball players. Busy points out Jonah, who of course gets Amanda’s seal of approval, because when has she ever not given that when it comes to a guy? Here’s a screenshot of them looking like weirdos spying on him.

Frankie comes up to them and is like what the hell are you doing? Amanda makes an excuse to leave, and Frankie tells Busy Jonah’s out of her league. Busy is like what’s your goddamn problem, and Frankie says he’s looking out for her, and that Busy should be careful. So really, no information given other than Frankie looks weirdly jealous of this whole situation at the moment.

A one second scene later that makes absolutely no sense. Busy comes home and Sam informs her “Ernie Lipstick” has called about 25 times and has left a message to let Busy know he’ll meet her at the game. Ok, so why did Busy go home? Because the next scene they are back at the stupid basketball game. So yeah, I dunno, maybe it was a later point in the day, but it just seemed really random after the previous scene showed them both there, but who actually cares.

So back at the gym, Lucy and Sam run off to find seats for the game, while Busy and Amanda look for Jonah. Busy spots him and tells Amanda to keep an eye out for Ernie. Of course literally two seconds after Busy meets up with Jonah Ernie arrives. Ernie see’s Busy talking with Jonah, but thinks it’s her brother. Unfortunately her real brother Frankie comes up and asks Amanda where his parents are. Ernie is like who da fack is that, and Amanda immediately says Busy’s brother.. Like why, girl? I mean, I guess she could’ve lied and said they were fraternal twins, but then Ernie see’s Busy kiss Jonah…sigh.

So of course we know the girls don’t live in backwater West Virginia, so Ernie quickly realizes this is not a family member of Busy’s. Ernie is immediately over it and bails. Stupid Busy, why would you be so public in your forbidden trysts with Jonah when you knew Ernie was coming? On the other hand, Amanda is a terrible wing woman, why didn’t she usher Ernie into the gym or literally move him ANYWHERE outside of the sight of Jonah and Busy? Terrible planning all around.

In the washroom, Busy acknowledges that she fucked things up with Ernie, but at the same time she really doesn’t seem to care, as she’s hot for Jonah and goes off to look for him.

Busy see’s Jonah in the gym with a bunch of people, including Frankie. She congratulates him on winning the game, but then we hear some random girl voice telling Jonah they’re leaving. Apparently they are going to shoot pool, and I guess now that other women are around, Jonah doesn’t need Busy’s vagine, because he tells her he can’t invite her as it’s “not his call”, even though he literally did that exact thing when it was just him and Frankie a day ago. Busy is crushed, and walks off awkwardly in an empty gym back to her house alone.

Later we see Busy sitting up waiting for Jonah to get home. Damn, girl has it bad, he must have beer flavoured nipples or something (10 Things reference for all you youngins, RIP Heath Ledger). She hears the door, but it’s only Frankie coming back. Apparently Jonah is making it an all-nighter with his new honeys. Busy is confused because she got vibes from Jonah, and Frankie confirms that yes he likes her, but he’s here for a good time, not a long time (meaning only the weekend). Busy gets it though, which is very mature. I guess you still kinda would hope things could happen, even if it’s long distance. Either way, she knows it’s shitty, but she accepts the situation with Jonah.

…Meanwhile there’s still the matter of Ernie. The next day Busy comes up with some fake story about a show about airplanes to talk to Ernie. Ernie see’s through it though and is just like…yeaaah. Busy apologizes for what happened, and then says she understands if Ernie never wants to speak to her again. He’s like “we’re talking now” and then walks away. He seemed pretty decent, so I guess he doesn’t hate her. The episode ends with Amanda coming up out of nowhere and Busy and her walk off talking about jibberish. It’s a very non-ending ending. We have literally no resolution in this Ernie situation, I’m only assuming they just go back to basically ignoring each other as they did before.

This episode was ok, but kind of pointless in my opinion. I don’t really get why this show was trying to set up some weird love triangle between Busy and two extremely random guys. I feel like this would’ve been more entertaining if Amanda had been in this situation. I dunno, I think they should’ve made Busy end up with a boyfriend and Amanda having these wacky single misadventures, it seems like it would have suited them more if the roles had been switched.

Anyway, next episode, a guidance counsellor encourages Amanda to follow her dreams and tells Busy she should just give up and work at McDonald’s for life. Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 5: Let Me Make My Own Mistakes

Hey everyone….it’s been a minute.

Last I posted, I was living in Guelph, Ontario, but in late August my husband and I relocated to the Belfast area of Prince Edward Island. It is about 30 minutes by car to Charlottetown. We went from living in a pretty busy city to rural life, and it’s definitely been an adjustment.

The biggest incident that happened was being struck by Hurricane Fiona. The Atlantic Canada provinces got hit very hard, with PEI being very badly affected. We lost our power for 10 days which was a lot to deal with, and lots of trees down on the property as well as all over the island. To be honest, it’s been a rough couple months with all the changes and then this happening. I finally feel like we are getting established into “normal” life now, which is welcoming after all the chaos.

Anyway, I have missed writing in here, and I am sorry it’s been so long since the last post. I know that’s normal for me, but the other times I was mostly just busy/kinda lazy, but this time it was crazy circumstances I wouldn’t wish on most people.

Well that’s my life update, time to review some Ready or Not. All I know about this episode is Amanda and Phyllis have yet another fight…yay. Here we go.

The episode opens with Amanda’s acting teacher reading off the script to Romeo and Juliet, so I’m assuming her acting company is going to be performing that play. After the teacher dismisses the class, Amanda comes up to her and tells her how romantic she thinks the play is, with the teacher being like uh…everyone dies. But I can only assume Amanda saw the 1996 Romeo and Juliet movie with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes, because I was allll about that movie when I was a teen and would’ve totally thought the play was romantic as well.

We find out Amanda is playing the nurse and Carla is playing Juliet. Carla is like omg how does Juliet have so many lines?? The play has her name in the title, clearly she’s going to be talking a lot, dum dum. The boy with the Italian city for a name, Milan, whispers in Amanda’s ear that she would’ve made a damn fine Juliet, and of course Amanda is smitten.

Amanda gets home and you can already tell Phyllis is not happy with her daughter. It’s Stephen’s birthday, and Amanda missed the dinner and they were waiting to cut the cake. Phyllis tries to say how Stephen is disappointed that Amanda missed the dinner and didn’t call, but you can tell he doesn’t care and it’s Phyllis who is pissed. Amanda apologizes, and then starts gushing about being in the play. You can tell Phyllis isn’t impressed, and when Amanda asks for some coffee, Phyllis kinda mocks her. It’s really weird, and you can tell there’s been a layer of tension building between these two. This is one thing that this show is strong for, it builds these relationships and the changes within them over the course of the whole show. But I digress. Point is, Phyllis don’t like Amanda.

The next day at school Amanda, Monkey Ears and Busy are hanging out and they hvae their report cards. You can tell by Amanda’s face it is not good. Move over Chrissy, Amanda is now the new flunky.

At home, Phyllis comes up to Amanda and tells her that her teacher called her and let her know that Amanda is doing shitty at school. She asks her if anything is going on, and Amanda says no, but it’s implied that her grades are suffering cuz of this acting stuff. I don’t get how she’s doing this bad now when they haven’t even started play rehearsals yet. She’s definitely basically going to fail her grade if she can’t even handle school/play stuff now, as it seems all they do based on the previous episode is pretended to sleep.

Later on Amanda is chit chatting with Milan on the phone. Phyllis comes in and tells her they need to talk about her declining grade point average at some point. Amanda says she’s busy phone sexing and can they please do it later? Phyllis says fine, and they set a date for after school the next day. “They” meaning Phyllis, because Amanda barely acknowledges her mom in this scene.

The next day at school Busy’s playing hacky sack with some randos. Offtopic, but has hacky sack come back? I feel like it was an extremely 90’s hobby, and considering the 90’s are a thing now, I’m surprised more of the youth aren’t partaking. Maybe they are playing with devil sticks? My old ass has no clue. Busy asks Amanda why she wasn’t in math class, and Amanda says she never finished the assignment so she decided to skip. Oh and also she dyed a strip of her hair blue for some reason. Busy asks her where her mom is taking her on her celebratory good report card dinner, and Amanda says they aren’t going anywhere cuz her report card was balls. She then starts bitching to Busy about how her mom expects her to be perfect, and Busy is just like “mmmhmmm”. I feel like she probably hears this daily from Amanda. Amanda then peaces out as she’s having her first day of rehearsal for the play.

A short scene after shows Amanda and Milan meeting up for rehearsal.

We go back to Busy playing hacky sack with the other kids and Phyllis has now arrived, as she and Amanda had that coffee date set up. Busy kinda rats Amanda out saying she is not here and at rehearsal. Phyllis has the look of death in her eyes and goes off to find her wayward daughter.

The next scene is at the rehearsal, with Amanda and Milan going over some lines. We see Phyllis inching up behind them like Michael Myers (it’s spooky season, I gotta compare her to something Halloween!). Milan notices and gestures to Amanda, who is mortified her mother is here embarrassing her in front of her theatre posse. Phyllis tells Amanda to get her goddamn ass home as soon as this is done. So yeaaaah, the boiling point between these two is getting closer and closer by the second.

The next scene Amanda comes home and her and Phyllis start getting into a VERY teenage girl vs. her mother argument. Honestly, the writers wrote this scene pretty perfectly, because they were both acting exactly how a mother and daughter feud would be at this age. Amanda’s definitely in her “I hate my mom phase” of teenagedom, telling Phyllis basically that she doesn’t care what she thinks, she can’t control her and generally being a snotty little biotch. Phyllis is also really playing the overbearing mom role well, trying to know every little aspect of Amanda’s life and trying to find out if she’s been getting busy with Milan. The fight ends with Phyllis telling her she’s out of the play because her grades are crap and Amanda throwing out the classic “I hate you” line.

The next day Busy and Amanda are walking and discussing this whole stupid situation. Busy tells Amanda she should just apologize, and of course Amanda says no. Busy says she’s an actress so just act like you’re sorry (which is a good strategy). Amanda calls Phyllis as she’s required to check in, and asks if it’s ok to study and have dinner at Busy’s. But little does Phyllis know that Amanda is actually still going to her rehearsal’s… so yeah, this is definitely going to end up well.

And it basically ends up shit. Amanda’s at rehearsal chatting with Carla, when the director tells her that her mom called and said she’s not allowed in the play or the acting company anymore, with Amanda looking crushed. Honestly, this really could’ve been dealt with if Amanda had just went and had the stupid coffee with her mom. I do feel bad for Amanda in this scene though, even though she’s brought most of this on herself.

After the rehearsal is over, Amanda’s outside writing in her diary in front of Milan’s car (weird place to write in a diary, but whatever). She tells him she wanted to say goodbye, and he asks if she wants to go for a drive. Amanda says yes, as long as they avoid the hell hole that is her home.

They end up at a cute little outdoor cafe. Amanda’s telling Milan if she had a kid who wanted to do something she wouldn’t stop them. Milan basically says he agrees, but only if it wasn’t hurting the kid. Then she starts complaining about her mom not giving her the chance, and Milan is like Jesus Christ shut up, aka he playful flicks water at her with his straw. I can’t even imagine how sick these people are of hearing stories about Amanda’s mom, especially poor Busy. She’s probably thanking her lucky stars Milan came around. The waiter pretty much gives them that look that everyone who has worked in food service or retail knows, aka “get the fuck out we are closing now.” Amanda asks if they can drive around more as she still isn’t ready to go back.

Anyway, they finally end up back at Amanda’s at God knows what time. Milan tells her he won’t leave until he knows she’s safely inside (what a gent), and then they kiss. I mean I guess they were building up to it, but I wasn’t as excited as the Frankie kiss. She tells Milan she will never see him again (she’s so dramatic, how can her mother NOT let her be an actress?) and he’s like umm yes you will, you aren’t going to war. But yeah she kinda is, as the Royal Rumble is about to happen.

Amanda goes inside the loft’s main entrance, but decides she’s still not ready to face Phyllis. She ends up falling asleep on a little couch in the lobby. She eventually gets woken up by a police officer who tells her that her parents were getting ready to put her face on a milk carton because no one had any clue where the heck she was.

So Amanda goes into the house and first thing Phyllis does is hug her as she’s relived her daughter isn’t lying dead in a ditch. Amanda apologizes for making her worry as she didn’t mean to do that, and Phyllis is like well what the f did you mean to do. Phyllis tells Amanda Stephen’s been out all night driving around, and that she woke up the Ramone house calling to see where she was. This pisses off Amanda even more which makes Phyllis even madder, saying things are going to change around the house.

Phyllis tells her she better straighten her shit up and start behaving like an adult. Stephen comes home and is just relieved Amanda is safe/he can finally go to bed. Amanda goes to her room, but Phyllis isn’t done with the fight. Their neighbours must love living next to this family.

Amanda then basically bursts into tears, saying her mom must hate her for punishing her so much. Ok I got misty eyed here, because 1. Laura Bertram is incredible at crying! Like she should’ve been on a major drama show, because she’s so good at it and 2. I could relate to this scene so much. I had massive blow outs with my mom growing up that often ended in tears/hugging like this. I think this scene is very relatable to most of us who were once teenage girls. P.S. I had one of these types of fights with my mom this summer, so it still happens even near 40!

Phyllis then also cries and says she’d never hate Amanda. Basically she was worried about her, and how things have been going with her. Amanda says Phyllis needs to “let me make my own mistakes” like nice nod to the title, and she won’t be exactly who Phyllis wants her to be. I never thought Phyllis was ever trying to make Amanda be something she’s not. She just wanted her to not fail in school, and not be a little snotty brat. I guess now that I’m in the Phyllis age range, I see it more from her point of view.

Anyway, they make amends, and the episode ends with Phyllis recalling when she almost lost Amanda as a child.

Geez this episode was dramatic, and not in a good way. I am so so happy to say this is the LAST Amanda and Phyllis fight episode of the series. I think we’ve all had our fill of this story line.

Next episode – Busy has an encounter with a fuck boy.

Season 5, Episode 4: Your Own Money

Hello readers! No, your eyes do not deceive you, I am posting within a recent time frame of the last review (meaning less than six months later). I do have a good reason for that though, and it’s to let you all know that I recorded a podcast! Amy and Brit of the Still Not Ready podcast invited me on to review Season 3, Episode 4: Under One Roof. It was really fun to chat with them, and learn that we all live within minutes from each other in Guelph, Ontario. So I think it’s safe to say that Guelph is the hub of premium Ready or Not reviewers. So please follow their podcast, because they are really funny and their reviews are great, and go check out that episode we recorded together! It was my first podcast ever, so hopefully I don’t sound insane. I will also link to it on the Instagram.

In some less exiting housekeeping news, I finally updated all the menu items, so instead of just saying “Episode 1, 2 etc” under each season, it now says the name of the episode. I figured that makes it easier to locate specific episodes if I put their actual titles.

Well that’s mainly it for news items, so let’s get on with this review.

The episode opens with Busy at Amanda’s, and she’s playing around with Stephen’s keyboard. I guess they managed to get it fixed after it was damaged during Amanda’s alcohol-free rager. Stephen lets Busy play a song she’s been working on, complete with lyrics and music. I gotta say, Busy is much better solo, at least in comparison to when she was working with Sag and Maxine. She plays a decent song, and talks about how you can make some damn cool music with a keyboard like that. Amanda let’s her know that Stephen is selling it since he has bought a new one. Busy gets super excited and asks Stephen if she could buy it. Stephen says slow your roll child, it’s $1500 and I highly doubt Sam is giving you those funds in your allowance. Considering Busy works for free at the butcher shop, that’s a fair assessment. So now she’s gotta figure out a way to make some dough.

Speaking of Sag, we finally see him again in the next scene. Busy’s finishing up at the butcher shop, or so she thought, and is about to go hang out with Sag. Unfortunately a shipment of meat was late being delivered, and Sam tells Busy she can’t leave until it’s put away. She tells Sag she’ll meet up with him later and proceeds to help out, while bitching that she doesn’t even get paid for this child labour. Sam says she gets payment in food/clothes/housing but like…she’s underage and you birthed her Sam, so that’s not a really valid argument. I mean, maybe for someone nearing 45 like Manny who still mooches off the family and lives at home, but for a minor such as Busy, that’s not really applicable.

The next scene Sag and Busy are walking along and she’s telling Sag how awesome the keyboard is, but it’s super expensive. Sag tells her to do what any normal person would and get a job. Busy says easier said than done aka why don’t you do it. Sag says fine let’s both look for jobs. They then decide to head to “Zap Records” (pretty sure that’s what it is called).

They get to the record store and I guess start looking for jobs in the newspapers there. Apparently all that’s available is telemarketing. Ok first of all, aren’t they 14 years old? Are they legally even allowed to work yet? (I literally just checked and 14 is the age in Ontario, I dunno why I thought it was 15 so never mind that prior sentence). Secondly, go work at McDonald’s like every other teenager does. Actually my first job was at Zellers, and I ended up getting fired, so I was pretty happy when they went out of business. Take that, Zellers. Anyway, Sag says they need to “create their own destiny”. Busy is like wtf does that mean, and he says they should apply where they want to, and says like this record store. He suggests that Busy ask if they are hiring, and her scared ass says no, you do it. So off he goes.

Sag goes up to the manager and asks if they are hiring. The guy says yes and tells him they can go fill out an application. Busy and Sag start filling out the applications, with Busy saying this is her dream job. Sag starts saying that he knows more about music than her, ergo he should get the job. He also mentions the role is for stock boy (even though the manager said “stock clerk” when Sag asked about the job). Busy reminds him she lifts huge boxes of meat daily for her dad and she’s likely a lot stronger then his pansy ass. They both start going on about how the job probably has cool perks like discounts, access to concert tickets etc. Busy tells Sag she’s glad he’s not weird about them competing for the same job, and Sag says “let the universe unfold as it may.” 100% dude thinks he’s getting the job from this whole interaction. Also, I swear I am not trying to be rude, but in some of these scenes Sag looks like he has no teeth and it weirds me out.

The next scene Sam is pulling into the house and Busy is fixing up her bike. He tells her he knows how hard she works at the shop and he wants to give her a $5 allowance increase. Busy tells him that she wants to try looking for an actual job so she can buy stuff. Sam tells her that the whole family has worked at the shop (seriously, just hire an employee!), but Busy says she would like to try it out there on her own. Sam says “ah that’s great,” and I honestly can’t tell if he’s proud of her or if he’s annoyed by the situation.

The next scene Busy is at Zap Records with Amanda waiting for her job interview. She’s super nervous, but very prepared with her references and questions to ask the boss. Sag comes out of his interview with all the confidence of a mediocre white man, saying that he and Dave the manger chatted about some record, and therefore he thinks that he got the job because their personalities meshed well. He gives Busy a smug “good luck” as she goes in for her interview.

During Busy’s interview, the boss acts super unprofessional while interviewing her, he answers two phone calls during it, one with an employee and another with his booty call. While it seems like Busy’s interview wasn’t great, it was pretty obvious he is interested in her as he discusses her retail experience and tells her the hours she’d be working. But yeah, the scene really gives no indication she’d end up being hired. Also why’s this guy have so many Troll dolls in his office?

During dinner at the Ramone house, Sheila, Manny, Frankie, Busy and Sam are all eating at the table. Frankie is complaining that Busy is getting to escape the butcher shop before he did, and Busy tells him to shut his hole as he left for the same reason she’s hoping to, i.e. getting a real job. Sam says that now that Busy is out, Manny will have to work Saturdays, which pisses him and Sheila off as that is their only day to be around one another….but realistically, how often do you guys think Manny actually works? Again, has Sam used his family as labour the whole time the butcher shop has been in existence? This dilemma would be easily solved by hiring a weekend person….

Anyway, it looks like Dave ended up calling Sam for a reference, as he told him Busy was a good worker. Also this scene grosses me out cuz they are all eating and talking with their mouths full of food. I mean, it’s realistic, but I don’t like it, so no screenshots.

So I guess Dave pretty much decided immediately, because the next scene Busy is at Amanda’s stating she got the job and will be starting tomorrow. Amanda is happy and knew that she’d get it over Sag. Busy says she should call him, but Amanda’s like, no….his ego definitely won’t be able to handle it. Busy goes up to Stephen and lets him know she will be able to pay for the keyboard through instalments now that she has a job that pays real money. Stephen is a bit hesitant, and says he has to take it back if she can’t pay, but Busy assures him she’ll definitely be able to handle it.

Busy comes back home and a short scene has Sam handing Busy some envelope telling her she owes $20 a week for room and board. Damn that’s like $80 a month…. For a part time job that was likely $6.00 something an hour that really would take a bite out of Busy’s income. She’s pretty much like wtf, but accepts it, as she doesn’t want Sam to know she can’t handle things.

The next day Busy is at the record shop and the manager is showing her the ropes. She bends down to open a box, and Sag comes in and doesn’t see her, asking Dave about the job. She pops up, and Dave is saved from an awkward moment as his booty call has once again rang him at work, so he runs off to have some phone sex.

Sagittarius is none too pleased to see that Busy got hired, and even goes as far as to say “it was probably the gender thing.” Busy says yeah it was actually probably because I have experience, and didn’t go into an interview thinking I had it in the bag just because I am pretentious male music lover. Anyway, Sag says congrats, but you can tell his ego is badly bruised and he scampers off. It’s awkwardness to the Nth degree.

Later on, Busy is playing around with the keyboard she has brought home after buying it from Stephen. Sam comes in and asks how she bought that since it was likely expensive. Busy says with the new job money, and again Sam is super vague with his behaviour saying “You should’ve talked to us.” Is he saying that because he thinks she can’t afford it or they would’ve helped pay for it? Who knows. He also drops off Busy’s portion of the phone bill.

The next scene Busy is complaining to Sheila about this whole Sam money situation. It’s nice to see they are now on good terms with one another. Busy thinks it’s not fair that Sam doesn’t make Frankie or Sheila and Manny pay anything, and he’s clearly doing it to make her go crawling back to the butcher shop. Sheila says Sam wants her to learn the value of a dollar, and that when she first was on her own she didn’t even “know how to balance a cheque book.” Does anyone actually do that? I certainly do not.

The next day Busy and Amanda come up to Sag and Busy tells him she bought the keyboard and he should come over and see it sometime. But Sag is still majorly sucking out about the losing out on the job to Busy, and says he’s busy and he’ll talk to her later. Busy is like what’s his problem, and Amanda’s like who cares, don’t feel guilty about getting the job. But you can tell Busy is getting mighty irritated with Sag acting like a little bitch and letting it affect their friendship.

Busy is later at work and is finally get her first pay cheque. She opens it and is shocked at how low it is. Dave explains to her the many deductions we all have to deal with paying into such as taxes and EI, but he also says that she had to pay for her own t-shirt which I think is bullshit. If she has to wear that shirt, it shouldn’t be something she has to pay for. I would’ve been pissed if I had to buy my aprons when I worked at Starbucks.

The next day at school, Busy see’s Sag and tells him the job is borderline slave labour for how little it pays and he should be happy he didn’t get it. She asks him why he still hasn’t come to see the keyboard, and he says again he’s been busy. She then asks why he’s sucking out and he tells her she knew he wanted the job, and that if it wasn’t for him she wouldn’t even have known about it. So I guess because he wanted it means he should’ve gotten it over Busy? Busy says she was more qualified, simple as that and asks what about all his mumbo jumbo about the universe unfolding as it should? He said it must’ve been out of alignment. God Sag is even more obnoxious then usual in this episode, what a friggin’ baby.

Amanda is then at Busy’s house going over her many, many expenses thanks to Sam. It turns out that after all her “bills” she’s left with a measy 25 cents, and that doesn’t include the keyboard. Amanda tells Busy she basically needs to get another job, and Busy is over it. Honestly she may as well just quit if Sam is going to grift her like that, because if she can’t even afford the keyboard what’s the point of working? Reminds me of nowadays and how it’s borderline pointless to work when cost of living is so out of control. Gotta love Capitalism!

The next scene Frankie is helping Busy lug the keyboard back downstairs, as she can no longer afford it, so she’s taking it back to Stephen. Sam comes by and is like what are you doing, and Busy basically says she overestimated the cost. She hands Sam the money she owes for her part of the household and you can tell Sam is pretty shocked by this whole event. He tells Busy he’s not taking her money, and that he gave her brothers invoices back in the day and they never gave him a dime. He was trying to teach Busy the value of money, and honestly this is a pretty good lesson for a parent to teach a teenager and I’m very glad he didn’t actually make her pay anything for the household. I do think Busy acted pretty responsible because had this been me I would’ve lost my shit if my dad if he tried to pull this haha. But it’s clear Busy is pretty mature beyond her years.

At the end Sam forces Frankie to bring the keyboard back upstairs (lol) and tells Busy to wear headphones when rehearsing, because he doesn’t want to hear it til it’s on the radio, which I thought was pretty cute. Sam is so much better this season compared to previous ones, they really developed his character growth a lot.

Overall I enjoyed this episode. I like the idea of Busy working at a record store, it seems right. Sag was extremely annoying with his behaviour though, definitely came off as very entitled. I actually am not sure if Sag and Busy have much contact after this episode. I remember him being in the Grad episode briefly later on, but after that I’m not sure? I’m sure us viewers are heartbroken at not being able to hear anymore of Sag’s pearls of wisdom.

Next episode….. get ready, another Amanda vs. Phyllis one and it’s a blow out. Please God let this be the last one. Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 3: Cross My Heart

Hi everyone, Happy 2022! I haven’t posted since New Year’s Eve 2021…damn. Well my excuse is full time work and part-time grad school. BUT now that one of those is done for now, I am extremely happy to be able to devote more time to here. I also have something exciting Ready or Not related happening in the nearish future, so I’ll definitely update on that once it occurs (I will post it on the Instagram aka readyornotreviewed as well).

Anyway, now that I’ve gotten my lame excuse out of the way, let’s get on with this review. Honestly, I barely remember this episode, so it will be a fun(?) walk down memory lane.

The episode opens with Amanda talking about her new theatre company and how the director is a real stickler for whatever actors do. Busy says Amanda only joined the theatre because of hot guys, which Amanda is for some reason insulted by. But I mean…. the Jewish school…Neon Vomit…. need I go on, Amanda?

Suddenly we hear a noise and Amanda freaks out saying it’s a mouse and tells Busy to deal with it. Busy opens the closet door and it’s not a mouse, but an annoying child. Turns out this is Amanda’s stepsister Phoebe and she’s quite strange.

Is it a requirement to have characters named Phoebe be oddballs? Anyway, Amanda is all annoyed because Phoebe is wearing some of her clothes and a tiara, and didn’t ask if she could borrow them. Phoebe tells Amanda that Phyllis said she’d be babysitting her tomorrow because her and Stephen are going to a wedding. Amanda says she can’t because she has her acting workshop, so tough luck kid. Phoebe leaves, and Amanda starts bitching to Busy about Phyllis. If you thought the earlier seasons were bad for their showdowns, it really comes to a blow out in Season 5. We hear Phyllis call Amanda, so I guess Phoebe told her what she said, and Amanda goes off to have a bitch out with her mom.

So we see the next day that Amanda is at home with Phoebe and Busy. Stephen is getting ready and explaining things to do so it’s clear she’s still babysitting. Either he gave her really large cheque or Phyllis threatened her with a beating within an inch of her life. Both seem plausible. Stephen rambles off 101 ideas for things for them to do, and Amanda says they should go to her theatre workshop. Phyllis comes by and says no, because that’s too boring for a kid, and that this day is for them to have fun. Amanda’s pretty irritated by that. Remember how Amanda used to want a sister so badly? I guess be careful what you wish for. Phyllis then tells Amanda her skirt is too short and might attract deviants, and Amanda casually bitches to Busy about it in front of her mom. Ah…I’m already tired of this episode. Oh and Phoebe is wrapping Busy up in toilet paper because….reasons.

The next scene we see Amanda changing out of jeans and back into her skirt outside, so she clearly don’t give af about Phyllis trying to police her outfits. They start walking towards the park, and Amanda asks Busy why she can’t help her babysit, with Busy saying she and Manny need to carve up deers or something (or maybe steers? no idea) at the butcher shop. Busy then asks why Amanda’s being such a b about hanging out with Phoebe, and Amanda states the kid is ruining her acting career. Why are these two so friggin’ dramatic about their hobbies? Just do the stupid acting and calm down.

All of a sudden Phoebe lets out a blood curdling scream like she’s being abducted into a windowless van. Apparently she has stepped on an ant named Frieda and killed her. How’s this kid getting through daily life? I’m sure everyday we accidentally kill hundreds of ants. And how’d she even notice a dead ant amongst all the general debris of this dirt path? I dunno, sorry but I find this kid hella annoying. For once I’m Team Amanda.

They have a funeral for the ant, and then Busy runs off because she’s late for work. Phoebe tries to run towards some “dangerous” area of the park, and Amanda scolds her saying she needs to be careful. I guess this is to show Amanda cares about Phoebe, even if she’s ruining her acting career by existing.

Next scene and obviously we are outside the theatre workshop, as no way was Amanda letting this kid make her miss this class. She tells Phoebe she needs to shut her yap and not make a sound while the workshop is going on.

Amanda and Phoebe have some random chatter, and a guy walks by who Amanda smirks at. His name is Milan, and he will be her love interest for the rest of this show. He is played by Daniel Enright, who played a character in a little known, vastly underrated, Canadian show from the 2000’s called Our Hero. It was actually really good, and I have it on DVD, but I think I lost one of the discs….sigh. Incidentally, Jesse Nilsson who played Justin was also on the show. It also includes Canadian actors from Student Bodies, Radioactive etc. Like I said previously, Canadian actors were traded around shows like Pokemon cards…actually I guess since it was the 90’s more like POGs.

In the class, everyone is laying around taking a nap, aka doing some sort of acting exercise. It seems more like the teacher is trying to hypnotize them rather than train them in the craft of acting. Phoebe looks bored out of her skull, and decides to take it upon herself to wake up everyone with her magic wand. Honestly, she’s doing them a favour, I’m sure this class is expensive, no one wants to be paying good money to lay there and sleep.

Amanda is annoyed, and the teacher tells her to kindly remove the child from the class because she’s a distraction.

During a break, Amanda calls Busy and begs her to take Phoebe so she can do the workshop without getting in trouble. Busy finally gives in after extorting Amanda for money, and I don’t blame her.

Amanda gives Phoebe a slice of pizza, even though apparently she can’t eat junk food and even reminds Amanda of that. Amanda doesn’t really care and says it’s fine because it’s vegetarian. She tells Phoebe that she’s going to hang out with Busy for awhile, and that later on they’ll go to the museum once she’s done her class.

Amanda dumps Phoebe off on Busy at the butcher shop and takes off. You can tell Phoebe is disappointed, as Amanda is not even trying to hide how inconvenient this kid is for her. As soon as she leaves, Phoebe starts causing massive problems in the butcher shop, such as annoying customers, messing up the cash register and barfing up her pizza all over the place.

Meanwhile, after class Amanda decides to go get coffee with Milan. They have some conversation about how he grew up Russia and she says she grew up in “boring suburbia.” Milan says he likes boring, so yeah I guess it makes sense why he ends up hooking up with Amanda.

Busy drops Phoebe off back at the theatre, but of course Amanda isn’t around. Busy says she’s probably on stage so just wait til she’s done and go meet up with her. Phoebe goes in, and the only person there is Carla doing some weird interpretive dance on the stage all by herself.

Carla tells Phoebe that the class ended a half an hour ago and Amanda left with Milan. Phoebe says she’ll wait for Amanda in the lobby. We see Phoebe sitting there for God knows how long.

The scene then goes to Amanda and Milan walking around talking about dumb shit. Amanda looks at her watch and finally remembers she has a minor she’s supposed to be taking care of and runs back to the theatre.

Amanda comes back and only Carla is still in the theatre now, as Phoebe is full blown MIA. Amanda starts freaking out and runs off, while Carla looks for Phoebe in the can. Amanda runs around a bit outside the theatre, but still no Phoebe. Carla also cannot find her. Suddenly Amanda see’s some garbage on the ground in the form of a Popsicle stick and runs off to where she thinks Phoebe could be.

Amanda runs back to the park because when they had the Frieda funeral, the cross they made was made from Popsicle sticks, so I guess she thought Phoebe might have gone back to pay her respects. But alas, no Phoebe.

Amanda then looks towards the bridge that leads to the sketchy part of the park and takes off down it. She see’s a man holding a wand that Phoebe had with her this entire time so he must’ve stolen it from her. The poor kid is also hiding under the bridge trying to avoid this weirdo.

Phoebe really gives it to Amanda in that guilt trip way kids are very good at. Amanda asks why she went to this area of the park because she told her it’s dangerous, and Phoebe said since Amanda lied about going to the museum, and also lied about not wearing her skimpy dress and ignored Stephen telling her not to give Phoebe junk food, that basically Amanda’s word is bullshit. They have a hugging moment with Phoebe basically being like why did you abandon me? Ok I changed my mind, I am not team Amanda anymore. Even if this kid was kind of annoying, she didn’t deserve to be abandoned just because Amanda was horny for Milan.

Later in the evening, Amanda is trying to butter up Phoebe by saying that she’s sorry and that if Phoebe wants she can look through Amanda’s stuff from her childhood. Phoebe tells her to go to hell aka she says “can you leave me alone, I have a lot on my mind.” Haha, I’m actually kind of starting to like Phoebe now.

Phyllis and Stephen come home and thank Amanda for watching Phoebe. Phyllis makes sure to add on some extra guilt by saying that Phoebe was excited to spend the whole day with Amanda. Amanda offers to bring Phoebe to her room as she’s fallen asleep on the couch. Phoebe pretends to be asleep, while Amanda apologizes for being a shitty person/babysitter, and hope’s that she will forgive her. She also tells Phoebe she can keep her tiara from the beginning of the episode. The episode ends with Amanda joining Phoebe on the couch and all seems forgiven, also we learn Phoebe had a fish named Karl Marx at some point in her life.

Overall this was a pretty meh episode. At least Phoebe as a character sticks around and isn’t a one off like so many of the others. I dunno why I always thought this episode ended with Phyllis and Amanda having a huge fight over what ended up happening, but I guess that’s not until a later episode. Amanda is lucky Phoebe didn’t rat her ass out, because Amanda caused so many problems for everyone this episode.

Next episode, Sag and Busy compete for a sweet record store job. I actually remember liking this episode, so I am looking forward to revisiting it. Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 2: Your Fifteen Minutes Are Up

Happy weird in between Christmas and New Year’s week, everyone! I hope your holidays so far have been swell. My Christmas was pretty quiet, and I am one of the unlucky ones that had to go back to work this week, so wahhh. October and November were super busy for me, working and grad school was intense. I’m happy to report I got an A and A- as my final grades, so yay not sucking!

I apologize in advance if this is one of your favourite episodes, because I am not a fan, and I won’t likely be hiding that within this review. As you guys already know I hate one character episodes, and this character is fucking obnoxious. I gotta say, it makes me feel good to take a mocking lens to this show when it calls for it, and boy does this episode call for it.

The episode opens with children picking up garbage by the side of the Don River, and for some reason a camera crew with a reporter is there to film it. Must’ve been a slow news day in Toronto.

Amanda and Busy are walking along, picking up trash, and Amanda starts asking Busy weird things like what kind of tree she would be. It turns out there is reasoning behind her odd questions, as Amanda is preparing for an audition to a theatre company. They have a bit more small talk regarding how they basically skipped school to take part in this Don River clean up, when all of a sudden they hear a scream.

We then see some random girl named Caitlin at the freaking splish splash show, aka drowning as she gets carried down river. Caitlin is played by Kathryn Long, who you may recognize as Carly Beth from the first Goosebumps episode, The Haunted Mask. According to IMBD, Sag i.e. Amos Crawley, is also in that episode. I swear, in the 90’s Canadian TV had like 20 actors and they all rotated between different shows. Anyway, Busy and Amanda notice and take off to try and save her, as apparently no one was monitoring the water safety situation.

Busy tries to reach for Caitlin with an old umbrella, but she misses and goes further down the river. This screen shot is hilarious to me, she looks she’s being consumed by The Blob with that face she’s making.

Busy and Amanda take off along the river, now climbing rocks to try and reach to where Caitlin is floating off to. Caitlin finally manages to grab hold to a branch and stops for a bit. Busy ends up climbing some sort of structure that is over the river near where Caitlin is. I’m wondering if a stunt double was used for this part, probably was, as even if this wasn’t over the river, that is a pretty big jump.

Amanda is utterly horrified at her friend’s dangerous attempts to save this dumb girl’s life. Busy lowers herself onto her stomach to try and reach the umbrella for Caitlin to grab. However, it’s clearly obvious that she’s still way too far away for Caitlin to be able to reach for it. She tries, but fails and ends up continuing her baby Moses float down the river. You can tell Busy is getting mighty irritated by this whole situation. I couldn’t capture the image, but she does a FML face when Caitlin resumes drowning.

Caitlin finally manages to grab another log, this time it’s much closer to the shore. She seriously could’ve pulled herself to the shore, but well… you’ll understand why she doesn’t later on. Busy races to her and manages to finally save her drowned rat ass, pulling her out of the river. While this is all occurring, the news crew just happens to be conveniently filming this entire event.

So we see the reporter interviewing Busy, and you can tell she’s feeling uncomfortable and pretty much like yeah I saved her because I could, and not trying to make a big deal of it. Caitlin is super appreciative and tells Busy she saved her life because apparently she can’t swim. Pretty dumb participating in an event near water then, blondie.

The scene pans out, and we see all the Ramones at home watching the segment on TV. They are basically chatting about what happened. Sam asks the valid question, “where the fuck was the teacher during all this?” Frankie for some reason acts like kind of a dick to Busy, don’t really get it. I notice in these later seasons Frankie is less the sweetheart he was in earlier seasons, boo show. But by contrast, Sam is much more likeable compared to his former asshole self. Anyway, this scene just shows that the family is proud of Busy, as most people would’ve probably let Caitlin flow down the river and eventually into Lake Ontario.

The next day at school, Amanda comes up to Busy and tells her she and the fam saw Busy on the news and she looked awesome. Ever modest Busy just states she looked like a “drowned rat,” (no that was Caitlin) and kinda shrugs it off. Speak of the devil, Caitlin comes up and gives Busy this really cheap looking t-shirt that says “Don River Rescue.” Busy is like wtf, and Amanda is struggling not to laugh, because what actually is this? Busy tells Caitlin she feels weird wearing this, and Caitlin is like why you should be proud and show it off. She then leaves and both the girls are like what a goddamn weirdo.

Later on, Busy is cutting out an article in the newspaper about the rescue. Amanda comes over and starts bitching about Carla also auditioning to join the same acting company that she was talking about earlier in the episode. Sag comes by and makes a funny sarcastic remark about basking in Busy’s glory. He then says maybe Ernie Lipnit can make a comic about her. Caitlin comes over and basically starts talking about how they should be made into a rip off comic version of the X-Men, and everyone is side eyeing the hell out of her. She tells Busy she feels different and everyday is a “wonderful surprise.” I’ll let Busy’s facial expression speak for that remark.

So it’s pretty evident that Caitlin is totally milking this whole rescue situation, and is literally acting like Busy untied her from a train track or something. I’m expecting this girl to soon declare she’s a born again Christian or something. Monkey Ears comes up and tells Busy and Caitlin he wants to do a story for the school paper about the rescue. Amanda mentions that he should include stuff about the clean up, and he basically blows her off. You can tell she’s getting annoyed, because unlike Busy, she does like being the centre of attention. Busy notices, and tells Amanda she should provide commentary as a bystander, but Amanda can’t because she has her audition.

At the audition, Carla calls Amanda over to sit next to her while they wait for their turns to be called. Carla notes all the “excitement” of yesterday, and basically states that Busy is a moron for getting caught up in Caitlin’s stuff. Amanda is like, what are you yammering, about? she saved her life. Carla scoffs and says sure. She then uses an example of Caitlin being super fake in that she wears blue contacts, but her eyes are brown. Amanda says, who cares, but Carla says that Caitlin would adamantly state she has natural blue eyes. So basically according to Carla, Caitlin is a liar and a fake person, I suppose. It’s funny how Carla seems to be a really good judge of character, aka the prior Nina remarks, even though Carla is also a terrible person. I guess it takes one to know one.

Back at the school, Monkey Ears is taking pictures of Caitlin and Busy for the story. Busy notes that she hates having her photo taken, while Caitlin is lovin’ it. Caitlin suggests a reenactment, and Busy says yeah lets get a bucket and an umbrella. LOL, that’s actually great, but Caitlin is none too pleased with being made fun of for her “near death experience.”

Back to the audition, Amanda is interviewing with the teacher and basically states she wants to be an actor to get into the mind’s of characters. The teacher points out that writers can also do that, but Amanda says she needs an audience. To me this shows that at least Amanda is honest with her need for attention, whereas Caitlin is trying to be some innocent little victim, when she is actually trying to milk every second of the fame she’s gotten from this near drowning experience.

At Busy’s house, her, her mom and Frankie are doing some weird fitness test sit up thing when the door bell rings. Busy answers, and it’s Caitlin. Apparently some company wants to give them the Good Samaritan award and it is a trip to Walt Disney World. Ummm… why would Caitlin get this award? Busy saved her, she did nothing but flail around in some nasty river water. So Busy is super stoked, and very excited about this. Frankie asks why Caitlin won the award too (which again, was my thought as well), and she said she was “doing her best for the environment when it happened.” Busy asks how this happened, and Caitlin said the president saw them on the news, then called her mom? I dunno, upon rewatching this episode, this whole situation sounds so sketch.

The next day Sag and Busy are walking, and stalker Caitlin runs up to Busy and tells her that she was able to get them on some teen show. Probably Jonovision (my Canadian 90’s teens will remember that gem). Sag kind of peaces out, and Busy tells Caitlin she feels weird going on a show like that. Amanda comes up super excited, as it’s implied that she got into the theatre company. But before she can say anything, Caitlin cuts her off telling her to convince Busy to go on the show. You can tell Amanda is getting mighty irritated with this chick and also pulls a Sag and walks on ahead.

In their washroom setting, Amanda tells Busy what Carla said about how Caitlin is a liar and can’t be trusted. Busy says she can’t really ignore her after saving her life. Amanda then states that Busy is letting being a hero get to her head, and Busy tells Amanda had it been her she’d be soaking it up, because she’s a huge attention whore. They don’t really have a fight, more of a disagreement. But yeah, this reminds me a lot of the Kurt Browning episode, where Amanda really hated Busy getting so much attention. Having been friends with girls who are like Amanda and always expect you to be on the sideline looking in on them, it’s exhausting.

At lunch time, Caitlin is sitting with Busy and Busy decides to try and find out exactly who this girl is. She asks her if she has any siblings, and Caitlin says her parents stopped after her because she was “gifted.” Busy asks in what, and she says chess. Busy says they should play one day and then Caitlin stammers that she doesn’t play professionally anymore. Monkey Ears and Sag come up to them with the newspaper featuring the article. Caitlin starts going on about how they should do another article about the public response (like anyone would care at this point), and their upcoming trip. ME tells them the next issue is booked for Amanda and Carla as they both got into the theatre company. Caitlin then starts going on and on about how her and Busy can do a world tour of this whole rescue, and Monkey Ears and Sag look weirded out and leave. Caitlin tells Busy that she’s not doing all this for herself, and it’s important to get out their message. What message? Don’t play never a river if you aren’t proficient in swimming? That’s pretty obvious to most people, Caitlin. So this girl is starting to isolate Busy from her friends, what an annoying situation to be in.

A short scene in the hallway, Busy learns that Carla and Amanda are going to the Lakeview to celebrate getting into the theatre program. Busy says she’ll meet up with them in a bit.

Later, Busy is walking outside and see’s Caitlin and runs up to her. She tells her that she’s not comfortable doing the teen interview. Caitlin’s sweet little mask falls off and you can see she’s very pissed, some real narcissistic rage. She tells Busy she has “no right to take that way from her”, so obviously that thing she said two seconds ago in the other scene about it “not being about her” was totally untrue. She admits to Busy that she knows how to swim and she faked the whole thing to get the attention of the film crew that was there. She tells Busy this whole fake rescue has been really good for both of them, and she’s going to ride that wave as long as she can. Busy is like what the actual f is wrong with you, and says she’s not going to be a part of this anymore. Caitlin then threatens Busy, saying if she doesn’t go to the teen show that she’ll confess it was all Busy’s idea. What a psycho B.

The next scene we see Busy talking with her mom about the whole thing, saying she feels the need to expose everything and tell the truth. But on the other hand, it’s not fair that she has to give up the trip because she actually did think she was saving Caitlin. She admits to Lucy that being seen as a hero did feel good, and despite what she was saying this whole episode, she actually did like the attention. Lucy says that’s valid, because unlike Caitlin, she didn’t go seeking this attention. Her mom says the situation is fucked, but she has to be the one to decide what she wants to do.

The next day, Caitlin comes up to Busy and is like, ok my mom will drive us to the studio, so assuming her threats worked. Busy tells her this whole situation is stupid and fake, and therefore she won’t be going. Caitlin of course get’s pissed, and says Busy is ruining her life. Busy is like, you cray girl, get some professional help. Caitlin says she is going anyway, and Busy says no one will give a crap if the hero isn’t there and walks off.

The next scene Busy is contemplating life on a bridge by the Don River. Amanda shows up (apparently Busy’s mom told her she’d be there? Just chilling on a bridge?), and asks why she wasn’t on the show. Amanda confirms that Caitlin didn’t go because the show was about something completely different. So she knew it would be pointless bs without Busy. Busy tells Amanda that Caitlin faked everything, and therefore she didn’t feel right going. Amanda tells Busy pretty much what Lucy said, in that even though Caitlin is fake AF, Busy seriously thought she was saving someone and is still a hero. She tells Amanda she gave the tickets back for the trip because they don’t deserve to go. I was thinking this whole thing was fake, because I could see a pathological liar like Caitlin making this up and then telling Busy it mysteriously got “cancelled” but I guess it was legit.

The episode ends with Busy and Amanda walking along the bridge talking about what the show was actually about, which was a pet psychic.

Whooo boy did I hate this episode. It is possibly one of my least favourite of this entire series. I am not sure what the point of this was? We already know Busy has good moral character from numerous other episodes, such as the Heros episode from last season, and the Black, White or Maybe Grey from season one. Caitlin was an extremely annoying character, and I honestly wish she did end up drowning. I’m sure if this character actually existed, they’d be enjoying getting their attention whore needs filled by posting cringe dance videos to Tik Tok.

Anyway, I wanted to squeeze in one more review for 2021. I’ll admit my updating wasn’t amazing this year, but again, I feel like I’m trying to postpone the inevitable with the end of this show. But I hope you guys have a great New Year’s and that 2022 somehow is less ridiculous than these last couple of years! (But probably won’t be, let’s be real).

Next episode, Amanda flirts with a boy and loses a child. Until next time!

Season 5, Episode 1: Coming Home

Hello everyone! How’s summer treating you? Mine’s been pretty fun so far, got to see some family up in Northern Ontario, then my bestie and I went to Grand Bend, I visited my other bestie in Kingston etc. So good times. I’m currently on vacation, so of course it’s the best time to begin a new review. (Edit: I started writing this two weeks ago, so now I’m back at work, waaahhh).

Before I begin, I also want to say I started an Instagram for this blog. I know…like four seasons later, but I’ve been listening to a lot of Ready or Not podcasts lately, (highly recommend Still Not Ready, the girls are hilarious and they also managed to snag an interview with Miss Laura Bertram herself!) so I figured I should also up my social media game and create one. You can find it under the name readyornotreviewed, and it will mostly be random funny posts and blog updates. So follow me and join the fun of my sporadic postings!

Well now… we are nearing the end, the last season of this special show. I must say, Season Five is unfortunately my least favourite of all the seasons. Mainly because there are SO many one character episodes this season which I hate, and also the series finale is kinda meh IMO. But of course that doesn’t mean I think it’s bad, because I love this corny show with all my heart. But if I had to rank the seasons, five would be last. (For the record it would be Season 3, 2, 1, 4 and 5 if you so happen to care).

But, we must prevail and finish this show, so let’s begin our journey with Season Five, Episode One, Coming Home.

The episode opens with Busy and Amanda walking through I’m pretty sure Chinatown in downtown Toronto. Busy is saying that her grandmother is bored at home recovering from a surgery so she’s taken to making weird little craft items for the family. Amanda spots a dude that looks like Dom in the crowd, which is odd as he is supposed to be away at university. Busy is sus and goes to check him out. She calls out his name, and you can tell Dom is none too pleased to have been seen by her as he awkwardly says “Oh, HeeeeeAAAAAY Biz”.

Busy asks him what he’s doing here since apparently it’s around exam time and he should be at school. First off, Dom says “Hey new look!” So did he not see her at all last season? Didn’t come home for Christmas or anything? ANYWAY, that’s me being critical as per usual. But yeah, Dom is acting super sketch and says he’s in town to see Cheryl at some party. He tells Busy he’s staying at a friend’s place since his parents are away. Busy asks if he’ll at least come for dinner, but he replies that Sam will smack his ass if he’s not studying 24/7. Busy makes a weird face at that comment, because she knows the family would love to see Dom if he’s in town.

Busy notes that Dom is looking like trash, to which he says he fell asleep on the bus. She tells him to come say hi to Amanda. Amanda says she heard from Biz that the dorm is “one big party”, to which Dom shoots down and they are both like… mmkay. He asks Busy to borrow some money, and to my annoyance it looks like she hands him American money. Take pride in our Monopoly money Ready or Not, and stop pretending this is Amurica! Dom then scampers off, but not without first telling Busy not to say a damn thing to their parents about him being back. So he is definitely acting weird AF, and Busy notices.

Busy rushes home to take care of her Nona who seems fine considering she’s recovering from knee surgery. Lucy comes in a couple minutes later, exhausted from her exams. I’m assuming she’s now in university, so I really like that the show has continued on with her education story line. Lucy gets irate though, because Nona has started dinner, when Busy is supposed to be helping out at home this week while her grandma rests. Sheila, Sam and Frankie then come home with Sheila talking about prenatal classes, so the pregnancy story line is still ongoing, but she doesn’t look preggers at all. The phone rings and Frankie and Busy both rush for it, as I am assuming Busy thinks it’ll be Dom. She gets annoyed with Frankie and tells him to get the hell off the phone. Do they not have call waiting? At this point in the 90’s I’d think it would be common, but who knows. Anyway, this scene is the usual Ramone chaotic energy, but I like it.

The next scene Busy calls Amanda, who is reading a book on “British Etiquette” while wearing her Columbia House pj shirt again. She answers the phone in a weird British accent, to which Busy is like da fuk. Amanda says she’s practicing her accent for reasons entirely unknown, but whatevs.

So it turns out Busy didn’t hear from Dom, so she decided to call Cheryl and Dante, the friend he said he was staying with. Both of them were like we haven’t talked to him in ages, which now has Busy worried Dom is having issues. Amanda tries to play it off saying that things are probably fine and that Busy is worried for no reason, but Busy is still none too convinced everything is ok with her big bro. She goes to sleep in a state of discontent.

Later at night, Busy turns over in her bed and Dom is standing over her like a fucking weirdo home intruder. I have no idea how she didn’t scream at seeing a man in the shadows right upon waking up. Busy’s like wtf are you doing here at midnight. Dom is acting all weird and kinda hyper, and asks Busy for a clean shirt. So like before I knew what the deal was with his situation, I remember totally thinking he was on drugs or something. He’s just acting very out of character. I mean, I guess spoiler if you haven’t seen the episode, but it ends up that Dom is on academic probation. I don’t think that would mean he would be getting kicked out of his dorm though (but if this has happened to anyone correct me if I’m wrong!) so why is he acting like he’s homeless? He also is apparently starving, and decides to go get some food in the kitchen, which again, academic probation doesn’t mean you have no money? But it does seem to be heavily implied that Dom has gotten too much into partying later in the episode, so maybe he did spend all his funds on blow and booze.

Dom goes into the kitchen and starts scarfing down food like it’s The Last Supper. Busy yet again asks Dom what the hell is going on with him, and tells him she called Cheryl and asked why Dom lied. Dom says he didn’t lie, but he didn’t tell the truth lol, ok buddy. Dom tells Busy he messed up. Busy asks if he knocked up some girl or burned down his dorm room, to which Dom says no to both. Busy asks what the fuck is going on then because you are starving and sneaking around your house like some weirdo who lives in people’s ceilings and steals their food. Busy finally has had enough of Dom’s vague bs, and tries to go to tell the parents, to which Dom says NO and that “he thought he could trust her.” Well maybe try telling her what the hell is going on? It honestly could be anything, from Dom failed a class to Dom is involved in a major drug trafficking ring because he’s saying jack shit. But just as this conflict is occurring, we hear someone approaching from upstairs and Dom slides behind the kitchen island.

It’s Lucy, who has awoken due to all the racket her kids have been causing. Busy tries to play it cool and says she woke up and had a hankering for some chicken. Dom left his backpack on the island, and Busy tries to subtly pass it to him, but he ends up running out of the house before she can. Lucy is tired because of her never ending exams, and thinks she heard the front door (which she did as it was Dom fleeing), but Busy manages to convince her it’s all in her head and to go back to sleep.

The next day Busy is going through Dom’s backpack and finds a letter from his University. Based on her concerned face, it is likely the letter telling him to get his goddamn act together or else his ass is out of his program.

At the breakfast table, the Ramones are having small talk, with Nona stating she had a dream that Dom was there, so Busy is like oh shit. Luckily Lucy and Sam basically treat her like she’s senile and don’t really notice it. Lucy asks Busy what’s wrong as she looks more mopey than usual. Busy says she has a “friend” who is in trouble because she is flunking everything. Question for Canadian readers, did you guys ever say flunking? I feel like most people would say failing everything, but maybe that’s just me. This is the second time this show has used the term flunking (i.e. Chrissy’s last episode), but I’m curious if it was used commonly in other people’s schools. Other nationalities feel free to chime in as well. Anyway, Frankie asks if she’s cute so he can tutor her, Sheila suggests going to the guidance counselor, and Sam basically threatens her and says “bring her home we’ll straighten her out.” LOL what is he planning on doing? A Clockwork Orange type situation on this hypothetical person?

The phone rings and it’s Dom. He makes some small talk with Lucy, but asks for Busy because he needs his bag on a stick aka his backpack. He tells Busy to meet him at The Lakeview after school. Sam is annoyed he didn’t get to talk to him, but also annoyed he called long distance during the most expensive time? Make up ya damn mind Samuel. All the Ramones are also curious why Dom wanted to talk to Busy, as he barely acknowledged her existence when he was home. So it’s getting harder for Busy to keep this lie up.

Arriving at school, Busy is bitching to Amanda about this whole situation and how Dom’s fucked because he’s on academic probation and he basically needs a Hail Mary and pass his exams or he’ll be kicked out. She goes on to say that their parents made huge sacrifices and brag all about Dom going to “college.” Again this seems to be referencing American things, because while we do have colleges here, most likely Dom went to university. I mean he could’ve went to college, but college in the States is equivalent to university in Canada. University is expensive, and you get a four year Bachelor’s degree, whereas college for the most part is two years, and you get a diploma #themoreyouknow.

Busy tells Amanda that the parents are basically going to disown Dom for this, which has Amanda saying that’s not going to help and it’s not the end of the damn world. Busy is really pissed he lied to her, but it’s weird to me that suddenly Busy cares so much about Dom. I feel like this should’ve been a Frankie story line, as they’ve always been closer siblings, but I guess he’s too young because he’s still in high school so this wouldn’t work.

After school, the girls are at the Lakeview waiting for Dom. Busy is saying that her parents as basically never going to allow her to go to college because of Dom’s fuck up. Amanda’s like ok chill, you aren’t your brother, and you’ll all be fine in the end. Busy is convinced Dom is not long for this world once Sam get’s his hands on him. It’s interesting seeing Amanda be the rational one for once and Busy the emotional wreck.

We hear a male voice, and while it actually sounds like Dom, it turns out to be Frankie. He tells Busy that his friend said he saw her with Dom the other day. Busy says its bullshit, but then ‘fesses up that Dom is here and is failing everything at school. Frankie asks what Busy thinks she can do, and that she can’t protect him, which has Busy annoyed and she storms off. Also seeing this screen shot makes me sad about the never-to-be Amanda and Frankie relationship. Yes I will never shut up about this, look how cute they both are with their glow-ups, it was a goddamn lost opportunity!

Frankie chases after Busy and tells her he’s not mad at her but at Dom. He says he is aware that things are not good with him. Busy asks how he knows and he says when he went to visit him a couple months ago he was a raging alcoholic who basically bombed all his midterms. Dom was on the cusp of dropping out then and there apparently but decided to stay, even though Frankie told him he should come home. Frankie feels guilty for not saying anything, but there’s not much that could have been done. I’m assuming the tuition was already paid by the Ramone parents, so it was really only Dom’s year to fuck up himself. Busy says they’re going to get their lousy brother to come home so they can all deal with this situation.

Next scene Busy is riding her bike down the mean streets of Toronto i.e. probably Etobicoke because this looks like major suburbia, looking for Dom. She happens to find him literally one second later as he steps out on a path in front of her. Dom is all pissed because he saw Frankie go into the Lakeview and he assumes she told Frankie. Busy replies that everyone can notice Dom’s disheveled look all over town, and he’s been spotted by others. He gets mad because she didn’t bring his backpack. She pulls out his academic probation letter and Dom starts ripping it up like a crazy person. Honestly, I get he’s supposed to be all agitated and anxious because this is a shitty situation, but he looks like he’s tweaking out right now. He basically confesses that he has majorly fucked up his year because he had no structure and way too much freedom and partied too much. Just FYI Dom, your first year of university means nothing, unless you are planning on getting funding which doesn’t seem to be the case because he’s parents are paying his way. I mean it sucks, but third and fourth year are a lot more important in terms of going further i.e. a Masters and beyond. If he doesn’t want to do that then chill out man, C’s get degrees!

Busy says he still needs to come home and tell their parents, because it’s a lot better they hear about this from him then the school which is definitely true.

The last scene and we’re at the Ramone’s with Sam and Lucy preparing dinner while Nona stands around being ignored. Busy comes in saying she just talked to Dom, and makes it sound like he just got into an accident or something in how she says it. She tells them that Dom is here in the city and he’s failing his classes. Sam’s like “hahahahah no he’s getting good marks” and Busy is like “no man, he’s failing” and we just see this dark cloud pass over Sam’s face in an instance, probably realizing he just blew thousands of dollars on this wasted education.

Sam reacts how honestly I think any parent would at being lied to about something so big and says he’s going to kill him. Busy’s like yeah I knew you’d pull out the murder threat card and so did he. Lucy tries to be the rational one and is like just tell him to come home and we will deal with it no matter what. Dom comes in and Lucy looks near tears, but Sam is looking really unpredictable, like he could either hug him or wallop him.

Sam tells Dom to sit his ass down and the music sounds very ominous. Dom sits there awaiting his fate, and it looks like Sam is mere minutes from taking his hands to his throat and choking the last breath out of him.

But I guess the family therapy has helped, or maybe Sam is too hungry to deal with this bullshit, because he decides they are going to eat dinner before deciding how to handle this situation. The episode ends with the Ramone’s having light-hearted banter. We also actually do see Sheila’s stomach and she does look somewhat pregnant now (but not in this screenshot so what the actual hell?)

This episode was pretty good. I’m glad we had a Dom-centric episode, considering how many characters before him got their own who did not deserve it *cough* Peter *cough*. It was pretty heavy though, and we never really get a resolution to Dom’s school stuff as far as I remember. This episode definitely had a Flunky feel to it, but unlike Chrissy, Dom is actually a likeable character, so I hope he figured his shit out and went back to school. I’m assuming he did, because I honestly don’t remember seeing much of Dom for the rest of the show. *tear*

Next episode, a stupid girl fakes drowning in the Don Valley River to get famous. The first of our many one character episodes of this season…ugh…not looking forward to it. Until next time!

Season 4, Episode 13: What’s Yours Is Mine

Hi guys, holy crap we’re finally at the end of Season 4!! I honestly never thought we’d see this day. Only one season left of our beloved Ready or Not after this. I have so many mixed emotions….

What’s new with me? Well the biggest news is that I am starting a Grad program in September for a Master of Information at a University in Halifax, Nova Scotia. I am super excited about that. We won’t be moving until sometime next year, due to the pandemic being dumb here still, so I will be doing online classes for at least my fall semester. I am really ready for this change in my life, as I have wanted to get a Grad degree since I graduated Undergrad in 2014, it’s long overdue. I will be over 40 by the time I’m done (doing it part-time), but I am ok with that, as there is nothing at this point in my life holding me back from going for this.

Anyway, that’s mainly my big life update, so let’s get on with the review!

The episode opens with Amanda eating chicken soup as she has been sick with a cold for a couple days. Stephen’s son Gregory is visiting for the week since his mom and sister went to Florida and he doesn’t enjoy sand. Gregory is played by Robin Dunne, a Canadian actor whose been in a whole slew of different things, but the main thing I remember him from is Dawson’s Creek and Cruel Intentions 2 (yes I watched that movie for some reason).

Stephen is bragging about one of Gregory’s sets being featured in the newspapers, as apparently he’s a professional set designer. I guess he’s some sort of prodigy because he doesn’t look very old, maybe late high school/early Uni. Or perhaps some nepotism took place, since Stephen likely has some artist connections. Phyllis, not to be outdone by Stephen’s parental bragging, mentions that Amanda is also an artist/actress even though to date her only acting gig was playing a major weather event. The family has some pointless banter about how working in professional theatre is tough nowadays/it always was and blah blah. It’s boring. I need to add they are all eating Chinese food in this scene and it’s making me really want some! Finally they open their fortune cookies. Phyllis’ says “Happiness is within your grasp” obviously in reference to Stephen’s wallet. Amanda’s says “You are the type of person who enjoys small furry pets”. That’s not even a fortune. But it’s true, they often do say stupid shit like that. The family gets a hearty chuckle out of it, other than Amanda who looks distressed for some reason.

The next day at school Amanda is bragging to Busy about her step brother being a famous artist type who only wears black and is extremely deep. Black, how original for an artist. Busy points out that Phyllis and Stephen aren’t married yet so they technically aren’t related. Also, is anyone else kind of surprised Amanda doesn’t have a crush on her “step brother?” I mean, he’s pretty cute, but maybe that would’ve been too much for this show, haha.

As they are walking down the hall, Amanda notices some pamphlets for an arts camp called Dame Edith Kapila. I tried to see if this was a real thing, but it’s not. I don’t even think “Edith Kapila” was a real person, but I did a one second check on Google so feel free to correct me if I am wrong, people of the Internet.

Apparently this art’s camp is the bee’s knees, as it is highly competitive, and they give you a full scholarship if you get in. Amanda is pissed though, because the deadline is Friday, and she has been out sick most of the week with COVID so she had no time to prepare an application.

Monkey Ears and Carla come waltzing up looking like members of the Village People, with Carla telling Amanda not to get her hopes up, as this arts camp only takes twelve people a year from all of Canada. Carla apparently also got the role of Wendy in the school’s production of Peter Pan, which has boiled Amanda’s tatters. So now they are both in competition with each other for most mediocre actress of Dorsey Jr High.

ME and Carla scamper off, and then Amanda notices that some actor named Brad Born (I’m assuming a knock off Brad Pitt since he was big at this time in the 90’s) is going to be the Artist-in-residence at this camp since he graduated from the program years ago. Now Amanda has even more of an incentive to get into this program as man candy will be there.

A short scene outside has Carla doing a monologue from a Shakespeare play in front of some students. Apparently she’s really good according to Amanda, but I couldn’t tell. It’s not worth a screenshot.

The next scene Amanda is painting a pretty terrible portrait of Busy to try and get into the arts camp. Busy is like why are you painting if you want to do acting, and Amanda gives some lame reason saying she’ll just ask to transfer into the acting program. Amanda gives up as Busy looks like a two dimensional ghost. She tries to think of what other art thing she can half-ass to submit. Busy wanders over to some painting that Ernie did of flying cell phones. It’s weird, but way better than what Amanda has done thus far. Apparently he has been coming into school at 6am to work on it, so he definitely has put way more effort into this than she has.

Amanda then decides she should write and act out her own monologue, and starts reciting something off the top of her head. Busy’s face say it all in that it’s not very good. Why wouldn’t she just act out a monologue from the slew of existing movies/books/TV shows out there? I actually think getting into this arts camp as an actor would the be easiest route, because you don’t have to physically create anything, unlike all other forms of art. So I really don’t understand why Amanda didn’t just hyper focus on finding something to act out, but then I guess this episode wouldn’t exist if she had been so logical. Anyway, this scene basically points out that Amanda has slim to nil time to produce anything worthy of submitting to this arts camp. What’s a girl to do….

Well that will be answered in this scene. Gregory is working on a set for Romeo and Juliet for a production he’s part of. Amanda’s creepily watching him work. She notes how beautiful the set is, but Greg hates it for some reason, saying “it doesn’t feel right”. Amanda suggests painting the balcony pink, since it’s Juliet’s and in her gender role confirming eyes pink is feminine. Gregory says sure knock yourself out, and lets her add some pink paint on. He decides he still hates it and lets Amanda keep it since he plans on starting over.

So now Amanda has acquired a beautiful, professionally done model set, and she has a day left to submit to this arts camp. I really wonder what she’ll do with this convenient situation.

A short scene with Phyllis and Amanda walking down the street, with Phyllis telling her daughter back in her day they used their summers to be lazy and get high. Amanda informs her Boomer mom that nowadays if you don’t have an internship or something going on, by the time your Phyllis’ age you will basically be a homeless person. Amanda see’s a street perform playing the sax and gives him some change, I guess she feels bad and thinks he’s destitute or something?

Later at night, Busy and Amanda are on the phone, and Amanda’s complaining to Busy about this whole arts camp thing still. Busy is over it and says why can’t you just apply next year? Amanda says she’ll be behind in life if she doesn’t do it now, even though she didn’t know this stupid arts camp existed until a day ago, so why’s it so important now? She spirals on about how if she doesn’t get in she’ll never become an actress and will become a street performer or waitress and fail at life. Ummm, pretty sure a lot of actresses are also waitresses until they get their big break (if that ever even happens), so if she’s actually committed to acting she better get used to working jobs like that. They hang up and Amanda’s gaze turns towards Gregory’s set. She now starts thinking that she should submit it, using excuses like “we worked on it together” (lol you painted the balcony) and that it would be “just a foot in the door.” So yeah, she about to cheat her way into this program y’all. P.S. I had to get this screenshot of Amanda’s shirt. Does this not remind you of those old Columbia House flyers where you could get 10 CDs for one penny? (The olds will remember this).

I also had to get a full screenshot of the Romeo and Juliet set so you can see this is something Amanda definitely could not have created.

Two weeks later and we see Amanda and Busy at Amanda’s place about to leave for school. The phone rings, and Phyllis knocks over some flower pot and gets dirt everywhere, so she asks Amanda to answer it. Amanda does, and it’s the Kapila arts camp telling her she got acceptance! She starts shrieking her head off in her usual excited fashion and Phyllis asks what she ended up sending in. Amanda says she did a monologue and Busy you can tell is suspicious, because she saw Amanda’s attempt at a monologue before, and it was pretty shitty. They ask her when they can see the tape and Amanda says the camp has it, so not until August when she comes back. Busy is definitely not buying it though, and even asks Amanda to perform it now, but Amanda says she’s way too excited and they need to get their asses to school. It looks like so far Amanda is getting away with this little ruse….

At school Amanda is looking at Ernie, and already she’s feeling guilty about what she did because she knows Ernie actually tried and she did diddly squat and got in. Monkey Ears and Carla come up to her now looking like beatnik Yoko Ono’s. Actually Carla looks like she has one of those tear drop tats people get when they’ve killed someone, and I have no clue what Monkey Ears is going for with this look, Neo from The Matrix, maybe? They congratulate her on the acceptance, well Monkey does, Carla just acts salty and states that she heard Kapila sucks now because they had cutbacks in funding or some bs. Amanda just sticks her tongue out in response.

The lady teacher who was Amanda’s crush Andrew’s side chick, comes up to Amanda and also congratulates her on getting into Kapila. She tells her it’s cool she found her artistic vision with her set for Romeo and Juliet. Amanda’s like how tf do you know about that, and Ms Buttery tells her she has a friend on the Board of Directors at Kapila and how impressed they all were with Amanda’s submission. Now Amanda is like fuck what else does she know? The teacher asks Amanda if she’d consider making a set for a play about the Titanic that is being put on at the University club. She tells Ms Buttery she’ll think about it. You can tell by this screenshot that Amanda is dying inside with each passing minute, because she’s 100% fucked.

The next scene Amanda is at home and she’s attempted to create this Titanic set, and it’s exactly as you would expect it to look, i.e. like a kindergarten child created it. Gregory comes in and severely judges her design, as he should. But other than mocking Amanda, he actually has a reason for being there, his job wants the old Romeo and Juliet set he gave Amanda and he’s here to get it back. Amanda comes up with some crap about bringing it to school to show people and she will bring it home tomorrow. So yes, this whole situation is becoming a massive snowball of shit.

The next day in the cafeteria, the girls are in line for some grub when Busy notices that Amanda’s set is now at school. Remember though that Busy doesn’t know that Amanda lied about sending in a set, she told her she sent in a monologue. Busy’s like “Isn’t this like what your step brother does?” (Didn’t she say at the beginning of the episode they technically weren’t step siblings? Get some consistency, RoN writers), and Amanda’s like yeaaaah. Ms Buttery comes in and tells Amanda that Global TV is going to interview her. Now Busy is really like wtf…. how is this your model? I thought you submitted a monologue. Amanda’s like yeah I somehow had super human abilities and submitted both. Ok, at this point I’d be ‘fessing up to Busy that I lied about the whole thing so maybe she could help me figure a way out of this shit, OR I’d be grabbing that model, pulling a fire alarm, and running for the hills. But no, Amanda is still holding on to this situation that is rapidly getting out of control. P.S. Ignore the YTV promo in this screen shot , I wanted to get a shot of Amanda’s shifty eyes and Busy’s wtf face.

Welp, now it’s too late, because Ms Buttery is back, and she’s with the Global News reporter, who FYI was an actual reporter for that station at the time. We get a slow-mo shot of him walking forward to shake Amanda’s hand. Realizing now she literally has no where to run, she does what any cornered person might do, and uses her booty to solve the problem. She backs dat ass up, and crushes the poor set with her derriere.

The look of shock and disgust on Ms Buttery’s face is really hilarious to me. It reminds me of Phyllis at the art gallery with Busy. Damn these girls, not appreciating and destroying precious art.

Amanda arrives home with the damaged goods and presents it to a rightfully pissed off Gregory. She claims someone sat on it aka doesn’t even tell him it was her. He’s like what the hell is wrong with you? He walks off in a huff because hours of hard work are down the drain thanks to Amanda. Really, why didn’t she run off once she saw the set was back at Dorsey? She should of grabbed it and left, so at least Gregory could’ve gotten his work back. This episode is dumb.

Later on Busy and Amanda are out eating gelato, and Amanda starts asking Busy hypothetically what she would do if she wanted something more than anything but she had no chance of getting it. Ok, I’m sorry but Amanda didn’t even know about this stupid arts camp until she came back to school and only because she happened to walk by the pamphlets on the wall. We have never heard of Amanda ever talking about this Kapila camp until this episode. And if she means the acting stuff, she only just started wanting to do that shit this year. If anything, Busy is a much better example of this question because this did happen to Busy. She wanted to do music her whole life and be in a band, and she kind of had that dream shattered this year thanks to the Liz and the Neon Fuckheads.

Busy basically says that sometimes if you don’t get what you want something better might come along, but then on the other hand people (i.e. Amanda) often bend the rules to get what they want, but if they don’t hurt anyone it might not matter. Amanda tries to justify it saying that in ten years no one will probably even remember it. You can tell she’s definitely trying to have Busy validate what she did, but she still feels very guilty about how she got into the camp.

The next and last scene is Amanda sitting in front of a camcorder and confessing what she did in terms of lying and using Gregory’s set to scam her way into the camp to the actor aka Artist-in-residence, Brad Born. Why she’s telling a random actor and not the Board of Directors, I’m not sure. But anyway, she spills her guts and also says they should consider letting in someone like Ernie who actually did make an effort. After she’s finished, Gregory comes in asking Amanda if she has Popsicle sticks. He probably figured after seeing her child-like Titanic set that she keeps stuff like that handy. Amanda asks him if he could look at the tape and give his opinion when he has a chance, I guess she wants to come clean to everyone that she tried to be a dirty cheater.

The episode ends with Amanda laying back on her bed contemplating how shitty this past week has been.

Man this episode was a chore to get through! I was so bored by all this, and I really didn’t care. Never have I see so many lies and blunders since the A Little White Lie episode back in Season 2. Honestly though, had it not been for Ms Buttery knowing the lady on the Board of Directors at the camp, Amanda 100% would’ve gotten away with it. So the lesson is… cheating can pay off as long as no one you know is associated with whatever you are trying to scam your way into.

OH MY GOD. I FINISHED SEASON FOUR. Damn… we’re nearing the end, friends. Season Five is on like Donkey Kong. Next episode, Dom is back! But he’s got a secret. Stay tuned as we finally near the end of the road with Ready or Not Reviewed!

Season 4, Episode 12: Girls Night In

Hey hey hey. I can’t believe/can believe last time I updated this was September. I was scrolling Facebook and saw a big ol’ picture of Amanda and Busy’s mugs on the Retrontario Facebook page (highly recommend if you like looking at 80’s/90’s Canadian media) and realized I haven’t updated in ages. What’s new with me? I am still doing school upgrading, but now it’s for math which is frankly even worse than biology so it’s even more time consuming, working and generally trying to “better” myself. One of my dogs passed away in November which was extremely hard, I still miss her a lot. Thankfully I have another dog that I probably annoy with my constantly cuddling, but she has no choice but to accept my overwhelming love.

So now that I’ve gotten my usual slew of excuses for a late update out of the way, let’s get to what you all came here for:  Amanda and Busy watching an X-rated movie!

So I guess all wrongs have been made right, because it seems Amanda has gotten over the whole fiasco of the last episode as this one opens with the two girls having a convo on the phone. Amanda is staying over at Busy’s tonight and has a special treat for them. Some girl named Phoebe lent Amanda a sexy French video, so good it’s “unedited”. She asks Busy if the Ramone family will be out as to not ruin the viewing experience. Busy states yes they’ll be all out for various reasons and they should be fine to watch their foreign porno film.

Busy hangs up and we see that Sheila is cleaning up the entire kitchen and is acting a bit spacey. Lucy comes in looking for Bingo markers while Busy opens the fridge looking for baking soda that she needs to make lava for some volcano project. It seems like while cleaning, Sheila has also rearranged the entire kitchen, which annoys Busy (would also annoy me too ngl).

Manny comes in and tells Sheila to get a move on because they’re going to be late for pool night. Sheila tells Manny she’s feeling kinda tired and isn’t really in the mood to go out, which pisses off Busy as this is could jeopardize her and Amanda’s porn viewings. Busy is also acting weirdly bitchy to Sheila, as Busy mentions Amanda coming over and Sheila asks if they are over their fight to which Busy says “none of your god dang business”.  I think she has never gotten over Sheila making her be a bridesmaid and having to wear those heels. Manny tells Sheila to seriously go get ready, and Sheila is now the one getting mad, once again saying she’s friggin’ tired and doesn’t want to go to some shitty pool hall. She tells Manny she really needs to talk to him about something.

Manny starts to come around, whispering in Sheila’s ear that they could stay home and get freaky instead. Busy loses it, and tells them they are getting the hell out of the house, because she gets the place to herself once every millennia and they are not staying home to bang and ruin it for her.

Busy is now in her room, and Amanda knocks on the door. Busy says how happy she is that Amanda finally gave her a call, but judging by how quickly she got over the betrayal in A Little White Lie, i.e. by the end of it, it doesn’t seem like Amanda is one to really hold a grudge. Amanda asks if Busy is sure everyone is leaving to which Busy says they better if they know what’s good for them. Amanda whips out the video, and it’s about some French lovers  named Mimi and Phillip, and apparently it’s not even a porn as it’s only rated R. You can tell Busy was very disappointed by that lol, but it should still prove a steamy viewing experience.

Manny comes in and they manage to hide their smut in time before he see’s it. He asks Busy if she can give him his lucky pool shirt as I guess Sheila has 80,000 layers of clothing and Manny and has no room for his anymore and now uses Busy’s closet. Busy complains to Amanda about how Sheila is basically a diva taking over the house with her clothes. We hear the door shut and finally everyone is gone so we can get this party started. Unfortunately before they can begin the show they need to make the stupid volcano lava first.

They go into the kitchen and Busy is irritated because she can’t find anything due to Sheila moving all the stuff around. Busy decides to put the baking soda/food colouring/vinegar into a pressure cooker to cook the lava to make it faster? I dunno, even Amanda is like this seems like a stupid idea, but Busy seems confident…why, I do not know.

They finally settle in to watch the video, with Busy still bitching about Sheila. She basically hates that she has a schedule and does stuff with the Ramone family while Busy is ignored. Just as they begin watching they hear the door open and freak out. It’s a mad scramble to get the erotica off the screen before whoever has come home and ruined their night see’s it.

Anyway it’s Sheila, and she’s muttering to herself about Manny being an asshole and being tired and blah blah. Busy and Amanda approach her and you can tell Busy is none too pleased about her being back home. I don’t blame her, as it’s probably the first time since Sam came to Canada that the Ramone house has been empty. Actually wait, they went out during the Italian reunion episode, never mind. So Sheila waltzes into the living room asking what they had been up to. They make up some excuse, and then Sheila suggests they watch some Women’s Television Network TV movie, to which Busy says they have shit to do and leaves. P.S. Look at Sheila with the TV guide, would youth nowadays even know what this is? I feel old. 😦

Busy’s still complaining about Sheila ruining their evening, while Amanda’s stressed that Sheila is going to discover the tape and then tell everyone’s mom what they were doing. Busy agrees that Sheila would totally be a rat fink, and now they need to figure out a plan to distract her while they get the video tape back. They decide that Busy will distract her while Amanda gets the tape. I don’t really get why, because Amanda can at least be fake and pretend to like someone, Busy cannot hide her emotions and won’t be able to cover the fact she can’t stand Sheila. But that’s what they’re going with soooooo yeah.

Busy comes into the kitchen and asks Sheila some bs question about windows, but Sheila is already getting annoyed because she’s noticing Busy’s volcano shit is starting to mess up the kitchen she just cleaned. In the other room Amanda is trying to get Rendezvous in Paris out of Busy’s crappy VCR. It was noted earlier that tapes were getting stuck in there and she’s having issues trying to get it out.

In the background we can hear Sheila and Busy starting to get into an argument, with Sheila saying Busy’s mom wouldn’t be happy with this, while Busy tells her to mind her own goddamn business. Sheila starts cleaning up Busy’s stuff which makes Busy even get more angry. All the while Amanda is freaking out because she cannot get this effin’ video tape out of this VCR. They definitely should’ve switched roles for this little mission, as I’m sure Busy knows how to maneuver this stupid piece of crap VCR. Busy and Sheila’s argument is escalating more, with Busy telling Sheila she may have made Manny into a simp, but she’s not going to tell her what to do. Sheila starts turning off the stove where the lava was cooking, which has Busy switching it back on (much higher than the original setting it was on). They go back and forth a bit, and finally Busy tells Sheila ever since she moved in life at the Ramone house has sucked. Sheila gives her a hurt face and leaves, and you can tell Busy immediately feels bad, though she probably still meant every word she said. BTW Sheila’s face is all flashy here because a storm has been happening this entire episode, but it adds a nice little dramatic effect to the scene.

Later in Busy’s room Amanda is telling Busy to go apologize for being rude. Busy is over it with Sheila, but decides to go do it anyway. As they are leaving Busy’s room they see Sheila with a bag packed. Amanda freaks out and tells Busy to stop her from leaving. Sheila says she’s going to her mom’s house. Wow Busy really had that much of an effect on Sheila that she wants to leave? I would’ve just told Manny his sister was being a little mofo and have him deal with her later, like hell I’d leave the house I am living in.

Amanda tells Busy to get ready to be beaten by Manny, because she’s gone and broken up their marriage with this outburst. Lmao if Busy actually resulted in them getting divorced because of this one incident their marriage wasn’t that strong in the first place. Suddenly the lights go out as the storm has caused a power outage. Busy and Amanda go into the kitchen to look for candles when Sheila comes in looking like a wet dog. Turns out she can’t leave because the garage door opener won’t work. Sheila tries to call a cab but nothing is available because of the storm. They start lighting some candles with Busy still being rude to Sheila, so I guess she learned nothing in that incident that took place ten minutes earlier.

They sit around at the table and Amanda suggests they use an Ouija board or start telling ghost stories. Sheila starts telling one and then Busy cuts her off. Man, she is salty about not getting to watch the x-rated movie, geez. Suddenly we hear a cat outside, and it turns out Busy’s neighbour’s cat is out there in the rain. Amanda decides she’s going to attempt to bring him inside and tells Busy to make up with Sheila already. I don’t get what Busy is so mad about, yes it is annoying that Sheila kinda ruined their evening, but is it worth holding onto for this long? It’s clear Busy just hates that the Ramone’s pay attention to Sheila while Busy has been ignored her whole life. Maybe take that up with your neglectful family, Busy.

Amanda goes off to chase a cat in a thunderstorm while Sheila and Busy kinda stand there awkwardly.  Suddenly the phone rings and Busy and Sheila both run for it with Busy reaching it first. It turns out it’s Manny, and Busy gets all excited talking to him, but it’s clear he doesn’t care about Busy and just asks to talk to Sheila aka his damn wife. Why are you shocked by this, Busy? Sheila and Manny talk and they both apologize for their behaviour while the piano plays in the background and Busy looks guilty. I guess she realizes that Sheila isn’t some pest and is actually her brother’s wife who he loves a lot. As soon as Sheila hangs up the phone the lights come back on. All of a sudden we hear this hissing sound and I dunno why this part always makes me laugh. We see the volcano pot is about to explode and Sheila is just like “BUSY, GET DOWN!” As if they were in active combat. She even shields Busy from the oncoming explosion.

So yeah the pot explodes and literally coats the entire kitchen in red crap.

Sheila’s like fuck my life as she had just cleaned that kitchen mere hours ago. She starts the clean up effort but if I were her I would’ve been like to Busy, “sucks to be you, have fun cleaning that!” and went to my basement apartment. But no, Sheila’s a nicer person than me and starts scrubbing. Amanda comes back in soaked after chasing the cat around the yard. Did you really think you were going to catch that cat, Amanda? She’s simple sometimes. She asks what happened and Busy explains and tells her to start cleaning. They start goofing around a bit, but then suddenly Sheila takes a tumble aka faints.

Busy and Amanda rush over and Busy starts doing CPR while stating that she “killed Sheila.” Wow Busy you really think you have that much power over this woman? I guess in the panicking moment your brain would think something as insane as that. Sheila wakes up pretty quickly and Busy apologizes for being a jerk and causing her to faint. Sheila tells Busy she’s not the reason, it’s because she’s pregnant and that’s what she’s been trying to tell Manny all night.

A bit later Busy has finished cleaning up the kitchen (I’m assuming with Amanda), Sheila comes in and says she did an awesome job. She apologizes to Busy for being in her way since moving in and Busy tells her she just needs to get used to the idea of her being there, but she’s getting there and it won’t be so bad. Manny comes home and the girls kinda do that smirk when you know something the other person doesn’t. I think Sheila telling Busy first out of everyone, including Manny, made Busy feel special. She said earlier in the episode Sheila had all these things she did with the other Ramone’s aka playing chess with Frankie, listening to the radio with Sam, so now they have their “thing”; surviving a volcano explosion and learning that she’s pregnant before any of the others did.

Sheila tells Manny she’s pregnant and he gets really excited and spins her around, honestly it’s a pretty adorable reaction.

Later on Busy and Amanda are in Busy’s room talking about how it’s crazy Manny is going to be a dad and Busy an aunt. They talk about how cute a boy Manny would be (well Amanda does) and Busy states the house is getting smaller and smaller. At least they aren’t at Full House level of crampedness yet, but it’s getting there. Hopefully Manny and Sheila can get their own place before the spawn arrives, it’s the 90’s so housing prices aren’t stupid yet like they are now.

The girls hear faint music in the background and they jet out of bed because it’s the music from the tape. They peak around the corner and Lucy is all huddled up watching it on the couch. Well at least someone got to enjoy this video!

Busy and Amanda run back into Busy’s room and burst out laughing. The episode ends with them trying to decide who to blame on having the tape, with Manny and Sheila likely being the most realistic choice.

Okay I’m not going to lie, this episode was kind of disappointing to me. I feel like this could’ve been a similar episode to Am I Perverted, Or What?  but instead we get this boring mini drama with Sheila. Sheila’s pregnancy plot is also kind of a waste as it never even progresses after this episode. I don’t even think they show her with a preggers belly in Season 5. I honestly can’t remember, but we never end up hearing much about or seeing the baby at all.

I checked to see if Rendezvous in Paris is a real film, and it seems one exists from 1995, sadly no Mimi and Phillip in that one. I’m also pretty sure it’s not a softcore porn.

Anyway, that was fun. One episode left of Season 4, daaaamn. So close to the beginning of the end.

Next episode, Amanda steals someone’s art and tries to pass it off as her own.

Season 4, Episode 11: Warts and All

Hi everyone, how’s it going? Can you believe the summer is over? I just had my 37th bday two weeks ago, (aka September 14th cuz knowing me this could be posted in December). I’m so glad the weather has pretty much jumped almost straight into fall, which is my preferred season (yeah I’m a basic bitch, sorry I like pumpkin spice and hoodies).  I think it’s more I really dislike summer. My theory is most people like summer because they think back to when they were in school and getting months off for summer, because why the hell would anyone enjoy humidity?

Anyway, I’ve been working still, going to therapy and also working out semi-regularly and I started a high school biology course as I am hoping to go back to college next September. So yeah I’ve been busy and I definitely still have down days but I’m sure we all do considering the state of the world and such. But all we can do is keep trying to move forward.

You guys may also have noticed there are ads on the site now. I decided to try out a paid account at least for a year. I always wanted to see if I could ever make money from this site… well so far I’ve made a pretty penny…literally one penny haha. Well to me this site is more about my own enjoyment than profit, so I’m ok if things stay exactly as they are but if you do or have supported me anyway at all in the past or present I thank you. 🙂

Anyway, enough rambling! Let’s get on with the review.

The episode opens with Busy making a banner for a swimmer named “The Butterfly” who Amanda and Busy is a fan of, and who is retiring soon. Apparently he’s big in their district, but are highschool athletes really that big they have fans? Maybe it’s a thing, I don’t know, because sports in general mean little to me. Behind them, there are three girls who are clearly supposed to be snobs as they have really fake posh accents and are discussing various restaurants they’ve been to and hated in their lives. Amanda is kind of eavesdropping as you guys all know shes all about wanting to get in with the worst kinds of people. I guarantee you these girls are all named Caitlyn, Ashley or Meagan. I’m going off of my own high school experience where 98% of the female population in my grade had one of those names.

Nah, I heard one of them say a name and it was Diana but pronounced “Dee-ana” so you know they extra pretentious. Busy is still going on about the sign for The Butterfly, while Amanda continues spying on these girls, clearly looking for an in to interrupt their convo. Finally one of them mentions tiramisu and Amanda jumps on it, inserting herself into their inane conversation by mentioning she loves tiramisu and her cool ass loft has some sweet restaurants by it. The three girls inform Amanda they are starting a dinner club and trying new places each month. One of the girls mentions liking Amanda’s sweater which has her going on and on about her mom getting it in NYC where she went on a massive shopping spree and had backstage passes at some musical, all courtesy of rich Steven I’m sure. So it’s clear already Amanda is trying to impress these three randoms. Busy gets tired of hearing Amanda be fake and flicks her with the marker to shut her up.

This results in a marker fight with Amanda and Busy going to town on one another (sounds bad). Unfortunately a marker ends up going flying right in front of goddamn Clemmer. Of course he’s not having it, because this man hates seeing joy on the face of youths, and decides to give Busy and Busy only a detention. Man I feel like all the teachers in this school hate her.

Later on they’re in the washroom, and Busy is complaining that it’s bullshit that Amanda never gets in trouble and she always does. Amanda basically agrees with her.  Busy reminds Amanda to come over later to work on the banner for The Butterfly. Amanda is pretty meh about the whole thing, which Busy takes notice of and asks if she still wants to go. Amanda says she’s kind of losing interest in stuff like that to which Busy states well he is your favourite damn swimmer. Amanda says yeah when she was 12 (ummm you’re like 14 now, 12 wasn’t THAT long ago). Amanda agrees though and says she’ll make sure to come by and decorate it up. I think this was the first real inkling of a theme that will start to slowly emerge more and more in that Amanda begins to subconsciously pull away from the friendship and seems to want more independence, while Busy starts to become more clingy. It’s something that will definitely come up in future episodes but upon rewatching this episode I was “hmmm emoji”.

In the hallway  one of The Heathers (that’s just what I’m calling these three girls cuz I only know one name so far) stop Amanda and gives her their number. I guess that riveting 10 second conversation about tiramisu made them decide she’s worth talking to. Busy gives Amanda a major WTF look and asks why she’d want to hang out with those bimbos. Amanda as usual is open to befriending pretty much anyone and seems ok with branching out with these chicks. Busy asks if she’s actually going to call this girl and Amanda says probably not. It’s pretty obvious Busy is scared of losing Amanda’s friendship and is becoming a bit possessive with these new girls. But you know what, that’s pretty common in young female friendships. I definitely got jealous when my best friends met other people so it’s a pretty realistic portrayal. P.S. God bless Lani Billard’s facial expressions.

At Amanda’s house (I thought they were doing this at Busy’s?…meh) they are painting the poster and discussing Busy’s detention. Busy mentioned all the stupid weirdo things Clemmer does while in the classroom and then points out that Amanda has never had detention before because she’s so goddamn perfect and leads a perfect life with no problems. Amanda points out some really dumb ways she isn’t perfect, such as being bad at long jump and being afraid of heights. Busy rightfully rolls her eyes at these lame ass examples. Amanda decides to pull out the big guns and whips off her shoe/sock and shows Busy a gnarly plantar wart she has. Busy is grossed out but definitely tucks that little nugget of info into the back of her mind for later use.

The next day after gym Busy asks Amanda again about her toe fungus and Amanda tells her it’s getting bigger and she’s removing it soon, but she can’t take a shower because it’s contagious. The Heathers stop by on their way to the shower and ask Amanda why she isn’t joining them. Busy saves her ass by using the excuse that she’s wearing contacts and the water will knock them out of her eyes. (FYI you can shower with contacts I’ve done it millions of times). The Heathers ask Amanda what she is doing tonight and invite her to their first dinner club meeting. Amanda of course says yes and Busy is like “wtf we’re going to the swim meet tonight.” Amanda states Busy was also clearly invited (even though she clearly wasn’t, as the girls were blatantly ignoring her the whole time), and that they’ll have fun at the dinner club meeting. Busy is just like OK, sis.

After school Amanda comes up to The Heathers and lets them know she and Busy are very excited about the dinner club thing tonight. By their expressions you can tell they are none too pleased that Busy is coming along. I don’t know how Amanda cannot read these social cues. They basically say they didn’t think Busy would be into this type of thing, which I think is a fair assumption. I mean, these girls are obviously snobby and do probably see Busy as a poor provincial soul, but Amanda should know Busy well enough that she wouldn’t dig going to some pretentious restaurant. But no, Amanda is clueless as ever and says that Busy will love it because it’s an Italian restaurant and because there is pasta Busy will be all about dat. The girls kind of accept their fate that Busy Ramone will be crashing their club tonight.

At the restaurant it’s clear The Heathers are doing all they can to make Busy’s time there not fun, starting with “forgetting to change the reservation” so she has to stand around waiting for a chair for awhile. While looking over the menu the girl’s stumble over some Italian food names/what’s in the dishes and Busy politely corrects them. This causes the betches to roll their eyes and just be over it with Busy even though she wasn’t being her usual rude Busy self at all. So I feel important to mention this next part because it has stayed with me me all my life. Busy mentions how there’s a bunch of different forks and one of the girl’s says “an easy way to remember is to start on the outside and work your way in” and that stuck with me til now hahaha. Legit when I’ve been on a cruise or a restaurant with more than one fork I go back to this wise sage’s advice. So thanks random girl from Ready or Not whose name I still don’t know, because that info was useful.

Amanda leaves to use the can and Busy is now alone with the ghouls who start full on ignoring her now. She decides to leave this awkwardness and go find a new fork. As soon as she gets up they start bad mouthing her, basically saying it’s bizarre they are friends and that Busy should be super embarrassed that she begged Amanda to let her tag along. Busy of course hears all of this. As soon as Busy returns they start a new fake convo about Amanda saying how she has amazing hair/skin etc and that she’s likely never had a pimple ever. Busy scoffs and is like umm ok she’s had a lot worse. The convo starts spiraling at that point as the girls grill Busy for more info, with Busy finally saying she has a contagious wart. The Heathers full on start freaking out about it. You can tell Busy did not mean to let it go as far as it did, and these girls are honestly acting like Busy said she has genital warts (maybe they do think that because Busy never specified where the wart was). They go so far as to think she has ring worm and borderline start hyperventilating.

Poor Amanda comes back minutes later, with no idea the damage that Busy has caused with her big mouth. The Heathers immediately start acting weird around her, which Amanda tries to ignore at first. Some bread and oil comes out and Amanda dips her piece in. The girls then act like she’s time traveler from the year 2020, and has contracted a then unknown virus called COVID-19, and immediately pull away from dipping their own bread in. Honestly surprised they didn’t pull out face masks or hand sanitizer at this point.

So Amanda definitely noticed them acting weird when they did that, even she’s not that socially inept. She mentions how she’s excited to try sushi next month (because they were talking about it before) and The Heathers were like “mmm yeah, no gotta avoid parasites”, and continue to full on ignore Amanda in the same manner they treated Busy. Amanda is entirely befuddled by their actions.

Later on while walking home Amanda is like why the heck were they being so weird to me, did I say something really stupid? Busy of course keeps playing dumb and was like nope you are imaging things. She certainly was not, those girls didn’t even attempt to be slightly normal around Amanda. I’d be paranoid too.

A short scene in the hallway the next day and Amanda see The Heathers and goes to say hi and they are full on ignoring her now, don’t even attempt to be fake friendly. Amanda of course is crushed by this, why I am not sure because she’s literally been “friends” with these chicks for two seconds. But you know Amanda, always worrying about fitting in with the worst of the worst.

Now here comes the most humiliating experience for a high school kid, or so TV/movies would have me believe. In gym class the teacher tells them to divide into two teams and of course two of The Heathers are team captains. As we go down the line we see more and more girls get chosen before Amanda, they even pick friggin’ Busy, who they  have openly hated on a daily basis. So poor Zimm is the last one left to be picked. Man you think she had the bubonic plague or something.

Later on in the bathroom (I feel like so many events take place in the school bathroom at this school), you can tell Amanda’s pretty bummed about the continued snubbing by The Heathers. Busy reminds Amanda today is the last day to see The Butterfly swim and Amanda really doesn’t care as she’s too sad about not being friends with these girls. Busy starts getting mighty irate because she can’t understand Amanda’s need to be friends with these girls. Amanda figures if she talks to them she can figure out why they are treating her like shit. Busy says that’s not a good idea, mostly because she knows her ass is about to be toast. Amanda keeps pestering Busy to fess up as to why these betches are ignoring her, as Busy attempts to flee her in the hallway.

Finally Busy tells Amanda the truth about the wart stuff and of course Amanda is fucking pissed. She states that Busy did it on purpose to turn them against her which Busy denies, but I dunno y’all…. I think Busy could’ve stopped herself or made up some lie when it was happening. I think Busy kind of did want to make Amanda look bad, especially since this whole episode has been on and on about how Amanda leads this super charmed life. But anyway, Amanda storms off in anger at what dum dum Busy did.

Later on we see Amanda at home and Busy keeps calling and Amanda is hanging up/ignoring. She must have her own phone line cuz I feel like Phyllis would lose her shit over hearing the phone ringing non-stop. The scene shifts to Busy’s house and she’s sitting glumly on her bed with The Butterfly banner her and Amanda made. Frankie comes in and is being rude, but then notices that Busy looks super sad. He asks why and Busy says “did you ever do something to hurt someone, not really on purpose but kind of?” so yes, she definitely spilled the beans on the wart on purpose. To be honest, I can kind of see it from Busy’s point of view, it would be hard to be friend’s with someone like Amanda, someone who is pretty, makes friends easily, never gets in trouble etc. etc. so yeah, maybe the bad/human side of her wanted to see a tiny shitty thing happen to her. Unfortunately it definitely did not end up being worth the fall out. Busy tells Frankie she messed up and hurt Amanda and Frankie says she will probably get over it and there’s more than one way to say you are sorry. Awww I wish Frankie and Amanda were still dating…hahahaha I will never get over that lost opportunity. OMG I hope the reboot has it so they somehow got married or they end up hooking up again! ANYWAY… continuing on…

The next day Busy tries to apologize to Amanda, but she is still not having it. Later on we see Amanda sitting alone on a bleacher eating lunch and The Heathers are walking around complaining about the differences between Belgian and Swiss chocolate (I love how stereotypical snobby the show made them). Busy comes up to them and basically takes one for the team aka Amanda saying she lied about the warts and it was actually her who has them and that Amanda is an awesome person who likes their asses for reasons she can’t figure out. Honestly when push comes to shove, Busy is an amazing friend, and this is not something I think most people would be willing to do. The episode ends with The Heathers wandering over to Amanda to be pretend to be super fake nice with her again and Busy hoping to God that throwing herself on the sword saved their friendship. Amanda was in clear view of all this happening FYI so hopefully she puts two and two together and see’s what Busy did for their friendship.

I really liked this episode, to me it put Busy is a really human light. She did something I think a lot of teenage girls would’ve done, in terms of maybe putting someone down to make yourself feel better, but in the end it almost cost her their friendship (spoiler alert they are all BFF’s again by the next episode). She swallowed her pride and even though she couldn’t understand why, she still fixed things with The Heathers and Amanda.

Next episode (2nd last of season 4…holy crap finally!) Amanda and Busy try to watch a soft core porn while Sheila gets in the way.

P.S. I updated my “About” page as I don’t look like that anymore and sadly I haven’t been 32 for many a year.

 

Season 4, Episode 10: Heroes

First off before I start anything, I’d like to thank Sarah S for donating to the blog. You are amazing, and during these crazy times it is very appreciated, thank you so much. ❤

Hey everyone…. damn what the fresh hell is 2020 even. I hope you guys are all handling everything ok and are staying safe. I’m currently not doing too badly, I am working from home which I feel better about as it feels safer. Unfortunately I work in an industry hard hit by COVID-19 (travel insurance), but as of now I still have a job and will hopefully be keeping that job into the future. It’s really hard to know when things will even remotely go back to normal, but I’m pretty much an introvert and homebody, so staying inside isn’t a big change for me. Plus now that I heard killer hornets are the newest addition to the 2020 crapshoot so I definitely won’t be going out.

I realize I could (and should) be updating this site much more often, as I really have no excuse whatsoever other than I play video games too much and that eats up a lot of my time. Well without further adieu, let’s get started on Heroes.

So this episode is up there with Season 2’s, Monkey See, Monkey Do in that I always skip it when I rewatch of this show. I remember the first time seeing it finding it a really boring, and all I remember is Busy feeling uncomfortable around a dude in a wheelchair. So let’s go forward and see if I end up changing my mind and liking it a bit more seeing it 20 years later.

The episode opens with Busy bitching about Sam and how she’s his new target because Lucy grew a backbone and now has a new life as a student and is far too busy studying to take his crap anymore. They continue having small talk when Busy mentions something related to a farm which has Amanda remembering she left her mom’s sweater in gym yesterday (I guess sheep = wool = sweater). She decides to give Busy her food for some reason and jets off towards the gym. If I was Busy I’d be pretty annoyed at being given her garbage, what is she her damn personal assistant? Doesn’t matter because 0.2 seconds later some dude runs by and knocks all the food/books out of Busy’s hand. We then see two shiny wheels that roll up and a hand reaches to help Busy pick up her crap.

Turns out this new student’s name is Derek Wheeler, but he goes by Wheels on account of his last name/his wheelchair. Nah his name is Aiden and yes he is a new student. He asks Busy where the elevator is, and Busy gives some rushed answer as she’s clearly worried about being late for class. Aiden is still like yeah… no idea what you are saying and Busy decides it is just easier to show him.

So naturally Busy is late for class, and the damn teacher doesn’t even give her a chance to explain why and instead gives her detention during lunch. All the teachers at Dorsey with the exception of the art teacher Amanda loved seem like huge assholes. One second later Aiden rolls in, and we hear the teacher introduce him to the class. Busy is now lacking a science partner because the teacher assigned new ones and it’s two guesses who her new one is going to be. Actually at first the teacher asks some girl in the front to move to the back, but Aiden says he’s ok taking the back seat, much to Busy’s annoyance for some reason.

At lunch Busy is acting all awkward, saying to Sag that it’s weird how Aiden moves around. WTF is he supposed to float around like Professor Xavier or something? Sag is like the hell are you talking about. Naturally Amanda is the welcome wagon, and has Aiden sitting at the table with them for lunch. Amanda tries to bring up small talk, stating how Aiden likes sports to which Sag states he can’t relate because he is uncoordinated. Busy gives him a kick under the table for that which makes no sense but I guess to her that sentence = related to being in a wheelchair, I’m not sure. She also keeps nervously looking around and seeing people talk and look at the group, so it’s evident she’s extremely uncomfortable with his disability. Honestly, was this a thing in the 90’s? Being weirded out by people in wheelchairs/with disablities? Basically anything the group says to Aiden, Busy gets annoyed about. Thankfully her awkwardness ends quickly as she has to leave to go clean the science room for her detention.

Later on, Busy is finally finished her cleaning duties and is about to leave the room, but see’s Aiden wheeling down the hall. She quickly ducks inside so he can’t see her and say hi to her again(seriously, his dialogue has mainly consisted of him saying “hi” about six times, give him some decent lines Ready or Not writers).

Later on in the eve, Amanda and Busy are chatting on the phone and Busy is going on about how annoyed she is that Amanda tried to force Aiden’s friendship onto her. She once again mentions him being in a wheelchair as like a huge negative against him…. has Busy literally never seen someone in a wheelchair before? It’s highly bizarre how reactionary she is to this guy’s existence. Sam comes in and starts bitching at Busy because she’s sucking at making dinner and for some reason that’s really making him irate. Sam takes his damn food seriously. Seems like all the Ramone’s are in a pretty sour mood for some reason. Amanda and Busy end their phone convo unresolved on the Aiden non-issue.

Next day in science class the students are all doing some experiment with a pink chemical. Aiden and Busy are talking about an upcoming field trip to a lake while working on the assignment. Amanda turns around to ask for a pen and knocks the fake chemical all over the damn floor. The teacher borderline freaks out on Aiden, blaming his wheelchair for the spill, even though it’s clear he hasn’t moved an inch at all and Amanda’s standing in the delicious chemical sludge. The teacher then yells at them not to touch anything or move lest they “break their necks”. Yikes on that choice of words, sir. Anyway, the teacher is totally being condescending/babying Aiden when he had zero to do with the spill. For some reason this also prompts Busy to whisper to Amanda that she wished she was working with her even though Amanda’s dumb ass was the one that caused the biohazard.

Later on Amanda and Busy are checking the list of stuff they need to bring on the field trip. Aiden wheels on over which of course annoys Busy. She’s not even trying to hide how much she hates this guy. Amanda asks him how he likes Dorsey and he says it’s fine but he wants to make some friends. Amanda then invites him to a movie entitled Heroes with herself and Busy. Aiden agrees, and then not even a second later Amanda conveniently remembers she has a dentist appointment today and also can’t go the next day because she’s babysitting. So now the only person Aiden and Busy liked is bailing, but they both awkwardly agree to keep the movie date.

Next scene we see Aiden in line at what I’m pretty sure is the old Uptown movie theatre in downtown Toronto that closed in like 2003. I remember seeing The Matrix at this movie theatre when I was around 16. They go into the theatre and Aiden has to sit at the back because that’s the only spot his wheelchair will fit. Busy kinda makes a remark, and Aiden says if her vision is up not to par than she can move her ass on up, but she remains where she is. They start discussing the movie Heroes and the people in it (sadly no David Bowie). Apparently there’s a famous basketball player who Busy is super excited about, but Aiden asks how the hell being able to play sports and earn tons of money makes you a hero. He states that someone who risks their life to save someone if they didn’t have to is more of a hero, while Busy states because the basketball player is a role model that makes him a hero. I think they both are sort of right in a way, but I’m leaning more towards agreeing with Aiden.

Their argument gets so heated that the people in front tell them to shut their goddamn yaps.

The next day Amanda’s hanging at Busy’s house and Busy is bitching about how annoying and opinionated Aiden is. Amanda apologizes for bailing which has Busy stating she thinks she did it on purpose lol. Amanda said her mouth had to be drilled for a cavity to which Busy says she’d rather deal with a cavity then Aiden. She lists off all the annoying shit she had to deal with while hanging out with him like sitting at the back, having to find a wheelchair accessible bathroom at a restaurant because the theatre didnt’ have one, him spilling a drink etc. etc. Amanda then says yeah you hag, he has to deal with that forever you had to deal with it for two hours so stop being a bitch. I dunno why that gives Busy some epiphany because Amanda’s sentence made her like suddenly realize….YES disabled people do have it much harder than us. I swear Busy is such a simpleton at times.

That night Busy gets up in the middle of the night because she can’t sleep on account of feeling badly at treating Aiden like trash. Manny’s sleeping on the couch because Shelia apparently has restless leg syndrome and keeps him up all night. He wakes up and they start having a heart to heart talk about Busy feeling shitty. She doesn’t come out and say exactly what happened, but just states she is sometimes a moron and treats certain people differently. Yeah and for some reason they are arm wrestling during all this.

Next day Busy is at school shooting baskets and we see Aiden is watching a couple dudes playing basketball as well. The ball rolls over to Aiden and he picks it up and three points it from a great distance which impresses Busy. Inside the school, Busy comes up to Aiden at his locker and notices he has a picture of himself standing holding a basketball as apparently he was MVP before he got into an accident. Busy is surprised that Aiden still plays basketball. I guess she’s never heard of the Special Olympics before as she seems shocked that someone in a wheelchair could still participate in sports.

In class the teacher is handing out the permission slips for the field trip and bypasses Aiden because apparently the site is not equipped to meet his needs and they had booked the trip before he joined the class. Aiden is of course pissed at this. The teacher is very whatever about it, not even slightly empathetic to Aiden’s situation. Busy decides she’s had enough of this ableism bullshit, especially since she hung out with Aiden and has seen the dude is capable of taking of himself and dealing with situations. She stands up and says she’s not going on the field trip if they all can’t go and that if the site can’t accommodate Aiden they should look elsewhere. The teacher starts getting annoyed that she’s standing up for this just cause and tells her to sit down and shut up. Busy then calls his ass ignorant which of course lands her with a detention. But it’s pretty interesting to see Busy go from hating Aiden to being his number 1 supporter. I am kind of surprised Amanda didn’t also stand up with Busy since she was the one who opened Busy’s eyes about how much harder Aiden’s life is.

Later on Busy is waiting in the hallway to hear her punishment and we see Sam coming up the stairs and he looks hella pissed. He approaches Busy and you think he’s about to ream her ass since this whole episode he’s been giving her a really hard time, but he tells her she did the right thing and that he’s proud of her. Wow, Sam has come a long way since his racist ways of season 2, glad he cares about issues beyond his butcher shop now. Sam goes into the office to give the teacher a piece of his damn mind.

Aiden comes by and asks Busy if she feels like shooting some hoops after her verdict is determined. She says she’s kinda rusty but sure. Aiden brings up the movie and how he thinks Busy is wrong because the basketball player isn’t a hero but some guy that survived a plane crash is because he had courage. I’m assuming that’s some commentary basically saying that Aiden doesn’t consider himself a hero for what he goes through daily, but Busy is because she had the courage to speak up in the face of injustice. Really I think I’m the true hero for getting through this snoozefest of an episode.

I think it would’ve been a lot more interesting if Busy didn’t like Aiden because of his personality (because I thought his personality was pretty lame) and everyone thought it was because he was in a wheelchair but it turned out to be never about that and Busy saw Aiden as a person beyond someone just in a wheelchair. But I guess the show had to tick off “disabilities” from it’s list of issues covered. I’m actually kind of surprised they waited til this long in the show to do that since the first couple of seasons was all about making sure they covered a variety of issues. Of course Aiden as a character is never seen again as he has served his purpose and is now rendered pointless. I actually find that a lot more insulting to disabled people. I’m glad shows like Degrassi featured characters in wheelchairs and treated them like human beings i.e. Maya in the original and Jimmy in the later series.

Next episode, Amanda wants to be friends with the popular snobby girls, but Busy may jeopardize that by revealing a secret of Amanda’s.

This review is dedicated to Julie Nichols-Clements. I miss you friend.

Season 4, Episode 9: First Serious Party

Hello and Happy (belated belated belated) New Year! I know it’s March, but I’ve been writing this since late January, so it’s the new year to me, aiight?! I hope 2020 is treating everyone ok. I feel like world is sorta imploding with various events, and viruses and whatnot, so lets’ keep it light and simple with a good ol’ R or N review, shall we?

The episode opens with Amanda telling Busy that Stephen and Phyllis are going to LA for the weekend because he is a jingle writer and needs to be there for some reason. How does Phyllis manage to nab all these rich artist types? She must let them do butt stuff or something. But anyway, Nina is lurking about and says Amanda has to be a total square not to immediately think to have a party at Stephen’s loft. Amanda states that if so much as a dust particle is seen out of place by Stephen he will cane Amanda’s backside without haste.

As they are discussing this, two dudes who look EXACTLY THE SAME BUT AREN’T TWINS walk in. They’re both named Trevor and they both have leather jackets on, only difference is one has a red shirt and one has a blue shirt. Amanda and Nina appear to be drooling over them, and even Busy is like you legit can’t tell the difference between them. Ok you sorta can, I think the red shirt one is a ginger, but the point is, they are both pretty generic, and according to Busy not the brightest bulbs in the porch light.

Amanda looks like she’s doing some creepy wolf whistle, but she’s mostly just talking about how she thinks they are sensitive. I swear that’s her go-to adjective to describe guys she likes.

Nina says that if Amanda really wants to get to know Trevor x2 she should throw the loft party. This episode is full of lurkers as now Carla is is behind the girls wearing quite possibly the most 90’s ensemble I’ve ever seen. I know the 90’s are making a comeback, but have teddy bear backpacks made a return? I think I actually had the exact same one as her, I just legit never used it, only bought it cuz it was trendy lol. Anyway, Carla inserts her non-asked-for opinion, and states only losers would go to Amanda’s party. The girls tell her to fuck off, but you can see now this whole party idea is brewing in Amanda’s poofy little brain and within seconds she declares that Friday night she will be throwing a bash.

The next scene is at Stephen’s loft, which is also Amanda and Phyllis’ new pad. Phyllis is wasting no time getting all her shit unpacked and settling right now. Might I say, it must’ve been clear to Phyllis early in the relationship that things with SMEL weren’t going to work, as it never seemed like she ever wanted to move in with him. Meanwhile her and Stephen have been dating probably a couple months and she’s already planting her roots. There was really no point to that observation, but anyway, continuing on… Stephen is practising a jingle of some sort which irritating the crap out of Amanda who is attempting to do homework.

We then see Stephen flossing the frickin’ keyboard… not sure if this is a common thing keyboard players do, but I guess it’s to show that Stephen is super anal retentive with his equipment which will matter later on.

Amanda goes into her room and calls Busy to discuss the party and how she’s obsessed with making sure Trevor Part 1 gets invited. Phyllis comes in to chat which irritates Amanda some more. I don’t even really know the point of this conversation is, other than Phyllis’ making sure Amanda is kept in line and won’t be repeating what happened last time she went out of town with her boyfriend.

Well I hate to break it to you Phyllis, but this time isn’t shaping up to be any better than the last.

Stephen interrupts for some reason and mentions to Amanda to be careful with his keyboard/stereo while they are gone. They eventually peace out and Amanda tells Busy that Sag needs to check out the keyboard when they get to the party. So you know she gives approximately zero fucks about making sure Stephen’s shit isn’t touched.

The next day at school Amanda is handing out glittery home-made invites to her party, this seems like a throw-back to the first party she ever threw. She gives one to Sag who acts a bit weird because of his whole thing with Busy. Get over it Sag, no one cares anymore. Monkey Ears manages to wrangle an invite thanks to Nina. Suddenly The Outsiders walk by, and Amanda and Nina zoom down the hall to catch up to them as getting Trevor #1 an invite is the mission of the day.

The dudes say they will attend if there is any “liquid” aka alcohol. Nina decides to just write “free booze” on the invite to which Amanda is like wtf how are we supposed to get this, we aren’t even of age. But Nina has an ace up her sleeve.

That ace being having Amanda dress up as some weird Scandinavian named Helga Umlaut (yes, like that little symbol above German words) and using a fake ID to score some booze. Amanda points out how irritating it is that this is all Nina’s dumb idea, but yet she’s not even doing it. I hate these types of friends, they are always coming up with the dumbest shit, but they are never the ones actually doing the awkward aspects of their ideas.

Anyway, Busy and Amanda kind of wander around the liqour store, looking for alcoholic beverages to buy. They pick up a bottle of rosé and remark at how expensive it is at $6. The fuck? Like what was the price of wine in the 90’s? Cuz to me a $6 bottle of wine is pretty dope.

They decide on what they should’ve just went with in the first place, which is beer. Amanda grabs a couple of cases and you can tell right off the bat this store clerk is not buying this at all. I don’t blame him, because Amanda legit looks like she’s about to commit Russian espionage with her kerchief and glasses get up. Nina even says before they go in that she got busted before, so like why didn’t she make an effort to make Amanda look somewhat adult? She definitely could’ve pulled off looking 19 wearing like a blazer and some sophisticated glasses.

So the clerk ends up busting her on a really stupid question and her beers are swiftly confiscated. Probably didn’t help that Busy was in the store with her and definitely looks like a teen. Wow these girls are dumb.

So anyway, they now have no choice but to go to plan B, which is buying non-alcoholic beer. Amanda thinks this idea is stupid as hell, but Nina believes that the good ol’ placebo effect will take place, meaning that they will believe it is booze because they want to believe it is booze. Here’s hoping Trevor 2x are as dumb as they look. Amanda says everyone will be able to read the label saying non-alcoholic, so Busy offers up an old keg of Manny’s to hide the truth of the beer.

The next scene has Phyllis and Stephen getting ready to head to the airport/LA for the weekend. As soon as they go Nina and Busy come in with snacks/ the keg in hand. They start filling the keg, while trying the beer and talking about how disgusting it is. I can understand, because when I was a teen I was all about dat Mike’s Hard Lemonade. It wasn’t until I was in my 20’s did I appreciate beer. But I am sure this fake shit they bought really does taste like Frankie’s socks (Busy’s description).

All of a sudden the door is heard opening, and Phyllis and Stephen are back because Phyllis forgot her diaphragm aka the plane tickets.  The girls hussle and manage to get all the beer hidden. Phyllis comes in and notes the kitchen smells like a locker room… damn that is some rank beer. Stephen finds the tickets and the elders finally get the hell out. So now our party can commence.

So next scene the party is under way and it seems like a groovy time. Amanda is being a good hostess handing out fake beer to all her guests. I also want you guys to note this dude in the purple shirt. The music is really chill, and this idiot is dancing around like he’s got squirrels up his ass. Anyway, I wanted to note it cuz it will matter later. Also Busy and Sag have an awkward hi from across the room. Omg friggin’ get over it, you two were the lamest couple on this show. Nina and Amanda are all pumped because they expect their Trevors to be arriving soon.

The doorbell rings and they scamper all excited to answer it. Unfortunately for them it’s just Carla and and Monkey Ears. I love how she dissed the party but of course showed up, as if Carla had anything better to do, everyone hates her.

Busy and Sag start finally having some small talk, and we see purple shirt knock over a chair…. prelude to bigger things soon. Sag notes that he must be pretty drunk, to which Busy replies not possible.

Finally Trevor comes and he’s brought about 50 extra people with him. Amanda’s starting to feel stressed out at all these randos, but Nina is just like the more the merrier, and hands Trevor a fake beer and moseys inside with him. She’s such an opportunistic little betch.

The Jets conjugate around the keg and start chugging. Amanda wonders to Nina if they’ll notice it’s fake, but of course they don’t. One person does notice, and that’s Monkey Ears. He points out the the beer tastes weak AF. Blue shirt Trevor basically tells him to fuck off because how would he know. They wander off with Nina, and Amanda notices the keg is getting mighty low. You can tell she’s really starting to get over this whole hostess thing as it’s mostly just picking up after people and refilling the keg. Amanda even asks Nina to help her and she tells her to “relax.” At this point I’d be mighty ready to back hand slap this girl. Considering this party was her idea she’s reaping all the benefits while putting in slim to nil work.

Busy and Sag fool around with the keyboard a bit and end up accidentally playing Stephen’s jingle much to the chagrin of the youths at the party. Honestly though, it’s probably better than listening to another one of Busy and Sag’s songs.

Amanda finally gets two seconds to sit with Trevor alone. He’s pretty simple in that he comments that her hair is nice, and then proceeds to chug his beer in under 5 seconds… what a keeper. He then immediately proceeds to ask Amanda if there’s another keg around. She glumly goes off to resume refilling it. This episode really made me never want to host a party as a teenager.

Amanda gets beer on her jacket and goes to change walking in on Carla and Monkey Ears doing God knows what in her bedroom. It’s weird because ME is acting drunk, but he’s the one who called out that the beer was fake as hell, so I’m not sure if he’s like fuck it and is giving in to the placebo effect or maybe they brought their own edibles? I dunno, either way, Amanda is like da faq and kicks them out. Honestly at least they weren’t having sex, because then Amanda would have had to take a blow torch to the room.

Amanda brings out a new keg and the party seems like it’s getting a bit rowdier, aka people drinking out of vases, there’s a dude behind Busy and Sag writing on a glass wall, etc. Speaking of which, Busy and Sag seem like they are slowly starting to jam together as they are still experimenting on the keyboard. Just as Amanda’s announcing them to the crowd, Monkey Ears “pukes” on the ground. Amanda goes off to clean it up, but it’s one of his stupid fake joke things. Carla’s like the perfect girl for Monkey because she thinks every single idiotic thing he does is hilarious. It’s pretty sad that these two have been the strongest couple on the show by far.

Alright so remember when I told you guys to keep an eye on that stupid purple shirt dancing guy? Well he’s gone and done it now, because rhythm is a fucking dancer, and this moron smashes right into Busy, causing her to knock over the holy grail known as Stephen’s keyboard. Oh and you can see those guys drawing in the background. Amanda’s bout ready to lose her shit.

Amanda catches Nina on the lap of Blue Shirt Trevor flirting it up, which pisses her right off. She goes over to her and is like wtf are you doing, that’s my tail. Nina tells her she thought she liked Red Shirt Trevor, to which she’s like, “uhh no HUNNY”. I call shade, because Nina could clearly see that Amanda was constantly drooling over this dude, so she obviously just wanted to get her claws into him herself. Considering Amanda has to deal with the hell that is this party, Nina should back off and at least let her hook up with Blue Shirt Trevor. But it’s pretty clear Nina is a selfish and self-centered person.

Also Sag tries and fails to get the keyboard working again.

Well all hell is about to break lose, as Blue Shirt Trevor goes to the keg and see’s that it’s empty. He finds the stash of fake beer under the sink and is in shock and extremely irate that this is what they’ve been consuming this whole time. Monkey Ears takes delight in being smarter than a guy whose IQ is about equivalent to a rake, and mocks Trevor stating once again that he knew the beer was fake. Trevor can’t stands that and sprays Monkey Ears in the face with a can of beer. Monkey Ears throws some cheetos in Trevor’s face and gets the ball rolling on the oncoming destruction.

So now everyone decides it’s a swell time to totally trash Amanda’s house and guess whose in the middle of it all but fucking Nina. Yes, this stupid hoe decides it’s ok to run around and totally wreck the shit out of her friend’s house. She even knocks over Phyllis’ favourite vase on purpose. The worst part is she can’t even use being drunk as an excuse! She’s trashing her friend’s house completely sober. I swear if I was Amanda this girl would not be walking the next day. So yeah, now everyone is going completely ape shit and there’s no getting them under control. Busy tells Amanda it’s time to call the cops, to which Carla overhears and tells everyone they need to run for the hills. Nina runs out with Trevor and calls Amanda a trip for calling the police. What a bitch.

Anyway, considering none of these people were actually drunk, they totally demolished her house…. and the keyboard is still broken. Things are not looking good for our friend Amanda.

That Monday at school, Amanda is telling Busy that Phyllis and Stephen haven’t spoken to her since they got back. It seems like the worst thing that happened was the keyboard, but it was only a patch cord or something that was wrecked so it’s still fixable. Either way, Amanda’s grounded for the rest of her natural born life as a result of this party.

They see Nina in the halls and immediately shun her as they should. So yeah, that’s the end of Nina. Good riddance.

They then see Blue Shirt Trevor and he tells Amanda the party was awesome and asks her out. Amanda replies she doesn’t date complete dumbasses and walks off with Busy. The episode ends with the girls just randomly talking about stuff, the main one being Sag and Busy getting back together to jam (and no one cares).

Anyway, I liked this episode a lot, it was the closest this show will ever get to a “teen drinking” concept, and the party goers basically ended up acting like how drunk teens would in that situation anyway.

I just wanna say thanks to everyone who leaves nice comments on here, it’s really awesome to read things and see that people are still enjoying the content, even though I’m not the best at updating this consistently. Also special hello to Matt Moore aka Emma/Emory who left a comment on “The Big Gulp” episode. It’s really awesome to see people who were on the show reading this blog.

Next episode, Busy feels weird around a guy in a wheelchair. I’ll try to update again before summer. 😉

Season 4, Episode 8: Family Album

I need to give a shout out and a huge thank you to Jay G who donated $10.00 to this website last week. I’ve never made anything monetary from this website, and I’ve never expected to, I just like writing these reviews for fun. I added that donation button when I was unemployed and very desperate, but honestly it’s such a good feeling to see that someone out there appreciates these reviews enough to donate and support creativity and writing. Thank you again so much Jay, and I dedicate this review to you!

Hello everyone. I hope y’all are enjoying fall (if you live in the Northern Hemisphere). I can safely say this is my fav season. I love fall clothing (flannel, cardigans, boots etc.), pumpkin flavours, the crisp air and my two favourite holiday’s, Thanksgiving and Halloween, are during this season. So yes, I am enjoying this brief moment of time between the grossness of summer and the bleakness of winter. Anyway, enough on my thoughts of the seasons, let’s move on with the review.

I will admit I have been dragging my feet on rewatching this episode. It is highly melodramatic, and it involves Amanda’s family so I instantly don’t want to deal with this. But I owe you guys a review so let us go forward.

The episode opens with Amanda and Busy hanging around Amanda’s pad discussing how much cooler Leonard is than Phyllis because he took Amanda to a water park. I don’t even have kids, and I realize it’s a lot easier to be the “fun” parent when the parents are divorced and the spouse not living in the home only has to deal with the kid every other weekend.

Ok, I’m sorry, but I have to pause the review for a second. But pray tell, is Amanda wearing shorts or is her skirt in her ass crack in this scene? I honestly don’t know and I need some insight.

Anyway, back to the review. So Phyllis is clearly not in the mood to hear her child gushing about her shitty ex and tells Amanda to pipe down. Of course Amanda gets all bitchy at that remark and states to Busy that her mom is boring and not spontaneous because she has to chew an apple five times when she eats. Hey Amanda, maybe your mother has OCD which is a very real disorder so quit being a little brat.

This causes the girls to start cracking up which makes Phyllis even more irritated. She tells Amanda she’s sick of her coping an attitude every time she goes off to see Leonard. At this Amanda whips out her tired threat of moving in with Leonard instead of living with Phyllis. By this point if I was Phyllis I would say be my guest, but for some reason she still likes having this teen around and you can tell she’s upset by the remark. As usual they are having domestics in front of Busy and it’s super awkward for her. Finally Leonard ring-a-lings and Amanda takes off giving her mother 48 hours of relief.

Next scene Amanda and Leonard are playing ping pong and I can now see Amanda is definitely wearing a skirt… so yeah production did her dirty allowing that shot of her with a massive wedgie into the episode. Leonard orders “everything from the left side of the menu that is chocolate” from some restaurant which also delights Amanda. So the episode is making clear like who the actual parent is aka Phyllis does the parenting while Leonard does all the goofy stuff no real parent would do on a daily basis.

Leonard also has a surprise to show Amanda. Turns out he is now a video game designer or something, because he’s made some game for Gameboy (memmmmmmmmories) and he has called it AMAZIM since it has an environmental theme and is named after Amanda. He also wants Amanda to demonstrate it at some showcase next week.

Next scene is a short one, with Amanda showing off the game to Busy at school and Busy getting excited as it is pretty cool that Amanda’s dad created a game. Monkey Ears then nabs it and starts playing it and then attempts to start making money off of it by getting some randoms to pay him to play. Amanda grabs the game back before any of that can occur. Stick to selling photocopies of pictures from that Joy of Sex rip-off book, Monkey.

After school the girls are walking home with a super cute umbrella. Amanda is still going on and on about how Leonard is father of the year because he lives in a massive condo, they watch cartoons together, he buys her tons of glorious junk food etc. etc. Busy of course is jealous because all Sam does is yell at her to clean the house and make Italian subs for her. Busy is 100% rocking the Canadian tuxedo in this shot as well. Oh speaking of clothes, its important to note that jacket Amanda is wearing is Leonard’s… it will matter in the near future.

That evening Amanda and Phyllis start getting into it again because A. Leonard wants to do the demonstration of the game on a weekend that is technically Phyllis’ with Amanda and B. Amanda is being snotty about washing the dishes because she needs to practice the game for the demonstration. It’s pretty short and not really worth having screenshots for, it just shows that the relationship between Amanda and her mom is getting worse and worse with each passing day. Honestly though, it doesn’t surprise me. Do any teenage girls have good relationships with their moms? I certainly did not lol.

I guess Amanda got sick of Phyllis because she’s now at Busy’s house and they are both wearing the same clothes so it’s still the same day. Sam is singing some opera and torturing the girl’s eardrums while making sausages. Amanda points out to Busy that it must be nice having her dad around all the time, which Busy is like yeah it’s a blast hearing him hork up shit every morning while leaving the toilet sit up. Amanda tells Busy she’s reached her limit with Phyllis and she’s going to ask her dad this weekend if she can move in with him. Busy’s not thrilled, as her moving to the city means they’ll never see each other. So yeah, they must live in like Etobicoke or Scarborough or some outter part of the GTA i.e. the suburbs as I always suspected.

So Sam leaves, and as Amanda reaches into the pocket of the jacket to grab the GameBoy, a picture falls out. Busy picks it up and says Leonard might not be too keen on having Amanda move in with him as it looks like he has a lady friend now. Amanda’s confused as he’s never mentioned anything before about it. Amanda then looks at the back of the picture and notices the date…. The picture was taken while Leonard was still married to Phyllis. Escándalo!

Busy and Amanda then start analyzing the picture, saying it looked more like joking around/people being chummy, but you can tell by Amanda’s face she is not convinced. Busy pulls out her family photo albums and tries to find a non-romantic picture of people with their arms around each other which takes her a long time to find. Finally she finds one of Sam and her grandma, but like we already know this relationship and you could kind of gather from the age difference this was likely a mother with her son. Leonard’s bitch looks exactly the same age as him, as well she’s like leaning into him all couple-like, it’s not just his arm around her. So this whole exercise did not help calm Amanda’s growing fears that her dad is a trifling good-for-nothing-type-of-brother.

It’s finally the weekend of the toy demonstration and Leonard is all nervous and taking it out on some poor guy dressed as a frog for AMAZIM.

Amanda pulls up with her mom and Phyllis takes the time to apologize for being short with her and recognizes that Amanda deserves a relationship with her father. Amanda still has the photo on the brain and asks Phyllis if her dad has some long lost blonde relative she’s never met. Phyllis gives her a wtf look and states she sure as hell hopes not as apparently his relatives are still obnoxiously inviting her to events. This just points Amanda’s thoughts more towards the cheating scenario.

Amanda goes into the demonstration and see’s Leonard talking to some woman, but she starts imaging him with the blonde woman.

Amanda goes up to Leonard and doesn’t even beat around the bush, presenting him with the evidence of his cheating ways. You can tell by the look on Leonard’s face that he realizes Amanda knows he did a bad, bad thing. (Yes I’m going to keep referencing song lyrics if they apply to this episode).

Amanda immediately notices it as well. Leonard tries to brush it off, taking the photo and trying to proceed with the demonstration of the video game to the potential buyers. Amanda starts playing the game, but you can tell she’s far too shook by these recent developments and keeps making mistakes and dying in the game. Would this matter though? Maybe she’s just a shitty video game player. She keeps looking at the same lady she started imaging as the blonde in the beginning and I can tell by the lady’s face that she’s weirding this woman out.

Finally Amanda has had enough and cannot fake this spectacle anymore and runs off leaving everyone really wtf at the whole situation. Leonard should be the exception if he has half a brain and can put two and two together as to why she is upset.

Amanda runs off to Busy’s for condolences. She tells her she has confirmed her dad did cheat on her mom like a true rat bastard. Busy asks her what she’s going to do and Amanda says she has no idea, and how would Busy react if her dad did it. Busy makes a face I can definitely relate to because can you actually picture Sam cheating on Lucy? I can barely picture Sam showing affection to his wife, so him cheating would’ve been a hugely random development. Amanda then states she hates these cheesy fun weekends she’s forced to have with her dad and how Busy is lucky because she can just exist with her dad, and maybe if her jerk of a dad didn’t go sniffing around other women their family wouldn’t be broken. She realizes all these years she was blaming the wrong parent for it ending. Gotta say that was very good of Phyllis to allow Amanda to treat her like shit just to protect Leonard and Amanda’s relationship. Busy asks if Amanda thinks her mom is aware of the cheating, and Amanda’s like who the hell knows. P.S. Laura Bertram acts this scene out really well, she’s very good at these emotional crying scenes.

A very short scene at the school the next day has Amanda yelling at Monkey Ears to fuck off because he’s still bugging her about that dumb game. It’s old news Monkey Ears, go away.

Later in the evening Amanda is now being super nice to Phyllis because she realizes she’s the true victim in everything that happened in her family’s drama. She is even doing the dishes for her even though it’s not Amanda’s night. She hugs her tearfully and Phyllis is like what the hell, why is my child suddenly being nice to me after years of being a little shit stain.

Phyllis leaves to go to the dry cleaner, and Amanda goes into her room and shoves Leonard’s jacket into a bag and kicks it under her bed. She hears a knock on the door and figures it’s her mom but it’s actually her deadbeat dad. Leonard’s is outside the door pleading his case to Amanda basically saying he fucked up big time and wish he could take back everything he did. Amanda asked if Phyllis knew about it and Leonard confirms she did and that she never told Amanda because she didn’t want her to hate him. Leonard says that this has nothing to do with Amanda which really upsets her as she states they aren’t a family anymore and how can that have nothing to do with her. THIS EPISODE IS REALLY HARD TO MAKE FUN OF. I’ll admit this scene had me teary eyed… I cry easily, OK?! Amanda slams the door in Leonard’s face. He wanders off in defeat while Amanda cries within her apartment.

The episode ends which what looks like some time later; Amanda is reading a letter from her dad and is now trying to write a response back to him. I guess sorta minor spoiler, Amanda won’t be talking to her father for quite a while, at least not for the rest of this season.

God this episode was dramatic! Can we go back to the episodes of catching people calling into radio sex shows and having random teens stealing cars? I miss those simple, whacky episodes. So I guess we finally have a definitive answer as to how the Zimm household broke up. Do you guys think Leonard cheated before or after he lost his job? I’m assuming before, because it looked like they were at some party together and Leonard was living in sweat pants once he was unemployed. Either way, it’s pretty good how this show portrayed this, like how the kid always blames one of the parents for the divorce happening, and how they never really know what actually happened behind the scenes.

Ooof, I am glad that is DONE.

Next episode is my favourite of this season; teens thinking they are wasted off of non-alcoholic beer destroy a home. Until next time!

Season 4, Episode 7: Prince Charming

Hello, hello, hello. I hope the summer has been treating you all well. Mine’s been decent, went on a cross country train ride from Toronto to Vancouver which ended in an Alaskan cruise in June which was pretty sweet. July has been working, some swimming and seeing my bestie before she abandons me and goes off to live in Scotland for a year. I have been feel very uninspired and tired lately, which I hate. I’m trying to figure out a good work-life balance because right now it is hard and I miss being creative. One of the best ways for me to get back on track is to write a review here so off I go.

The episode opens with a shot of an old restaurant that used to exist in Toronto called Licks. I am almost positive this specific location is the one by my old high school in The Beaches area of Toronto. We go inside and we see Amanda and Phyllis with Stephen ordering some grub. Amanda’s all crabby because the reason they are there is because Stephen is a cheapo and will only go to places where he has coupons. But considering she’s likely getting a free meal, she should shut up and eat it.

Alas though, they did not come here just for the low priced food items, Stephen and Phyllis have an ulterior motive. They start casually bringing up Stephen’s loft and how its’ super big and awesome and arty etc. etc. Amanda catches on fast and is like “wtf are you alluding to?” Phyllis states that her and Stephen are in lurve and really want to try living together. How long have they been dating? Honestly it seems like only a couple months, especially since it felt like she dated SMel for ages. I guess Phyllis is really eager to just to lock it down with Stephen and not waste all her time like she did with her previous boyfriend. Amanda is unimpressed and states the usual blah blah you can’t control my life/stop ruining my life dramatics she’s known for. Phyllis tells her to cool her effin’ jets but Amanda peaces out because she’s tired of seeing her mom act so thirsty all the time.

The next day at school we are in an art class with a teacher who loves to quote Francis Bacon for some reason. Busy, Amanda and Nina are all painting away. Busy states that Ernie Lipnit keeps putting drawings of office supplies in her locker, which is extremely bizarre. She should consider herself lucky though as if this was nowadays she’d likely be getting dick pics sent to her via SnapChat. Busy notices Amanda’s being mopey and asks what’s up. Amanda states her mom’s usual bs is getting her down, which Busy shuts down immediately as her yearly quota of hearing about Amanda’s mom has been filled. Amanda gets really irate and gets up to get something just as Monkey Ears comes along, flicking paint at people like a mouth breather. Amanda tells him to f off and he asks her if she’s going to the dance and maybe they can go together. She says sure with fucking bells on and he believes her and gets really excited and scampers off.

Busy jokes that her and Lipnit could double date with Amanda and Monkey Ears which pisses off Amanda even more. The teacher then comes up and starts saying how Amanda shows a lot of promise since she’s painting a sunset instead of a train which is what they were originally told to do. I dunno, painting a sun seems a lot easier to me, but I guess since she was all rebellious and chose to do her own thing it impressed him. Nina jokes that she’s teacher’s pet which has Amanda stating he’s nice to everyone, but you can already tell that 10 second interaction with the teacher has gotten her smitten. Damn her absentee father giving her all these daddy issues. I wish they had some episode where Amanda ended up dating like a 30 year old, because it would make so much sense/be amazing in general.

Later on in the can Amanda starts asking Nina if she’s ever thought about moving out on her own. Nina says not really since she’s only 14 and comes from a stable family. She then asks Amanda why she’s asking about stuff like that. Amanda doesn’t really give an answer. Nina says its harder now for women since back in the old days we just waited for prince charming to come get us and then force us into wife/mother roles and not have any true independence. Amanda is like well that’s fine which has Nina being like bitch please this is the 90’s, we can take care of ourselves. But yeah, I guess Amanda’s mom wanting the peen constantly has gotten her so fed up she’s ready to move out.

At the end of the school day Amanda goes back to the art room to avoid going home and dealing with Phyllis. The teacher (I should really like skip ahead and get his name because thus far no one has said his name and I clearly can’t remember it), is in the room looking at some slides. He notes that all the other tweens are racing home and Amanda says she’s in no rush because her home is so broken. They bond over the fact that they both come from divorced families and he quotes some other random dead person about how unhappiness comes from not remembering good times. Amanda feels like she’s found her kindred spirit. Andrew (the teacher) is then called away by another teacher for some meeting and Amanda sits in the dark all happy that she’s formed what she considers a deep bond, meanwhile the teacher is just doing his job aka making sure his students are ok.

Next scene Amanda is in the car with her mom and once again Phyllis is back to hounding her about moving in with Stephen. Amanda is pretty much over her mom’s desperation, (her words) and thinks her mom only wants to move in ASAP because even though Stephen cuts the coupons out of the newspaper each weekend, he’s apparently rich. Well every rich person I know also likes to pretend they are the same as us poor plebs so I am not surprised. Amanda tells her mom she can’t force her to live with her and Phyllis says since you’re an annoying ass minor for now I can. Amanda mutters “for now” which leads into a Ready or Not daydream sequence…

It’s honestly just 10 seconds of Amanda as a bride and her teacher is at her window sill with roses ready to whisk her away. I wonder if that male actor felt awkward doing that, but I guess it was a pretty G rated fantasy for a teenager.

Phyllis disrupts the dream and tells Amanda that moving in with Stephen is only one option. I love when parents pretend they are actually giving their kids a choice. Like she’s clearly decided it’s happening, I don’t know why she’s giving Amanda this false hope that she even has an option (well other than moving in with Leonard and/or a shanty town).

The next day while walking to school Busy asks Amanda if she’s going to move in with him. Amanda says “Andrew?” Busy says who tf is Andrew? no Stephen obviously. Amanda then asks how in the hell Busy knew about all that since the last time she attempted to bring it up in the art class Busy told her to shut her yap. Busy plays dumb, but then admits that Phyllis got to whispering in her ear when she phoned Amanda after school and told her to work on her stubborn ass daughter. Amanda’s pretty pissed now because even her best friend is pushing for this to happen. Busy says she’s not sure what the problem is because the loft is big and seems cool. Amanda says the problem is there’s no walls and she’ll hear her mom and Steven banging all the time, and since Busy’s parents don’t do it everyday she can’t understand.

Inside the school Amanda is now in the teacher’s classroom setting up his art supplies for him. While he’s trying to set up an easel she find a post-it note where he wrote down “symbol as meaning” and she naturally takes it to add to her collection of garbage momentos. The teacher asks how things are at home and she says still shitty since her mom is bugging her about moving in with her man candy. The teacher says something that sounds like a quote but I’m not sure if it is, basically that change is one of life’s most inconvenient events. He gives her shoulder a little non-sexual (this isn’t Mr. Colby from Degrassi Jr. High) squeeze, and you can tell Amanda is taking it to mean a lot more than it actually is. We also learn Andrew is being forced to chaperone the dance so Amanda definitely will be making an appearance.

I guess the next day (since Amanda’s wearing a different outfit) we get a small scene of Monkey Ears asking out Amanda, her laughing in his face and then Busy coming along saying that she should give the dork a chance and just go to the dance with him. Amanda says no way in hell, because she must fly solo as something special will be happening. Busy knows right away it’s about some guy, but Amanda plays it coy and doesn’t give away that she’s hot for teacher.

That night Amanda’s decided to steal her mom’s LBD to impress Andrew. Phyllis barges in while she’s practicing schmoozing him up while looking in the mirror. Phyllis wanted to wear the dress for her night out with Stephen, but decides to let Amanda have it as she needs it to impress a boy and Phyllis knows that’s always a top priority for the Zimm women.

So now we’re at the dance and it’s being DJ’d by someone who sucks because all this song is singing is “OOaOooOaoOOoO La la la“. This is pretttty much on par with the disco song from the first Danny episode. This show isn’t even trying with the fake music anymore. I think Shattered Heart might’ve been the last one with actual lyrics. Amanda Busy and Nina are all hanging out on the bleachers, with Nina and Busy admitting the only reason they are at this sad display is to see Amanda’s mystery man.

Busy and Nina try to guess who it is, with Busy mentioning some guy who apparently has really bad ear wax according to Nina lol. But while they are having their random ass convo, teacher Andrew walks in and Amanda lights up like a damn Christmas tree at the sight of his mid 30’s ass. She runs off to get a drink aka have an excuse to talk to him.

FINALLY we learn the teacher’s name, Mr. Sark. How are we 15:45 into this episode and no one ever said his name yet? SLASH perhaps they did, but I’m really too lazy/don’t want to go back and rewatch this episode. If someone wants to be a real MVP and track it next time they watch and let me know that’d be golden. Anyway, they talk about how the dance sucks because no one is there and Mr. Sark mentions it’s been that way since he’s been teaching there for the past eight years. This freaks Amanda out as he began his teaching career when she was barely out of diapers, which makes her kind of doubt her lust for half a millisecond. But I can tell Amanda is def one of those age-ain’t-nothing-but-a-number type girls so it immediately goes back to being a non-issue.

While this extremely awkward moment is happening, Busy is making fun of the fact that Ernie Lipnit “never actually closes his mouth.” HAHHAHA I am loving Nina and Busy’s convos this evening.

So Amanda goes for it and asks Mr. Sark to dance. Of course he says no, because why would he dance with a 14 year old student? However, Amanda’s got an ace up her sleeve and was clearly preparing for the rejection, because she found the perfect Francis Bacon quote to sweep Mr. Sark off his feet. So of course he gives in, likely because he realizes if this teenage girl is willing to seek out such a specific quote for this particular moment there’s really no telling how far she’d go to get him to notice her i.e. into possible illegal territory.

Thus a super awkward as hell dance commences between Amanda and Mr. Sark. Lucky for him though Monkey Ears spots a perfect opportunity to cut in and dance with Amanda and Sark takes that and runs with it/away from Amanda.

Later in the washroom, Amanda is wiping Monkey Ears’ drool off her neck…blech. Nina and Busy are still like “where’s the dude?” Amanda says he’s here and that Andrew is sweet, gorgeous, romantic etc. The girls still haven’t figured out who she is talking about even though the only two men she’s talked to this evening are Sark and ME. Busy literally starts listing all the Andrews they’ve ever known in their life, going back to an Andy Ching in the 5th grade. But Amanda is still playing it cool and not spilling the beans. If I were Busy or Nina at this point I’d stop caring.

Suddenly as they round the corner, Amanda spots Andrew with that teacher from earlier in the episode who came into his classroom about the meeting (probably was a code word for some hanky panky). They seem to be pretty fond of each other as they are standing pretty close by teacher standards. Amanda notices too and is probably instantly flashing back to when she caught Frankie with that random girl. Poor Amanda always has to find her crushes in the arms of other ladies. She runs off and we hear the woman teacher say Andrew aloud so Busy and Nina finally clue in to who Andrew is.

Once again, Busy is there to pick up a shattered Amanda. She doesn’t really give her any answers as to how this weird crush fermented, but Busy knows not to question when it comes to Amanda as literally anything can trigger crushes out of her. Busy offers the only real advice in that Andrew wasn’t Amanda’s type i.e. legal for her to date. Amanda accepts it because frankly it’s true and honestly what did she expect? God this episode is cringey.

The next morning Phyllis comes into the living room to find Amanda had slept on the floor, saying she wants to see what it’s like not sleeping in her own room. I guess in preparation for the inevitable move she’ll be making soon. Amanda says it was terrible, but she slept on the friggin floor right beside a couch! I honestly do not get why she didn’t just sleep on the damn sofa, but anyway. They have small talk about the evening and Amanda tells her things didn’t go well with Mr. Sark and she’s done with that. Her mom still has no idea her daughter was harboring this lust for an older man so she’s like that’s a shame. The episode ends with them talking about some random shit from Amanda’s childhood.

I found this episode a real chore to get through. Other than Nina and Busy’s various conversations, there wasn’t anything funny in this and the teacher crush was cringey and out of nowhere. I honestly think this episode would’ve worked way better if it came after another episode that comes later on this season. Once I review I’ll mention it again, as it would make a lot more sense for Amanda to be crushing on an older man after that episode rather than before.

Actually said episode is the next one, Amanda will learn a troubling secret about daddy dearest Leonard…will their relationship survive? Until next time!

Season 4, Episode 6: The Girlfriend

Hello friends, spring has finally sprung, and since I failed you all and didn’t get this review out in February (I did start writing it mind you, it’s just been sitting on my computer for like a month) I figured I best get it done before March April is over. We’re in a new season, hopefully winter weather is finally DONE and we can go forth and be merry.

Anyway, as promised, this is me attempting to not fall ridiculously behind with this blog, so let us dive right into this episode entitled The Girlfriend.

The episode opens with some random spaz in a hand stand going on about the rush he had when he went bungee jumping. Naturally Amanda is super impressed as he is a mildly decent looking male, while the rest of the world remains unimpressed because why should we care about this person.

While this is happening, Busy and Sag are working on some weird ass music together, complete with car horns and wind chimes. It’s not terrible but it definitely sounds like something teenagers would create. So we learn this dude’s name is Henry and he and Sag “connected”. I legit have no idea how these two would connect, unless he meant like actual physical connection via Henry hitting Sag in the face while extreme rollerblading off a guard rail. I for one support that kind of connection when it comes to Sag.

So Henry decides this moody jam is the perfect time to dance around like he’s having a seizure, which has Amanda awkwardly joining in. I tried to get a screen shot, but honestly it was impossible with all the movements of their limbs. Busy and Sag chuckle to one another at both having special friends. All of sudden some broad in a cast comes down the stairs and flashes Sag a coy grin. Whose this new harlot you ask? Well apparently her name is Colleen and she used to be Sag’s boo, hence the title of this episode *DUN DUN*

Hahaha look at the fake ass smile on Busy’s face. You can tell she’s none too thrilled about this recent development.

Later on they are all hanging out at this Juice bar that apparently is their new spot and Colleen is going about being transferred because of a “rezoning law”. Again with the frickin rezoning laws, why can’t they come up with realistic reasons like her parents moved across town or some shit? Anyway, we also learn how Colleen broke her leg, which involved falling down the stairs at school courtesy of an orange. I wonder if this actress actually had a broken leg in real life, because this broken leg plot adds legit nothing other than making her kinda needy and annoying with Sag, but she could’ve been that way without a broken leg.

We also learn that Sag’s real name is Bernie and hence why he goes by Sag. I would’ve definitely voted for him to keep Bernie. I have an aunt Bernie and she’s awesome as well as Weekend At Bernie’s, hilarious movie. Using his middle name of Sag just makes him even more fucking pretentious than he already his.

So Henry comes back and adds to the conversation that once he also fell down the stairs while on blades… AND I SWEAR TO GOD I DID NOT REMEMBER THAT WHEN I MADE THAT JOKE IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH ABOUT HIM HITTING SAG. I’m sure my subconscious mind did though, because we all know this show seeps into you like a brain eating parasite. But yeah, no surprise this dum dum is hurling himself down stairs on blades, no surprise AT ALL.

Sag hears some generic Ready or Not fake song beat… I swear I’ve heard it before (or will in future episodes) and runs off to check it out. Amanda and Henry go off to get some more juice (that just sounds so lame to write), leaving Colleen and Busy a chance to chat one on one about Bernie.

Meaning mostly just Colleen gushing about how she’s had a gross crush on Sag since the dawn of time and they’d still be dating if she hadn’t been transferred. Must not have been a very strong relationship if they couldn’t survive not being in the same school. Busy’s face kinda just says it all in this screenshot.

Back at Amanda’s, Busy is complaining about how annoying as fuck Colleen is and wonders how the hell Sag could have ever liked her. Amanda states it’s because Busy wants Sag’s pogo stick and is jealous of seeing another female around him. Busy rolls her eyes and states they have nothing in common (other than thinking they are better musicians than they actually are) and Amanda says opposites attract and Sag is cute and deep etc. etc. At the same time Amanda is also going about bungee jumping because apparently stupid Henry convinced her she should try and ask her mom to do a beginner’s course because Amanda’s latest fear is being boring. As a boring person, I gotta tel you it’s pretty sweet, it takes way too much effort to be doing something exciting constantly.

Amanda mentions that Sag and Busy are a “perfect team” which prompts a Ready or Not daydream sequence. I dunno, maybe I am just jaded, but I find the ones during these later seasons not as charming as the older season sequences. I guess they had an extremely low budget charm I enjoyed, these ones seem to be trying too hard, but I digress. So Sag and Busy are a singing duo much like Captain and Tennille. They are sitting in the audience of what I can only assume is the Juno awards, because there is no way they would be famous outside of Canada. Actually no, apparently they are “the top singing duo in the universe”, like you couldn’t even make this somewhat realistic, Busy? Maybe top singing duo of the Etobicoke region of Toronto? Nah…even that is not realistic. Anyway, of course they win because they are just so perf together.

The dream is interrupted by Amanda legit banshee shrieking as she jumps off her desk onto her bed practicing for her bungee jump. I don’t goddamn know. But I guess Amanda’s feedback has entered Busy’s mind as it seems she is considering Sag as a potential suitor.

Next is a short scene of Sag and Busy rehearsing more of their weird music while Colleen sits on the couch crazy eyed staring at Sag. Girl needs to get a life. Has she been hanging around him since she transferred, or has she recently decided to up her stalking game. You can tell Busy is getting mighty tired of this chick hanging around all the time now.

The next day Busy approaches Sag to tape the basketball game or something and naturally Colleen is literally right behind him forcing him to walk her home. She’s picked up transcripts to transfer back to Dorsey so she can stalk on a full time basis. Busy needs to act fast as this cock blocker is literally wrecking her chances with Sag.

Hahahaha Sag’s face is legit “Fuck My Life” expression come alive.

Colleen waddles over to a water fountain and Sag’s uses his 0.1 second of free time from her to invite Busy to the Grove aka that juice bar after school. Busy inquires if Colleen will be joining as she’s had just about enough QT with this gal. Sag states she’s probably too tired to which Busy then agrees to meet up with him.

Amanda, Busy and Henry are all at The Grove drinking various non-alcoholic fruit drinks and waiting on a tardy Sag. Busy wonders aloud why he’s so late and just as the words escape her mouth in walks the gimp Colleen with Sag. Honestly no one should be surprised at this point, this girl is a stage four clinger. Busy goes off to refresh her beverage. While she’s gone, Amanda ignores whatever the fuck Henry is talking about and listens in on Colleen bad mouthing Busy to Sag, stating she doesn’t mesh well with Sag’s music and wrecks his “image”. Sag is like wtf as even he know he’s image is all bs, but Amanda is pissed that this girl is talking smack about her bff to the guy she wants to mack with.

Amanda goes over to Busy and is like “GIRL YOU BETTER STEP THAT PUSSY UP” but not really (sorry I watch way too much RuPaul’s Drag Race). Nah she basically tells her to take control and get that man because Colleen is doing all she can to throw her under the bus. Busy grows a pair and walks up to Sag and asks if he wants to dance. Colleen does her best disabled impression to get Sag to stay and get her a drink, but Amanda’s got that covered and already has a drink ready for Colleen. Amanda’s a pretty awesome wing woman I gotta say.

So anyway, of course right as they get up to dance, an electric organ version of Shattered Heart or something similar starts playing and Busy and Sag ease themselves into an awkward slow dance. Finally they start dancing closer and appear to enjoy each other’s company, much to the chagrin of Colleen who makes a bee line to the exit fast. She sure can hustle when she isn’t enjoying what she’s seeing. Busy and Sag don’t give a rat’s beeehind and continue to dance together in a tender fashion.

Later on at Busy’s, the girls are having a sleepover and discussing the day’s events. Amanda is excited that Busy will get to experience all these new firsts as Sag’s girlfriend i.e going to dances, movies etc. Busy states they’ve gone to movies before, but Amanda says it’s different now because he’ll likely try and get fresh and attempt to unhook her bra. Amanda then asks if Busy took a momento to remember the day. Busy says no because she doesn’t collect garbage (her words haha) and Amanda brings out a pencil case of old shit she has from her days with Danny like a bus pass from the the first time they held hands. I bet you anything Frankie’s toe nail clippings are in there. She gives Busy a napkin from The Grove that she took so Busy can have a physical memory of her awkwardly dancing with Sag forever.

The next day at school Sag comes up to Busy and Amanda and takes Busy’s hand, telling her he has a gift for her. So you can already tell Sag is ready for the boyfriend role. Amanda is super excited and wants all the deets later on. Busy and Sag walk still holding hands, then sit down on a bench. His gift for Busy is some cassette with weird ass animal music, which is basically Sag in a nutshell, so it definitely came from the heart. Finally he does the ol’ arm around the shoulder and leans in for a smooch. Honestly the chemistry is like in the negatives though, even worse than Busy and Troy’s chemistry. I can tell right off the bat that Busy is not feeling this, and even brings up Colleen right after it happens. No girl would be discussing the ex after kissing a guy they were into, so I can see this will likely be fizzling out real soon. I hate that this show will not allow Busy or Amanda to have relationships with people I actually want them to!

Later on Amanda and Busy are on the phone and it’s been discovered that Phyllis is actually going to allow Amanda to do the bungee jump training course as long as she can come along. Amanda asks about the kiss and Busy is pretty meh to talk to about it so you know she felt nothing. She tells Amanda it was weird to kiss him and she might not get used to it, so yeah Sag is def heading for the friend zone at warp speed. Also this scene is borderline pointless to show a pic, but I think it’s hilarious Amanda is talking on the phone with her helmet on so screen shot it is.

Next day at school Busy has some empty water cooler jug for some reason and is attempting to shove it in her locker full of crap. Colleen wanders up (she’s still around?) and Busy asks if she’s transferred yet, just as Sag walks up and puts his arm awkwardly around Busy. I honestly think he did it to make Colleen take a fucking hint and leave him alone. Colleen says she hasn’t transferred and she might not anymore since Dorsey sucks now that her chances with Sag are gone. She then wanders off into the abyss never to be seen again.

 

After she’s gone Busy and Sag have this weird interaction of them talking but then also having their own inner dialogue. Sag tells Busy he finished their mixed tape by himself which freaks Busy out for some reason (in her mind) but she tries to play it off. Sag notices though and wonders to himself if he did something wrong. Then he invites her over to listen for a “date” which he also internally freaks out about. He also helps her sorta organize her gross locker which disgusts him and after that as he leaves Busy notices he doesn’t ever tie his shoes. I honestly don’t really know what the point of this was other than to get them to start noticing stupid flaws so they can have reasons not to be a couple? Anyway, it was random and dumb.

Welp, I hope none of you got attached to Busy and Sag as a couple because we now have to wrap up this situation real quick as there is about 8 minutes left in this episode and you know they aren’t progressing any further with this plot. So Busy goes to Sag’s place to jam and notices that Sag has added some clanking sound to the mix that she wasn’t informed about. You can tell she’s irritated, but let’s it go. Then she starts singing her mesmerizing lyrics of “Huuh huuuh huuuh your face ev-re-y waaah, your fay-ce, your fay-ce“. Honestly dude, why didn’t you let Amanda write for you? I guess Brian Wilson is also noticing they aren’t up to par and suggests that they have less lyrics. Cue another dream sequence!

So it’s exactly the same as last time, except now Sag is a solo artist winning all dem c.d.’s glued onto trophy stands. Busy’s at home eating Cheeto’s and moping.

So this leads Busy to freak out on Sag, exclaiming that it’s clear he doesn’t want her in his band anymore. Sag says just because he likes to play by himself sometimes *insert immature laughter* doesn’t mean he doesn’t want her around. Sag tells Busy he has “no idea where she is coming from” and Busy says “is that what you mean?” to which he replies “I mean what I say.” Busy says what we’re all thinking in that he speaks in fucking metaphors and riddles and no one actually knows what the hell he ever says. Sag point blank asks if she’s dumping him. She says no, then in 10 seconds changes her answer to yes and runs off. So yeah, that escalated quickly. Sag is left looking sad and confused and possibly chubby. Seriously, does this kid wear a lot of layers or is he overweight? I CAN’T TELL.

The next day at school Busy is telling Amanda about her break up with Sag. Amanda tries to tell Busy to give it one more go, but Busy states she has no sexual attraction to Sag at all, and it’s done. Amanda’s disappointed as once again they are both back to being boring single ladies. Busy asks Amanda if she went through with the other subplot I keep forgetting about and bungee jumped. Amanda says she chickened out, but Phyllis ended up going for it.

Sag comes waltzing down the hall playing a goddamn harmonica, and Amanda peaces out. Busy and Sag kinda have awkward small talk about yesterday, but everything gets resolved rather quickly with Busy stating the song is fine without her and perfect on it’s own. I guess symbolizing that she’ll never be any sort of duo with Sag ever again, especially sexually. She ends up giving him a tape Amanda gave her of her mom screaming her head off while jumping stating if he wants to end the song on something crazy as hell he should use that. Sag then wanders off still playing that harmonica… God he’s so annoying sometimes. So this whole time Busy is cleaning out her shit hole locker and comes across The Grove napkin Amanda gave her as a memory of her and Sag’s date. She decides to keep it. P.S. Amanda gave that to her at Busy’s house, it was never in her locker, so like was she carrying it around the whole time? or did the writer’s just forget that scene 15 minutes ago. We notice these things Ready or Not writers… we notice them.

Anyway, the episode ends with Busy cleaning out her locker for probably the rest of the day.

Overall I liked this episode, but at the same time some parts were kind of dumb aka Colleen was totally pointless. She seemed to serve to get Busy and Sag together I suppose, but I feel like eventually that was bound to happen either way. Now that I think about it, I think Busy was annoyed by Colleen because she was always Yoko Onoing Sag and getting in the way of their music and not because she was jealous and had a crush on him. Well she’s not coming back, keeping with this season’s theme of many random one episode characters. I’m also disappointed in Sag and Busy not lasting a bit longer, like they could’ve probably milked one more episode of them together working on music and discovering they don’t mesh well as a couple/musicians. Ah well, don’t worry if you like him though, cuz Sag’s pretentious ass is here til basically the end.

Next episode… Amanda develops a creepy crush on a teacher.

 

Season 4, Episode 5: I Do, I Don’t

Happy 2019! I realize I haven’t updated this since spring 2018 which I’m frankly ashamed of. I have vowed to finish this blog by the end of 2019 and goddamn I’m gonna try. I’ve had this review pending since friggin’ April, so I gotta do better. I WILL DO BETTER.

I’ve been missing this place lately, and all you randoms around the world who enjoy reading my reviews. Plus I just like writing these things, I miss this show, I miss this site. ALSO, I found out via a Facebook friend that there is a website called Encore+ which is dedicated to old school (re: mostly 80’s and 90’s) Canadian movies/shows and Ready or Not is on there! I haven’t checked to see if they have the entire series up, but they definitely have quite a few. They also have Edgemont which is a super cheesy 90’s teen show based in British Columbia that I’m most likely going to review next if I ever finish this website (so don’t steal my idea, bitches). But yeah, go check out this site because it’s pretty awesome, and lots of Canadian gold (check out the Heritage Minutes, every 90’s Canadian youth will remember these fondly growing up).

Also, you guys should go to the Encore+ Facebook because they have videos of Lani and Laura answering questions as current day humans! They talk about their fav episodes, fav fan encounters etc. I think it’s awesome they are back together doing something like this and made me want to get back into doing these reviews even more.

The episode opens with Nona stabbing Busy with needles as she works on Busy’s bridesmaid dress for Manny and Sheila’s wedding. Of course Amanda is hanging around, soaking in the Ramone family events as her own family never has anything going on. Amanda asks Lucy if there’s anything her and Busy could help out with at the wedding, much to Busy’s chagrin. Lucy says they can deal with the bridal shower food. This gets Amanda super excited and she starts going on about how bridal showers are “secret societies where woman honor the bride” while Busy just rolls her eyes stating Amanda clearly hasn’t been to many. See I was definitely the Busy when I got married in 2017. I hated the whole planning process and didn’t even want a bridal shower, so I can definitely feel her over-it attitude towards these events.

Amanda brings up the fact that she’s bringing some rando named Cameron to the wedding which leads everyone to start bugging Busy about a date. Busy’s like “get off my damn back” aka is now under some serious pressure to bring a young gent to the event. Oh yeah, and one of the themes of this episode is Busy not being feminine enough for life… or something like that.

Next day at school during lunch Amanda has a friggin’ stack of bridal magazines and is going through all of them looking at bride’s maid’s dresses/finger foods/I honestly don’t even know. This would be sad if she Busy aka related to the person getting married but not actually getting married, but the fact that’s she’s even more removed from this whole event makes it even more tragic. Amanda starts getting on Busy’s case about finding a date for the wedding, with Busy telling her she already asked some dude but was turned down. Suddenly some grease monkey named Jordan walks in with some jocks and tosses a football at “Ramone” stating that he saw her on the field and that she was awesome the other day. Amanda then immediately says Busy should ask him as “guy’s never talk to girls first unless they like them.” Busy is like “that’s stupid AF” but after more prodding by Amanda she eventually goes and asks him. Like the other guy, Jordan comes up with an excuse not to go, and afterwards laughs to his bros stating dating Busy would be like dating her brother. Well Busy’s ensemble is definitely not helping here, as she does look like a dude/sexually confused woman. P.S. Totally remember/slightly digging her name necklace though, I owned one myself.

Later on, Busy is walking down the hall with sage Sag who states that Busy is a rare bird and that common folk such as Jordan do not get her. The validity of his statements immediately go out the window for me though as he then states that “Mercury is in retrograde” and that he will thus bomb his math test. I hate people who throw out that damn phrase when life is being shitty, but it also doesn’t surprise me that Sag would be into new age shit and astrology. I wonder if he has healing crystals in his Columbine trench coat. Anyway, Busy asks him if he wants to go to the wedding, but Sag has a legit excuse in that it is his mom’s bday and he can’t. So yeah, strike three and Busy is out. Aka why is she not asking Monkey Ears, you know that kid has no social life whatsoever.

Later on in the eve, Amanda is testing out food’s for Sheila’s bridal shower. Busy mentions that all the dudes at Dorsey have now rejected her and thus she is going to go stag to the wedding. Amanda then mentions that her beau Cam has a very special friend named Matt Kalinski who Busy should consider asking out. Busy points out that she barely knows this guy and it would be weird to ask him out of the blue. Amanda states that she didn’t know Cam, and that she just obsessively stalked his locker/learned all his interests (again, this is the pre-social media era, so that would legit involve some goooood stalking skills) and that’s how she reeled him in. Busy’s pretty indifferent to not having a date, while Amanda acts like Busy will be shunned by all 900 guests (it’s an Italian wedding, I’m assuming that’s a fair estimate) if she dares to show up solo.

The next day Busy comes home and everyone in the Ramone household has that feeling because they all want sexual healing. We hear Frankie chatting on the phone to his rent-a-date about necking in his car, Sam and Lucy are sitting in the living room getting cozy and remembering their own wedding day and finally Sheila and Manny mapping out all the spots they plan on banging at during their honeymoon. You can tell Busy is starting to feel like a freak because she doesn’t have her own special someone to perform annoying PDA acts with. Sheila then notices Busy and states that her bridesmaid shoes have come in. Busy complains they are too painful, which d’uh, she’s wearing thick socks with them in this scene… silly Busy. Frankie then says Busy just needs a new body transplant or something in general which makes Busy feel even more shitty about her perceived lack of sex appeal.

This then prompts a Ready or Not daydream sequence featuring a bunch of people at the foot of the staircase of the Ramone household. Sheila is up top in her bridal attire about to throw the bouquet. Amanda and some other randoms are all excited, when all of a sudden Busy appears out of nowhere wearing full football gear and charges forward and steals the bouquet. Manny/Sam/Frankie all kinda do some weird yell/booo combo at her while Busy eventually ends up getting charged at by all the women for the bouquet. Yeah, I got nothing. It’s odd.

The next scene is Sheila’s bridal shower which mostly just consists of her getting lots of slutty lingerie from the guests and Busy feeling more awkward about being a woman. It’s pretty boring, and thus no screenshots for you!

The next day at school Amanda spots Cam and no, your eyes are not deceiving you, Matt is indeed played by Ryan Gosling, star of projects such as Breaker High and Young Hercules and a couple movies too.

Amanda and Busy saunter over and Amanda starts some chit chat with the boys, eventually bringing up that some action movie is playing at the movie theatre and that they should all go together. Busy points out that Amanda fucking hates action movies, to which Amanda tells her to shut her pie hole as she has a strategy going on. Amanda then says they should go chill at Amanda’s afterwards and continue on their “old fashioned double date”. The guys agree and Amanda skips off happily with Busy. Busy points out that she was acting like a complete airhead and Amanda states that she was only following the directions of her teen magazine which stated to find out a guy’s interests and choose an activity based on the interests. I’m not defending Amanda, but it’s true that those teen magazines in the 90’s definitely were geared towards making guys notice you through any means possible. I really hope they have improved in the last 20 years. Amanda tells Busy that all that matters is getting Busy a date for the wedding which at this point if I was Busy I would not give two shits about. Apparently it’s really easy to get laid at weddings, so I’m sure she could find one of her male/female thrice removed cousins to make out with.

 

Later on, after the movie, the foursome are at Amanda’s pad discussing the cinematic experience. The guys are going on and on about various explosions and how awesome they were, with Amanda chiming in saying how much she loved the movie. Busy isn’t even trying to hide how stupid she thought it was as evident by her mocking the guys in this shot. Gotta love how the YTV logo is basically making the same face.

Amanda starts getting pissed at Busy for not just agreeing with everything the guys are saying. Ryan Gosling aka Matt asks what everyone rates the movie, with Amanda stating 5 stars and that it’s the Citizen Kane of our time. Both the guys say they found it just “ok” which of course had Amanda backtracking her answer. Busy just kinda sits there not knowing what to say, because she’s having a real hard time playing dumb for two guys she doesn’t give a shit about. Matt suggests they listen to some music and brings up some fake band named Gecko. Busy says that Shy Type aka another fake band is much better and they should listen to that. Matt says he can tell Shy Type uses a drum machine which Busy calls bullshit on and tells Matt that he shouldn’t state facts about shit he doesn’t know about. He says the same, which enrages former drummer Busy. Just as she’s about to school Ryan Gosling on music through a physical beating, Amanda drags her into her bedroom because Busy is ruining everything by daring to disagree with a guy.

In the bedroom Amanda tells Busy she needs to cool her hot head because she’s ruining her chances of scoring a date with Ryan Gosling. Normally I’d definitely be on Amanda’s side, but Ryan is not at his peak here… he definitely got better with age, so I’m Team Busy in that she states she’s not going to play dumb in regards to her musical knowledge for a guy. She states if making a guy feel smarter than her is what being a girl is about then she doesn’t want to be one anymore. Amanda tells her she’s a female, get used to it, to which Busy says that she’s fine being a cat lady for life because there is no way she’s compromising her intelligence to appease a guy. You go Busy, totally with you there gurl.

So Busy is over it and leaves Amanda’s place. The two guys are still there kinda not sure wtf to do when Amanda tries to play off that everything is peachy, but Cam has decided it’s time to blow this pop stand. He also tells Amanda he won’t be accompanying her to the wedding. Amanda figures its because Busy freaked out in front of them, but he tells her it’s because she’s not original in stating the obvious that having no opinion is boring as hell and a normal person would not really want to date someone like that. Wouldn’t it have been hilarious though if he ended up calling Busy and asking her out instead? Nah, I’m pretty sure chicks like Busy scare off teenage boys. So anyway, the dudes leave, Ryan Gosling steals an apple and Amanda is left heartbroken.

The next day all the Italians are weeping at the Ramone’s house as little Manny is finally going to tie the knot. In the midst of all the commotion we see Busy is all dolled up in her bridesmaid dress and the family is literally stunned that she actually looks really beautiful, despite being pretty much a full fledged tom boy the rest of the time. Busy states the obvious in that anyone can look good if they make a bit of effort.

Honestly though, the looks on their faces, you’d think they had just seen that Brontosaurus in Jurassic Park for the first time.

Busy asks Amanda if she’s sad about Cam and she says no because she’d rather mack on some of Busy’s fine Italian cousins. The episode ends with Busy informing Amanda the one she has her eye on is hairier than an Italian rug.

I liked this episode because it was one showcasing how Busy does not back down on her ideals, and when your a teenage girl it can be really, really hard not to give in a try to change yourself in ways you don’t like to be noticed by the opposite sex. Busy realizes keeping it real and being single is ALWAYS better than dating Ryan Gosling. Well…maybe not always…. I mean he’s pretty hot nowadays. JK! Be true to yourself y’all!!

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay I finished this review 9 months later. Never again, people! NEVER AGAIN. Melissa’s getting her groove back, and I vow to have another review up by the end of this month. Thanks for reading gang, here’s to more questionable Ready or Not moments in 2019!

Season 4, Episode 4: Glamour Girl

Howdy ho! Well my New Year’s Resolution was to produce at least one review a month, and since January is over in like 3 days I better get on it! Luckily I actually really enjoy this episode so it should be good times.

We sort of pick up from where the last episode left off, in that Amanda is now performing her riveting new role as a tornado in The Wizard of Oz at the community theatre. The production is extremely low budget and hilarious, with a 40 year old playing Dorothy and a mechanical dog in the role of Toto. Everyone in the audience is laughing their asses off and rightly so.

Yes that black blob thing is Amanda. She accidentally kicks the dog and makes it go flying which makes everyone laugh even more. Busy and Phyllis are both on the cusp of cracking up, Phyllis with a combined look of humour and embarrassment on her face as her only offspring makes a fool of herself in front of their whole community.

Finally Amanda’s costume becomes her undoing and she goes flying backwards, literally crushing the dog. Geez, they are damn lucky they didn’t use a real dog or PETA would be on their asses so fast. At this point the play is really a lost cause as people are losing their shit.

After the play Nina comes up to Amanda, Phyllis and Busy and comes up with a half-assed excuse for making a shitty costume and then runs off. Phyllis tries to be a supportive mother while holding back laughter and tells Amanda she’s still a star, and then also runs off. Amanda bitches at Busy for laughing at her, while Biz points out the literally the whole community centre was laughing at her. Being as overly dramatic as she usually is, Amanda wallows in self-pity for basically suffering the worst humiliation that a human could even though literally only 20 people saw the play.

Next day at school Amanda is still pissed because the school newspaper (has to be a school newspaper, no way a real newspaper would cover this crap), has given unfavourable reviews of her performance. People are also walking by making WHOOSING sounds so I guess news spreads fast when people make asses of themselves at Dorsey Jr. High. Nina tells her to chill out and then they both start getting bitchy towards each other, with Amanda blaming Nina’s costume and Nina blaming Amanda’s performance. I think both of them are probably right.

Later that day Amanda calls Busy to go rollerblading, which Busy promptly forgot about and promised to go shopping with Sag to buy a new slide whistle or something. Busy suggests she go with Nina which Amanda says hell no to as these two hoes are having a tift right now. Amanda then asks Busy if she’s embarrassed to be seen with her which Busy says yes to lol. Aka she was kidding, but of course Amanda takes it serious and starts to have an identity crisis. This girl would really benefit from regular therapy sessions.

Amanda decides to wander the mean streets of Toronto looking for acceptance and discovers some rando modelling agency and goes in. Did we not already have a story line like this in season 1?

So I guess this agency just lets anyone walk in off the street, as I’m sure Amanda had no resume or head shot, but is now all gussied up and about to have a photo shoot take place. She tells the make-up artist how she wishes she looked like this last night at her shitty play. The lady then tells her that modelling is the perfect stepping stone for acting.  She goes on to say that no actresses are ugly (mmkay) and that looks are basically all that matter when it comes to performing. Amanda then says she wants to be known for her talent, and random lady says sure but no one gives a fuck about a school play, but they will notice you in advertisements. Sadly, this is true.

The next day at school Amanda tells Busy about the modelling stuff and Busy is kinda like “well cool if that’s what you want to do.” Amanda gets a bit annoyed that Busy is not immediately supportive, but Busy points out that acting and modelling are not the same and you don’t need to really have much talent other than looking hot to be a model. Amanda becomes more irate and tells Busy she should just support this opportunity because obviously this stupid modelling shoot is going to land her some roles in Hollywood real soon. Busy knows better than to argue with Amanda when she gets in one of her moods and backs off.

A new scene has Amanda in her room looking at herself as per usual. Phyllis comes in to confirm that she checked it out and the modelling agency isn’t really a human trafficking ring. Amanda is like “d’uh”, but Phyllis is like “You’d be stupid enough to be sold into slavery.” Despite it being legit, Phyllis thinks she should come with Amanda, just in case Terry Richardson happens to be the photographer. Amanda tells her that would be uncool and that none of the other girl’s mom’s come with them. Phyllis gives in to her whining daughter’s ways and Amanda is all giddy because she still somehow thinks this modelling shit is going to lead to an Academy Award (yes she actually says that).

Amanda is finally at her real photo shoot where she sits with some weirdo girl who uses hemorrhoid cream on her eyes for bags and drains her hands of blood (seriously, this is what is happening). Finally the boss lady, Ms. Van Dreesen calls Amanda up to strut her stuff.

Thus begins some sassy AF posing.

I have to admit, for someone’s first time doing this, she actually does a really good job. Ms Van Dreseen seems to think so too and even tells Amanda she could possibly be the next Sassy Sara. After she thinks Amanda is out of earshot though, she goes on to tell the make-up artist that she has a huge schnoz and it could hold her back. But of course Amanda actually hears this and begins internally freaking out.

Next day at school Amanda tells Busy about the nose stuff and how she is now considering a nose job. Busy of course is like “you’re an idiot” and tells her that she shouldn’t carve up her face just to make Ms. Van Dreesen happy. Amanda says she basically has to change her whole face to get work but Busy says it won’t be her real face. Honestly nowadays that doesn’t even matter so Busy’s point is pretty moot. Amanda then ends up dragging Busy to the rhinoplasty store.

So they go and Amanda gets right to it trying to book herself a nose job. The receptionist tells her that the doctor won’t see her until he speaks with her parent. Busy then asks the all important question of how much will it cost, with the answer being between $3000 to $5000. Amanda is utterly shocked at this. Stupid teenager.

Of course when Amanda mentions it to Phyllis she laughs in her face and says hell no. Phyllis says if she actually wants to make this modelling stuff work that Amanda needs to use her own body parts. Yeah, she definitely won’t get far in that business, this is way before Photoshop. A knock at the door and we finally meet Phyllis’ new (and finally last) beau, Stephen. Phyllis then puts both of them in an awkward position by asking Stephen to rate Amanda’s nose. More pointless chatter and then Phyllis leaves. So yeah, looks like short of some illegal activity, Amanda is not getting the funds for that nose job.

Later on, Busy is hanging out with Amanda and she’s trying on various noses which Busy remarks all look like Michael Jackson’s. Nah, these noses have actual definition and aren’t two holes in a skull. Busy asks Amanda how she would be paying for the nose job if her mom isn’t giving her the money and she said she’d get the agency to cover it and she’d pay them back after she got her first job. Would an agency actually do this? I feel like they’d have to have a lot of faith in their newbie model. Busy mentions how Sheila’s step mom has had about 10,000 plastic surgeries on her face and as a result it has basically no natural movement anymore but Amanda doesn’t care, because it’s about that cash flow with her.

A short scene afterwards has Amanda at an audition, but this time it’s for some weird foot fetish ad. We also see this girl Angelique who I guess is the top model of this agency.

Back at school Amanda’s trying on various noses and Carla comes by and bugs her to vote of some stupid spirit squad thing, but not before seeing this and remarking that Amanda would look great with a pug nose haha.

Amanda actually lands that foot ad and has to deal with some awkward poses for the photographer. I guess this is to show that everyone starts at the bottom and you won’t be getting Vogue covers your first day.

As to be expected, afterwards Amanda has some major foot cramping from pointing her toes for 20 minutes. As she’s sitting there rubbing them Angelique comes by and starts doing her make-up. She remarks that Amanda is lucky to get foot work as she never does cuz her feet are gross and full of worts (k she doesn’t say that but she did say she doesn’t get foot jobs). Amanda is surprised that someone so beautiful and perfect wouldn’t get every job and Angelique replies that she isn’t perfect at all and is actually getting her nose and chin done tomorrow.  Angelique says she’s basically willing to do whatever it takes to make it in the business and you can tell Amanda is not at that same place as modelling is something she just randomly decided to try doing two days ago.

As a result, Amanda decides no nose job for her. She calls up Ms. Van Dreersen and leaves a voice mail saying her natural nose is staying but if she ever wants to use her again for some foot fetish shots she’s available. Amanda has accepted that for now she’ll have to live out her acting through community theatre. The episode ends with Busy trying to guess the various phases of a tornado while Amanda acts them out.

Overall I liked this episode. At least this time with Amanda’s modelling attempt it sorta went somewhere i.e. she actually got a gig, and also didn’t actually do something extreme like she did the first time with her mini eating disorder. Awww she’s very very very very slowly becoming wiser with age.

Sorry this was posted so late, I have gotten the flu TWICE this year so far, and this past week it really knocked me on my ass. I am only starting to feel better now. So I am hoping to have the next review out on time meaning before February is over.

Next episode, Manny ties the knot. Also featuring a very well known Canadian star who was super dorky in this role.

Season 4, Episode 3: Where Do I Belong?

Hello fam. Let us continue with this glacial pace that is the review of Season 4.

The episode opens with people rocking their goddamn asses off to Busy and “The Neons” aka Neon Vomit, who now have a new name. It appears that they also have a music video and it is called “Unleashed”.

This sounds anything but unleashed, as it’s a pretty generic drum solo going on, we don’t even get any of the Liz’s signature screeches. I’m pretty disappointed.

This sequence continues with Busy smugly walking down the hall at Dorsey, spitting on the little people who got in her way all these years.  We also get our first shot of Sag, who will be our new permanent addition to the cast, but more on him later.

Anyway, in case you couldn’t figure it out based on the grey images and ridiculous set up, this is yet another Ready or Not dream sequence. Lucy is heard calling to Busy in the distance, where we now see that Busy is actually playing the drums alone in her dank basement. I could tell pretty much right off the bat that this wasn’t real though, because as if anyone would ever give Neon Vomit a record deal. Busy tries to ignore her mom until Lucy finally pokes her head downstairs and tells her to get her goddamn ass to school.

So now the real opening which features Busy hustling into Dorsey where Petrocelli is seen handing out flyers for The Neon’s next gig. He tells her to get to work, as Amanda is no longer the band’s lackey and he needs Busy to put up and hand out posters for their show. We also see some dude named Brad who used to be the drummer in the band aka FORESHADOWING. P.S. When the hell did Brad play with them? Busy’s been their drummer since she was like 12, how long has this stupid band been in existence?

Busy gets to work handing out those Neon flyers… hey I just realized probably to promote THE NEONS, wow that’s clever. Anyway, Amanda and Nina are loitering around and ask for some “VIP passes” to the show. Considering this concert is most likely being held in Neon Vomit’s garage, I doubt they’ll have trouble getting in. Amanda also remarks that she can stay out late that night as Phyllis has wasted no time after dumping Mel and has gripped her talons into a new unsuspecting male.

We also find out that Amanda is going to be auditioning for some community theatre version of The Wizard of Oz (see I told you guys this acting shit was not going away). Nina eggs her on, saying that she’d be the perfect Dorothy, despite the fact that I’m pretty sure Nina has never seen Amanda act at all.

Oh yeah and Sag randomly comes out of nowhere and asks for a flyer. This show is really trying to make a point of saying it’s some weird type of destiny for Busy and Sag to meet even though basically nothing of importance ever comes out of them knowing each other.

Next scene is literally just Nina and Amanda being stupid in the bathroom, aka rehearsing the tornado scene from The Wizard of Oz. Amanda bellows “TOTO!” like a groupie at the concert of said band. I’m betting she possibly caused some poor frightened girl’s urine to retract back into her urethra with that screaming. Why do these characters literally have to do everything in the washroom? Does this school not have an auditorium?

At the Ramone residence, the family and Sheila are all gathered around inhaling their dinner. Busy then notices a rock on Sheila’s hand, and it turns out Manny is finally making an honest woman out of Sheila. Lucy breaks down in tears of joy, probably because she thinks she’s finally free of doing Manny’s laundry, and rushes over to congratulate/offer condolences to Sheila.

The couple also informs the fam that Manny can’t find work beyond the butcher shop and wants to move back in with the Ramone’s so they can save up a down payment for a house. Sam for some reason gets pissed at this i.e. them living together in sin under “his roof” even though they have been living in sin at an apartment and thus his logic makes no sense. Manny, with the insight of how the future will go for many Millenial’s, tells Sam that “everyone is doing it” aka moving home. Sam is still pissed at the idea though. Lucy tells him to STFU as they need to celebrate by getting sloshed on red wine. Frankie asks where they’ll go and Manny suggests the basement which immediately makes Busy mad as that’s where her precious drums are. Of course the conversation then becomes about said drums and how important they are blah blah blah we’ve heard this 10,000 times on this show. Lucy quickly shuts her up and they all go back to ignoring her feelings and celebrating.

Next day at school, Busy rushes up to Amanda and Nina to inform them of the news. Before Busy can give Amanda the 411 on the Manny situation, Nina spits out that Amanda got a role in the play. But alas she is not playing Dorothy. No, Amanda is playing the goddamn tornado. Busy does what anyone would do and laughs in Amanda’s face. Amanda gets all pissy, stating that Busy’s music isn’t the only important thing round these parts. But yeah, I agree with Busy, if my friend told me they were playing a weather event I’d laugh at them as well.

Later on in a short scene, Sheila reveals that she has no sisters/friends and asks Busy if she’d be a bride’s maid at her wedding. Busy says yes even though later on she’ll act like being a bride’s maid is the biggest fucking ordeal which it so wasn’t for her as she ends up doing nothing.

New scene and Nina and Amanda are at the Neon Vomit show. Busy is about to perform, when Petrocelli comes by and asks if Brad can play the first songs of their set which Busy says yes to even though you can tell she’s not happy about it.

Anyway, so Brad’s slightly less generic drumming has had quite the affect on these teens as they start cutting a rug to his jams. P.S. This is the same song from the dream sequence and I still find it weird that there is no singing in it at all. Brad does a cool little drum solo at the end and everyone starts losing their goddamn minds at this John Bonham reincarnate.

Finally Busy tells Petrocelli that Brad’s been playing three songs (when they said he would only play two) and that he needs to get his ass off the drum stand ASAP. Busy finally rejoins the group and starts playing a ditty, but it is too late; the crowd is drunk on the greatness that is Brad, and they begin to boo Busy and chant Brad’s name. I feel pretty bad for Busy in this scene, it was pretty dickish of the dudes to let Brad play before her. You can tell Busy is on the cusp of crying.

After the show, while Busy is off somewhere, the guys of Neon Vomit have wasted no time already trying to figure out a way to get her out of the band as Brad is now available. Doesn’t seem to matter to them that he was the one who left the band in the first place and is probably a total flake. What a bunch of douches. Amanda and Nina overhear them and ask where Busy is and they say she’s probably in the can, so they go off to find her. I just need to say though that The Liz is looking LEAGUES better with his short blue hair and also the fact that he is now speaking full sentences (I know he has been for awhile, but I always think back to that first episode we saw him in and remember how he was borderline a reptile before).

They wander off downstairs where Busy is hiding in a corner crying but can hear what they are saying. Nina is clearly all about attending some after party that the band is having as Brad will probably be there i.e. she doesn’t care at all about Busy. Amanda’s more sympathetic and says what I was thinking in that the band would be morons to dump Busy as Brad is clearly not reliable and will probably bail again. They give up looking after one second and head off to the party.

Suddenly we hear the faint sound of what sounds like a flute. Enter SAG “short for Sagittarius” and you will NEVER forget that because trust me, Sag won’t let you. Sag is literally every pretentious teenage high school boy wrapped up in a trench coat wearing package. He reminds me so much of guys I knew in my youth who thought everything they said was super profound. I feel like Sag will look back on his teen years and grimace (least I hope so, really hope he gains self-awareness when he becomes an adult). Anyway, so while he is probably the most cringey character on the show, I don’t hate Sag, I just find my eyes rolling into the back into my head about 90% of the time he is on the screen.

So yeah, Sag comes along with some weird flute thing and sits with Busy, letting her know that while the other guy had “flash” she was more “solid.” He then tells Busy that “it’s not easy becoming your future” and then walks off into the night. See, told you he’s full of shit. Also, I literally can’t tell if he’s chubby or if he just wears a lot of layers. This has bothered me since I first started watching the show.

The next morning the Ramone’s are all in piss poor moods because Manny is making Sam and Frankie help him move a futon into the basement. The door bell rings and it’s Petrocelli whose come to officially kick Busy out of the band. He tries to act all remorseful but Busy is not having it and slams the door in his face. She runs off to beat the living shit out of her drums in the basement. Manny comes and apologizes for taking over her space but you can tell Busy is on the cusp of having a freak out and runs upstairs. Amanda randomly stops by and is being super annoying with her stupid tornado rehearsing. It’s pretty obvious Busy is looking to take her anger out on someone, as she starts getting into it with Amanda by bringing up the fact that her and Nina were gushing about how good Brad was in the basement the night before. Amanda tells Busy she thinks she’s good too and Busy tells her to shut up as she knows she’s good and she’s sick of dealing with Amanda’s selfish artsy bullshit. Amanda tells Busy to call her when she’s not on her rag and takes off. Busy kicks some boxes because she’s pissed at the world and obviously can’t be a drummer anymore because some shitty garage band from Scarborough kicked her out.

Later on in her bedroom, Busy starts humming and creating a song to the melody Sag was playing on his didgeridoo when she encountered him in the basement. She gets frustrated and throws away the song within mere seconds. Lucy comes as she noticed her daughter is acting a lot more mopey than usual. They have a heart to heart about how Busy is feeling lost and feels like things are not easy. Lucy tells her that being an adult sucks and it doesn’t get easier but at least she has new adventures/disappointments to look forward to in her future. Lucy then suggests they take apart Busy’s bunk beds, I guess symbolizing that Busy is growing up. I wish they had decided to take an axe to her drum kit to symbolize that instead. Busy fishes out the song she was creating before and pins it on her bristle board. This will begin Busy’s new progression into becoming a song writer. Hopefully she does better than she did last season with Maxine.

The next day at school Nina has Amanda is this horrendous tornado costume that Amanda is actually going to wear to her audition. Busy tries to hold back her laughter after Nina runs off to get shit ready at the theatre. Amanda is upset because A. She looks crazy as hell and B. Busy is still mad at her. Busy tells her she’s not mad anymore, she was like having a pre-mid life crisis and took it out on Amanda. She then tells Amanda that Manny is getting hitched and she is going to be a bride’s maid. Amanda of course is ecstatic at that since she lives major life events through Busy and her family. Amanda runs off to the audition and the episode ends with Busy seeing Sag in the hallway and talking about music or some crap.

This episode was meh for me, mostly because I don’t care at all about Busy’s music stuff and that was the entire episode. I guess I will miss seeing The Liz, but now that he’s normal he’s pretty boring so good riddance Neon Vomit.

P.S. These last two weeks have been a whirlwind (much like Amanda’s costume) for me. I got married October 28th and then this past Monday I had to put my cat to sleep. So yeah, I am happy to be writing in this blog because it’s a good distraction and attempting to be funny makes me feel better. Thanks for reading everyone who still does/new readers.

Season 4, Episode 2: The Grass Is Greener

Hi guys. Remember how I said the next review would be in March? Well I actually meant August.

Anyway, this episode is probably my favourite of season 4, I just find it highly entertaining. Let us go forth with the review!

The episode opens with Amanda telling Busy that Phyllis finally got bored of Mel’s penis and has broken up with him. Apparently she’s being super emo about it as now all she does is hum sad music. Busy goes on to point out that at least Amanda’s mom talks to her like an adult, as Busy’s family literally only cares about watching basketball and forcing Busy into involuntary slave labour. They go on to discuss how each of their family’s have their own mental aspects and how the other girl is the lucky one to be part of a normal family unit. For example, Amanda is jealous of Busy’s massive family and her hot ass brothers and Busy is jealous that Amanda gets the privacy and attention of an only child. Somehow this family talk turns into them making a bet that involves switching families for the weekend, as each girl believes the other one would not be able to handle their family. The terms are if Busy wins, Amanda cleans out Busy’s contaminated locker and if Amanda wins she gets to borrow Frankie’s jacket to which she will most likely sew onto her body.

 

Awww their special handshake! We haven’t seen that since….two episodes ago.

Next scene is Amanda telling Phyllis about the switcheroo, but for some reason Amanda lied and said it’s for a school assignment, which leads Phyllis to be annoyed at the lack of a school note. I don’t get why Amanda would need to lie since Busy’s been her friend since they were fetuses and I doubt it’s a huge deal if they just decided to do this weird bet on their own accord.

Amanda tells Phyllis to make sure she’s her usual harpy self, as Busy needs to get the real experience of what life is like for Amanda.

There’s a short scene thereafter with Busy and Lucy saying the same type of thing, meaning Busy wants Amanda to experience the hijinxs of being a Ramone.

The girl’s meet up next day in their office washroom setting and set up some ground rules like no going through private things (yeah, right) and no calls home if the other one can’t take it. They exchange keys and are off on their own little social experiment.

Busy arrives to Amanda’s place first, where there is peace and quiet as Phyllis hasn’t gotten home from work yet. Phyllis has a little tape recorder set up for Busy telling her she’s looking forward to spending the weekend with her “new daughter.” Busy of course is stoked as she doesn’t have a million people in her face and can actually breathe.

Amanda arrives at the Ramone’s and as usual much activity is afoot, such a Frankie looking for a lost juggling ball (you dodged a bullet with this one Amanda girl), Lucy running off to class and Sam eating salami on a newspaper with a massive bottle of Pepsi. I dunno why but I enjoyed that touch, seemed like such a thing a dad would do. Clearly no one cares about what Busy says, as all of them are surprised at Amanda’s presence. Eventually they all go do their respected tasks while Amanda beams at the energy of such a “passionate” family (her words).

The next scene shifts back to Busy and Phyllis and Phyllis discussing all these art galleries that she plans on taking Busy to, which Busy is excited about as she hasn’t had any culture since going to the Pioneer Village gift shop at the age of 10. Oh how I miss that place, I feel like that was a staple field trip location for Toronto youths back in the day.  Phyllis is also being a super hippy and gets really into some candle she probably bought at Bed Bath and Beyond but is acting like it has the aura’s of the universe. Busy just starts hacking as a result of it.

Amanda starts taking her entrance to the Ramone family into incestuous territory as she gives Frankie’s dirty jersey a big ol’ sniff and then kisses a random picture of Dom.

The next day Phyllis wakes Busy up at 6:30am to beat the “art gallery crowds.” Is this a real thing? Can’t see people waking up at the crack of dawn to go to an art gallery.

Amanda wakes up and there’s already a line up for the washroom as Sam is in there taking a thirty minute crap. Frankie pulls out a piece of paper from his boxers and gives it to Amanda. It’s an I.O.U. from Busy and it’s to clean his room. Awww there was once a moment when Amanda would’ve jumped for joy at being able to touch Frankie’s dirty underwear.

Switching back to Busy and Phyllis, Phyllis applies some face masks that makes them resemble Blue Man Group rejects. Then they head to the art gallery which is full of pretentious looking extras. Guess everyone really did wake up to hit the gallery. Phyllis walks around looking impressed by things that look like giant wheels, while Busy stands around bored out of her mind chewing bubble gum.

Phyllis becomes horrified with how uncouth Busy is and runs off to another exhibit. Busy decides the best place to dispose her gum is in an art piece that looks like a coffin made out of fishing line.

This screen shot of Phyllis is hilarious, she looks so shocked that Busy is not enthralled with whatever the hell it is this art exhibit is suppose to be showing. Also there’s the coffin thing Busy sticks her gum in, haha.

Meanwhile, Amanda is struggling to survive at the butcher shop carrying heavy meat, while Manny sits around talking on his massive phone to Shelia. Amanda then screams like a banshee at the sight of a giant pig dangling from the ceiling. I kinda have to agree with her, this seems like something that would be hanging in the middle of the house from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Why’s a huge pig just hanging in the middle of the floor on display? I dunno, I am not up on butcher shop Feng Shui so maybe this is normal.

Back to Busy and what appears to be a new art gallery. She’s still bored out of her skull and decides to wipe out the headphones and probably some new U4EA to listen to. The flamboyant tour guide doesn’t appreciate her antics though and Phyllis quietly tells her to cut it the fuck out. P.S. I wish I could make a gif of Busy dancing awkwardly. I have never seen someone move around so much while listening to headphones.

A short scene we switch back to the butcher shop and Amanda’s having trouble with an elastic band. Sam basically wants to kill her now and sell her carcass to his customers.

Yet another art gallery, and Phyllis is clearly moister than an oyster and on the rebound as she’s resorted to flirting with this fruity as hell dude giving a live poetry reading. Busy just smirks as she is well aware of Phyllis’ needs for the D.

See, I wasn’t joking when I made all those comments about Busy being the Ramone’s slave, because in this scene Amanda is being forced to pour pop for Frankie, Manny and their random friends while they play cards. I understand more and more why Busy needed to escape that house, even if only for a weekend.

The scene shifts back to Phyllis and Busy who are now sitting around at home reading. Busy gets bored and tries to turn on the TV, only to discover to her horror that it is broken. Phyllis doesn’t really care, while Busy is on the verge of tears as TV is basically half her life.

Back at the Ramone’s, loud music is heard while Amanda is trying to sleep, causing her to fall out of the top bunk bed. She tries covering up her head with a pillow only to discover that Busy decided this was the perfect spot to stick her old gum, which results in Amanda getting it stick in her hair. Amanda’s truly having a shit time compared to Busy in this episode.

Ok so remember at the beginning they said no going through private things? (Well actually Amanda said that). Busy didn’t give one crap about that rule as she has found a hilarious gold mine of pictures featuring models Amanda has pasted her her head on. Right about this time we hear the phone ring and the music from the Ramone’s can be heard in the background but the caller promptly hangs up as soon as Busy says hello. Apparently Amanda has called five times and hung up so you know she’s dying right now.  Busy chuckles to herself as the worst she’s had to deal with so far has been a lack of television.

The next day in the morning Amanda is writing in her diary when Frankie comes barging in looking for his calculator. What is with this guy and his random lost items? First juggling balls and now this? Amanda gets pissed at his lack of respect for her privacy which prompts Frankie to grab her diary and start reading aloud. Apparently Amanda is trying to send “psychic messages” to someone named John. Frankie harasses her some more to reveal who the mysterious John is, and turns out it’s John F Kennedy Jr (RIP). Frankie then pulls out the Dom photo that Amanda kissed earlier which still has her lip marks on it and mockingly says that Dom will be so jealous. Amanda’s bout ready to explode and slams the door bitching at how goddamn messed up the Ramone family is.

Back at the Zimm residence, the worst Busy is having to endure today is having Phyllis read her foot. Seriously, compared to Amanda, Busy’s weekend has been a walk in the park. Anyway, Phyllis asks her some questions about herself such as what makes Busy excited to live. Busy is unsure how to answer that, considering no one in her own family ever actually cared to probe that deep in her life before. Busy says “her drums” and Phyllis gets all excited that they bonded. Now that she’s broken up with Mel she’s gotten lot more hippy dippy which I guess could be slightly annoying, but still better than literally one second of what Amanda has had to deal with from the Ramone’s.

Back at the Ramone’s, Amanda helping prepare dinner with Lucy while Frankie and Manny get in the way with their nerf football and Sam sit’s around bitching about something. Busy calls Amanda for some reason, even though it was against their rules and they chat about how each other’s weekend has been so far. The piano plays while Busy asks if Amanda wants to come home a bit early, so you can tell that they miss their regular fam jams. Amanda says no, she can survive a couple more hours of the Ramone’s (she hopes) and that she’ll see Busy in a bit.

Later on Amanda’s sitting around fidgeting her ass off waiting for her mom to come save her. Finally Phyllis shows up and Amanda practically bolts for the door to escape. Phyllis goes to speak with Lucy, while Amanda and Busy chat about how everything went. Both conclude that each other’s family’s are “intense” aka that neither one could put up with what the other one has to on the daily ever. They decide to have a draw on the bet since Busy did call, but Amanda did about 1740 hang up calls. Busy was so dumb to call IMO, she literally had this bet in the bag. Ah well. Amanda then bets her a month’s worth of homework that she won’t get the remote off her dad. Amanda and her mom leave, and the Ramones welcome back good ol’ Busy. Episode ends with Busy indeed getting the remote and everyone jumps ontop of Sam for some reason.

I really liked this episode, as it sort had a Freaky Friday feel to it. Ok not really, but seeing what it would be like to live your best friend’s life for a weekend is a pretty cool idea. I feel like since both the girl’s spent so much time at each other’s houses they expected totally different outcomes, so it was funny to see how it was to deal with each other’s family’s on a solo mission.

Ok so I started this entry back in May and it is now August. Really unacceptable. I had someone on Facebook actually contact me and left a really sweet message saying how much they hoped I would keep writing this and how good a writer I am. It made me realize I need to keep this alive, if anything to maintain my writing skills, and to continue to hopefully provide entertainment for the few but awesome who still continue to read. Thank you loyal friends.

Next episode: Busy has an identity crisis.

 

 

Season 4, Episode 1: First Day of Junior High

Hi guys.

I really dropped the ball on this website, didn’t I? I don’t think I’ve updated since September…ooops. And yet somehow, this website still gets at least 20-30 hits a day. That gives me joy.

Anyway, just know that it’s not from a lack of love  that I quasi-abandoned this site, it’s because I’m now working two jobs and trying to plan for a fall wedding this year… so yeah. Stupid busy.

But I really enjoy working on this site, and I miss watching Busy and Amanda annoy me for half an hour, so I am back! I promise at least one monthly update. I know that’s shitty, but I think it’s reasonable for myself.

Anyway, it’s good to be back, and let’s get the ball rolling.

We’re now in Season Four… I can’t believe it, as the series is more than halfway over now. I find that this season the show takes a drastic change. I’m not saying it’s better or worse, it’s just….different. In addition to Amanda and Busy now sporting much more trendy hair styles and clothing, the story line’s seem a lot less endearing and more basic teen drama. I dunno how to explain it, maybe it’s just me but I prefer the earlier seasons. Not that these seasons don’t have some good moments, but a lot of random characters get introduced and it sort of draws away from Amanda and Busy’s friendship. Also, one thing I noticed is how Amanda and Busy kind of switch personalities. Amanda becomes a lot more confident in these seasons (to a degree, Amanda will always be a little self-doubting) but Busy seems to totally lose her identity and really questions who she is. Anyway, you guys decide for yourselves.

So yeah, new season, and now, a new opening!

 

…………Which I can’t link to as I can’t find it on YouTube. 😐 But since these episodes are on YouTube again, you can go watch for yourself. Basically instead of the photo booth intro it is now various clips from the episodes this season. Don’t worry though, that great song still remains.

So the episode opens with Amanda and Busy discussing clothing and their upcoming first day at their new school, Dorsey Jr. High. You’ll notice right away that the gals are sporting totally different hairdos. Busy has lost her moppy curls and has a straightened bob, while Amanda has cut off a chunk of her hair and has layers now. I have to say, I really enjoy Amanda’s style in these newer seasons, as she wears clothes I myself would’ve enjoyed in the mid to late 90s.

 

Much like every stupid Canadian tween show, there always has to be some dumb reason these kids can’t go to a real high school. In this case, it’s because of some “rezoning law.” Despite the fact that they live in Toronto, the biggest city in Canada, they can’t find a high school that will take them in. SURE. I literally have no idea why the show made them not go to a high school as they ended up at a new damn school anyway! At least with Degrassi they were still at the same school when they pulled this similar stunt. Maybe they didn’t want to have to get into serious high school story lines, and having them be in Jr. High was a way to keep them innocent for like a year longer… Anyway, moving on.

So Frankie barges in bitching about Busy using his razor. Busy mocks his lack of facial hair on account of his lack of masculinity, and Frankie uses this as the basis for the dumb plot of this episode. He tells Busy to watch her back, as the Famagletti’s go to Dorsey. The Famagletti’s are an Italian family who hate the Ramone’s for some reason, and Frankie goes on to tell how two of the Famagletti’s kicked the crap out of Manny and Dom, all the while this Godfather type music is playing in the background. He succeeds in somehow convincing Busy that they’re all at Dorsey, waiting to beat her ass. Does this look like dude you would actually believe?

Next day we see the girls walking down the hall at Dorsey, and I’m sad to say that we were not able to escape having to deal with Monkey Ears. In fact, you better learn to love him because he’s in the rest of the show all the way to the BITTER END. Plus, he’s now much more of a secondary character, as the show loves to add those in these last two seasons. He’s also about 10,000,000,000 x more annoying now. So yay, already lovin’ season 4.

Yep, here’s a man who definitely will not be having sex any time soon.

Amanda and Busy then arrive at Amanda’s locker (they aren’t together, much to Busy’s chagrin), when one of our new character’s makes an appearance. The show doesn’t come right out and say who she is, because of this stupid Famalgetti plot, but I’m gonna tell you her name is Carla Slavinski and I guess she’s sort of the antagonist, at least for Busy because these two never end up really getting along. Carla tells Amanda this is “her block” and steals Amanda’s locker away like a stupid ass hoe.

So the girl’s go over to the locker Carla dumped on Amanda and apparently it reeks. Amanda goes to put her disc man inside, but then is greeted by some new chick who tells her not to do that because the locks don’t work at this ghetto ass school. Anyway, this is the show’s way of introducing another character, Nina Pepperman, who will become the girl’s bff for a bit of this season. So I’m gonna be super un-PC and point out that Nina looks like she has dwarfism to me. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing at all, she just looks like a little person. It would’ve actually been awesome if they had a dwarf as a friend on this show, not gonna lie. Would’ve been better than that annoying dude in the wheelchair in a future episode, but y’all will just have to wait and see for that one. So anyway, Nina walks off and everyone is all “SUP NINA” while the screen gets all glowy, so I guess she’s super popular or something.

Carla then like randomly runs up to Amanda and Busy and tells them that Nina Pepperman is stuck up and to stay away from her. I don’t get why they instantly didn’t tell her to fuck off after the stunt she pulled with the locker seconds ago, but I digress. Carla is kind of a loser; like she makes fun of the girls, but constantly hangs around them.

They arrive to class, and we see the main teacher for these seasons, Mr. Clemmer. He is an OCD candidate who seems to have to repeat everything twice. As he’s discussing random shit, Amanda accidentally hits her foot on her disc man causing it to turn on. Busy, sitting right behind her turns it off. Clemmer thinks Busy did it and asks her name, forcing her to say aloud that her last name is Ramone while the stupid Godfather music plays in the background. I’m already so bored of this stupid Famagletti subplot. Clemmer than tells everyone to get into groups of three and Nina joins up with Amanda and Busy. Carla being obviously friendless, has no group so Clemmer sticks her in their group and Carla starts annoying people right off the bat.

In the next scene Busy and Amanda are bitching about how annoying Carla is, while banging on the bathroom door to get Frankie out since he is “shaving” again. I feel like the shaving is a cover for something else he is probably doing, as he is at that very special age in a man’s life. Anyway, Frankie opens the door and warns them again that the Famagletti’s are on to Busy and she should be shitting her pants in fright at these fictional characters.

Next day is photo day and the four gals are all waiting around to git it done. Carla asks to borrow Amanda’s cover stick as she has “pores the size of dinner plates” (comment will become important later on) to which Amanda makes up some bullshit excuse because who would want to share their make-up with Carla? Nina goes up to get her pic taken and Carla starts going on about meeting up to do the project without Nina as I guess she hates her or something, and Busy and Amanda come up with an excuse not to hang out with Carla on account of her sucking. Amanda then goes up to get her picture taken, and see’s Carla fucking licking her hair for some reason which rightfully grosses her out and causes her to make a weird face.

Then Busy goes and shuts her eyes like a dolt.

After their shitty pictures, Amanda Busy and Nina take off to grab food and leave behind their photo IDs to be taken by ANYONE like possibly the FAMAGLETTI’S(except not).

So they go to this place called The Lakeview, which is a real diner in Toronto (and pretty damn good, went here once in like -30C weather…twas worth it) and sit around listening to Nina sound super pretentious talking about her past career as a barista. As a current barista I’ll tell you it’s nothing to brag about. Some shady looking folks walk in and Busy gets paranoid that it’s the Famagletti’s. Does she think they have a hit out on her or something? Nina then asks if they wanna go to some Japanese tea ceremony tomorrow because of course this 14 year old is into stuff like that. Anyway, they get on the topic of Carla, and start discussing how much of a loser she is, with Amanda and Busy  chiming in with the “dinner plates” comment from before. Of course right as they are bad mouthing her, Carla walks in and hear’s everything. The girls don’t see her, and you can tell Carla is pretty hurt, but screw her, Carla was an asshole right off the bat. Zero sympathy. I also think it’s kinda hilarious that her friend is also smirking at the comments. Clearly everyone hates Carla.

The following day at school, Amanda and Busy are in the washrooms discussing some random crap, when all of a sudden Amanda finds a photo copy of Busy’s horrid photo from the ID pictures yesterday.

Geez, Busy looks high out of her mind in that picture.

They go confront the photographer about their IDs and it turns out someone has taken Busy’s as well as Amanda’s. The logical thought for them is to instantly go straight to thinking the Famagletti’s did this, when it’s pretty obvious who the damn culprit is. Monkey Ears than walks up to the girls brandishing a photo copy of Amanda’s ID. Turns out neither girl was immune to the attack, as both their pictures have been plastered up all over the school.

They freak out and tear down the pictures and then go to lunch. Turns out they are basically social pariahs now, as no one lets them sit with them except for good ol’ Carla.

They’re sitting around when suddenly some thuggish (for Canadians) guys stand up and Busy freaks out and takes off because she thinks it’s the Famgletti’s. But turns out they were just putting up a poster for their Christian rock band, at least that’s what I will assume based on this picture.

Amanda and Carla more or less shrug off Busy’s panic attack and carry on discussing how redonks it is that someone would want to trash someone else’s reputation. Carla then goes off to “gargle” and leaves Amanda with her trash like a common troll.

Later that night, Amanda is already ready to give up on Dorsey after being humiliated and wants to move in with her dad. Come on Amanda, you survived having your bra thrown around a classroom, I think you can handle this. Phyllis comes in and demands the phone since she and Mel are basically on the cusp of breaking up and she wants to yell at him for being late for the opera or some lame ass shit.

Over at the Ramone’s, Manny is over and raiding the fridge since he still can’t care for himself, despite nearing the age of 45. He asks Busy why she’s all mopey and she tells him the Famgletti’s are bringing her down. Manny is basically like “what the hell are you talking about?” and Busy brings up the Famagletti’s and how they kicked his ass once. Manny says the Famagletti’s are non-existent and no one ever kicked his ass, but you can totally tell Manny is one of those annoying alpha males who would never admit if they did lose a fight. Anyway point being, it finally took Manny saying something for Busy to realize Frankie was bullshitting the whole time. I feel like past Busy would’ve figured this out a lot sooner. Also we get some mini insights into the Ramone family as Lucy is now going to school and Sam has started grocery shopping, probably for the first time in his life. Yay Ramone family succeeding.

So now that the idiots have finally caught about the fictional Famagletti’s they then try to figure out who put up all the posters. First they come to Monkey Ears, but he tells them that he has better things to do, like run a shitty joke shop out of a suitcase at a junior high school. Then Carla comes up and basically implies that Nina did it, which makes absolutely no sense, but I guess if they believed some fantasy Italian mobsters could’ve done it than anyone could.

They all go into class and it seems like Busy and Amanda are seriously considering Nina as the culprit since she was away from school at her Japanese tea ceremony aka cosplay convention. Carla starts bitching that she was the only one who started their project and Nina goes to look at her work when suddenly 10,000 posters fall out of Carla’s binder. Wow… like who didn’t see that Carla was doing this from a mile away?

Amanda and Busy burst a blood vessel and freak out on Carla. At first she kind of tries to deny it, but then she comes out and says dem bitches had it coming because of their remarks at the diner. Somehow the music turns all guilty and regretful since they hurt Carla’s feelings but CARLA STARTED IT BY BEING AN ASSHOLE FIRST. If Amanda and Busy were just picking on some poor random weirdo that never bothered them than fine, they are bitches, but Carla was a jerk right off the bat with the locker shit and by being generally unpleasant to be around. They were never friends with her, if anything the only connection they had so far was being forced do a stupid project with her.  Carla is apparently allowed to go around being a giant twat to everyone, but the second someone hurts her fee fee’s it’s not ok. Anyway, she has a major suck out and leaves the class, but not before calling Amanda and Busy “wannabes”.

Later on Busy is setting up her shaving cream trap she purchased from Monkey Ears to get back at Frankie for the Famagletti stuff. Amanda says how she feels bad about the Carla incident, but Busy has the same frame of thought as me in that Carla is a douche who deserves it. Frankie barges in to shave for the 100th time (how does he not have razor burn) and we hear him spray what looks like purple Gak all over himself. Remember GAK guys?? (let’s see just how many early 80’s babies read this)

The episode ends with Amanda and Busy trying to hold back Busy’s door while Frankie attempts to break through and beat their ass, all the while talking about what a freak Mr. Clemmer is.

Anyway, I find this episode truly annoying, mostly because of the stupid Famagletti plot line. But then again I find that when episodes have to introduce new characters they usually aren’t the greatest, so maybe that’s why. It just felt like too much stuff was going on in this episode.

I feel soooo rusty with the writing right now haha. Next episode is actually probably one of my favourite of this season so I am looking forward to doing that in March. Hope someone out there is still reading this!

Season 3, Episode 13: Nothing In Common

Hi guys. Well, we’ve finally reached the end of my beloved season three. You can kiss the old school Amanda and Busy good bye after this episode. Their attitudes change, their style changes, their hair do’s definitely change and overall the show as a whole feels like it changes. It’s still good, but I think it loses the charm these earlier seasons hold.

But I’m getting ahead of myself, we still have one more episode of this season to tackle, so let’s get on with it.

The episode opens with Amanda and Busy sitting at a creek, that seriously reminds me of Taylor Creek in Toronto. Amanda is forcing Busy to listen to her mediocre poetry, and Busy’s acting her usual annoyed self with Amanda’s antics. Amanda’s disappointed that Busy wasn’t impressed with her poetry, but what can she expect? Busy never enjoys anything artsy Amanda attempts, like I’m sure she’s still traumatized by that Save the Animals song from the Wild Life episode in season one.

They randomly run into a homeless lady in the park, and Amanda gives her the poem because she’s a cheap bastard.

Amanda’s all excited because Busy’s Uncle Pasquale is in town and he’s a publisher….of cook books. But Amanda figures she can use some good old fashioned nepotism and charm her way into getting published in one of his cooking magazines. Busy tells her to calm the hell down, because her uncle is not in town just to help Amanda’s half-assed writing get published. But Amanda’s got a mission and there’s no way Busy is getting in the way of that.

Next scene, Amanda’s at Busy’s place having dinner and Uncle Pasquale is amidst the Ramone clan. He brings up some random song from Amanda and Busy’s youth about them being “best friends forever” (the theme of this episode) and they kinda groan at him remembering the stupid shit they said when they were seven.

Amanda wastes no time pointing out that she still writes and that she’s been working on some poems. Busy tries to shut her down, but is unsuccessful, as Amanda worms her way into getting Uncle Pasquale to read some of her poems. I don’t really get why Busy is trying to cock block Amanda’s writing. I mean, it is annoying that Amanda is trying to use Busy’s family to get published, but at the same time, it’s not that big of a deal. I’m sure Uncle Pasquale is just being nice, like reading one of her damn poems isn’t going to take up his day. Anyway, Uncle Pasquale then starts eating some corn in a really disturbing manner which makes the girls giggle since he apparently did this at a corn roast many moons ago.

Later in the eve, Amanda puts together a little care package of literally every poem she’s ever written in her life, including some ribbons about winning poetry contests, in case Uncle Pasquale doesn’t recognize how talented she is y’all.

The next day at school during lunch, Amanda presents Busy with her poetry package, and as usual Busy doesn’t give a shit. Amanda catches glimpse of a cassette that Busy has, which Busy seems weirdly uncomfortable about. Amanda gets it out of her that it is music she and some chick named Maxine are working on. Amanda really wants to hear it and even offers to write lyrics for Busy, but Busy turns her down saying the way she writes wouldn’t work for the music. Amanda is still really insistent on hearing the tape, and Busy begrudgingly gives in. I think because Busy is so hyper critical of Amanda’s art she’s worried Amanda will judge her (and rightfully so, because we later learn Busy really sucks at lyric writing).

Suddenly some random Asian chick named Wendy sits herself next to the girl’s table. I don’t think this is the same chick who was the “Oooo tough luck” one from the Danny pimple episode, but I think she was the one who schooled Amanda in the Jewish episode. Anyway, Wendy has come up with some book club idea that she thinks is super not nerdy at all. Amanda thinks it’s rad and offers to be a member, but Busy thinks it is hella lame and takes off.  Uh oh, AMANDA AND BUSY DON’T LIKE THE SAME THINGS. WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN?

Shortly after, we see Amanda and Wendy sharing a Walkman and listening to Busy’s tape, as Wendy loudly and openly mocks the lyrics. Busy is at a water fountain and hear’s everything. I don’t think it was very cool of Amanda to listen to that tape with Wendy, when Busy is clearly the type of person not comfortable sharing her art. At the same time, Busy’s been acting pretty bitchy towards Amanda lately so I’m not surprised it occurred. Anyway, of course Busy is pretty pissed at this situation. Also, what is that person behind Wendy in this screenshot?

After school Busy meet’s up with Maxine, whose trade mark is a monotone voice and a stupid hat. Amanda manages to catch Busy before she takes off  to “jam” with Maxine, because Busy forgot the poetry package at the lunch table. Busy tells Amanda she’ll give it to her uncle after she’s back from Maxine’s, but Amanda being her usual selfish self, whines at Busy to please go home first and give it to her uncle because it is important to her. Busy reminds Amanda/every viewer for the 10,000th time that her music is important too. Busy eventually just lies and tells Amanda she’ll go home first. Amanda then gives Busy back her tape and in a super phony manner tells Busy how great she thought it was. Busy see’s right through her bullshit and takes off with Maxine. So yeah, some tension is definitely brewing between these two girls, and honestly, it’s been in the making for awhile now. I feel both of them are probably a real chore to be friends with sometimes.

Busy and Maxine then ride their bikes through that same ravine/park Busy and Amanda were in at the beginning of this episode. Amanda’s poetry package was on some really flimsy looking back part of Busy’s bike and falls off and her poems scatter everywhere, unbeknownst to Busy.

Amanda later stops by Busy’s place, and is now basically harassing Busy about these poems and Uncle Pasquale. Busy’s getting mighty fed up with Amanda and her poetry shit, and tells her Uncle Pasquale is at some convention and isn’t even home yet. Amanda then decides she should just give him the poems herself, and Busy tells her they are on the bike. Amanda notes their absence and Busy is basically like DERP.

They return back to the ravine and Amanda’s poems are all over the place and completely ruined. Busy feels really bad and offers to make new one’s but Amanda apparently didn’t have copies. This would not be an issue in this day and age I must say. They then start getting into it, with Amanda saying Busy never cared about her poetry and Busy being pissed that she and Wendy made fun of her tape. Amanda says it was basically retaliation for insulting her poems at the dinner table the night before, which Busy didn’t actually do. Busy then says her and Wendy are perfect for each other because they are boring boy crazy book worms and Amanda says Busy and Maxine are boring, and that Maxine doesn’t talk. Busy tells her she’s thankful for that because she’s grown weary of listening to Amanda’s bullshit 24/7. They then leave each other on that bad note.  I’M NOT KIDDING….WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN? Seriously guys…I’m so scared. Will they survive this rift?

The next day Amanda arrives at school in full Claude Tanner from Degrassi High attire. She meets up with Busy at their lockers and they both exchanges bags with the stuff the other had left at their homes. So basically, they are acting like a couple breaking up and returning items.

Later on Amanda is walking with Wendy and see’s Busy with Maxine so invites Wendy over to read poems. So Busy asks Maxine if she wants to jam. Both are trying to make the other one jealous I’m assuming. Definitely acting like a former couple. I wish they’d just accept their feelings for each other and date already.

So then Wendy is at Amanda’s reading some boring ass poem that could be used to induce a coma. Seriously, look at Amanda, she looks like she’s about to fall asleep.

We then switch to Busy and Maxine where they are jamming along. Interestingly, Busy is now playing keyboard instead of drums (she’ll be playing keyboard a lot more in future episodes, so I wonder if this was a coincidence or the show planned this) and while the music is actually decent…the lyrics are….yeeeeah. I’ll let you guys judge:

You’re such a bore, don’t come ’round no more, just walk out that door, like you did, before.

No wonder Amanda and Wendy made fun of the lyrics. Even Busy thinks it might rhyme too much, but Maxine says that lyrics should rhyme, and Busy is very easily satisfied with that half-assed reasoning.

Then we get a sort of montage of the girls doing things they like with their mini me’s aka Amanda rating boys and doing make-up with Wendy and Busy playing video games and listening to U4EA (remember that band?) with Maxine.

Next day at school, Busy is playing Pogs with Maxine (“remember ALF, he’s back, in Pog form!”), while Amanda is partaking in the book club with Wendy and some other nerds. They both look at each other longingly from the across the cafeteria, missing each other’s annoying tendencies.

Later on, in a pretty random scene, Maxine and Busy are walking through that damn ravine again. Seriously, what’s with this location? They’ve never been there before and now everyday they are hanging out here. Busy points out how Amanda gives that homeless lady money/her poems which makes Maxine scoff. Busy then kind looks like she has some epiphany that maybe Amanda is a good person and gives the homeless lady money too. I dunno, was this the scene they used to make Busy realize she’s kinda been an asshole lately to Amanda and should cut her some slack? I dunno, it felt really out of nowhere to me.

Then we see Wendy and Amanda reading poems and Amanda’s pretty much over this scene. She basically rolls her eyes at her own poetry and you can tell she’s bored as fuck by everything with Wendy. I guess Amanda is now realizing how dull of a person she actually is and needs Busy around to keep things interesting with her sassy attitude. See, these bitches need each other!

I think the last straw comes for Busy when she has Maxine over for dinner, and the Ramones are acting like freaks as per usual, and Maxine doesn’t roll with the punches like Amanda did. I guess it is pretty important to have a friend that can understand and relate to your family’s quirks.

A new scene, the girl’s are in class and the teacher comes up with an assignment to have the kids write about their most memorable birthday’s. Busy asks Amanda if she’s going to write about when they put Brandy to sleep. I really hope Brandy was a cat and not her grandma. Amanda asks Busy if she’s going to write about when she got her first drum kit. So yeah, obviously these two have been in each other’s lives since the dawn of time, and should just become damn friends again already.

Later on in the evening, Uncle Pasquale stops by Busy’s room and asks about Amanda’s poems. Busy lets him know that she and Amanda aren’t friends anymore because they have nothing in common. Uncle Pasquale points out the most obvious thing ever in that Busy and Amanda never had anything in common in the first place, and that’s why they were best friends, because d’uh opposites attract. This should be most evident by the fact that both girl’s are already bored of their clones after one week of hanging out with them. Uncle Pasquale then does a creepy wink and leaves, never to return again. Thanks for your pearl’s of wisdom, Uncle Pasquale.

In the last scene, both girls are at a coffee shop with their new friends, but keep looking at each other. Finally Amanda bails on Wendy, and Busy follows, dumping Maxine. They meet up outside, where they have awkward small talk. Amanda asks Busy how the song is coming and Busy admits the lyrics blow. Amanda tries to use an analogy of Busy being peanut butter and her needing some jam aka Amanda, but Busy’s a tad too dense to get it. Finally Amanda just comes out and asks if Busy wants help and she says yes. They both do their secret handshake from years gone by and become friends again. The episode ends with the girl’s casually walking down the street dissing both Wendy and Maxine haha.

I’m not going to lie guys, I have been writing this review since Labour Day weekend. I find this episode so incredibly tedious, it’s been hard to get through it. I really did not like this episode, it severely grated on my nerves. I’m wondering if the show did this episode of their friendship almost ending in case there wasn’t going to be another season, just because season 4 is the start of a whole new look for the show. Anyway, apologizes for taking a decade to do this review.

BUT I got exciting news! Y’all should go look for Ready or Not on Youtube, because yesterday I looked and was pleasantly surprised, that’s all I’m going to say. 😉

Next episode: SEASON 4, EVERYTHING CHANGES aka mostly just Amanda and Busy’s hair. The first episode is actually kind of stupid, but I’m looking forward to the review. Until then!

 

Season 3, Episode 12: Sister, Sister

Hi gang, sorry for taking for frickin’ ever to write this review. I cannot believe this is the second last episode of season three. Where has the time gone? Soon Amanda and Busy will completely change…and not for the better.

Anyway, let us focus on the now and this episode, so aptly named after the mid 90’s sitcom starring Tia and Tamara Mowry. Unfortunately this episode does not feature a sassy black lady by the name of Jackee.

The episode opens with Amanda and Busy talking about some upcoming concert Neon Vomit has on the weekend. I wonder what sexual favours The Liz had to perform in order to secure that gig. Amanda’s also decided that it is a brilliant idea to let Busy perm her hair. I know it was the 90s, but who the fuck still got a perm beyond the 80s? Anyway, Amanda wants curly hair because “everyone she knows has it”…wonder if that will be her excuse for when she acquires herpes in the distant future. But she points out that it isn’t nearly as “radical” as changing your name, which Phyllis has now done, going back to her maiden name of Myers. Busy asks Amanda if she will change her name too, but Amanda gets pissed, proudly proclaiming she will always be a Zimm. Oh yeah, and I forgot to point out the most important part of their conversation; Amanda will be meeting Mel’s daughter Leslie tonight and she has a dead mom (will matter later).

The next scene…and Amanda’s hair looks exactly how you’d expect it to, i.e. a deranged poodle.

Now that Phyllis is newly divorced, she is wasting no time washing every aspect of Leonard out of her life, starting with a purging of her closet. She goes to throw away some fugly sweater, which Amanda gets offended by since she and her dad picked it out for Phyllis. Maybe if you guys had better taste she wouldn’t be tossing it out.

Amanda then goes in her room and writes some emo diary entry about how she wishes her hair wasn’t fucked, that she didn’t have to meet Leslie and that her mom would quit pretending to be sad about the divorce. Yawn, next.

Next scene, and Phyllis and Amanda arrive to the restaurant. Amanda gets all whiny about the restaurant being really fancy, even though her outfit looks totally normal (other than her hair and her stupid Blossom hat). Mel comes waltzing up with “14 year old” Leslie in tow. Can this show please start casting people that sort of look their age? This girl looks like she’s in her early 20s. Anyway, Amanda seems to immediately take a disliking to Leslie, sort of snubbing her, and Leslie seems super fake, so I’m sure these two are going to get along swimmingly!

They have a boring dinner, where Amanda is forced to eat vegetables she doesn’t like.

Back at home, Phyllis is obviously trying to get this Mel/Leslie and Phyllis/Amanda dynamic to happen, because her and Mel want Amanda and Phyllis to spend the whole weekend at his place to bond. Amanda gets super pissed, because she wants to go to Busy’s concert. Phyllis pulls the whole “Mel and I would be soooooo disappointed” line. I don’t often side with Amanda, but I was pretty annoyed with this scene. Phyllis just got divorced and already is trying to force this new dynamic on Amanda who clearly hasn’t come to terms with the fact that her parents aren’t getting back together. Pretty selfish on Phyllis’ end I must say.

Amanda calls Busy to bitch about it (while she’s clipping her toe nails in the scene haha) to which Busy is pretty sympathetic. Busy then implies that Mel and Phyllis are probably banging, because they went to New York together and they are forcing interactions between the two daughters. Busy even goes so far as to suggest that maybe Phyllis will marry Mel and Leslie will become Amanda’s sister, which freaks Amanda right the hell out.

Next scene, Amanda and Phyllis has arrived at Mel’s artsy-fartsy pad. Leslie is playing a solo cello concert for Mel and Phyllis, and Mel suggests Amanda bring her things to Leslie’s room to sleep in. Both girls are pretty WTF at that, as it is clear that neither likes the other, but these adults are determined to force this union on their daughters so they can keep having sex and not feel guilty about it.

Amanda goes into Leslie’s room, and looks at a bunch of pictures on her wall from various moments in Leslie’s life. She comes upon a picture of Leslie as a child with her dead mother. Amanda gets tears in her eyes, and I guess starts wondering if Leslie is going to attempt to steal her mother for her own.

After the concert, Phyllis suggests that her and the girl’s should go shopping. Leslie totally burns Amanda’s sweater, saying they should buy her a new one, which makes Amanda mad haha. The sweater is ugly, just accept it.

They end up going to some shop that looks like it’s in Yorkville or something. Amanda points out a purple dress to Leslie that she likes in the display window, and then goes to find it in the store to try it on. But lo and behold, Leslie also likes the same dress and THAT CAN’T BE!!!! Amanda gets super bitchy and exclaims that she doesn’t want the dress anymore. I’m sorry, but get over yourself. Leslie doesn’t even live with Amanda, and there’s definitely been times I’ve bought the same thing as my friend because we both like it. Amanda’s being super immature here. The salesmen then makes the error of asking Phyllis if she wants him to wrap up the dress for her daughter aka Leslie, and Phyllis doesn’t correct him, which results in a look of betrayal from Amanda.

Later on, Amanda calls Busy to bitch about Leslie, saying how super fake she is and is trying to be all chummy with Amanda’s mom. Busy more or less says just deal with it and ignore Leslie since it’s only one more day. But we all know Amanda’s the queen of drama, so that will not be happening.

Amanda returns to the living room and looks at Mel’s photography while still sulking about the dress. Mel asks Amanda if she still wants to see his new shots at his studio because he needs “a good eye.” I gotta say, Mel is being really nice to Amanda considering that A. She’s being a brat and B. SHE FUCKED UP HIS CAR LIKE LAST WEEK.

As they start setting the table for dinner, shit is about to hit the fan. Leslie asks Mel to drive her to her friend’s house, to which Phyllis replies that she wanted everyone to watch a movie together. Because obviously this forced interaction cannot take a break for one second of this weekend. Amanda gets excited at this, because if Leslie goes out than she can go to Busy’s concert. But Mel agrees with Phyllis and says they should stay in and become the Brady Bunch. Phyllis hands Leslie some food she doesn’t like, which Leslie makes known and Phyllis tells her she doesn’t have to eat it if she doesn’t want to. This pisses Amanda off since Phyllis always forces Amanda to eat shit she hates, which makes sense because you’re her daughter you dumbass. Leslie tells Amanda to mind her own fucking business and both parents start getting annoyed at their kid’s behaviour. Leslie calls Amanda an “immature baby” (correct) and Amanda retorts back with calling Leslie a “snobby stuck-up” (also correct). Leslie tells Amanda she should GTFO because it’s not her house. Amanda then says “Maybe it’s your house, but she’s my mother. Just because you don’t have a mother doesn’t mean you can steal mine. She’s not yours and she never will be!” And runs out crying like an immature baby. I find this an extremely insensitive thing to say on Amanda’s part, but as always I will fall back on my “teenagers are stupid” reason. Dumb parents should’ve just let them see their friends and this all would’ve been avoided.

Amanda runs outside to sob and Phyllis follows. Amanda basically lays it out to Phyllis, saying she’s been acting weird since the divorce, forcing Mel and Leslie on her and she knows Phyllis is doing the nasty with Mel. Phyllis says yeah, she is, but Amanda will always be her family and the most important thing in her life. Phyllis says she loves Mel a lot and that it’ll take time for them to get used to Leslie and vice versa, to which Amanda replies “what if I don’t want to get used to her?” Phyllis kinda shrugs and is like “you’re not wrecking this for me!!!” aka looks sadly off into the distance knowing she’ll probably have to deal with future outbursts from Amanda.

Next scene is Amanda writing in her diary about how changing means growing up and she’s not ready. Well clearly not judging by that little spectacle you pulled earlier.

Amanda goes into Leslie’s bedroom where she awkwardly has to spend the night and asks Leslie if she is still awake, to which Leslie replies “d’uh my eyes are open.” Amanda tells Leslie she used to want a sister when she was younger, even wrote to Santa for one, but then one day she didn’t want one, and now she still thinks she doesn’t. Leslie then says she never wanted a sister, only a mother, but now she doesn’t really think she wants one anymore either. So it is clear they both still hate each other.

Amanda then gets in bed and says “Leslie….goodnight.” Way to not apologize at all for your actions, Amanda.

Ugh two Amanda-centric episodes in a row is too much for me. I’m so tired of her bratty behaviour. Thankfully the last episode is equally about Busy and Amanda and how they may be too damn opposite to continue their friendship. Will it survive???? (yes, come on, there’s two more seasons of this goddamn show). But tune in soon (probably) for the final episode of season three!

Season 3, Episode 11: Sweet Thirteen

Hola faithful readers. How are you enjoying the summer if you are in the northern hemisphere? It’s humid as hell here in the ol’ southern Ontario, so it’s good enough a time to sit in some air conditioning and to do a review. Off topic, but I randomly noticed that from here on out there are no more winter episodes of this show, which kind of makes me sad. Meh, anyway.

The episode opens with Amanda crocheting and giving her mom the stink eye as she flirts with her boyfriend, Mel. Mel and Phyllis are canoodling on the balcony, and Mel opens the door and tells “Mandy” to come outside, as they are discussing Amanda’s birthday party. “Mandy” doesn’t take too kindly to her new nickname, and her face expresses as such.

Hey man, I get it. I hated when people called me “Mel” as a short form for Melissa. MEL IS NOT A GOOD NICKNAME.

Anyway, she goes outside and they start discussing her lame thirteenth birthday party. Phyllis asks her what kind of food she wants, and she says dumb shit like hors d’ourves, because Amanda thinks she’s super sophisticated now that she’s leaving the pre-teen level. Mel offers to photograph the party, since that’s what he does as his day job, and Amanda shoots him down. Mandy then brings up that she doesn’t want her mom there at the party, and Phyllis says fuck no, since Amanda’s borderline special needs, and can’t be trusted alone. Amanda then shows her maturity by sticking her tongue out and stomping off in a sulky manner. Phyllis shakes her head, wishing she had gotten that abortion thirteen years ago.

Later on, Amanda is bitching to Busy about how Phyllis treats her like a little kid. Yeah…you’re fucking twelve! Apparently her dad treats her maturely though as he is taking her and Busy to a French restaurant for her birthday. Oo la la, you know Amanda probably harassed him into doing that. Amanda then takes out some dresser drawer and flips it over, revealing a letter she wrote herself when she was ten predicting what she would be like at thirteen. Do people actually care about their thirteenth birthday? I mean yeah, technically you are a teenager, but not really in a sense. You’re not in high school at thirteen. Sixteen is a much more memorable year than thirteen. But then I forgot this is Amanda, and she makes the biggest deals out the stupidest shit. I’m surprised she didn’t create a care package for herself for when she got her period.

Outside, Busy is leaving and Mel and Phyllis are washing his car and acting totally gross and PDA together. You know they’re banging on a regular basis. Phyllis waves Amanda over and tells her that they’re going to New York. Amanda gets all excited, as she thinks she’ll be heading to the Big Apple, only for Phyllis tell her fuck no, Mel and I are going, like we’d invite you to ruin our sexcapades. Of course Amanda is pissed, because Friday is her birthday, despite the fact that she’s staying with her dad and won’t even see her mom anyway, and Phyllis will be back Saturday for her party. But yeah, I know for a fact I would’ve been pissed too, it’s such a teenage girl thing to be so self-centred. Amanda is pouty, but accepts the fact that they are going, all the while writing “SMel” on Mel’s car because she’s such a bad ass. This reference will become important later on.

The next day in class, Busy and Amanda are waiting around for 10:52am, the time Amanda exited her mom’s vagina, to read the letter she wrote herself three years ago. They open the letter, and ten year old Amanda basically expected thirteen year old Amanda to be “an awesome French kisser,  have a boyfriend who drives, be a published poet and someone who played hooky”. Wow, what a twisted little ten year old she was. I guarantee no ten year old’s I knew were thinking these thoughts. They’re study hall or whatever ends, and Amanda decides she must live up to her ten year old self’s expectations and asks Busy to play hooky with her. P.S. The shadow’s on Busy’s face makes it look like she has jowls in this shot….eeesh.

They end up going somewhere and sitting on a bench, bored out of their minds. Why they didn’t go to Amanda’s house and watch daytime TV, I have no idea. That’s what me and my friends did when we skipped, and taped hilarious parts of TV shows.  Suddenly Busy spots three randoms who are apparently friend’s of her brother’s and freaks out, thinking they’ll rat on her. Of course, they really couldn’t careless about Busy’s ass. Anyway, their names are Wright, Reed and Joy. Wright is played by Paul Popowich, who recently in Canadian TV played Claire’s almost-rapist newspaper boss on Degrassi: The Next Generation. He was also a regular on the Canadian show Catwalk, which I mentioned before is an old favourite of mine. Wright asks the girl’s if they have any money for smokes, and Amanda whips out the twenty dollar bill her mom left for her. Wright immediately snatches it up, winking at her and saying “Thanks Mandy.” Amanda gushes because as long as it’s a hot guy, she doesn’t care what name he calls her. The group then offers to show off Joy’s artwork to the girls and they scamper off all excited at their hooligan behaviour.

They show the girls some snake that Joy had a dream about and spray painted on a wall. Busy exclaims that it looks “so real!” which made me laugh. It has a neon-pink belly! Wright comes back with smokes and snacks for his friends, spending all of Amanda’s money, and giving her back like fifty cents in change lol. But he did buy her some truffles, so I guess that makes it ok. Suddenly they see the cops and need to take off because they “hassle them.” Really doubt cops give a shit about teens skipping school. Although, these “teens” look about twenty-five, so maybe they are worried they are impersonating youths and trying to lure children into their lair.  Anyway, Amanda offers to bring them back to her place, and Busy gives her classic “WTF Amanda” look.

Amanda’s hanging out with Wright in her kitchen, making some Cheez Whiz hors d’ourves, while he raids her mom’s beer stash. Wright asks her why he’s never seen her at the plaza before, and she tells him she’s skipping because it’s her birthday and she just turned thirteen! You can tell he’s like “okaaaaaaaaay” but then goes with it and says they’ll party all night! P.S. Amanda makes the best face after she drinks the beer, wish I could capture it but it looks too blurry.

Amanda decides to call her dad and postpone their dinner for tonight, by lying and saying Busy is throwing her a surprise party, so they can keep hanging out with the Funky Bunch here. Busy seems none the thrilled at this idea, but Amanda’s pretty pleased at the bad ass she is becoming, tossing her letter into the wind and preparing to party all night long.

So I guess “partying” equals watching Reed and Joy make out, as we get an uncomfortably close-up shot of them French kissing. I guess Amanda could pick up some pointers from observing them. Amanda decides to mack on Wright a bit and goes outside onto the balcony and offers him another hors d’ourve. We then get this weird as hell shot of him eating it in slow motion, I guess in a sexy manner to Amanda? I have no idea.

Wright notices a sweet car in the parking lot and it turns out to be Mel’s which pisses Amanda right off. Wright then says it would be pretty sweet if she had keys to the car, and of course dumbass Amanda decides it’s a great idea to let an almost perfect stranger drive her mom’s boyfriend’s expensive-as-fuck car.

They then go on a joyride around the neighbourhood, screaming and waving at confused old people.

They totally end up driving past an area I used to live, and drive underneath the Gardiner Expressway so Joy can do some more mediocre spray paint art. Busy offers to be on the look-out for cops and Wright offers Amanda the option to spray paint. Wright then suggests she spray paint onto Mel’s car. Then these assholes flat out lie and tell Amanda the paint can be washed off with soap and water, despite it being indelible. Poor gullible Amanda totally falls for it, and goes to work painting “SMELL” on the car.

Busy walks over and is like “What in God’s name are you doing??” And Amanda all joyfully is like “Don’t worry it’s indelible!” To which Busy replies, “like permanent?” and Amanda’s face just drooooooooops.

Driving back, Amanda’s clearly silently freaking out over the car stuff. Wright decides that having the car damaged is not enough, he must kill everyone as well, and decides to “cheer up” Amanda by speeding down a residential road. He gets up to almost 100km which is insane on a city street, and does a donut. Amanda freaks out and tells him to drive their asses home now. Fun and games are over!

They get back to the apartment, and Amanda basically tells the group to fuck off and they leave. I know Amanda’s a pretty bad judge of character, but this was probably one of the worst examples of that. I dunno how she thought it was normal to let these random “teens” drive Mel’s car, even if she does hate him. Amanda tells Busy she hopes they think vandal’s marked up the car.

And sure enough, they do! They don’t even seem to have one slightest suspicion that Amanda was the culprit. Score one for Mandy! They don’t even get the “SMELL” reference, referring to it as “gang code” haha.

Busy comes by later on and asks Amanda how it went. Amanda tells her they think vandals did it, which Busy replies is great. But you can tell Amanda’s being eaten up by her guilt. Busy tells her to forget it, because Phyllis would’ve caned her if she had told the truth, and she’s lucky they fell for the vandals bullshit. But apparently Smel convinced Phyllis to actually go out tonight and let Amanda have her unchaperoned party, because they think she’s so mature now…pfft.

Anyway, I guess now Amanda displays some real maturity, because she totally ‘fesses up to Mel about spray painting his car. She even tells him about her SMELL nickname for him. I’m gonna tell you all right now, no matter how old I was, if I was in this situation, no way in hell would I confess if the people already thought vandals did it. “The truth will set you free” my ass. Amanda did it to make herself feel better, there’s no way Phyllis or Mel got anything out of learning the truth, other than discovering Amanda is still an immature brat.

The episode ends with Mel and Amanda having their serious convo. I kind of wish Mel shoved her off the balcony to be honest.

So this episode was lame. Amanda was extremely gullible and chose once again to hang around with bad seeds who brought nothing of value to their interaction. I don’t care about Amanda’s “growth” either, because if she was actually mature, she wouldn’t have done like 90% of the things she did in this episode. Oh well, can’t blame teens for being stupid.

Next episode: Amanda meets Mel’s daughter and they hate each other.

 

Season 3, Episode 10: Just Friends

Hi loyal readers. Apologizes as per usual with the lack of entries as of late. I started a new job this week (which I am feeling very “meh” about), and general mental health good times. So now that I’ve gotten my usual excuses out of the way, let us begin.  P.S. I can’t believe Season 3 is almost done, so sad my favourite season is soon coming to an end.

The episode opens with Busy and some random cute boy discussing some nameless band they both like, and how their favourite song is something called “Shattered Heart.” That sounds like the title of a really bad country song. I’m cautiously curious what this band sounds like. Anyway, the guy’s name is Jamie, and he’s played by Mik Perlus, who played Victor on a pretty “popular” (by late 90s Canadian TV standards) show called Student Bodies (which also featured Ross Hull aka Danny playing a slightly less annoying character). Anyway, it was a pretty decent show that I recommend if you are bored.

Anyway, back to this show, so Jamie and Busy are playing baseball, and you can tell they have a pretty good dynamic, in a purely platonic fashion as evident by Jamie treating Busy like a total dude. They even have their own stupid handshake… if that doesn’t scream absolutely no sexual chemistry I don’t know what does.

Suddenly along comes Amanda, wearing her latest Shakespeare in Love attire. They have some boring idle chatter, and Amanda mentions she likes baseball. Jamie tells her to try to hit a few balls. She stands there in worst batter’s stance I’ve ever seen, barely swings the bat and of course misses hitting the ball. Jamie and Busy exchange a look, and kinda roll their eyes like “WOMEN, AMIRITE?”

Later on, Busy and Amanda are in the locker room, discussing Mona’s upcoming party. Amanda’s excited because she thinks it’ll be a make-out party and that she’ll get to participate in her very first orgy. Anyway, Amanda’s got her eye set on “Alex from Eight B” who she hopes she’ll get lucky with at Mona’s party. Amanda starts going on about some aroma therapy thing her and her mom went to, as Phyllis is now entering her hippy New Age phase. Amanda dabs some camomile on her temples while Busy decides to not shower and allow her natural sweat to be her eau de toilette.

Ok I somehow I paused at this moment and I will use it as a reference to this scene because it makes me laugh really hard. Amanda looks like she’s doing some really offensive cultural reference, but she’s really just dabbing essential oils on her head.

Later on, Busy and Jamie are playing catch  and wearing the EXACT same outfit. They are discussing Mona’s party, and Busy asks Jamie if he plans on going. Jamie says he is, and that he wants to invite someone. Busy starts getting her hopes up, as Jamie walks over and says “Busy…will you…..give me Amanda’s phone number?” As the look of disappoint spreads across the poor girl’s face. Maybe if you didn’t stink he might’ve asked you Busy.

New scene in science class, and as I’ve already harped upon numerous times, but will AGAIN, the show’s theme is corresponding with a real world event, i.e. the class is about magnets and how opposites attract and likes repel. WE GET IT, does this need to be bashed into our skulls from each different direction? 90’s shows clearly must’ve thought kids were too stupid to figure out themes and had to hammer it into their heads from 10,000 different angles.

While the teacher is yammering on, Busy asks Amanda if anyone aka Jamie called her last night because she tried calling her but the line was busy. Note how this scenario would never happen in today’s modern times, the 90’s are so antiquated. Amanda then says someone did call her but they hung up when she answered and that it’s bizarre as fuck that Busy called at the same moment. Busy is somewhat relieved to learn this info. The girls then continue learning how magnets work, it’s pretty complicated.

How DO they work? The questions of our time.

ANYWAY. So later on Jamie meets up with Busy and tells her he was too much of a pussy to talk to Amanda. Busy, clearly not taking note of the science lesson, asks Jamie why he likes Amanda because they have nothing in common. Jamie says it’s because she’s funny, pretty and she smells good. Once again, Busy, take a SHOWER and maybe you’ll stand a chance with this dude. Maybe Jamie only thinks Amanda smells good because in comparison to Busy’s BO she probably does smell amazing. I have a hard time believing anyone would think camomile is a sexy smell.

In the hallway, Busy goes for it and asks Jamie if he wants to go to the party with her as friends. Jamie, being the clueless male that he is, gets excited because he figures since Amanda is Busy’s best friend they could all walk over together. Busy glumly agrees. Poor friendzoned Busy.

Later on in the girl’s washroom, Amanda’s discussing some slutty dress she wants to buy, when Busy tells her she shouldn’t come all the way to her house and to just go straight to Mona’s place for the party since Amanda lives closer to Mona anyway. Amanda says she doesn’t mind waiting, to which Busy again tries to make up some excuses and then casually lets out that Jamie will be picking her up. Amanda quickly catches on that Busy wants that D to which Busy gets really defensive. I don’t get why Busy always acts so weird whenever Amanda tries to get her to admit she likes a guy. I guess because of this weird triangle going on right now, but even in other situations Busy is strange about it. Anyway, they get sort of pissed with each other, but at least Amanda won’t be cramping Busy’s game….or so she thinks.

In a new scene Busy’s taking a bubble bath (finally), when Lucy knocks and asks if she can grab her glasses. As she’s leaving, Busy asks her mom to tell her the story again how her and her dad met. Turns out when Sam was fresh off the boat, he couldn’t find any work, so Lucy’s family hired him to fix things around the house. Lucy fell in love with the way Sam could handle a wrench and Sam also was smitten with Lucy. Whoa Busy’s parents must’ve gotten married pretty young, sounds like they met when they were teens. Anyway, somehow Busy relates to this story, even though her situation with Jamie seems not at all similar to Sam and Lucy’s courtship. Lucy tells Busy to then have a good time at her pretty. Busy grins and then submerges herself into the bathtub. This part always annoyed me because you can clearly see that Busy is wearing a white bikini when the bubbles move (not that I wanted to see a naked Lani Billard, she just should’ve laid still!)

Busy gets ready, and you know she’s trying to look hot, because she’s wearing the boob enhancing shirt from the French guys episode (Edit: I went back to look, and it’s actually not the same shirt, but it looks pretty darn similar). She even bought some of that camomile essential oil stuff to try and appeal to Jamie’s senses.

The doorbell rings and Busy’s excited to see Jamie’s fine ass. But her excitement lasts for about two seconds, as Amanda appears right behind him. Turns out Jamie walked a mile to pick up Amanda and then back to get Busy. If he had the guts to go all the way over to Amanda’s house unannounced, why didn’t he just suggest they walk over to Mona’s party together alone? I guess that would be too big an asshole move, but anyway, Busy is pretty disappointed. To add insult to injury Jamie exclaims that something “smells like mosquito repellent”.

Walking to the party, the gang makes small talk, and we learn Busy and Jamie share more similarities with History being their favourite subjects. We get it show, they’re too darn alike to ever have a romantic connection.

They finally get to Mona’s and I notice that Daisy is not present. She’s probably at home carrying Danny’s love child. Amanda quickly rushes into the party, while Jamie keeps forcing Busy to be his wing woman by asking her to find out if Amanda likes him. Busy’s just thrilled with this whole fucking scenario.

Busy meets up with Amanda in the kitchen and Alex from Eight B is totally checking Amanda out. This pleases both girls, and Busy plays up her wing woman role to Amanda’s benefit and pushes her towards Alex from Eight B to get that going. Jamie comes over and asks Busy if she’s asked Amanda yet and Busy says nope. Jamie then reluctantly asks Busy if she wants to dance which she happily says yes to.

Everyone dances around in the whitest way possible, when the song ends and Busy decides to request “Shattered Heart”, her and Jamie’s favourite jam. Since it’s a slower song, Jamie tries to use it as a chance to ask Amanda to dance, even though she’s already slow dancing with Alex from Eight B. Busy decides to be blunt and tells Jamie it’s pretty damn obvious Amanda doesn’t care about him at all since she’s barely acknowledged him since they got to the party. Jamie’s “shattered heart” can’t handle the rejection and he decides to leave.

Busy ends up leaving with Jamie, and walks home with him. She vaguely implies that somewhere out there a girl probably likes him, and he just doesn’t know it yet. Of course he still has no idea it’s Busy, as it’s clear he totally doesn’t realize she is a girl. As they walk up to her door, Jamie tries to do their handshake, but Busy goes for it and kisses him. Jamie backs away in shock and horror saying “Busy! We’re friends…JUST…friends.” Stone. Cold.

Busy goes inside and Lucy comes out of her bedroom and asks her how the party went. You can tell Busy is really struggling not to cry in this scene, or at least that’s how it looks to me. She tells her mom she’ll be up in a minute, and then goes to sit alone in the dark living room. I feel really bad for Busy, like what guy would immediately reject a girl after being rejected themselves? Busy isn’t hideous… but I guess if it’s not there you can’t force it. DAMN MAGNETS.

Next day at school Amanda’s excitedly reminiscing about the party, while it’s clear Busy still feels like major shit. Amanda then goes to display the finest trophy of her life thus far; her very first hickey. Busy of course doesn’t care, and turns to leave when she and Jamie spot each other. They both look at each other awkwardly and turn in the opposite direction, as it suddenly dawns on Amanda that Busy did have a crush on Jamie.

Busy’s sitting on some bleachers like a Sad Panda, when Amanda comes over and says she knows Busy liked Jamie. Amanda asks why Busy didn’t tell her and Busy replies because she knew he liked someone else. Amanda asks who and Busy says it doesn’t matter. Wise decision there Busy, that would’ve been so awkward, and knowing Amanda, once she realizes a guy likes her she zeros in for the kill. Busy goes on to say it’s bullshit because she and Jamie have so much in common, while Amanda points out that love is illogical and dependent on chemistry, which is pretty much true.

Just as the girls are about to leave the bench, Jamie shows up. Amanda takes off and Jamie asks Busy if she wants to play catch after school, obviously trying to completely avoid talking about what happened and hoping they can just go back to being buddies. Busy says nope, but as he’s turning to leave, she says “maybe next week.” Judging by the fact that Jamie is never seen again, I’m going to assume Busy held onto her grudge forever.

Jamie walks off as “Shattered Heart” is played once again over the credits.

I liked this episode a lot. It’s rare to see Busy really fall for a guy like she did with Jamie. It kind of sucks that he shot her down in such a cold manner though, but I think he was more shocked than disgusted since it’s clear Jamie never saw Busy as anything other than a dude.

Next episode: Amanda turns thirteen and she thinks that gives her the right to be a rebellious little shit.

Season 3, Episode 9: Swear to God

Hola Ready or Not party people. Apologies for not writing a review lately. I have no excuse other than needing a break from this damn show. Well now I feel more energized, which is good, because this episode is probably the lamest of Season 3 and I will need all willpower I can muster to write this review.

The episode opens with some random teacher doing roll call, showing off how diverse this school is with names like Ricki Rodriguez and Wendy Wong being called out. After the teacher calls out Amanda’s name, he notes that it’s weird she’s in school, because she’s a Jew and it’s Yom Kippur. Amanda lets him know she’s not a Jew in terms of actually practicing the religion, just a Jew culturally or something. The teacher then asks her to explain to the class what Yom Kippur is, even though she told him literally one second ago she is not a religious Jew and thus wouldn’t know any of the holiday meanings. Stupid teacher, no wonder you’re never shown again…learn some listening comprehension.

Anyway, Amanda stands up and tries to stammer out some bullshit, before accepting defeat and sitting her ass down.

The teacher opens up the floor for the other multi-cultural students to educate Amanda on her own religion, to which Wendy Wong does. This leads the teacher to begin a discussion about “comparing” religions (not sure if that’s the best choice of words when talking about this subject matter). He asks Busy about Catholic stuff, which Busy is a pro at because you know Sam drags the Ramone’s asses to church every Sunday. Amanda’s impressed that Busy knows all these Catholic holidays, but they’re really not that hard to remember. I grew up Catholic, and I don’t consider myself very religious now and I still remember all those holidays Busy pointed out. Amanda tells Busy she’s embarrassed about not knowing about Jew stuff. The teacher tells them to shut up, even though he started this whole religious conversation. Thank God this teacher is never seen again, bring back Mr. Boil please and thanks.

The next scene Amanda drags Busy to a church to bask in Catholic glory. It is a pretty nice church…the show probably scouted out the best looking one in Toronto for this scene. Amanda finds praying fascinating, thinking it is like “passwords to God.” I guess that’s an interesting way of looking at it. Amanda notices a woman doing confession, and wants to try it out. Busy says she can’t, because Amanda would be engulfed by the wrath of God if she went into the confession booth since she hasn’t had her first communion. Amanda tells Busy she’s lucky to get to go to Church every Sunday and Busy tells her it’s supremely boring and Amanda can go in her place if she wants.

Amanda arrives home, and who should be there but her extremely Jewish grandmother or “Bubbie” as she likes to be called. Once again, the show conveniently having an event i.e. Amanda questioning her religious beliefs coincide with someone/something appearing on the show that compliments this event aka Bubbie’s one and only appearance ever on this show.

Bubbie made a big ol’ spread, but Phyllis tells her that she and Amanda aren’t practicing Jews, and so breaking fast means nothing to them. You could still eat the damn food, Phyllis. Bubbie’s disappointed at raising a heathen child, which stressed Amanda out and asks Bubbie if it’s bad she didn’t fast. Bubbie tells her it’s not her fault her mom is an infidel, and that God doesn’t expect kids to fast. Bubbie then points out that if Amanda was a real Jew she’d be having a Bat Mitzvah around now. Amanda decides she’s going to give it a good ol’ college try, and attempt to be a Jew.

Next scene shows Busy building a “studio” for her drums. This will never been seen or spoken about again. She asks Amanda to come by and help this weekend, but Amanda’s going to synagogue on Saturday with Bubbie, and Busy can’t do it on Sunday because of her church duties. Damn religion, always ruining people’s lives.

Amanda and Bubbie are then seen doing what I can assume is the “Shabbat Blessings” as I looked up “Jewish Friday night rituals” and that’s what came up.

The next day at synagogue Amanda makes eyes with a cute Jewish boy. If there’s anything that motivates Amanda, it’s a penis. With that, she has now decided to become a full-fledged Jew, and tells an overjoyed Bubbie she wants a Bat Mitzvah.

The next day, in a short scene, Amanda’s discussing her decision about becoming Jewish with Busy. Busy thinks it’s pretty lame and advises Amanda to make sure she doesn’t become a fanatic. Wise words in this day and age.

Later on in the day Phyllis, Leonard and Amanda are meeting with a Rabbi to discuss all the things Amanda needs to do before her Bat Mitzvah. Leonard tries to throw Phyllis under the bus by saying he always wanted to go to synagogue, but Phyllis reminds Leonard he is a lazy jackass who would never be able to follow all the rules of being Jewish. The Rabbi tells them to shut the fuck up, and tells Amanda she needs to decide what it means to be Jewish to her. Amanda then suggests Brent Green (cute Jew boy) as her tutor to learn Yiddish or whatever the language is that she has to learn. The Rabbi smirks and you can totally tell he knows she’s only using his people’s religion to get laid and says “I’ll see what I can do.”

Wisely, the Rabbi chooses the person with the least amount of sex appeal to tutor Amanda; Monkey Ears. Amanda gets all pissed off that converting to a religion isn’t getting her access to hot dudes anymore, and you can tell she’s already checked out of this Jewish thing by the sheer annoyance on her face of one day’s worth of practicing the language.

As they’re leaving the synagogue, Amanda’s discouraged that learning a language is hard and has already basically thrown in the towel. Suddenly as they turn the corner, she see’s that the synagogue has been defaced by eggs and a huge swastika. Amanda’s in shock, while the other Jewish kids sadly don’t seem that surprised. What the hell? I’ve never heard of anything like this happening in Toronto…. this is like Nazi Germany garbage.

Suddenly, Amanda is hit in the back with an egg by the invisible man, who runs off saying “dirty Jews, stop stinking up our city!” Again…if this has happened to anyone in Toronto please let me know. Toronto has a huge Jewish population, so I’d be rather surprised, but I guess anything is possible.

So now Amanda’s definitely not becoming a Jew, as this event has fully traumatized her.

Later on, Amanda’s with Busy cleaning her egg-stained coat, and telling Busy she’s done with being Jewish because it’s “too dangerous”. She really must not know the history of her people and all the stuff they’ve gone through. I honestly think Amanda just expected becoming a Jew to be a walk in the park.

Later on that night, Bubbie comes in to say good night to Amanda as she’s heading back to Florida tomorrow. Bubbie gives Amanda some really nice candle holders as her Bat Mitzvah gift. Amanda tells Bubbie she can’t go through with it because “it’s too hard” (Amanda’s catch phrase, as she gives up on everything that takes some sort of effort on this show) and she’s worried people might hate her for being Jewish. Bubbie doesn’t try to hide the fact that people might be assholes because she is Jewish, and tells Amanda her half-assed attempt at moving up the ranks pleased her enough, and she can keep the candle holders.

The episode ends with Amanda performing the Shabbat with Phyllis. I’m assuming Amanda’s going to be a part-time Jew like I am with Catholicism, aka only going to synagogue on whatever the Jewish equivalent of Christmas Eve is.

This episode was pretty meh for me. I think Amanda was extremely naive about becoming Jewish. Was she never informed that Jews have gone through a lot of shit in the past and thus can sometimes have incidents happen in the present? I know her parents aren’t practicing, but the fact that Amanda seemed so absolutely clueless about Judaism really surprised me. You’d think she would have had some idea about the trials and tribulations of being a Jew.

Ah well. Anyway, next episode: Busy likes a boy who likes Amanda. DRAMA.

Season 3, Episode 8: Thin Ice

Yeeeeeeah. So I’m going to stop giving myself deadlines, because it clearly doesn’t work for me. Plus I figure the two people who I know for sure read this won’t care if it’s not right on schedule. I must allow my creative juices to flow naturally,  but really….this show can start getting on my nerves after awhile.

Anyway, I don’t remember much from this episode because I always found it kind of dull, and Amanda continues with her season long shitty behaviour. So let us begin.

The episode opens with the grade eights rehearsing for a production of the play Hamlet. The talent in the school must be tapped dry, because it looks like Monkey Ears is actually playing the lead role. Amanda’s backstage pacing around nervously because there’s some casting lady in the audience of their dress rehearsal looking for talent. No idea why she’s at this school, but whatevs. This is also the start to Amanda’s annoying love of acting, which we won’t stop hearing about for the rest of duration of this show.

Amanda’s cue comes up and she starts hamming it up on stage. I’m pretty sure she’s playing the role of Ophelia. Suddenly the cardboard wall behind them starts to fall, threatening (not really) to flatten Monkey Ears and Amanda. But luckily Busy saves the day, and catches it in the nick of time. This act really impresses the casting lady who gives Busy a hearty applause, resulting in Busy showing off her muscle definition. That girl off to the side of Busy looks severely unimpressed.

After rehearsal, Amanda and Busy are called over to meet the casting lady. Amanda’s having heart palpitations, while Busy couldn’t care less. We find out the casting lady’s name is Ms. Kurahashi (probably spelt wrong). Her name seriously sounds like a Japanese car company.  Amanda asks Ms. Kurahashi what she’s looking for, and she says general talent and casting for commercials. Amanda continues on and asks what commercial specifically, and Ms. K (not gonna spell her name out ever again), says the latest thing is for some granola bar called “Solo” and it will star Canadian figure skating sensation Kurt Browning. Amanda and Busy are both awe struck hearing this.

At Busy’s place, the girls are both going on about how Kurt Browning is both their hero’s. Busy likes him because he’s a good athlete, while Amanda thinks he’s cute. I’ve never heard of anyone having a crush on Kurt Browning. I feel like he forced the show to say that Amanda finds him hot. Busy apparently has a vast Kurt Browning VHS collection, and they start watching one of his ice shows. Busy wishes aloud to be as talented as Kurt in “anything she does” while Amanda just wants to see him naked and to use the commercial to launch her one-second-old acting career. BTW, off topic, but I always though Kurt Browning won an Olympic gold medal, but he never did. The highest he placed was 5th. I remember hearing a lot about him growing up, so I was kind of surprised to hear that, because he was a big deal here. Then again, Canada goes on about any athlete that does mildly well, so I’m not surprised when it came to figuring skating that he and Elvis Stojko were the bee’s knees in the 90’s.

Later on, Busy is washing dishes when Amanda calls to bitch about the casting lady not calling her yet. As if right on cue, Busy’s “call waiting” goes through (such a throwback to the 90’s) and lo and behold, it’s the casting lady calling for her. Busy returns back to the line with Amanda and tells her the casting lady wants her to audition for the commercial. Amanda’s in shock and you can tell she is pissed off, because Busy didn’t do any acting whatsoever. They have an awkward, tense silence, and then Amanda says she has to go just in case the casting lady calls her. Busy’s pretty excited about getting the call, while Amanda tensely watches her phone for the rest of the night.

The next day at the audition, Amanda comes along with Busy for her own selfish reasons. Ms. K comes out and all Amanda has to say is, “try and put in a good word for me!” She didn’t want you, Amanda. Quit being so desperate.

Busy goes in and Kurt Browning is there with the director for the commercial. Busy has a total star-struck moment, and freezes in front of Kurt. He asks her name, and she replies with Busy, which Kurt seems to find endearing. The director asks Busy questions such as “have you ever played hockey?” and “what position?” to which Busy replies “goalie.” So it’s clear this is going to be a sport’s based commercial, hence the reason why they didn’t want Amanda’s prissy ass.

The next day at school, Busy tells Amanda that she got a callback to come back for another audition. You can tell that Amanda is plenty jealous at learning this information. Turn’s out that they are looking for a goalie, and that Busy will get a chance to be on the ice with Kurt. Amanda points out that Busy sucks at skating, which Busy acknowledges, but figures since they need a goalie, she probably won’t do any skating. She asks Amanda to help her practice, but Amanda’s ego has been severely bruised at being rejected for the commercial, and she tells Busy she’s too busy with rehearsal for the play. Once again, Amanda’s being a little snotty bitch. What is it with her and season three?

In the eve, Busy’s parents are prematurely celebrating Busy getting the commercial. Busy tells them to calm the fuck down, because she hasn’t gotten it yet, but Sam is already telling all the customers that his daughter’s going to be in a commercial with the “champion of the world.” Way to put the pressure on her, Sam. We then get a Ready or Not dream sequence, it’s been a while since one of those!

Kurt is skating around “Busy” (because it’s clearly an actual skater whose in a goalie mask), and then lifts her up and does some elaborate skating moves with her. She then takes off her mask and Kurt shows her the “Solo” bar in a corny manner, and then kisses Busy on the cheek while she looks at him lustfully.

Busy is shaken out of her daydream by Sam yelling at her to focus on being a goalie. Frankie, Lucy and Sam are all practicing shooting on her in net, though it is important to note that it’s street hockey she’s playing and not ice hockey (it will matter later on).

Next day at school, backstage, Busy is practicing goalie blocks with some random extras. I think the Asian girl is the “OoOoOoh tough luck” girl from last episode. Good for her for getting more lines. Monkey Ears comes up and asks Busy if she can get Kurt to autograph some picture of him looking like a total chode. The kid’s continue talking and gushing about Busy getting to hang out with Kurt, much to Amanda’s immense jealously. Since she can’t stand not being the centre of attention,  Amanda yells; “DO YOU MIND? SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO REHEARSE!” while stomping off like a total diva. Everyone wonders to themselves how Amanda got sand in her vagina, since there’s no explanation for her behaviour. But Busy knows better.

Busy finally confronts Amanda on her extremely immature behaviour, telling Amanda she’s sorry she got picked for the commercial, and that she didn’t try to get chosen. Amanda counters with asking why Busy ran on stage and “stole the show” by stopping the castle from falling down. Busy tells her she’s a complete dumbass, and only did that to prevent Amanda’s inflated head from being smashed by cardboard. Amanda whines that she’s the one that wants to be the actress, and Busy tells her that the commercial is more about being a good athlete than acting. Amanda’s still not having it and being pouty, and Busy asks her why she needs to be such a self-centered bitch all the time and make everything about her. Amanda tells her “good luck” in a really sarcastic manner and stomps off again. This reminds me a lot of the “Wild Life” episode, where Amanda acts like a complete little brat for not achieving something on the same level as Busy. It must be exhausting being friends with Amanda.

The next day is the audition, and Busy is there with her parents. There seems to be a lot more people auditioning than Busy expected, as there is worry in her eyes.

The first portion of the audition is goal tending. Busy does pretty well here, and advances further.

Amanda decides to finally stop being a shithead and to actually support her friend, by coming to watch the audition.

The next portion is skating, and Busy also does really well here. She’s getting closer and closer to getting the commercial. The final portion of the audition is coming up, and it’s with Kurt. He comes out and remembers Busy’s name, which makes her all giddy. How could you forget a weird as fuck name as Busy though?

The next part of the audition involves Kurt doing some crazy skating moves and then shooting the “Solo” bar at the net, which the goalie catches. The goalie then skates around Kurt and they kinda wink at each other and comment on how awesome “Solo” is. The first girl auditioning does this really well. Next up is Busy. The world kind of slow-mo’s it down, while Kurt does his skating portion. Busy manages to catch the granola bar, but unfortunately crashes into Kurt while circling around him, and tumbles like a game of Jenga. Everyone gasps at this tragedy. But it’s not that surprising, as Busy didn’t practice at all for the skating part. Also this screen shot makes me laugh.

Busy walks off the ice and she’s so pissed at herself she nearly knocks over a grown man, while stomping to the change room. She catches glimpse of Amanda and is like “what the fuck are you doing here?” and Amanda says she wanted to see her audition, to which Busy replies “satisfied, you wench?” You know a small part of Amanda is satisfied.

The next day at school, Busy appears to be still crying about the audition, as she’s in the washroom wiping her eyes. Time to move on, Busy. Amanda comes in and apologizes for being a jealous cow. Busy says she has to go into hiding because she didn’t get the commercial, stating she’ll have to “switch schools and possibly families.” Busy, Busy… you need to learn that people really don’t care about events outside their own lives, and I guarantee you not one of your peers gives a single fuck about the commercial anymore. Busy runs into a washroom stall stating she’s never skating again, and Amanda calls her a dumbass, saying she didn’t quit the play when she didn’t get a call from Ms. K. It’s really not a good comparison though, as Amanda wasn’t publicly humiliated like Busy was. Then Amanda starts saying some corny PSA stuff like “you don’t get good unless you try” and then tries the ol’ reverse psychology with the lines “if you want to be a quitter, go right ahead.” Yeah that wouldn’t work for me. I would just quit. Fuck skating.

I guess Amanda’s little “pep talk” worked, because the next scene is Amanda and Busy somehow gaining access to the rink that Kurt is practicing on. We see Kurt skating around, but then he falls on his ass. I guess to prove that yes, even World Champions can stumble sometimes.

But listening to the wise words of the dearly departed Aaliyah, Kurt dusts himself off and tries again, this time nailing his complicated routine.

Kurt finally notices the girl’s watching him and I’m sure his immediate thoughts were “where’s security?” But he goes up to them and says hi, remembering Busy from the audition. Amanda then has the balls to ask if they can skate with Kurt for a bit, and he figures why the fuck not. The episode ends with them gliding around the ice with Kurt.

I actually enjoyed this episode a lot more upon re-watching it. I guess because I really liked that “Wild Life” episode from season 1, and this one reminded me a lot of it. I like when Busy and Amanda get competitive with each other, though in this one, it was mostly Amanda being a little baby. I felt bad for Busy, but since 90% of life is about not getting what you want, I feel this was a valuable life lesson for her.

Next episode: Amanda attempts to be a Jew.

 

Season 3, Episode 7: Crater Face

Hi guys. I know, I know, I failed you already. It’s past Monday and I didn’t have the review up. I have no excuse other than I’ve been feeling kind of bummed lately, but I apologize. Gonna try to keep a schedule, dammit!

Alright alright, let’s begin. The episode opens with what looks like a sleep over at Amanda’s place. I see she’s wearing the same pj’s that she pissed in during the camp episodes. It looks like Daisy and Mona are also there. I love how these two randoms who were never once in this show are now bosom buddies with Amanda and Busy. So they’re taking some Cosmo quiz about the ideal man, and I guess now that Frankie has rejected her, Amanda has gone back to pining over Danny, stating her quality man is “sensitive with a great sense of humour.” WRONG. How easy it is to forget how not funny Danny was. Amanda has some video tape Danny sent her of actually performing in a club. Amanda uses this to once again, try to show off to Mona and Daisy how awesome her current beau is. I’m really surprised no one is shading Amanda, considering it’s been merely two weeks since her whole Frankie fiasco. Like if this was nowadays, people would be calling her a slut and cyber bullying her online. She’s lucky she grew up in the 90’s. So yeah, Amanda’s really proud that Danny is actually going somewhere with his lame comedy and suggests to Daisy that she could probably get him to perform it at her pool party. Daisy is really excited, because she’s never met Danny and has no idea how unfunny he is in person.

A new scene with Busy and Amanda, and I guess this will sort of set up this episode’s theme of body insecurities. Amanda’s once again gone back to bitching about her body, stating how “huge” her thighs are. Busy is like “shut your pie hole”, while Amanda is worried Danny’s going to reject her because she’s a fat fuck now. I think this episode really begins Amanda’s descent into becoming superficial, which lasts for the rest of the duration of this show. But yes, Amanda’s bitching about being a beached whale when she probably weighs 100lbs. at most. God this shit annoys me. Danny should reject her not because she’s a fat ass, but because she’s a dumb ass.

The next day at school, a new guy comes up to Amanda and begins flirting with her. This actor was on this lame Canadian show called Radio Active which I of course watched. I watched every Canadian show in the mid to late 90’s and I am unashamed. Anyway, he compliments her outfit and we find out his name is Doug, but he prefers to go by Jake. K…. Amanda’s all pleased with their interaction, since she thrives off male attention. Doug/Jake walks off, then Busy comes up to her and asks where the hell Danny is. Amanda doesn’t know, and points out that Danny didn’t see her last night, despite living downstairs. He claimed to have jet lag from that whole one hour flight between Toronto and New York. Amanda’s worried that now that Danny’s performing in da club, that he has “tons of gorgeous groupies” and thus will give in to temptation. But no…that is not the reason, and we learn that as Danny comes up behind Amanda and we get a look at his now pimply faced mug, hence the title of the episode.

Sorry, you can’t really see his face well in this screenshot, but rest assured he’s covered in zits. Also, I think it’s interesting to point out that Amanda immediately thought that Danny would dump her for hot chicks, when she was the one on the brink of probably dumping him for Frankie. Like there’s no way in hell she would’ve went back to Danny had Frankie not resisted her psycho urges.

In a short scene after, Amanda and Danny awkwardly have lunch together, while it becomes clear that Amanda has nothing to talk to Danny about now that he is hideously grotesque.

Moving on, in gym the girl’s are discussing Danny’s pimple problem. Mona say’s he should lock himself away like Quasimodo, while Daisy is a lot more sympathetic. Mona brings up the gross thought of kissing him, which Amanda makes a face at. That can’t be a good sign when he’s your damn boyfriend.

Later on, Amanda’s checking out Doug/Jake, and Danny comes running out of the school and squirts her with a water gun. See, this is the type of shit that Danny does that I find a lot more unappealing than his stupid pimples. He decides to squirt his gun at Jake/Doug which of course pisses him off, while Amanda stands there feeling super awkward. She then gets pissed because he’s not wearing socks with his shoes which could result in warts or more things that could make Danny even uglier.

Later on, Amanda’s bitching on the phone to Busy about how immature Danny is for bringing her back a squirt gun from New York, even though she apparently used to collect them. She tries to come up with some bullshit reasoning for not inviting Danny to Daisy’s pool party, by saying that he’s probably too tired to socialize. So it’s pretty clear Amanda does not want to be associated with Danny now that he’s deformed in her eyes.

Next day at the pool party Amanda chats it up with Doug/Jake and we learn the origin of his two names. It’s not that interesting…basically he doesn’t want to be called Doug because it is “too clunky” whatever the fuck that means. But I have to agree, Doug is a terrible name. Random side note: for the longest time I thought this guy was wearing a life guard whistle, which I thought was stupid…like does this fuck think he’s on Baywatch or something? But I think it’s a cross, though I cannot be sure.

Doug/Jake runs off to get Amanda a drink. Much to Amanda’s chagrin, Danny decides to show his hideous face at the same social event she’s at. Danny points out that Amanda didn’t tell him about the party, but Daisy ended up inviting him. Amanda sounds totally disappointed when she hears that. She suggests they go for a swim, but Danny declines, which leads me to believe he probably has bacne as well, which is very unfortunate. Jake/Doug comes back and points out that Danny was the dumbass who squirted him with the squirt gun. Monkey Ears puts some weird white shit in his mouth and spits it out, claiming he’s a “Danny Masters zit.” Everyone starts laughing their asses off.

While everyone’s laughing, Danny walks away to sad music. Monkey Ears asks Amanda if she’s going to go after her boyfriend to which she replies “he’s not my boyfriend!” much to a pained look on Danny’s face. I need to point out that this Asian chick says “OooOoOOh, tough luck” during this part, and my friends and I would imitate that line for many years to come.

Later on, Busy and Amanda are in some strip mall and it looks like Amanda’s going to buy something to help Danny with his pimples since “some people can’t get past his complexion.” Probably going in to buy him a bag to put over his head, since it is clear Danny should never be seen in public again.

But no, it’s just some Clearasil, which Amanda gives anonymously via a brown paper bag outside Danny’s apartment door. I’m sure Danny isn’t smart enough to figure out who was the person who left it there.

A few moments later, Danny stops by to confront Amanda about the pimple cream. Amanda plays dumb and says it was free samples, to which Danny replies that free samples don’t have the receipt still inside. Danny then goes on to school her, saying drug store acne cream isn’t going to clear his extreme acne. Amanda’s actually an idiot, and figures he hasn’t even tried, to which Danny says, “I’m on medication for it you dumbfuck.” It’s honestly the equivalent of someone trying to tell a depressed person to “snap out of it and look on the bright side” i.e. pretty insensitive and really stupid on Amanda’s part.

Danny finally catches on that Amanda has become totally vapid, and tells her she should run off and be with Doug/Jake because they’re both superficial and obsessed with appearances. He kicks her to the curb and walks off. Damn Amanda’s personality is terrible, she loses men left, right and centre.

Next day at school Amanda’s bitching to Busy yet again about Danny, except this time she’s saying how mean he was to her. A little self-reflection on her part would go a long way. But even Busy, who hated Danny at first, seems to see his point of view a lot more than Amanda’s. Daisy and Mona come in discussing how Monkey Ears pulled a totally dickish move against Danny at the pool party.  Danny suddenly comes in wearing these novelty sized ears with a banana and starts acting like a monkey.  This embarasses Monkey, but really, I think Danny looks idiotic in this get up. But whatever, I guess he kind of got his revenge, since everyone laughs at Monkey Ears’ ridicule.

At lunch, Amanda’s eating with Doug/Jake, and he’s going on and on about wanting to become a male model. I guess after realizing that really good looking people are boring and self-centered, Amanda stares longingly at Danny, who at least had some personality (even if it was an annoying one). Danny’s playing basketball with Daisy, and you can tell Amanda is one of those women who only wants a man once she realizes other women like him, since there’s this look of sadness in her eyes staring at Danny having fun with another girl. Anyway, she deserves it, Amanda’s been an asshole this episode.

A short scene of Amanda walking through a park with the water gun Danny gave her, shows her looking really regretful at the way things ended up with him. I really think she’s looking at their past relationship with rose-coloured glasses. As I’ve said in the past, these two never had great chemistry. Maybe she’s bummed that she’s not going to have a guy to obsess over now (though we all know that won’t last).

Back at the apartment, Danny comes back and Amanda runs up to him as she’s been waiting in the lobby for God knows how long. She confesses that the reason she was treating Danny like shit was because she was obsessed with her thighs and she thought he would think she was obese. Danny kind of gives her a “bitch please” look, while Amanda begs him for forgiveness. But Danny reveals that he is moving to New York for good, as his mom finally got full custody of him. As they ride up the elevator together, Amanda tries one last desperate attempt to get back with Danny, asking if he wants to hang out on Friday, but he already has plans with Daisy. BURN. You lose every dude to some other chick, don’t you Zimm?

As Danny is leaving the elevator, Amanda decides enough is enough, pulls out a gun, and kills Danny.

Not really, she squirts him with the squirt gun and they chuckle softly to each other. The episode ends with Amanda almost getting crushed by the elevator, but unfortunately not.

Well that’s the end of Danny as a character. I always found it weird that he was Amanda’s boyfriend for so long (I think they dated longer than Busy and Troy) and yet was barely in any episodes together with her. I don’t know, they’re relationship was so lackluster to me, that’s why I supported the short lived Frankie and Amanda union. Oh well, hopefully Danny got laid with Daisy.

Next episode: A famous Canadian figure skater causes a riff between Amanda and Busy.

 

 

Season 3, Episode 6: Three’s A Crowd

Hello peeps. You may notice that there is now a shiny new “Donate” button to the right of my reviews. I’m going to be honest with you guys, like I said before, I’m really hoping to one day make some monetary gains from this website/my writing in general, and right now I’m having a lot of trouble actually getting a “real job.” So I guess that donate button is my way of saying I ain’t too proud to beg. But yeah, if you happen to want to donate some money, that would be awesome, but if you don’t, that’s also totally fine. I figured may as well try, because what do I have to lose beyond my dignity? But seriously, this will be the only time I mention it in a post…and now I’m done! So let’s move on. Edit: I just wanted to mention, if anyone does decide to donate and there is a problem, can you please let me know? I looked at my stats, and it looked like someone tried to potentially donate, but there was an error message saying “there is a problem with the email address provided by the seller”. I tested it out (donated myself a $1 haha) and it seemed to work, so hopefully it’s all good. But yes, please let me know if there is a problem, as I would like to resolve that ASAP. THANKS FRIENDS.

Alright, as mentioned before, this is my favourite Ready or Not episode. Why, you may ask? Well it’s got steamy (for a children’s show) romance, betrayal, Amanda being obsessive, which is always hilarious, and Busy is a pretty stellar friend in this one. All in all it is highly entertaining, so off we go.

The episode opens with a shot of Frankie riding his bike up to the house, while Amanda gazes down from Busy’s bedroom window at him. Girl has a serious case of penis on the brain since their little kissing session.

Apparently it is “36 more hours til school starts” and Amanda’s depressed. Busy points out that Amanda’s the biggest keener and loves school, but Amanda wants to be going to high school since Cornelius is super lame. Poor Amanda, you’ll never get to go to high school as long as your on this program (spoiler alert: they end up going to a junior high for some stupid reason instead of a high school next season).

Suddenly, Frankie’s super fruity music is heard from the hallway. Busy yells at him to turn it down, while Amanda gets excited at the prospect of having an excuse to talk to Frankie. She excuses herself to pee, and then get’s her Lip Smacker’s lip balm out and ready to pounce. After walking by Frankie’s room 250 times, she finally pokes her head in and see’s that he’s also reading (while listening to music? who does that?) and says hi. Frankie wanders over and they make small talk about the book he’s reading.

Amanda makes her move, and comments on how good Frankie’s drawing are that are hanging in his room. Frankie gets super excited about his ego getting stroked (probably because he’s basically ignored by everyone else in the household) and invites Amanda in for a “closer look.” Before he can give it to her good, Busy pulls a major cock block move and calls Amanda out for not peeing. Amanda get’s all flustered and runs to the can, while Frankie gives Busy the stink eye for ruining his game.

We cut to a new scene and it appears Busy has randomly decided to shave her legs. This is also another throw back to the first time Amanda shaved her legs. Are these chicks using rusty razors? I didn’t have that many cuts the first time I did it! Also, we can see here what I call the start of Amanda’s “school girl phase”, where she will now take a liking to wearing knee socks and short kilts. At least it’s better than her Claude Tanner look.

Anyway, there’s a valid reason for Busy’s cuts….she didn’t use soap and water! Jesus Christ that would be painful. Dry shaving…ugh..I am shuddering thinking about it.

Two random girls come up to the Busy and Amanda and they will sort of be their recurring friend’s for this season. I’m pretty sure their name’s are Daisy and Mona if my memory serves me correctly. Anyway, Daisy is hyper and annoying, and Mona is sort of…there. I guess the show wanted the girls to interact with more people. Anyway, they have small chit chat and then head to homeroom. Oh yeah, and there’s some dance that weekend that Amanda and Busy will be attending together…it’s stupid but sort of important to mention for later.

They go into the classroom and Amanda is irritated at how immature the grade 8 boys are. I guess her tastes are refined now that she’s gotten a taste of a grade 10 man.

Next scene is in Busy’s garage where she’s practicing, and once again Amanda is hanging out waiting for Frankie to get home. Dom randomly comes out with some cookies he made for his girl and takes off quickly after. Amanda notes how romantic Busy’s brothers are which makes Busy roll her eyes. Frankie gets back and Amanda quickly tries to start a conversation with him about stupid shit like his t-shirt and school. Busy starts getting really annoyed and tells them to shut the fuck up, so Frankie goes in to get some food. Amanda quickly runs in after him. BTW I need to note that Amanda is wearing way too much make-up in this whole scene.

Amanda runs in and Frankie returns back downstairs with a drawing for her. They kind of stand around, slowly building up some sexual tension, until they finally kiss again.

Busy stops her damn drumming and walks in to see her brother and best friend making out. Also, does anyone else think Amanda’s body is bent really weird here? It’s like the show didn’t want to show them actually moving their mouths? I dunno, she looks hunched back to me, and it’s odd. But anyway, Busy is majorly WTF at this whole scenario.

Amanda comes back outside pleased as punch, and Busy cuts right to the chase telling her she saw her canoodling with Frankie. Busy asks how long they’ve been fooling around, and Amanda confesses to Frankie first kissing her at the go-karts. Busy gets irritated that Amanda didn’t tell her, and Amanda uses the excuse that she wasn’t sure how Frankie felt about her. Not true, she did it because Frankie told her not to say anything, but anyway. Busy brings up a bunch of reasons why it would be stupid if they dated, such as their age difference, the fact that Amanda is still sort of dating Danny and the biggest one being that he’s her goddamn brother. Amanda reassures Busy that they’ll still hang out and do all the same stuff, but everything is super awesome because she has an older boyfriend! Busy gives her major death glare in response to that.

The next day Dom and Frankie are sharing a brotherly breakfast when Busy enters the kitchen. Dom asks her to get milk from the fridge, and Frankie asks for jam. Busy totally snubs Frankie and only gets the milk for Dom. Buuurn. She walks off and Frankie asks Dom “what’s her problem??” Are you really that dense, Frankie?

At school, Amanda is putting Frankie’s drawing up in her locker and bragging to Mona and Daisy about having an older boyfriend. They walk off and Busy comes up offering Frankie’s toenails for her collection, haha. Amanda says she’s not being fair, and Busy sort of clams up. Daisy and Mona run by again yelling at Amanda that they look forward to seeing her man candy at the dance and Busy gets all hurt/angered because she and Amanda had a date to go together. Amanda being as selfish/clueless as ever, thought it might be a swell idea to invite Frankie along and Busy blows up on her and walks away. Amanda stands there like a dumbass with her mouth open wondering why in the world Busy could be upset with her.

In a new scene, the Ramone’s have finished dinner, and it looks like Sam has finally done something domesticated and cooked for the first time. Finally, Busy can’t keep up her silence anymore and lays into Frankie that she “saw him” yesterday, while Frankie tells her to shut her hole because she sucks at shaving her legs. Just before Battle Royale breaks out the doorbell rings. Busy goes to answer it and it’s Amanda, and she’s looking for Frankie. Damn this girl has some nerve/Fatal Attraction shit going on. Busy’s over it, and embarrasses Frankie by loudly yelling “Frankie it’s for you, it’s Amanda!” Sam and Lucy both give a wtf look and Dom starts laughing his ass off.

So Amanda’s going full on crazy girlfriend and dropping by asking Frankie about some dumb class he mentioned once to her. Frankie starts to realize that Amanda’s probably going to turn into that meme Overly Attached Girlfriend and quickly cuts to the chase trying to figure out why she came over. They don’t show her saying it, but Amanda ends up asking Frankie to the school dance.

Frankie goes back to his room (after Dom calls him a cradle robber lol) and Busy bursts in telling him she’s sorry for publicly humiliating him in front of the family, but that she’s looking out for him. She tells Frankie that it would look weird that he’s dating a 12 year old when he’s in high school and it makes him look desperate. I just need to say, I was watching this episode way back when when I was around Amanda’s age (a bit older), and my boyfriend was three years older than me and I felt SO awkward haha. I remember thinking “please don’t think this, I’m not a little kid, I got game!” Frankie totally denies that she’s his girlfriend and more or less says that their kiss meant nothing to him. Busy asks if Amanda invited him to the dance, and that he said no to going to that lame ass event. So I guess Busy figures this is now all over and done with.

The next day during gym Busy comes up to Amanda and asks how she is, figuring things are shitty now that Frankie officially dumped her ass. Amanda says she’s cool, and that her and Frankie aren’t going to the dance, because he has to do inventory  at the butcher shop and they’re going to do something afterwards if he finishes in time. Busy flat out tells her that her asshole brother lied to her, because they never do inventory on the weekend. Amanda then goes on to say that Busy is jealous of  her and Frankie’s love and needs to step off. Busy’s like “you’re a dumb bitch,” all while they are doing some odd yoga position.

Later in the eve, Amanda calls the Ramone residence looking for Frankie. Busy answers the phone and tries to get Frankie to deal with Amanda’s shit, but Frankie refuses. Busy tells Amanda Frankie is out, hangs up and lays it into Frankie for being a douche and basically leading Amanda on. Frankie tries to justify his shitty actions by saying he didn’t want to hurt her feelings, which Busy replies “you think this isn’t going to hurt her feelings?”

The scene shifts to Amanda’s house and Amanda’s making cookies….obviously for Frankie. This girl is the definition of desperate. She asks her mom what it means if someone doesn’t get a telephone message and her mom says the person who took the message might have forgotten to give it. But Amanda thinks Busy didn’t give the message to Frankie on purpose. Amanda’s being a right bitch this episode, seriously. I don’t get how she can immediately think so poorly of her friendship with Busy.

The next day, Amanda decides to go full on stalker, and is now at Frankie’s school with the cookies. By some weird twist of fate, Frankie is standing in front of a window with another girl right as Amanda came along, which gives Amanda a front row view of Frankie kissing her. Amanda is crushed and walks off. Part of me thinks Frankie paid a girl to stand there all day and wait for Amanda to inevitably come by and then made the girl kiss him so Amanda would take a hint and leave him alone.

Now that Frankie has broken Amanda’s heart, she decides to run back to Busy for support. She starts crying to Busy about how she’s such an idiot (true) and she truly thought Frankie liked her. Busy told her he was borderline ghosting her big time, but Amanda didn’t want to see it. Amanda then goes on to say she would “never do that to a boy”…uhhhh you’re still technically dating Danny, so you did much worse i.e. cheating. Busy says she kind of did that to Troy, and Amanda has the gall to  say “maybe it runs in your family.” WTF Amanda. I would’ve slapped her for that remark. Frankie comes home and awkwardly says hi, while avoiding Amanda as much as possible.

The episode ends with Busy twirling Amanda around to try and cheer her up.

As I mentioned, I love this episode. I really wish they could’ve made the Frankie and Amanda romance last a bit longer though. I do think Frankie did like Amanda, but felt way too awkward about doing anything about it, especially after Busy made him feel weird about dating her. To me, it makes it pretty obvious that Frankie and Busy are very close and he does value her opinions. Plus it didn’t help that Amanda got super needy/obsessive about the whole thing. I think this episode was the one that cemented for me how much their friendship means to Busy, as it could’ve been so easy for her to blow Amanda off and be like “fuck you” considering how Amanda treated her during that whole thing.

Next episode: Danny’s back and he’s got a surprise!

 

Season 3, Episode 5: Crossing the Line

Hi everyone. Ok I made it my April resolution to update this once a week. So starting NOW, April 10th, I will be updating by Monday at midnight at the latest. I need to get back to regular updating. BTW I also want to give a shout out to superslabz for liking a bunch of entries the other day. You da real MVP.

Alright, on with this episode. I need to point out that I really enjoy this episode, it is probably in my top five favourite episodes of season 3.

So the episode opens with Busy throwing a ball against a wall while Amanda attempts to tan and get colour on her florescent skin. Busy is truly bored as fuck with the current situation, and starts spraying Amanda with a spray bottle. Amanda tells her to screw off because chilling outside in the summer kicks ass. I agree, I hate when people try to make you do stuff, always let laziness prevail.

Frankie comes out and for some reason kind of flirts with Amanda i.e. by playfully smacking her with his baseball cap on her bare stomach and acts all strangely happy to see her. Yeah there will be an explanation for this behaviour later in the episode, but it’s weird to see now, because Frankie never once seemed to give a shit about Amanda’s existence before.

Turns out Frankie is going to some sports park called Sticklebacks with his friends, and Busy begs him to let her come. Frankie says no, but as if he could stop her. I know for a fact this guy doesn’t drive, so Busy could just go anyway. Does she need Frankie to ride the bus with her for some reason? I dunno. Anyway, Busy tells him she’ll fix his bike, so Frankie gives in. Amanda snarkily asks if the reason Busy wants to go to Sticklebacks is because of the hot piece of ass working at the go-karts. How does Amanda know about this guy? Like who would know about the attractive people working at their city’s amusement parks? Once again, Amanda is so creepy in this pre-social media era. Busy gets really offended by this and says no, she wants to ride a go-kart so fuck off Amanda.

They finally get to the park after Amanda apparently spent an hour raiding Busy’s closet for clothes. Did she not wear her own clothes over to Busy’s house or did she walk over in a bikini. Really, this stupid line adds nothing to the story other then them having a reason for being late, and thus Frankie not being able to find his friends, which leads to…events. Either way, this show always has to set up the plot with weird circumstances that bring it to that point, i.e. the French guys episode and the gym situation. Alright, I’m gonna shut up and move on.

So they decide to do the go-karts first. Busy approaches the hot go-kart guy and asks him which kart is the best. He asks “if she wants to go fast” (foreshadowing) and tells her to take some kart he finished working on. This guy is a vast improvement over the French dude Busy was crushing on in terms of appearance, but that’s about it.

So even though it looked like Frankie had ditched them, he is now riding the go-karts with Amanda and Busy.  They all ride around a track, with Busy and Frankie tied for the lead. Amanda’s in dead last, and every time they show her a sad tuba tune plays, it’s pretty humourous. While this is all happening, creepy go-kart dude is checking out Busy.

Busy ends up winning and wants to continue riding, while Amanda doesn’t and Frankie wants to find his friends. Busy keeps checking out the go-kart dude and tells Amanda to hang out with Frankie, because she wants to ride more than just go-karts. So Amanda and Frankie pair off, while Busy starts another race with the go-kart guy.

So Frankie and Amanda go off to play mini-golf. Slash omg these two are so goddamn cute together, I can’t EVEN. Seriously though, I like Frankie and Amanda together, and Frankie does the cutest little smile to himself when Amanda agrees to play mini-golf with him. Sadly this screenshot does not do it justice. Goddamn Insight Productions, release this show on DVD already!

The scenes shift between Frankie/Amanda and Busy/Steve, whose name hasn’t been officially mentioned yet, but I don’t feel like writing “go-kart guy” anymore. Busy and Steve’s scenes are pretty boring, it’s literally just them riding the go-karts over and over. Amanda and Frankie have small talk, and it really has a first date feel to it. Frankie accidentally drops his sketchbook/journal out of his fanny pack (heh) which Amanda likes because it shows he’s artistic and sensitive like she is. He offers to show her his pics, and she sits beside him and they look at each other awkwardly out of the corners of their eyes and seriously…this whole scene is too cute. I miss being a teenager sometimes.

Busy and Steve finally stop go-karting and formally introduce themselves, though Busy refers to herself as “Elizabeth.” We find out Steve’s dad owns the park and that’s why he works there. He seems to be digging Busy for some reason, and wants to hang out with her, even offering to buy some food because “he gets a discount.” Wouldn’t he get the food for free if his dad is the owner? Anyway, so sparks are flying between our two couples, I wonder what’s gonna happen??

Amanda and Frankie are strolling along, discussing their poetry, when they come upon a super tacky fortune teller’s tent. Naturally Amanda wants to go in, so off they go.

The scene shifts back to “Elizabeth” and Steve, and they are getting to know each other more. Turn’s out Steve’s dad is some amusement park connoisseur, as they also have a park in Florida, and that’s where Steve goes to school. He finds out Busy is only thirteen, and he tries to pass himself off as “sixteen, turning seventeen in the fall”. PFFFFT. This actor looks around twenty seven. He tells her he’s going to enter some national go-kart race and he’s building his own kart for it. Is that a real thing? National go-karting? Probably is, just sounds really stupid. They catch a glimpse of a batting cage which Busy gets all excited about and thus turns “sixteen year old” Steve on.

They go up to the batting cage and then Steve puts his arm around Busy…more foreshadowing.

While in the tent, the fortune teller is telling Amanda that she’s extremely artistic and will do something with arts as her career, so Amanda’s pretty happy about that. Frankie asks if he’s also artistic, and she says he’s athletic, which makes Frankie cry out “No, I’m not!” ‘Tis true, we all remember that basketball episode from Season 1. But the fortune teller could give two shits about Frankie’s future, and would rather talk about the future of them as a couple. They both start feeling really awkward and she starts talking about their friendship blossoming into romance, and makes them hold hands. Suddenly her huge ass cell phone rings and it’s her kid bitching about something. The fortune teller excuses herself to go deal with it, while Amanda and Frankie sit there still holding hands.

Busy and Steve are at the batting cages, and even though Steve has to show Busy how to hold a bat, she somehow ends up beating him. Steve basically comes out and admits he’s got a thang for Busy, and asks if she wants to see the go-kart he’s building. She grins and says yes, while holding his hand also.

Back in the tent AMANDA AND FRANKIE KISS. I don’t even care that Amanda’s technically cheating on Danny, because these two are way better as a couple, and actually seem to have chemistry. As much as Amanda can get on my nerves, I 100% support this union. These two seem to make so much sense together, unlike every other person each girl ends up hooking up with.

So things seem to be blossoming quite lovely for one of the couples…let’s check on the other. Spoiler alert: It doesn’t turn out as great for Busy.

Busy enters some garage where a bunch of go-karts are. She sits in Steve’s go-kart and start acting like she’s in some race, which I guess gets Steve even more horny because he starts awkwardly rubbing her shoulder.  Steve confesses to liking Busy, and leans in for a kiss, which causes Busy to slightly freak out and try and jump out of the go-kart. He starts getting super creepy when she tries to leave, stroking her arm and saying “I thought you liked me, I thought we were having a good time.”

By now potential-rape-situation bells are going off in Busy’s head, and she’s trying her best to vacate the situation. Steve can sense she’s about to run, and goes full on sexual predator, trying to corner her and saying shit like “I saw you checking me out earlier, are you just leading me on?” Finally he goes in for another kiss and Busy pushes him to the ground. She manages to run out, while Steve holler’s “stupid tease, what did you think was going to happen!?” Christ, I’m disturbed to think how many victims he has lured to his rape cave.

Anyway, back to Frankie and Amanda. They leave the tent with huge ass grins, but Frankie asks Amanda not to tell Busy what happened. Amanda agrees, and Busy runs up all in distress about what just happened. Frankie finally see’s his friends and runs off, while Busy runs home. Amanda’s way too pleased with how her situation turned out to really notice/care that Busy is pretty upset.

Later on in the evening, Busy is in her room quietly brooding about the events that happened today. Frankie comes up and tells her Amanda’s waiting for her downstairs, and Busy tells him to say she’s sick. Frankie asks if Busy wants to talk about anything and she says no. I guess this is showcasing Frankie as a sensitive soul and that not all guys are like Steve. Anyway, we already knew Frankie was a decent guy based on other episodes.

The scene shifts to outside where Busy is borderline in tears asking Amanda if she was a tease for not giving in to Steve’s sexual attempts, because prior to that she did like him and held his hand. Amanda says some kind of lame line about how kisses should feel good, not rapey. Then she points out (as I already mentioned) that not all guys are like that, as evident by her macking with Busy’s fine ass brother. P.S. She doesn’t say that, as of now Busy does not know that Amanda and Frankie kissed.

The episode ends with Busy pointing out that she did knock Steve’s bitch ass onto the ground and Amanda nods her head in approval.

I know I said in the beginning this was in my top five, but this is honestly my second favourite episode of the series, with the next episode being my favourite. I really enjoy the Frankie and Amanda romance, and this episode in general was really good. It sucks what happened to Busy, but bastards like Steve need to know that no means no.

Alright, next Monday, Amanda and Frankie’s relationship continues, but will it survive? Tune in, to FIND OUT.

Stats Stats Stats, Which are Good, Which are Bad?

….Yeah. I got nothing. Anyway! Ever notice how cool stats are? No? Yeah, me neither. But when it comes to this website I’m pretty interested in who reads it, where they are from, what they are searching for etc. which makes these stats sort of fun for me. So I thought I’d share the stats here, maybe do it as a year end thing. Obviously I’m late on this, as I came up with this idea mid-year, but ah well. I’ll try to have a review done by this weekend or early next.

But until then, here’s some stats stats stats! These are for 2015 only.

1. In 2015 the website had 1,847 views and 721 visitors. The fact that I barely posted this website anywhere beyond Facebook/Twitter makes me happy to see these stats. I know these aren’t crazy high numbers, but I also know non-family members read this site, so again, proud. As of right now 2016 has 1,093 views and 463 visitors. I feel confident that I can SMASH (or slightly dent) 2015’s record.

2. I posted 29 times in 2015. So far in 2016 I’ve posted… 3 times. Wow, that’s a fail. Peeps need to start harassing me to get it done. Seriously though… I’ll work on this.

3. The month that had the most views was December with 285. Contrast that with March of this year which is 380. YEP I need to update more frequently. This is showing me the light.

4. The day that had the most views was April 13th 2015 at 76. This was because the website TV, eh? Tweeted about it.

5. Most popular day in general is Monday with 17% of overall views.

6. Other than the Home Page, the episode that received the most views was Season 1’s “Thirty Two Double A” with 89 views. Season 3’s “My Buddy Buddy” and Season 1’s “Origins of Man” are both tied for last with 12 views.

7. The site was referred to most by Search Engine (which makes me happy), and then Facebook coming in second and Twitter third. I think the most interesting thing I found out from looking at this is someone made a Buzzfeed article entitled “Times In Life When You Should Turn to Busy Ramone.” Wish they had actually mentioned my site. But yeah, I was pretty humoured when I first saw this.

8. The country that had the most views was my home and native land, Canada with 956. So I thank you, my fellow citizens.  The US is second with 681 and UK is third with 48 hahaha. STEP IT UP UK.

9. Here’s my favourite one, what people look up for search terms. The most common one that came in twice was “Why Does Amanda Zimm always wear purple?” Extremely fair question, as I’ve wondered that every day. The most disturbing one is “she is just thirteen but ready for fucking”…. NO. 😐 The funniest one is “when I have sophylis on my breast what do I use to treat it”. Can you even get syphilis on your breast? No, I don’t actually want to know.

So there you have it. The main stats for the website in 2015. I feel like part of the reason why I’ve slowed down with reviews is because I’m already in season 3, and there’s only two more seasons after this. I DON’T WANT IT TO END. But I do love writing reviews, and I’m so glad all you randoms out there read and hopefully enjoy them too.

 

 

 

Season 3, Episode 4: Under One Roof

Hi eurrybody. I feel like I haven’t updated this thing for awhile, but according to my stats it’s been less than a month, so yay on that. Last night I spent like two hours trying to figure out how to put ads on here, and then realized you can’t do it on a WordPress.com blog. Booourns I need the monies! Not that I expected anything but figured may as well try…it’s all about the Elizabeths baby. My goal would be to make some monetary gain from this website one day if at all possible. Maybe when I get a real job I’ll hussle on over to .org and get started on making this a real website.

Anyway, enough about me, let’s continue on with our jam packed summer episodes of Ready or Not.

The episode begins with Neon Vomit rehearsing in Busy’s garage for some musical showcase they want to be in. They now have a new girl singer, having replaced the former boring guitarist who wore his shades all the time ala Bono. The Liz is also sporting probably his most ridiculous hair style to date if you can actually believe that. I will attempt to get screenshots at some point. Anyway, NV now puts more than screams and grunts into their music as this song actually has lyrics. For a garage band it’s not terrible either.

Just as rehearsal is getting into full gear, Dom, Sam and Lucy return from somewhere with a huge “Viva Ramone” banner for their family reunion that will be the main plot of this episode.  Dom cuts off the music by unplugging their amp, (and proves their whole singing was pre-recorded as the girl’s mouth doesn’t synch up with the words…yes I notice these things!) and plugging in his own, where he begins playing “O Sole Mio”.  Sam and Lucy dance around acting dorky, but it’s nice to see them getting along. I’m glad Busy didn’t end up with a broken family. But yes, Busy is highly embarrassed by her family’s behaviour as teenagers are wont to be.

But look how cute Sam and Lucy are in this screenshot. They are way too proud of this stupid banner.

The next scene Amanda’s indulging Busy in her pipe dreams of becoming a famous musician one day. Busy’s harping on about how Sam thinks The Liz and Joanie (the girl) are weird looking. Well in terms of The Liz’s case….yeah he is fucking weird looking. Amanda’s excited about going to the reunion because she’s very open about having no life of her own, and thus needs to hang around the Ramone clan almost all the time. Busy then jet’s off to meet up with the band.

The band are at some diner discussing their song. The waitress comes to take their orders, and they all order boring shit like “a side of string beans and a Coke” while Busy orders a veal sandwich. They all kind of make a face, and the The Liz starts preaching about how bad veal/eating meat is in general. Busy makes some squirmy looking face and I guess feels bad about eating meat now. This tactic would not work on me, if anything it would make me order more meat out of spite. I hate people who pull that shit, thankfully my vegetarian friends are normal and keep their traps shut. P.S. Here’s a screenshot of The Liz’s hair. I don’t even know what to make of this.

The next scene is Busy deciding to get her nose pierced, because Joanie has one and now Busy feels like she must emulate all the cool people in Neon Vomit. I wish she had decided to get dreads like Petrocelli instead. I feel the nose piercing is a wasted scene as we don’t see it happening at all. We had to watch Amanda wax her legs, they could’ve easily added some scene of Busy almost having a freak out during the session. Anyway, moving on.

Busy arrives home right as her family is setting up dinner. Of course they immediately notice her nose ring and their reaction is pretty much what you’d expect. Sam is like “wtf take that bullshit out now” and Dom and Frankie make fun of it.

They go outside, and Sam is clearly getting more and more irritated by the second with Busy. Lucy passes her the steak which she passes to Dom as she is now a newly found vegetarian. The whole family kinda scoffs and Frankie calls her trendy, which I definitely agree with. Busy say’s meat is murder which pisses Sam off even more as meat is the reason that family isn’t living in some shanty town. Plus Sam isn’t the one actually killing the animals, he doesn’t work at the slaughterhouse, he just packs the meat up, the deed is already done so get over it Busy. Sam’s had about enough and then starts ranting about how her band is a bad influence, that they’re druggies, they dress bad etc. and Busy starts getting lippy back as a result. Sam then grounds her and Busy runs off pouting. It’s very typical teenager and parent fighting stuff.

The next day Sam and Lucy are going grocery shopping for the 700th time and Sam yells at Busy to make sure she doesn’t leave the goddamn house or he’ll cane her backside upon his return. Naturally Busy ignores this threat as the next scene is her at the audition with her band. They play their music for about ten seconds and the guy in charge decides that’s enough and they’ll do. Must not be much competition for this showcase. But of course there must be a conflict, in that the showcase had to move up a weekend and is now the same one as Busy’s family reunion. Also what is with this concert promoter’s outfit? This looks like an amateur Shakespeare actor came inside from his smoke break and decided to eat pretzels and judge some teenager’s music.

Busy manages to get home literally right before her family does. She also has removed her nose ring, I guess to begin buttering up Sam for the eventual bomb she’s about to drop. So Busy casually asks if it would matter if she didn’t go to the reunion because her band got into the showcase and it’s amazing because “they only pick twenty bands!” Yeah this isn’t Lollapalooza Busy, I bet twenty bands didn’t even audition. Of course Sam and Lucy are disgusted with her lying and general behaviour. Sam tells her to get her goddamn ass back upstairs because she’s sill grounded. Of course Busy has to get in her little statement before running off claiming “you don’t know anything about me!” Of we know Busy. The whole Ready or Not universe and the like knows that you think your mediocre musical aspirations come above any and all else. We’ve all had that friend, haven’t we? The one that believes they are so talented despite evidence to the contrary, and their talents justify their shitty behaviours and attitudes. I’m over this music shit with Busy, and we basically have to endure this until Season Five.

Dom comes up to Busy’s room and more or less asks her why she’s being a rat bastard and ruining the reunion for Sam, because it’s clear that this is something he cares about a lot. She brings up her usual “my music means a lot to me” spiel and that they are ruining her life as a result. Dom kind gives up and leaves because it’s obvious Busy isn’t to be reasoned with. I guess this is realistic in how a teen would act;  with the melodramatic “my parents are ruining my life” crap and thinking anything going on in their life is more important than anything else, despite the fact that Sam’s family is flying in from Italy for this party which makes it a lot more important in the grand scheme of things.

Busy comes downstairs and Lucy tries to get Sam and Busy talking about the reunion. Sam tells Busy that it’s very important for him that she’s at the reunion because 10 000 of their long lost relatives are coming in from Italy, and she should be there to meet them all. Lucy even suggests that Busy play a drum solo at the reunion because they do support her musical aspirations.

Of course this isn’t good enough for Busy though, and she remarks by saying “why would I want to play for a bunch of boring immigrants who stink of garlic and pinch my cheeks too hard?” I’m not a fan of Sam sometimes, but that was a pretty low blow on Busy’s end. Lucy tries her best not to backhand slap her daughter across the face, while Sam looks shattered that Busy would say such mean things about his family. He tells her to fuck off to her showcase because he doesn’t want her at the reunion anymore.

So the next day Busy is meeting up with the band and guess what? Their showcase has been cancelled because of some Ukrainian wedding. So this will set up a convenient conclusion to the episode.

We go back to the Ramone’s, and their reunion is in full swing with many Italians scampering about in the backyard and Amanda being victim to their cheek pinching.

Busy’s upstairs in her room pouting or something, I actually have no idea why she’s not at the reunion now. Amanda comes up and gives her a hot dog which Busy happily eats because who actually wants to be a vegetarian? Busy asks Amanda if she really thinks she wants to go downstairs and hang out with her relatives and hear stuff like how much she’s grown. Amanda tells her to swallow her goddamn pride and come down.

Busy eventually sanders down and makes up with her dad, though never actually apologizing for what she said. Lucy asks if Busy still wants to do her drum solo, but Busy has a “better idea.”

Which results in Neon Vomit coming by (because what else would they really be doing?) and playing a rock version of “O Sole Mio”. The episodes ends with everyone jamming out and having a grand old time.

This episode was alright to slightly dull for me. I feel like since there hasn’t been much conflict with the Ramone’s lately, the show had to create some mild drama that would resolve quickly. Plus showcasing Busy as a typical teen aka being as equal a wannabe as Amanda in regards to trying to impress people she likes, and thinking everything she cares about is the only thing that matters.

Next episode: Shit gets real.

 

 

Season 3, Episode 3: Tongue Tied

Hello peeps. As per usual, my life is being constantly rearranged. First off, my dog Georgia ended up passing away shortly after that last entry. RIP Georgia, always loving and missing you. School was no. Job was no. Melissa is NO. But seriously… I got some stuff going on, but I’m figuring it out. I don’t know why I always open up with my personal life stuff, but I like documenting where I am in life, especially when I finally do bust out and kick ass.

Anyway, I’m going to start by saying this is probably one of the more lame episodes of this season. I really hate episodes where things get misunderstood and could be easily figured out if people took two seconds to look something up on the computer/read a book, which is the entire concept of this dumb one. Oh well, let’s begin.

The episode opens with Amanda harassing Busy with some Cosmoesque quiz entitled “Are you Normal or Not?” Sadly, as a former Cosmo reader, I do not find it entirely unrealistic for a quiz to bare that sort of title. I mean, I remember reading an article saying that a man would get really turned on if you rubbed his penis like you were trying to build a fire with a piece of wood. So basically nothing they write can be ever be taken as actual journalism.

So one of the questions is in regards to chest size, which will be the entire focus of this episode.

Dom and Manny are in the living room watching a swim suit competition or something, as they are commenting on the women’s breasts in their usual pig-like manner. Busy comes in and criticizes on her brother’s stupid comments, which in turn has the boys comparing her chest to a surfboard. They also make sure to point out that Amanda is definitely not flat… it’s a bit creepy considering Amanda is still only 12 year’s old. Either way, it’s a pretty obvious the show is trying really hard to make Amanda look busty in comparison to Busy, as Amanda is seen wearing tight shirts this entire episode, while Busy is wearing a baggy shirt that wouldn’t even give Pam Anderson breast definition.

The girl’s are spending the weekend at Amanda’s dad’s place. While waiting for him to return, Amanda mention’s that her dad went to pick up his friend from the airport. I gotta point out that Leonard must be doing good for himself, since his last apartment looked like a bachelor pad piece of shit, and now he has a library and an Indian statue. It’s pretty chic. So anyway, Leonard comes back with his Frenchie friend, who just so happens to have two teenage sons named Jerome and Francois. Instantly both girls take a liking to these sub-par looking French lads. Leonard suggests they all go work-out at at his gym so he and his friend can get drunk on the sweet French wine he smuggled into the country. The girl’s agree, as they are excited to see these boys dripping with sweat or something along those lines. We all know Amanda and Busy are pervs from previous episodes.

In the next scene the girls are in the change room discussing who has dibs on who. Conveniently enough, they each happen to not like the same boy; with Amanda preferring Francois and Busy having a thing for Jerome.

And so here is where we start with the actions-leading-to-misunderstandings-that-form-the-whole-basis-of-this-episode portion. While in the gym there’s a woman with ample bosoms lifting weights. The guys are surprisingly more interested in her actual biceps then her boobs. Francois tells Jerome to be careful about going near her, because she might smell his reek. Yeah, this guy has a huge complex about his odor and apparently showers like five times a day.

Francois see’s Amanda and wanders on over to the bikes to work on sealing that deal. He calls her pretty, which in French is “jolie” which Amanda confuses as “jolly” and starts laughing like an idiot. I’m sorry, my French is pretty shitty due to a lack of ever using it, but at this point the girls would’ve been taking French in school, and at the very least should be understanding this basic stuff. Like seriously, if they wanted to do a “lost in translation” type episode, why did they pick a language that is the second official language of this country? I’m guessing cuz these actors are probably from Quebec and it was cheaper to use them then dealing with finding someone who spoke another language.

So yeah, while Amanda and Francois are being stupid together, Busy moves near Jerome and starts trying to get to know him by suggesting he use the weights. Jerome looks over at the woman with big boobs lifting weight and says to Busy that Busy’s arms are too small to lift weights. Cue the MISUNDERSTANDINGS because arms in French is “bras” so Busy thinks Jerome said her bra is small. He then keeps this stupidity going by saying the other woman’s “bras are grandoise” complete with a hand gesture that seriously makes it look like her’s talking about her boobs. I was thinking to myself while watching this that Francois and Jerome were seriously shafted having to spend their one tourist day in Toronto at a stupid condo gym, but then I realized that they had to have this set up happen for this entire dumb episode to occur and I DON’T KNOW WHY BUT IT ANNOYS ME. So here’s some screenshots cuz it’s kinda funny in a really ridiculous way.

In the washroom Busy tells Amanda about Jerome’s bra commentary, and even Amanda is like wtf that makes no sense. But Busy is convinced he was talking about her boob size, and now wants that golden info about “normal” breast size from Amanda’s teen magazine.

The next scene is basically Busy finding out she has smaller breasts than Amanda, at least in terms of band size (which really makes no difference, as that just means Busy is skinnier than Amanda). Amanda rightfully points out that it’s the cup that matters, and as previously mentioned, you can’t tell anything about Busy’s cup size because of her baggy as hell shirt. Anyway, Leonard comes by and tells them to take the boys to the mall because he’s not done hanging out with his friend and they are now gonna go get some high class escorts and spend a night on the town. He gives Amanda $30 which she plans to spend on creating a French feast and hopefully seduce the boys, but Busy is glum because she feels her lack of bosoms won’t help with enticing Jerome.

The gang all heads to the mall, where they all eat some hot dogs that Francois finds gross. Do they not have hot dogs in France? (Serious question, I have no idea). Busy still can’t over her boob issues, and Amanda is sick of hearing about it, so decides they need to resolve this matter by getting Busy a goddamn bra.

I think it’s interesting that the girl’s are experiencing the opposite issues that they other one had experienced first, i.e. Amanda got her period this summer and Busy is dealing with bra stuff now. So they go to the bra store and a similar montage to Amanda’s first bra buying experience happens, except it is sadly lacking an enthusiastic Russian sales woman.

Busy finally decides on a bra, and it turns out to be $28.50, which severely takes away from their French food fund. I seriously hate how expensive bras are.

They end up making this super gross looking Kraft cheese and lunch meat spread, and Francois makes a great unimpressed face when he see’s it. Also Amanda finally has a damn French-English dictionary. Maybe look up the word boobs in French and see if that’s what Jerome was referencing to before? Nah, that’s too logical.

Busy is in the washroom getting ready and see’s a box of Kleenex, deciding the best course of action is to stuff her bra. Jerome joins them at the dinner table and Amanda mentions how he takes a lot of showers, and Francois says it’s because he stinks (all in French of course). I feel bad for this guy, this is like a ticket to OCD thinking. Busy comes out with some noticeable boobs right now. I feel like that’s the actresses actual boobs and that’s why they made her wear that baggy shirt the whole show, because they look pretty natural. Yes I am analyzing Lani Billard’s rack way too much. But Amanda’s expression is pretty hilarious, like she’s in disbelief at how much this bra improved Busy’s chest size.

After dinner Francois is telling Jerome to take Busy and get lost so he can put the moves on Amanda. While in the kitchen putting away the food, Amanda comments on how Busy’s bra has made a huge difference which has Busy all joyful. Francois comes in and tells Amanda he wants to “speak secret” and that Busy should go outside with Jerome because he wants to do the same with her.

Outside, Jerome and Busy are hanging around awkwardly, and he suggests checking out the rental car. I noticed Busy understands the French a bit better than Amanda, despite her having a damn dictionary with her.

Inside, Francois has an acoustic guitar and decides he wants to serenade Amanda. He sings this song called “Alouette” but replaces Alouette with Amanda. According to Wikipedia it’s a children’s French-Canadian song (See I knew they were from Quebec) about plucking feathers from a lark who wakes the person up. So yeah, extremely romantic.

The scenes keep going back and forth between Jerome and Busy sitting in the car, and Amanda enduring Francois’ annoying singing. Slowly though, Amanda starts getting really sick of the song. I find it pretty opposite of Amanda’s character, because she’s all about the corny displays of affection.

So finally Busy’s like “fuck this, I’m going for it” and starts shuffling over towards Jerome. Jerome starts doing the same, but let’s his insecurities get the better of him, as he’s worried he stinks. He “accidentally” opens the trunk so he can run outside and sniff his pits. Poor guy seriously has a complex. Of course Busy is bummed because she was so close to scoring. While Jerome is outside, Busy uses this opportunity to adjust her Kleenex, but unfortunately doesn’t do a great job of it, as some is now sticking out of her shirt.

Amanda and Francois come out, with Amanda telling Busy she had to escape lest she kill him for not shutting up. Amanda immediately notices Busy’s Kleenex and starts saying shit like “I have to blow my nose” and “do you have any tissue?” I don’t really get this, because this is what people say when they’re trying to be subtle around people who speak English. Since these guys don’t, she literally could’ve just said “your tissue is showing.” Or maybe she was trying not to embarrass Busy, though to me it looked like Amanda took a bit of pleasure in discovering that Busy stuffed her bra.

The next day the boys are leaving and Busy is upstairs sulking about the whole event, even though it’s very obvious Jerome never noticed her Kleenex as he was too busy worrying about his own body issues.  Amanda comes up and tries to convince Busy to come say goodbye, but she feels too stupid about everything and tells her to get lost.

Jerome comes back inside and asks Busy if he can take her photo. She says no because she feels like a beast, but Jerome manages to convey in English that he thinks she is pretty. Busy is flattered and returns the compliment. He ends up taking a cute photo of both of them together. It’s kind of a shame that both their insecurities got in the way of anything happening between them as this was the first time it seemed that Busy was equally into a guy as he was into her.

For the most part I found this episode pretty pointless. Basically any episode where characters are introduced one time and never heard from again I don’t really care about. I guess Busy had to have a weird bra moment too though. But yes, this is probably in my bottom picks for this season.

Next episode: Busy becomes a trendy vegetarian and annoys everyone with her band bullshit.

Season 3, Episode 2: The Last Hurrah

Hi guys. Wow, according this I haven’t posted in a month… that’s sad, but I’m not really surprised. A lot has happened in my life since that last post. I started a new full-time job and full-time school online. I got engaged and then broke the ring by accident (still waiting for that situation to be fixed) and my dog is chronically ill, so we are constantly dealing with that. I’ve been stressed to say the least, but for the most part it has been good stress, I just suck at time management and need to work on that.

Anyway, I won’t bore you with my personal issues, let’s continue on with this second part of the camp themed episodes.

The episode opens with Lola, Busy’s bff from the prior episode, telling a ghost story to all the girls in the cabin. We can see now that Jessica and Amanda have settled in and everything is hunky dory….or is it? Anyway, as I mentioned, Lola is telling a ghost story about some dude named Sparky McClain who used to work at the camp who had kids and they somehow ended up drowning with a camp counselor, causing him to go crazy and begin to kill/eat people. So typical camp story bullshit.

At the climax of the story, Lola says that there was some investigation and nothing but a head was found, which prompts her to throw a cabbage at Amanda who screams her ass off. Everyone settles down laughing when they discover it’s just a vegetable and not an actual head. All of a sudden a face appears in the window scaring the piss (literally) out of Amanda.

Turns out it’s a bunch of guys from the boy’s cabin, and they have come to raid the girl’s cabins, probably looking for items to whack off into afterwards/this is what I am assuming teenage boys do with anything they steal from a teenage girl.

While this is all occurring, Busy is hollering at Amanda to turn on the goddamn lights, but Amanda just lays there kinda looking at what’s going on. The boys run out, and Busy, all annoyed, walks over to Amanda’s bed and asks why the fuck she didn’t turn the lights on. Well, remember what I said about the pissing herself? I wasn’t joking, she actually pissed her bed from the fright of the event. Lola comes over asking what’s wrong, and then smells the faint whiff of urine and looks at Amanda in disgust at soiling herself. She calls Amanda a wimp, and as usual Busy doesn’t stick up for her friend. So yeah, now Amanda has a new bitchy girl to deal with. What’s with this camp attracting assholes?

The next day Amanda is seen hosing off her sleeping bag. I seriously hope she did not sleep in her piss all night, because that would be disgusting. The other girls come out and we see that the boys have hung Lola’s bra up on the flag pole for all to see. So now the girl’s have decided it’s time to get revenge on their asses.

At breakfast, the rest of the girls in the cabin are making fun of Amanda pissing herself by telling her to go buy diapers. Cherry stands up and tells the girls to not even think about retaliating on the boys, because she’s way too busy banging her mullet boyfriend to deal with their shenanigans. Of course the girl’s won’t be listening to that though and plans for revenge begin to form in their little brains.

Later on at the beach Lola and Busy are busy whispering to each other about planning an attack on the boys. Amanda swims over and asks them what they are talking about. They’ve come up with the extremely original idea of doing the exact same thing the boys did to them and put a pair of their underwear on the flagpole. Amanda asks if she can join them, and then Busy starts making fun of her saying it’ll get dark and you know what happens when she gets scared. This pissed me off so much, because I’ve had friends in the past act like assholes to me while showing off to another friend too. Amanda basically tells them to fuck off and Busy convinces Lola to let her join them on their stupid revenge journey.

A new scene shows up where everyone in the cabin is outside tie dyeing stuff. Apparently some girl named Marlie eats everything, as Cherry walks by and tells her not to eat the dye. WTF? Is that not toxic or something? Anyway, Lola, Busy and Amanda are at a bench together planning their counter attack.  Lola says they should basically try to sneak up and grab the flag, but Amanda says that’s a dumb as shit idea because they’ll have the path guarded. So she suggests they steal a canoe and paddle across the bay and grab the flag from the shore because the boys are having some Indian Pow Wow and won’t be around. Busy thinks its a good idea and Lola begrudgingly agrees.

Later on the girls are getting ready to begin their lackluster adventure. They decide to use the excuse that they got sick from supper and are sleeping in their cabins if anyone asks where they are. Amanda decides to bring along a backpack, which for some reason makes Lola make fun of her. This girl is such a mega bitch.

They manage to sneak by two counselor’s playing crazy eights or something. Aren’t they suppose to be having sex somewhere causing a child to drown to bring about a mediocre horror franchise for years to come? Seriously, what a bunch of squares.

The girls sneak down to where the canoes are, but unfortunately for them, Cherry is hanging out with mullet, blocking the canoes. They then see a random canoe off to the side and decide to go for it. I always found this scene odd, because even though that canoe wasn’t near the rest of them, there’s no way Cherry and the other counselor’s would not have seen them paddling across the lake. Like a lone canoe with three girls in it in in open water would be hard to hide. Anyway, as usual, my logical thoughts can’t be applied to this program.

They paddle across the bay while the theme song to the show is being strummed by a banjo in the background. Amanda discusses her love of poetry which Lola makes fun of. Other random shit is said, but it’s pointless and I don’t care.

About halfway across the lake Amanda notices the boat is wet and it’s discovered they have taken a defective boat and it’s leaking. Amanda starts freaking out, prompting Busy to bitch slap her aka tell her to shut up. They start paddling their asses off (that sounds really weird) as quickly as possible towards the shore. Also, Amanda says this really whiny “what if we don’t make it??” comment, and it’s like…you’re wearing a life jacket, you idiot. P.S. side note: I once swam across a lake without a life jacket, something really stupid that I’m proud of.

They end up landing at some random beach that Lola thinks is the haunted beach from that scary story she told in the beginning. Lola and Busy are pissed off at Amanda and blame her for being in this situation.

The next scene shifts from what was early evening to night time as it is dark, even though it looks like the girls barely moved from their spot where the boat had landed. I dunno if that makes sense, but anyway, it’s bad editing on the show’s part.

They start walking and Busy freaks out like a little bitch because a spider lands on her shoulder. Amanda picks it off with no thought. Once again, I’m surprised at how wimpy Busy is in regards to outdoor stuff, while Amanda seems pretty chill with everything involved with being woodsy, it just seems very opposite of their tom boy and girly girl personas. The girl’s start moving in the direction they think could be the boy’s cabin, when Amanda declares she has to pee. Of course this means something is about to occur, because people on TV never pee for no reason. Busy tells Amanda to go pee while her and Lola check out the area and to meet back at the canoe.

Amanda find some really creepy looking abandoned shack and decides that’s a good spot to pee. I personally think Amanda’s pretty brave to even go near this place. I’ve seen enough horror movies to think this doesn’t look good at all.

Lola and Busy come wandering back, not finding jack shit in terms of the boy’s cabin. It also turns out that the boat is gone. So they are fucked.

Amanda comes running back towards the girls full of glee. Turns out, she finally got her beloved period. I think Amanda would be the only girl in the world who would be excited at the prospect of dripping blood out of her vagina in the middle of the woods. But, if she’s still been practicing with tampons like she was in the first season, she should be well prepared and fine. Either way, that’s a gross as hell situation. So yeah, she’s jumping around all happy, and naturally Busy bursts her bubble by telling her the boat is gone.

Lola starts slowly building towards a freak out by saying that Spark McClain took their canoe and probably lives in the abandoned shack Amanda found.

In the midst of Lola’s freak out, Busy trips over a log, which Lola thinks is a headless body. Amanda basically has to calm this idiot down, who legitimately thinks some guy who lives in the woods is going to cook and eat Busy. She does so by shoving her onto the ground and forcing her to listen to her walkman. Turns out Busy also sprained her ankle falling over that “headless body”. So basically shit is fucked up right now.

Except not really, they all end up going into that abandoned shack for the night. Turns out that backpack Lola mocked so much had all the stuff they needed for the night, i.e. a tensor bandage, the walkman, water etc. etc. Amanda and Busy talk more about her period, and Busy mentions how some girl named Ora in cabin five danced naked in the woods with her mom when she got her period. Amanda scoffs at the idea. Well, you tried Busy. I’m sure one day Amanda will flash something in your direction.

Busy finally apologizes about being an asshole to Amanda and then they have a talk about stuff that scares them, and Amanda brings up that her mom dying scares her the most. Geez show, way to turn this episode heavy.

The next morning sunlight streams through the shack and it appears they all survived the night. Amanda wakes up and goes outside, and discovers the boy’s camp.

Lola and Busy eventually get up, still looking for that stupid canoe. It’s clearly at the bottom of the lake by now, you dolts.

Amanda comes back, and suddenly Cherry is seen on the horizon in a boat. She looks pretty much like the Terminator in this shot, so you know all their asses are about to be annihilated.

Cherry hugs them, and then proceeds to bitch them out, telling them their asses are basically banned from summer camp for the rest of their lives. Well that sucks.

Later on, Jessica admits she was the one who told on them, because she found their sunken canoe by the water. She hands Amanda her autograph book (do people even have those nowadays?) and it has a little message saying they’ll be pen pals forever (do people even have those nowadays?) Of course Amanda agrees, but you know she’ll never talk to Jessica again, she won’t be around to make Amanda feel guilty and provide pity friendship.

Back in the cabin, everyone is getting ready to leave. Lola actually has the audacity to still criticize Amanda, despite being a huge ass baby the night before. Busy kinda tells her to shut up, but the girls in the cabin head home still believing Amanda is a wimp and that Lola is super cool, even though it’s entirely the opposite.

Amanda and Busy are the only ones left in the cabin. Busy’s feeling all bummed about the events, when suddenly Amanda stands up and pulls out the boy’s flag. Turns out she grabbed it in the morning when she woke up earlier. I really don’t get why she didn’t whip that thing out as soon as Lola started flapping her lip and gave her a big ol’ FUCK YOU. I seriously would’ve done that, that girl was asking for a public humiliation.

So yeah, Amanda has a pretty cool memento of her overall shitty time at camp. The End.

I really liked these camp episodes, despite the fact that they were filled to the brim with various assholes. I like the outdoors setting a lot, and like I said, I enjoy the summer time atmosphere.

P.S. I totally wrote most of this up last Saturday and it’s been sitting on my computer waiting to be done til now. I’m so goddamn busy guys, it’s not even funny. Most likely updates will be like once a month, potentially twice, while I get my shit together. So I hope you don’t decide to abandon me and keep reading, cuz I really do love writing these reviews.

 

Season 3, Episode 1: My Buddy Buddy

Hey gang, awwwwwww yaaaaas! We’re into season three, where Ready or Not reaches its pinnacle of greatness.

Maybe it’s because it partly takes place over the summer, which was my favourite season as a child and it brings back nostalgic memories. Maybe it’s because Amanda begins her transformative shift from awkward, shy girl to superficial, bitchy teen and she becomes a lot more entertaining/unbearable. Or maybe it’s because Danny’s final episode is within this season (I’ll disappoint you all right now and let you know his leaving is not a result of the character’s death… sadly, this isn’t Degrassi). It could be for a multitude of reasons, but either way, I’m stoked to start reviewing these episodes.

So let’s kick this shit into gear and begin.

The episode opens on a bus winding down a road near a lake. The children within are chanting some weird ass song about Camp Wanahowee (probably spelt wrong), the camp grounds where these next couple of episodes will take place.

Amanda and Busy disembark, with Amanda being super keen about the whole situation and Busy being a buzzkill. I’m really surprised at this, because Amanda does not seem outdoorsy at all, and Busy totally seems like she should be the one excited about being at camp. Anyway, this sort of sets up the ironic scenario of this episode, in that Busy ends up having a great time at summer camp, while Amanda doesn’t.

A counsellor named Cherry comes up to them and already shit has been fucked up by the camp’s administration, as Amanda and Busy are *gasp* not in the same cabin together, despite requesting it months ago.

Cherry tells them to calm the fuck down, disattach themselves from one another and go meet some new people. She then see’s some dude with a mullet and excitedly screams her head off, while running into his arms. So I’m going to assume at some point he probably popped Cherry’s cherry. Gawd I’m terrible.

Amanda goes off to her cabin, which is empty, so she wanders off to Busy’s cabin. Busy is now having the time of her life, participating in a pillow fight with the rest of the chicks in the room. Amanda asks Busy if she wants to go walk around, but Busy’s counsellor aka Cherry organized a scavenger hunt for them. Amanda’s clearly disappointed that Busy’s having a blast while she’s stuck in a questionable cabin situation. Amanda decides to go to the office to fix shit, and as usual Busy doesn’t care.

Amanda calls her mom at the office, but turns out Phyllis is already on her way to Barbados. A little girl overhears Amanda’s phone call occurring and asks her about name labels or some shit. Turns out this girl is named Jessica Niblet and she’s also in Amanda’s cabin. I just need to question…did they give this character the last name Niblet because she looks like a hamster? Also apparently this actress, Stacey Wheal, was in Billy Madison, so that’s random/slightly interesting.

Anyway, Jessica is a sweet, but dorky and awkward kid. It’s very easy to see later on why she’s not that popular with the other campers.

They hang out looking at bugs for a bit, and Amanda learns that Jessica is pretty smart and asks if she wants to study insects when she’s older. Jessica says no, she wants to be an entertainer, because “you get to be someone you’re not.” That’s pretty tragic commentary coming from a ten year old.

Amanda and Jessica return to the cabin and see a bunch of random bitches running around causing a ruckus. One of them throws a water balloon onto Amanda’s bed and soaks all her stuff.

Turns out the head of this group is a girl with a gap tooth named Heather. Her and the rest of the girls seem to have a real hate on for Niblet. I honestly have no clue why they hate this kid other than she’s always getting stuck in their cabin and she’s sorta nerdy, but that’s pretty easy enough to ignore.

So yeah, they’re totally the “Mean Girls” and Amanda wants in. Heather invites Amanda to go with them to the boys camp to see the male specimens, but Jessica cockblocks Amanda by reminding her that they were suppose to go watch some butterflies together. The other girls thus conclude Amanda must also be a mega nerd if she’s hanging out with Jessica, and take off.

Later on a three legged race is happening between what looks like Busy and Amanda’s cabins, as no other competitors are shown. Amanda’s paired with Jessica and Busy with her new bff Lola. Amanda and Jessica take the lead, and then promptly blow it by falling into the mud. Busy and Lola beat them, and the incident just validates the Mean Girls opinions that Amanda is just as lame as Niblet.

In a new scene, in what I am assuming must be the next day (because I think this is like a one week summer camp), the counsellor in Amanda’s cabin is handing out mail. How the hell did they get mail already? Anyway, NOT GONNA WORRY ABOUT IT.

Turns out Jessica’s uncle thought it would be the best course of action to send his niece a ventriloquist doll. Because something like that is definitely going to earn an outcast points with people who already think she’s a loser. The girls all think the doll, who happens to be named Buddy, is just as weird as Jessica. Amanda tries to be nice and compliments Buddy, which just makes Heather and the others continue to believe she’s a truly lame.

Amanda gripes to Busy about the Mean Girls thinking she’s a nerd as a result of Jessica. Busy barely sympathizes and runs off with Lola to the beach laughing at Amanda’s misfortune.

That night at a campfire, some half ass talent show is happening, and Jessica is showcasing her awful talents with Buddy to the whole camp. Busy gets a glimpse of Jessica in action, and tells Amanda that clearly the other bitches were right about Jessica because she’s extremely lame. Amanda of course feels bad for her and sticks up for Jessica. Finally the camp group starts singing a song, and Amanda get’s pushed out of the circle by the Mean Girls, officially making Amanda a social pariah.

I can’t help but feel a bit bad for Amanda, it is a sucky situation. At the same time though, I really dislike the fact that she is always seeking approval from the worst kinds of people, aka first Chrissy, and now these broads.

Once the campfire is done, everyone starts heading back to their cabins. The Mean Girls are walking along trying to decide how to deal with Jessica and Buddy and how fucking annoying she is. Once again, they act like Jessica constantly follows them around, and other than sharing a cabin with them, it doesn’t seem like she has anything to do with them. Fucking catty teenage girls. So anyway, Amanda uses this opportunity to butt into their conversation and suggesting kidnapping Buddy. The girls are impressed, as they believe Niblet will spend the whole time looking for Buddy and be out of their hair. So finally Amanda’s happy, because she’s gotten on the good side of a bunch of girls who treated her like shit up until this moment. Good to see Amanda’s keeping consistent in her relationship priorities.

The next day, while Jessica is off somewhere, the girls decide to put their master plan into action and get rid of Buddy. They each take turns fooling around, saying dramatic goodbyes. Heather than for some reasons starts shaking the shit out of Buddy, which results in his head flying off and smashing everywhere.

The girls are all pretty shocked, but you can tell none of them feel especially bad, except for Amanda.

They decide to throw Buddy’s head down an outhouse. I really don’t understand why they didn’t just leave the pieces on the floor and let Jessica find them. They could’ve easily pretended that Buddy fell off her top bunk somehow. But again, stupid tweens have to come up with elaborate, non-believable explanations.

The girls are all back hanging out in the cabin when Jessica comes back. She discovers Buddy’s headless body…actually no, now he has some sewn on head, which makes them look even more suspicious. Heather comes up with some bullshit story about some cabin raiding them and conveniently nothing is destroyed except for Buddy. Jessica is not buying the bullshit, and runs off. I feel really bad for this character, you know this girl must have such a hard life with her peer groups. After she runs out, the bitches all laugh their asses off, except Amanda who knows she did a horrible thing and looks sick to her stomach. P.S. Does it not look like Jessica is holding a dead child here? This is such a creepy screenshot.

Amanda for some reason continues hanging out with these bad seeds, and even smokes with them! Talk about a hypocrite. Season 1, Episode 2 Amanda would not approve. Of course she hacks up a lung, because people can never just smoke for the first time on TV without developing emphysema.

Later on, Amanda tells Busy she’s thinking of confessing, which Busy says she shouldn’t because everyone, including Jessica, will be pissed off. Amanda obviously feels terrible though, and it’s pretty obvious she’s gonna ‘fess up.

The next day Amanda tells Jessica the truth, and all the bitches get mad at her and storm out. Jessica of course knew the truth, and is basically like “k, whatever.”

Amanda leaves the cabin, where Cherry comes up to her and lets her know that two girls in Busy’s cabin have conveniently come down with chicken pox and had to be sent home, so Amanda can move in. Busy comes by and tells Amanda that she’ll help her move. Amanda then says that there are two empty bunks, and thus Jessica will be joining them. Busy kinda side eyes Amanda, but is cool with it. They all walk off happily to eat supper.

This episode was alright. I liked the camp setting a lot. Jessica, while weird, was a sympathetic character, and I’m glad she escaped from those cunts. I’m not sure Amanda even cared all that much about her, other than she was the first person to be nice to her, and she had a guilty conscious about the whole Buddy incident. I want Amanda to quit sucking up to assholes though. Anyway, as I said at the beginning, the next episode also takes place at the camp, and it’s a much better episode than this one.

I probably won’t be updating again til after Christmas, so hope everyone who reads this has a great holiday, whatever you are celebrating. Eat, drink and be merry y’all.

Season 2, Episode 13: Am I Perverted Or What?

Hey guys, long time no post. I was doing NaNo all of November, and it kind of made me hate writing, even though I’m glad it forced me to do it. So I wrote meself a novel, even though it’s only 110 pages, it’s a novel damn it! Anyway, also other stuff going on in my life, trying to figure stuff out you know. Time marches on.

But yeah, I know you guys are here for the R or N goods, and we’ve finally reached the end of Season Two. I’m pretty impressed I managed to get in two seasons in the first year I did this blog, hopefully I shall last until the bitter end. So lets begin.

The episode opens with the girls having a sleepover at Busy’s pad. They’re both taking turns lovingly brushing each others hair, while listening to a radio call in sex show. This seriously reminds me of The Sunday Night Sex Show with Sue Johanson (Canadians who read this will know what that is). Slash off topic, but I totally called in once because my friends dared me to, and they asked me a question about oral sex that I answered so badly because I was 12 and didn’t know much about oral sex.  BUT ANYWAY.

The person who called in was complaining about their boyfriend kissing terribly, which has the girls recalling the fellows they have kissed in their lives. Apparently Troy was all about the tonsil hockey, which Busy hated (quelle surprise), and Danny does some “dried fish lip thing” which I can only assume means he puckers up and doesn’t move his lips at all. I hate that shit, so I definitely feel for Amanda.

So Amanda’s bitching about Danny kissing terribly and wants to go to the next step and French, despite Busy telling her it’s gross. But Amanda knows by now not to go by anything Busy says because of their vastly different sexual preferences.

The next caller calls in and it sounds a lot like Dom. He’s complaining about how his girlfriend has some weird expensive sunglasses fetish which is taking him to the poor house. Busy and Amanda are utterly shocked at the thought of Dom banging in the household, despite the fact that he is a healthy sixteen year old male and that really isn’t surprising whatsoever.

The next scene is at Amanda’s place and Danny is wearing some shirt that says “fish forever”. It looks like a band t-shirt of someone like Hootie and the Blowfish, but I think it’s actually some joke about his fish kissing techniques before. Also I need to point out, didn’t Danny just leave for New York in the last episode? It is also implied that he’s gone basically the whole summer based on what happens in a later episode, which leads me to believe that this episode was actually filmed before the Flunky one. Slash yet again, me caring way too much about insignificant issues.

I guess his breath smells bad or something because he keeps checking it and reaching for breath mints that are non-existent. Amanda and Danny sit around awkwardly until she decides to read his palm. Once again, I’ll repeat what I said last entry, these two have NO chemistry. Not just sexual, even personality wise, as this scene really gives off awkward first date vibes and they’ve been dating for at least a couple months now.

After awhile they finally go to kiss, and Amanda freaks him out by trying to French him. Danny rejects her because of his smelly breath. OMG you live right downstairs, go excuse yourself to brush your fucking teeth!

Amanda tries to broach the subject of kissing, asking Danny if he has any desire to go “the next step” and start French kissing on a regular basis. Despite being a straight(?) teenage male, Danny does not jump at the chance to do more stuff with a girl, and actually implies that Amanda’s being slutty by saying “I thought most girls wanted to go slow.” Of course this annoys/gives Amanda a complex, while Danny sits there checking his stupid breath still. Considering you aren’t giving up the goods Danny, I think you can stop caring about that.

The next day the girls are chilling in Busy’s backyard and Busy brings up potentially blackmailing Dom about having sex at home in order to get him to do shit for her such as driving her places and cleaning her room.

They come up with the idea that they need to find evidence of Dom’s fornication, and figure out that all those sunglasses would be perfect. While this is happening, Busy also asks Amanda to put sunscreen on her back (I’ll refrain from any comments).  The bottle ends up being empty, so Busy tells her to go upstairs and grab some from the bathroom.

Amanda heads upstairs and hears Dom singing in the shower. She not so subtly enters the bathroom, hoping to grab a glimpse of that Italian sausage.

Dom takes it pretty well, considering he just caught his little sister’s friend committing voyeurism. Also I need to point out that that white stuff on his face looks really questionable. I know it’s probably shampoo but…. Ok I’m gonna stop.

This incident FREAKS Amanda out. The next scene she’s at home in bed listening to that radio sex show again. The caller is discussing their voyeurism, and the radio host tells them they have issues and that anyone who obsesses about sex has issues and needs professional help. So now Amanda thinks she’s a nymphomaniac and is stressed out which prompts a Ready or Not dream sequence…ah it’s been awhile, hasn’t it?

Amanda’s back in the bathroom doing the exact same thing she did in real life aka spying on Dom. Except now he’s singing On Top of Old Smokey in a sexy tone (in the real event he was singing it, but normally). Then he peeks out and has these HUGE sunglasses on and also all that white shit is all over his body, so now we know Amanda also thought it was jizz. Then he remarks on how much fun being a pervert is, and offers Amanda some novelty sized sunglasses and says “join the club.” She wakes up in horror, despite the fact that it was a very G rated “sex” dream.

Amanda looks up the definition of pervert in the dictionary, because she is quite sure she is one.

The next day Busy is in Dom’s room looking for the sunglasses while Amanda stands around freaking out because of her sex dream about Dom. Busy ends up finding three pairs of expensive sunglasses, but then the phone rings and she runs off to get it. Amanda then tries on some of the sunglasses right as Dom comes in and is like wtf are you doing in my room. Amanda stammers something and Dom offers her the sunglasses, saying he “only wore them once” basically proving he is the caller. Busy comes in and makes up some excuse for why they were in his room. Dom tells them to get lost, announcing he’s “taking a shower” and then winks at Amanda, lolz.

The girls end up going to some sunglasses store so Busy can confirm that the sunglasses Dom bought are the same as the caller on the sex show as the person said each were $19.95 a pair. How many of us are fully over this plot line, raise their hands.

Anyway, Amanda decides to stay outside and naturally there is some cray cray ranting on about everyone having “filthy thoughts” and how change is vital for inner salvation. I love how outside events always manage to coincide with the issues going on with the girls at the moment, it’s always super convenient. Slash imagine if this was your claim to fame? “I was the crazy ranting guy on Ready or Not.” I kind of want to find out if this guy did anything after this.

So of course I looked, and his name is Hugo Dann and he is listed as “Wackoguy” hahaha. He was mostly in TV movies and hasn’t acted since 2005 according to IMBD. I’m sure your lives are all the more enriched for knowing that. Your welcome.

Amanda goes home and is still grappling with her inner sex demons. She decides to hide the radio and then take down her wall of half-naked men. Bye Edward Furlong.

Later on Danny asks to meet up with Amanda. He confesses to her that the reason why he didn’t want to French was because he ate a falafel that had a bunch of garlic and hot sauce and his breath was rank. He decides to give her what she’s craving and moves in for some tongue action, but now that Amanda’s grown this complex she freaks out and tells him they should continue going slow. Danny asks if they can still kiss the normal way. Amanda gets all pissed and storms off leaving Danny confused as fuck, probably thinking “bitches be cray.”

Later on at school there appears to be some informal health class going on. P.S. I totally thought they were on summer vacation by now, based on the feel of this episode, but anyway. The teacher is answering anonymous questions from a box, and one question is about masturbation. It’s really obvious that Busy wrote it as she looks totally uncomfortable and in distress when all the other girls are grossed out by it. Newly found prude Amanda is even judgmental, saying “it’s not right.” So there, we learned a new fact today, Busy likes to double click the mouse. To be honest though, I’m surprised it was her and not Amanda who masturbated first.

Later on, Busy is trying to figure out a third piece of evidence to this Dom sex caller thing. Amanda’s over it, but for all the wrong reasons aka she thinks it’s all too perverted, meanwhile it’s just all too annoying. Busy found some porn magazines under Dom’s bed and Amanda freaks out, calling Busy and her family a bunch of pervs. They hear the caller on the radio again, and now he’s saying the girlfriend is making him wear barets when they bang. Busy is now convinced it’s not Dom because he hates hats. Uhhh I think most guys would deal with a stupid hat to get laid. Anyway, Amanda then says she’s glad it’s all over with so Busy can stop being a perv. They then go back and forth calling each other pervs until Busy decides they should call the sex radio show to see who the real perv is.

Also I had to get this screenshot. At least Dom likes classy porn.

Amanda calls the radio show about her encounter with Dom and babbles the question so quickly that the host can’t understand her. Busy finds this incredibly hilarious and laughs her ass off while Amanda runs away.

The last scene they are in the tent discussing everything that’s happened. Amanda still feels fucked that she was attracted to Dom’s naked body even though Dom is hot and that is totally normal. Busy tells her its ok because she was just curious, the same way Busy was with the porn mags. I think this conversation sets in stone both Busy and Amanda’s sexuality. They seriously should’ve made Busy be a lesbian on the show, but I digress.

Busy brings up the masturbation question and asks Amanda if she thinks that the person who wrote it was abnormal. Amanda says no and then Busy more or less admits she wrote it. They then have a tickle fight before Dom comes by and gets his sunglasses from Busy because he’s off to his girlfriend’s place to fornicate. He then tells them if they are going to call into a sex radio show that they should learn to disguise their voices. They freak out and laugh, the end. As if we didn’t know the caller was Dom in the first place.

Overall I really liked this episode. You rarely see these types of episodes featuring girls, it’s always two guys feeling weird about their sexual awakenings, aka Degrassi with Arthur and Yick and countless others. It’s good for girls watching to know that if they too spy on their friend’s hot older brother, they aren’t pervs.

That’s the end of Season Two, and I’m so so excited for Season Three, it is by far my favourite season. So many great episodes coming up.

Glad to be writing in this again, I promise it won’t be as long between a review next time! (mostly promise).

 

Season 2, Episode 12: Flunky

Hi everyone, just FYI anyone who was friends with me on Facebook and coming to the blog from there; I have deactivated my Facebook for now. I may or may not bring it back in the future, but for now I don’t feel like seeing or dealing with Facebook. So you should totally follow my blog so it can go up from 8 followers… it would be sweet if I could at least get 10 followers, that looks so much better than 8.

I’m also attempting NaNoWriMo aka National Novel Writing Month, which is exactly what it sounds like… writing a novel in a month. I’ve never tried it before, so I expect some pretty questionable results. I should probably be doing that now, but since this blog is my procrastination station I will hold off for a bit.

Anyway, onto Ready or Not. Can you guys believe that it’s the second last episode of season two? Me either, I’m impressed I’ve come this far. Well, on with the show.

The show opens with a shot of Peter in the band room playing his guitar with Busy.

Just kidding, it does no such thing, we all know Peter is probably in foster care now.

Ok the show actually opens on what looks like a school newspaper office. Amanda and Busy are among a bunch of nerds and Amanda’s complaining to Busy about Phyllis’ new boyfriend Ron. Busy, being a clueless child of non-divorced parents, tries to spin the upside of it by saying at least her mom won’t be lonely i.e. is getting laid. Amanda’s like “whatfuckingever” and carries on with her brooding.

Naturally Emma is working here and has some poll results for Amanda regarding the eighth graders. Apparently Troy was voted “Most Likely to Succeed” and Chrissy “Least Likely” but also “Most Popular.” Remember Chrissy, guys? Yeah, me neither. She’s been seen once or twice this entire season so far. It turns out Amanda’s also on the poll as “Teacher’s Pet”. As if summoned on cue, Chrissy shows up and starts insulting Amanda and the yearbook committee by calling them huge ass nerds.

The next day in the class, Amanda is still whining to Busy about the teacher’s pet thing. She learns through Busy’s guilty silence that she also voted for her, lol. The teacher asks Amanda to stand up and talk to the class about yearbook shit, but then another teacher comes by with Chrissy in tow. Everyone starts whispering about Chrissy, and it’s basically implied that Chrissy is kind of retarded and needs to be sent back down to grade seven English because she is failing.

After class the teacher asks Amanda if she wouldn’t mind tutoring Chrissy so she can catch up before final exams. Of course Amanda gives in, and Chrissy is super annoyed at the thought of being tutored. I think if anyone should be annoyed it should Amanda, like I’m sure she wants to be helping this girl who is always a total bitch to her.

At lunch, Melissa and the long haired guy who rammed into the Busy in the prior episode are questioning why Chrissy wasn’t in English. She comes up with some bullshit excuse about having to do a study workshop and that’s where she’ll be for the next couple of weeks. They then go to hang out, and we see a shot of the clock with the time that Chrissy and Amanda agreed to meet up at to study.

Amanda’s then seen at the libary, and it’s ten to one when she finally gets a clue that Chrissy isn’t coming and takes off. She joins Busy outside, and see’s that Chrissy is outside with the “cool kids” having some weird ass dance party with no music…just clapping.

Amanda confronts Chrissy, who then insults her by calling her “little miss perfect” and “squeaky clean” and then takes off with her posse. At this point I would be telling the teacher too fucking bad, I’m not helping this idiot out… but it’s Amanda so that won’t be happening.

The next morning at Chrissy’s house we see Chrissy getting ready for school by putting on tons of makeup. Her sister points out that she doesn’t really need it because she’s already pretty. Chrissy of course knows she only has her looks to ride on, and tells her sis that you gotta milk your good points for as long as you can. Their mom runs into the bathroom whining about Chrissy not waking her up for work and Chrissy points out it’s not her fault her mom was out with her scumbag boyfriend all night. Chrissy’s mom more or less calls her an idiot and tells her to get breakfast ready for her sister. I guess this is trying to establish that Chrissy’s home is slightly dysfunctional. But I don’t care, because Chrissy is a bitch and I don’t feel bad for her, but nice try show.

At school it looks like photo day is occurring. Yeeeeah.. I’m gonna say Monkey Ears is not helping his case by posing for photos like this:

Amanda seems to be in charge of running the photo day… and she wonders why she got voted as teacher’s pet. Busy’s helping Amanda out with it, because apparently Danny was suppose to, but now he’s going back to New York soon and has “too much on his mind.” Ok, I’m sure this photo day is really taxing, Danny.

Chrissy comes in and parades herself down to get her picture taken, while a bunch of dudes whistle at her. Busy and Amanda point out how gross all the guys at their school for drooling over Chrissy, and Amanda states she’s happy Danny doesn’t act that way. Well the return of his rapist gaze would seem to suggest otherwise.

Later on in class, the teacher asks Amanda to give an example of some grammar rule because she got perfect on her last test. Amanda pretends not to know, I guess in order to show off to Chrissy that she’s not as smart as she seems. I never understood this in shows. Why is being smart considered a bad thing? Stupid kids.

In a new scene Danny and Amanda are waiting outside their apartment for Danny’s cab to take him to the airport to go back to New York. Amanda starts complaining how she hates being seen as smart, because everyone thinks she’s a nerd and doesn’t think she’s sexy like Chrissy. Danny agrees Chrissy is sexy, but then says Amanda’s “cute and nice”. Pro tip guys; don’t call some other girl sexy and then refer to your own girlfriend as cute. The cab comes and Danny takes off. Can I just say Danny and Amanda have zero chemistry? They don’t even kiss each other goodbye. Such a dull relationship, even Troy and Busy kissed once in awhile.

The next day Amanda’s taken her trying to impress Chrissy status to a whole other pathetic level, as she is now sporting the exact same type of hairstyle as Chrissy. She also asks Busy if she wants to skip class. Busy tells her no, because she doesn’t want to fail and school’s done soon anyway so it’s pointless.

In another scene Chrissy meets up with Melissa and that long haired guy and they imply that they know she’s in grade seven English now, and the guy calls her a dumb blonde. Melissa tells her it would be weird to go to high school without her and Chrissy has a freaked look on her face, as it is suddenly dawning on her that she may be fucked if she doesn’t start working hard now. I guess being stupid isn’t something you should be striving for after all, is it now Chrissy?

In class the teacher announces a quiz tomorrow, and Chrissy basically demands for Amanda to meet her after school in the library to study. Busy asks Amanda if she’s actually going to go, considering how much of an asshole Chrissy has been to her. But of course Amanda, who is so desperate for approval from the wrong people, says she’ll go because maybe Chrissy will quit thinking she’s a nerd. Busy just makes her usual face at Amanda’s usual stupid logic.

In the library Chrissy and Amanda are studying and it turns out Chrissy isn’t as big of an idiot as she makes herself appear, and answers a grammar question correctly. Even Amanda says she’s not as dumb as everyone thinks she is, hahaha.

But then Chrissy see’s Melissa and her boy and freaks out and runs off. You know, Chrissy and Amanda should become friends, they both care way, way too much about how they appear to other people.

Later on Amanda’s talking to Busy on the phone about Chrissy’s predicament of being popular while pretending to be stupid. It’s fucking dumb, and I don’t care. Then Phyllis mentions she’s going on a date with Ron. Amanda calls him a “goon” and Phyllis says “just because he dresses conservative doesn’t mean he is.” Gross, they probably do weird sex acts together. Blech…Phyllis is the WORST.

The next day in class during the test, Amanda thinks its a fine course of action to help Chrissy cheat.

Naturally they get caught. After class Amanda apologizes for cheating, but Chrissy gives major attitude and tries to deny the cheating. The teacher therefore gives Chrissy detention for a week, while Amanda got off with a warning. Chrissy gets pissed and stomps off, angry that Amanda wasn’t punished.

After school Chrissy bails on the detention and Amanda see’s her and chases after her, telling her she agrees it wasn’t fair she got off without a punishment. Chrissy then lets loose on Amanda, shoving her twice, calling her a brown noser, a geek and a wannabe. Finally Amanda can’t stands no more, and pushes Chrissy back and tells Chrissy she doesn’t know anything about her at all. It’s about time Amanda finally stood up for herself, but Chrissy wasn’t wrong in saying that Amanda is a wannabe, because she is the portrait of one in this episode.

P.S. I dunno how I got this screenshot, but it’s cracking me up.

At home, Chrissy’s mom seems over it at Chrissy’s behaviour, and tells her that the school called and said if she failed her exams she’d fail the year. Just a side note: I know a lot of Canadian shows have episodes where kids fail a grade aka Joey in Degrassi, but I’m almost positive they aren’t allowed to hold kids back a grade.. at least not in elementary school. I dunno, I went to Catholic school so maybe it was different, but I never saw or heard of a kid being held back a year. The mom then goes on to say that Chrissy should be more like her smart sister. So she basically implies that one of her daughter’s is stupid and one is ugly.

The next day at school Chrissy musters up a semi-convincing apology to Amanda.

So I guess that convinced Amanda, because she’s at Chrissy’s place tutoring her again. Chrissy’s mom goes off on a date with her boyfriend “Nick” who Chrissy calls “Dick.” Amanda and Chrissy bond over the fact that their moms are desperate and dating losers.

Anyway, so the episode basically ends with Amanda and Chrissy hanging out and I guess sorta becoming friends, but not really because it’s obviously the end of the school year and I’m gonna go ahead and assume that Chrissy passed her exams and goes off to high school, because she’s never seen again.

As I mentioned, that’s the end of the Chrissy character. I find it odd that she is featured so little throughout this season, when she was a big part of season one. This show isn’t very good at establishing non-main characters, other than the girl’s family members. I guess it’s sorta realistic that way, as people do drift in and out of our lives. Oh well, Chrissy was annoying anyway.

Next episode is probably one of the funniest in the entire show, and it’s the last one of season two!

Season 2, Episode 11: Monkey See, Monkey Do

Hello faithful readers…the last couple of weeks for me have been incredibly stupid. Can we all just agree that 2015 needs to end? At least there’s only two more months of this damn year.

Anyway, I’m so not excited about this episode. I hate episodes featuring non-main characters, so basically anything about anyone other than Amanda or Busy. But the featured character in this isn’t even a secondary character; this dude was literally only in the Chrissy/Justin closet sex episode and maybe in the background of a couple other ones. In NO way does he warrant having his own episode.

But whatever, at least he gets smacked around in it, and considering I don’t give a shit about this character, I don’t feel bad saying that. Ok I’m done bitching, lets go on with the review.

The episode opens with the Ramone family once again watching basketball. Everyone looks annoyed as we hear the faint sound of drumming in the background, so we know Busy is practicing drums and pissing everyone off.  Sam and Frankie have a freak out on Lucy and tell her to get Busy to stop playing her damn drums.

Lucy goes into Busy’s room and Busy is playing the same generic drum beat she plays every episode. Lucy tells her to stop with the fucking drums and Busy gets all offended because when is she suppose to practice. How about not at night, Busy? Lucy actually tells her to quit “torturing the family” HAHAHAHA. I love how Lucy is zero fucks given about the other Ramone’s feelings now. But of course that comment offends Busy even more. There’s no real resolution, but you can tell Busy is all like “my family doesn’t support my music dream” which will be an element to this episode’s themes.

The next day Busy is bitching to Amanda about how her family is basically non-supportive of her aspirations of being a famous musician. Busy’s dad even has the gall to suggest she become a dental hygienist…holy fuck Sam stop being so logical. Amanda runs off and it fades to a new scene…I actually think this is the first fade out in this show (it’s sad that I noticed this, isn’t it?)

So Busy is practicing and this dude with some luscious locks comes in and basically just starts jamming with her. No introductions for the viewers, we’re just suppose to accept that this kid and Busy know each other and are now jamming together.

Mr. Boil comes in and calls their music crap and tells them to hit the road because the band has “real music to make.” Mysterious guy mutters under his breath that that’s “subject to debate.” So we know this guy is a baaaad boy. FYI this guy’s hair is a tad too long for my personal tastes, but I was alllll about this look when I was a teen in the 90s… like I wouldn’t let my boyfriend cut his long hair because I was obsessive haha. Ahhh I miss those times.

Busy walks home with this guy and he tells her that his dad works at some studio and promised to book him studio time when he’s ready. He tells Busy that he needs a drummer and if she’s good enough she can join him. So Busy is pretty stoked that she may finally get a chance to play music with another musician.

The next day Busy excitedly tells Amanda that she’s playing music with Peter. Finally we learn this guy’s damn name. Amanda’s all excited for Busy, because apparently Peter is a rock God at Cornelius. And for once in her life, Amanda doesn’t use Busy hanging out with a dude as an excuse to try and hook Busy up with him. Guess Amanda’s finally getting wise to Busy’s actual sexual preference. They pass Peter in the hall and say hi, but he’s all reclusive and trying to hide what looks like a bruise on his face. Ugh…yeah…gonna be one of THOSE episodes.

After school Amanda and Busy are walking and another long haired dude rams into Busy and drops her books all over the place. Busy calls him a dumbass and he starts kicking them around. Peter appears out of nowhere and tells the guy to pick up the goddamn books or his ass is grass. The guy gets lippy so Peter puts him in a headlock or something similar, and the wimp gives in and picks up Busy’s shit. Peter tells Busy he’ll drop by later to see her drum kit. I retract what I said one second ago, because Amanda totally uses this incident to say that Peter is crushing on Busy because he “defended her honour”. Busy of course says nope, and he’s fighting only cuz he’s a dude. It’s like Busy just looks for reasons to not accept that a male might like her.

Later on Busy is playing hockey with her brothers and Sam and Peter comes waltzing up. Dom makes some remarks about him being cute and a “fashion plate” because he has long hair. Sam tells Elizabeth to “keep the door open”. I swear to God every father must say these words to their daughters at some point. I was having flashbacks myself. Yeah based on this screen shot, I’d say you have NOTHING to worry about, Sam, Busy looks anything but hetero here. Like don’t seriously tell me if you didn’t already know that Peter was a guy that you wouldn’t think this is a lesbian couple. Don’t fucking lie to me or to yourself.

In Busy’s room, of course nothing scandalous is happening, so we learn about Peter’s home life, and how his mom and older brother moved “out west” and he lives alone with his dad. Busy asks why his mom left and Peter says his dad claims “he was a handful when he was younger” which translates to his parents couldn’t fucking deal with parenting him properly and his mom ran off and his dad probably has rage issues as a result aka spoiler alert does have rage issues. This is such a staple of these abuse episodes, it’s pretty borderline predictable now. Busy I guess feels bad based on the piano in the background, and invites him to stay for supper.

Peter hits it off pretty well with the Ramone’s, complimenting Lucy’s cooking and even somehow being convincing enough to have Sam ask him to write a jingle for the butcher shop. Does Sam have commercials on TV? Who would even hear this so-called jingle? Ah well, like any of us actual care. Also, it is SO HARD to not find screenshots of them looking like a same sex couple.

The next day Peter starts acting like a total diva asshole and gets all annoyed with Busy for having Amanda hang around and listen to their music. Busy acts all meek and mopey, which is weird because normally she’d bitch out anyone who treated her shitty. It’s kinda weird to see. Amanda’s actually the one who shakes her head at Pete’s behaviour and walks off.

Later on, just as things are looking more cheerful, Mr. Boil returns and threatens to give Peter detention for I guess using the band room again. Busy gets to leave, and Pete tells her to come by his place later.

Next scene we see Peter storm out of the school and key Mr. Boil’s car. Amanda also see’s it and is pretty shocked. Guess Amanda’s into every other type of boy except the hooligan.

Busy arrives at Peter’s house and his dad seems too cool to be true…so obviously you know he’s got evil brewing within. He encourages Busy and Peter to jam together and if she’s serious about her music, she should totally consider playing with Peter. Peter apologizes for being a jerk earlier to Busy and uses that stupid “artists are temperamental” bullshit excuse. I hate that garbage, just admit you’re an asshole.

The next day at lunch, Amanda talks to Busy about Peter and asks her if he’s always yelling and being a jerk. Busy spews the same excuse Peter gave to her to Amanda. Amanda then tells Busy she saw Peter key Mr. Boil’s car and Busy tries to brush it off by saving Boil deserved it, though you can totally tell she doesn’t really believe that and feels awkward that she’s befriending a potential psycho.

Later on, Busy is hanging out at Peter’s listening to him play a little ditty that he wrote. Busy proclaims how good it is and asks if it’ll go on the demo tape, but Peter says no because his dad thinks its lame and the dad is apparently also his manager. Well we all know how well that usually turns out in the music world.

Busy asks him if he keyed Boil’s car, and Peter basically avoids out right admitting it, but you can tell Busy knows he did it.

Peter’s dad comes downstairs and it’s pretty obvious he’s a bit hammered. He even gives some cans of beer to Busy and Peter. He decides to start strumming the guitar a bit and Peter casually mentions some hand move that would make it easier. Immediately the mood shifts, as you can tell Peter’s dad does not take well to criticism. Peter than makes an even bigger mistake by smirking at Busy which then sets in motion his dad hulking out on his ass. Peter tries to calm his dad down, but he can see there’s no going back and yells at Busy that he’ll see her tomorrow aka get the hell out so you don’t see my dad beating my ass. Busy runs off while we hear the sound of fists hitting flesh in the background.

The next day at school Busy tells Amanda about Peter’s beating and Amanda of course says Busy should tell someone. Busy says she can’t because she’s his friend and he trusts her and maybe this is the first time this happened blah blah aka excuses people use not to do shit when they know people are being abused.

Peter’s at his locker and Busy goes to say hi and touches his arm and Peter flinches in pain, so you know his dad gave it to him good. Busy talks about how he should tell, and Peter says more excuses such as they were fooling around, the artist temperamental crap again etc. Busy is unconvinced, but Peter says his cray cray dad booked them studio time to start the demo, probably because he felt guilty, and tells Busy they could start recording on Friday. Busy seems happy and invites Peter over to her place to practice.

The next scene Peter is playing hockey with Dom, Frankie and Busy. But it’s obvious that Peter is pretty aggressive, and basically collides with Dom into the net, knocking Busy over to get a goal. Dom calls Peter a “birdbrain” which sets his fuse off and he begins to beat Dom’s ass. Just as this is occurring Manny pulls up on his motorcycle and saves the day by driving Peter off. So obviously there is rage within, which is pretty common in these abuse situations.

The next day at school, Amanda and Busy are conversing in their usually girl’s washroom setting. Busy points out that Peter’s anger is just as bad as his dads, and Amanda says its probably because he’s constantly getting hit. Busy tries to find reasons not to tell and again uses being his friend. Amanda says if you are a real damn friend you’d tell.

So Busy was pretty easily convinced, as the next scene is her coming out from telling the guidance counselor about Peter’s beatings. We then see Peter walk by with some social workers and he says the cliche “I thought you were my friend.” Busy quietly replies “I am.” While the sad piano plays in the background, ending the episode.

Aaaaand that’s the end of Peter as a character. Do we find out any resolution with his abuse? Of course not, because that would require an ongoing story line, and he’s not an important character. What was important was to showcase that abuse is bad, but never what happens afterwards. This is so common on Canadian kid’s TV shows and I find it pretty tiresome. I wish the could’ve had the balls to do something super controversial, like Sam secretly beating Frankie every night with jumper cables (yes, shameless reddit reference).

So yeah, overall for not remembering this episode at all, it was ok. But again, also utterly forgettable.

I can’t believe there are only two more episodes of Season 2.

 

Season 2, Episode 10: The New Deal

Hey guys. I just realized I haven’t written an entry since Labour Day weekend, which is shitty on my part. i wanted to try and update this blog once a week and now it’s been almost a month. I’ve been pretty tired lately, and just trying to get myself in order. But anyway, enough of my lame ass excuses onto the review.

Now this is the episode where I really start to dislike Phyllis as a character. So much stuff she did in this episode just struck a nerve with me…but yeah, we’ll start from the beginning.

The episode opens with Busy, her parents and Amanda at what looks like some super lame community meeting on safety. Amanda’s all annoyed because her mom is late. Ok, in this case I’m sorta supportive of Phyllis, because honestly this looks boring as fuck.

So just as the meeting is ending, Phyllis comes rushing in. Amanda’s irritated because she missed the whole thing, but Phyllis really seems to give two shits, because she was at her art class. Yes now that Phyllis is a single lady she’s branched out more and is trying new things.  Unfortunately many of these new things are extremely questionable as is evident in the next scene.

Amanda and Phyllis arrive home and Phyllis is really eager to share with Amanda why she missed the meeting. Phyllis tells her it was because she modeled for the art class…except she was buck ass naked while doing it.

Amanda pretty much reacts how any normal teenage girl would upon learning her mother did this, i.e. a combination of shock, mortification and disgust.

While Phyllis on the other hand is full of glee because her nakedness resulted in her scoring a date with her creepy art teacher after class.

The next scene Amanda and Busy are walking to school, and Amanda’s look has now evolved into the Claude Tanner look of Degrassi High. Yes Amanda’s look will evolve later on again, but thankfully for the most part it becomes better. I’d say this is the pinnacle of her terrible outfit choices. But anyway, their discussing Phyllis’ naked art adventures and Busy is asking hilarious questions like “did she have on an undershirt or socks?” Omg imagine socks. That’s the worst look ever, naked with socks. Don’t trust anyone who doesn’t take their socks off when they get naked.

Amanda invites Busy over, but Busy can’t because she needs to help her dad. Amanda’s disappointed because she wanted Busy to add something funny in her letter to Danny, and Busy rightfully points out that all Amanda needs to do is tell him what her mom’s been doing.

Amanda comes home and her mom invites her to see the artwork she posed nude for at the community centre. Of course Amanda’s like hell fucking no, as well as freaking out because she’s worried people will recognize her mom. Seriously…how good could these art students actually be? But Phyllis just keeps using the “it’s art!” excuse to justify her nudist bullshit. Phyllis has also decided to start dressing like an African man. Why can’t these Zimm women wear normal clothes?

As she’s leaving, Phyllis reminds Amanda that some handy man will be by later to fix their shitty door.

Later on the handy man drops by, and Amanda checks his ID before letting him in. I feel like this was added in as like a public service announcement. How many kids would actually do this?

So as the guy is fixing the door’s he starts chatting up Amanda about writing. This Justin Trudeau look-a-like then says he would “love to read her stuff sometime” which is Amanda’s kryptonite aka a man paying attention to her. So she’s immediately smitten.

The handy man, whose name is actually John, goes off to wash up and while he’s in the can Phyllis comes home. As soon as Phyllis gets her sights on John she begins heavily flirting with him, much to the mild annoyance of Amanda, who is not used to her mom being so brazen with gentleman callers.

The next day at school, Amanda is telling Busy all about how her mom is becoming a sex maniac and she is utterly embarrassed by it. Busy of course agrees that it’s messed up when you mom starts acting sorta slutty.

Later on Amanda’s at home while her mom gets ready to go out dancing with her friends and Amanda doesn’t want her to. Amanda also talks about how she doesn’t want her mom to bring any men home. This scene really resonated with me, because I had very similar things happen with my mom. I hated when she went out with her friends at night and I was very much an asshole to her when she separated from my dad and was dating her first boyfriend. I can honestly see it from both Amanda and Phyllis’ points of view, though I do side more with Amanda because I remember at that age it really doesn’t feel right for your mother to be going out and dating, especially after your parents separate. I think the parent should really give it at least six months, for the kids sake. On the other hand I know parents are people too, and have the right to their own lives. Anyway, enough introspective, it is clear that Phyllis is moving on with her life and Amanda is not ok with it.

The next day Amanda and Busy go to the community centre where they see the pictures Phyllis posed for. Luckily they are abstract, so there is no way to tell it’s her. Probably could’ve told Amanda that so she wouldn’t have freaked the fuck out, Phyllis. They also see the art teacher who Phyllis went on a date with, and comment on how nasty he is, it’s pretty lol.

Back at home Amanda catches Phyllis reading her love letter to Danny and rightfully freaks out. Phyllis tries to say some garbage about how Amanda shouldn’t just focus on one boy which causes Amanda to say that unlike her mom, she likes just one dude at a time. Just as a fight is about to break out there’s a knock at the door. John’s back to fix some more shit and Phyllis uses it as an opportunity to basically throw herself at him. John decides he wants to hit that and asks Phyllis out. Amanda overhears, and being the cock block that she is, brings up the fact that Phyllis might have a date with Joc (art teacher) tonight, because Phyllis is a loose woman now. Phyllis gets pissed off at Amanda for trying to ruin her game and tells her to back off.

This leads Amanda into having some weird daydream about her mom posing nude for more artwork and getting John to stay and fix more appliances. The dream kinda blends into reality as she is calling her dad both in the dream and then in real life. Amanda starts bitching to Leonard about how much her mom’s behaviour is bothering her, but Leonard tells her that her mom isn’t really doing anything wrong and Amanda needs to shut up and accept it.

Amanda then starts looking at pictures of her broken family to a sad piano melody. It’s clear Amanda really blames her mom for what has happened, which is ironic considering what she later learns about her dad in season 4.

Later on in the eve, Busy has stopped by to hang out with Amanda. John stops in to pick up Phyllis for their night on the town, and Amanda has immediately become pretty cold with him. Hey he can’t help it if he knows Phyllis will probably give up the goods and therefore has to pursue that. Phyllis gets John some drinks, which annoys Amanda because her mom promised not to have men over, even though she’s seen John like 10,000 times by now. Amanda therefore stands around pouting while John and Phyllis awkwardly drink next to Busy.

While Phyllis is out, the girls decide to go snooping around her room. Amanda spills her perfume all over the place, and Busy pulls one of the grossest moves in the series by putting Phyllis’ diaphragm on her head.

Amanda freaks out and wonders why her mom still has that because she is clearly not banging Leonard anymore. She comes to the conclusion that it means she’ll be eventually be bumping uglies with John and/or many other men.

In order to stop this from occurring, Amanda decides to fake sick in order to get her mom to end her date early.

For some reason Amanda doesn’t even try to make her fake sick seem authentic aka somehow making her head hot and she even says no when her mom asks if she’s thrown up or had diarrhea. So of course Phyllis knows she lying and calls Amanda out on it. Amanda gets all pissy and stomps off saying she should just go live with her dad because he doesn’t throw himself at every woman he meets. Oh if only you knew Amanda/you will know Amanda in about two more seasons.

The next day Phyllis and Amanda kinda tensely avoid each other until Phyllis finally asks Amanda if she actually wants to live with her dad. Amanda keeps up the silent treatment until Phyllis asks her why the hell she’s so angry with her. Amanda admits she’s pissed because Leonard made it sound like they could get back together. Oh dads, always with the false hope. But Phyllis squashes that pipe dream and tells Amanda its basically done with him and she’s moving on up, to the east side, and so on and so forth.

Amanda tells her she wants her to be a mom for a bit because her people part has gotten a bit out of control. Phyllis agrees and they hug it out and make cookies. The end.

Jesus H Christ it took me forever to finish this review. I really could see a lot of myself in Amanda in this episode when I was a teenager, so it’s a bit cringeworthy. I personally think both of them were acting annoying in this episode, and like I said in previous entries, the Zimm family drama is boring to me.

Next episode is legit one I have absolutely no idea about. Most episodes I don’t like I have a vague recollection because I remember every episode of this show thanks to my freakish memory, but this one I don’t think I’ve seen since the show was on the air. I’m not looking forward to it, so the next review might take like three months. Just kidding….maybe.

Season 2, Episode 9: Dear Troy

Hi guys. Sorry this review took forever, I wake up at like 5:50am everyday now for work and it takes longer to write now. But it’s the long weekend and time to party, aka read some Ready or Not reviews!

Alright, time for some bullshit, more specifically, relationship bullshit involving Busy and Troy.

The episode opens with Troy and Busy watching what sounds like a soap opera based on the terrible dialogue, but I’m pretty sure it’s suppose to be a romantic movie. Troy’s lighting the candles and trying to set the scene to seduce Busy, while Busy sits there looking exceptionally uncomfortable.

We learn that Troy has seen this movie “four times” so it must have some sex scene in it that he hopes will put Busy in the mood.

Troy does the ol’ “yawn and arm” around Busy and starts getting fresh with her. He moves in for some heavy necking and Busy freaks out. I need to point out that another Ready or Not blog reviewer (if you can actually believe that another person reviewed this show) said this scene looked like an adult praying on a child and I can’t help but agree, especially since Busy’s wearing overalls and looks even younger than usual.

After escaping Troy’s clutches, Busy notices that he’s writing a poem. Troy grabs it because it’s for her, but it’s not ready yet. Troy also decides to start calling Busy by her real name, Elizabeth which weirds her out….because Busy is such a normal fucking nick name. Why isn’t she just called Liz like every other Elizabeth out there? Once again, Troy moves in for a smooch and Busy ducks away and grabs the basketball, like a true non-hetero girl. She throws the ball right into Troy’s gonads. Well, it’s not like he needs those as long as he’s dating Busy.

The next scene Amanda’s hanging out with Busy brother’s for some reason and doing some Cosmo quiz. She asks Frankie one of the questions about whether or not couples should share the work equally. Frankie being the modern man that he is says yes, while Manny being the Neanderthal that is he is, says no because he’s not a “quiche sucking wimp.” I have no idea what that even means.

Busy comes back and looks exceptionally boyish, like more so than half the dudes in this scene.

We learn that Manny has moved out, but came back home to get Lucy to do his laundry, despite the fact that he’s nearing 40 (in my opinion) and is capable of going to a laundry mat. I’m surprised Lucy actually did it.

Busy and Amanda step away from the Ramone clan and Amanda starts grilling Busy on details at Casa de Troy. Busy tells her about the Elizabeth thing, which naturally Amanda finds sweet and tells Busy she’s so lucky to have Troy around all the time. Busy invites her to stay for supper, but Amanda bails because Danny is flying back to New York tomorrow and she needs to get it in before he goes. I see she’s also back to embracing purple everything again in her wardrobe choices.

In the kitchen Sam is bitching about Manny coming over to eat their food and do his laundry and how he sucks as a bachelor. Mmmm pretty sure this is exactly what bachelors do. But Manny informs them that he is not actual a bachelor as he is currently shacking up with someone. Manny tells them about his girlfriend Shelia, who will eventually down the road become his wife. Sam is none too impressed by this arrangement, and tells Manny not to bring her around til she has a ring on her finger. I dunno why Sam consistently acts like he’s fresh off the boat, he’s lived in Canada for awhile, you’d think his old world Italian customs would change a bit.

The next day at school Amanda’s gushing about a candy necklace Danny got her before he took off for NYC. That seems like the type of cheap gift Danny would give someone, but of course Amanda thinks its extremely romantic. Amanda once again points out how lucky Busy is to have Troy, but we see Busy silently trying to cover up pictures of her and Troy with a basketball poster, so obviously her feelings for Troy are starting to falter. Troy comes up and asks Busy if they can talk in private and Amanda takes off.

Troy decides now is the time to take it to the next level and gives Busy a ring that was his dead mom’s. I dunno about anyone else, but if I had a kid that was giving away my dead spouses ring to some random girl in the eighth grade, I’d smack them. I’m sure that relationship is totally going to last and is worth giving away a family heirloom for. Troy tells Busy he wants to go steady and he won’t be playing the field anymore. You can tell Busy is silently freaking out, and tells Troy she can’t come to his place today because she’s rehearsing with Neon Vomit (wow I forgot those guys existed). So yeah, Busy is entirely not ready for what Troy is wanting, and not even on a sexual level, but a maturity level.

We’re now at Busy’s, and it’s clear she lied about the Neon Vomit thing because she’s hanging out with Amanda. They’re reading up on the meaning of a ring and how it symbolizes eternity.  Thus Busy thinks that means she’s Troy’s property or something stupid. She tells Amanda how much she hates that her and Troy can’t just hang out because he gets all lovey dovey and sometimes she just wants to be a tomboy. Amanda tells her to shut the fuck up because Danny’s gone and she wishes she had Busy’s problems. So both of them have the problems the other one wished they had.

The next day at school Troy see’s Busy but Busy rans off with Amanda before he can catch up with her. Busy is full on avoiding Troy now. Man up and dump his ass, Busy. The girls decide to visit Manny and his girlfriend at his new place.

Manny’s sitting around in a t-shirt that says “Just Do Me” while drinking beer, eating chips and watching TV. All he needs is one hand down his pants and he’d be the perfect Al Bundy replica.

“Shelia” comes in (quotation marks because whoever the actress is that is playing her is never seen again and a whole other Shelia arrives later on) and Manny starts acting like an annoying alpha male kissing up on her. Amanda asks Busy if that’s what Troy does, and Busy says “it’s what he tries to do.” Oh PLEASE. Troy is by far more feminine than anyone else on this show (except Amanda) and is all about the romance. Busy’s got a warped view on men thanks to the one’s in her family. Shelia quickly ducks out to change out of her work clothes.

When Shelia comes back, she’s unfortunately wearing a shirt owned by her ex boyfriend. Manny starts acting like a super jealous male chauvinist and tells her to go take it off. Shelia, despite being completely irritated, gives in and says sarcastically to Busy “men, you gotta keep them happy.” So clearly Busy is somehow going to associate her ape-like brother’s possessive behavior to Troy’s desire to just be more intimate with her.

So at home Busy decides to give Troy back the ring, because she doesn’t want to be owned by him or whatever. This kid is going to have some commitment issues in the future.

The next day after school Busy see’s Troy swinging sadly on the swing set. She goes over to him and he asks her why she didn’t have the guts to dump his ass and just gave him back the ring in an envelope. Busy tells Troy she doesn’t want to “break up break up” (even though she totally does) and Troy gets all happy and tries to take her somewhere to get fresh. Busy once again manages to escape Troy’s clutches by saying she’s walking Amanda home. So this whole situation is being prolonged because Busy is a wimp who can’t just break up with a guy she has no interest in at all anymore.

Later on at the gym, Busy is basically bitching to Amanda that she won’t be held down by a guy (guess a girl would be ok, right Busy? haha I kid…but not really) and all this other stuff making Troy sound like he treated her the way Manny treated Shelia. Amanda says she’s glad Busy told Troy the truth, but she obviously did not as she said none of that shit to Troy.

Later on, Troy comes up to Busy with some candy hearts and asks her if he can meet her tonight because he has something really special planned. Busy get’s all annoyed because she probably thinks Troy is planning on taking her V card and she’s rehearsing with Neon Vomit again. Troy asks her if she can just miss practice once for the surprise and Busy gets pissy because this clearly means Troy is trying to be controlling and says “maybe.” Troy leaves all disappointed.

Later on Busy’s practicing with Neon Vomit, and Troy comes by in one last desperate attempt to get her to come to his surprise. But as in her usual asshole fashion, Busy blows off Troy and says she can’t go. Troy finally realizes that Busy’s a terrible girlfriend and gives up. Should’ve went with Eve, Troy. Also off topic, but the Liz finally took out his white girl vacation braids, and it is magnificent.

The next day at school during the morning announcements over the PA, we hear that last night Troy won the national public library award for his poem “Elizabeth.” Busy realizes what a colossal fuck up she has committed.

In the washroom, Busy is sobbing to Amanda about how badly she treated Troy, but by this point I think the damage is clearly done and there’s no going back. Again, you done FUCKED UP BUSY.

Busy comes up to Troy in the hallway and congratulates him on the poem. Troy is giving her the major cold shoulder though. Busy wants to talk more to Troy, but some random kid named Gordon is hanging around, but Troy says it’s fine because “Gordon is his friend”. Wouldn’t most dudes feel totally awkward hanging around their buddy when he’s breaking up with his girlfriend? Take a hint, Gordon. Anyway, Busy finally tells Troy the truth, that the ring freaked her out and that she thought Troy was going to control her and they couldn’t be friends anymore. Troy’s over it though and is like bye Felicia and takes off.

As usual, Amanda’s hanging in the background while Busy is having a private moment happen between her and Troy. Amanda tells her she can go after Troy, but Busy say’s no because he obviously hates her guts now. Busy finally acknowledges that she’s a terrible friend and based on this season, I have to agree. I think Season 2 of this show should be dubbed “The Extensive Fuck Ups of Busy.”

Well that’s the end of Troy Edwards as a character. Overall I think he’s better off not being emotionally abused by members of the Ramone clan. I guess the girl’s just can’t have boyfriends at the same time. Too bad Troy and Amanda never fell for each other, because their corny asses would’ve totally gotten married by the end of the show or something. Oh well, better luck next time Troy.

Next episode is when I fully start to embrace my hatred of Phyllis, so look forward to that!

 

Season 2, Episode 8: Amanda’s Romance

‘Sup homies? Well this week has been a swell one for me, as my boyfriend bought a car, and thus I get free rides everywhere! My lazy ass is enjoying that, that’s for sure. But I’m as broke as a muthafucka right now, the ol’ job doesn’t really fully start til next week and thank GOD,  because I’m getting desperate. But anyway, let’s talk some Ready or Not!

The episode opens on a shot of some shitty apartment building. This is where Amanda and her mom will now reside, as a result of falling down the socioeconomic ladder thanks to the separation.

They are waiting for what seems like a decade for the elevators to arrive, and have a ton of painting supplies with them. Amanda reminisces on painting their old family home which results in Phyllis bringing up how Leonard was a jackass in that specific memory.

After waiting forever, they give up and walk up the stairs. As they climb, they happen to hear someone doing what sounds like the worst comedy routine ever, he even has a cassette player of people laughing. Does this kid not have a bedroom of his own to practice this crap in? I’m assuming his dad probably kicked him out, and after watching this episode, I really couldn’t blame him if he did.

Turns out, this kid is named Danny Masters. He is played by Ross Hull and if you ever grew up in Ontario/Canada in the 90s and watched television, you will immediately recognize him. He was in such Canadian classics as Are you Afraid of the Dark? ( Random fact: Laura Bertram was also in an episode and played another lame character named Amanda!) and Student Bodies. Nowadays Hull is a meteorologist for Global News Toronto.

So through Danny’s lackluster comedy we learn that like Amanda, he is also the product of a broken home. Danny’s family life is pretty fucked up, as his dad is currently living in Toronto, but Danny’s actually from New York, where he lives with his mom. So his parents have frequent custody battles and he’s forced to go back and forth between the cities. It’s also necessary to point out that Danny has the weirdest hair, it’s somehow naturally crimped or something. Either way, it’s not normal, much like Danny.

Later on, Amanda and Phyllis are painting and discussing Danny and how awful his hair is. The phone rings and somehow despite the fact that they literally just moved in, Danny has found their number and is calling them. Stalker much? He actually calls and asks if he can borrow a cup of sugar, like what decade does this kid currently live in? Why did he need to call about that, I’m sure the time it took to locate their number back in the 90s would’ve taken longer than just going upstairs. Yes I am analyzing this too much, but if I didn’t than who would??

Amanda brings the sugar down to Danny and he gives her a tour of his dad’s hoarder-like apartment. They start chatting and Amanda tells him that her parents recently separated too, so now these two have something to bond over. Danny starts projecting his weird shit onto Amanda by comparing his parents custody battle to a game of ping-pong and he’s the ball. I guess you can’t really blame him, because his situation is pretty awful. But I can already tell Amanda’s feeling bad for him which = starting to like him.

The next day Amanda’s looking for a shoe, which somehow prompts her to open her front door (no idea, did she think she left the shoe in the hall?) There she finds a cup of sugar with a flower in it, so we all know now that she’s definitely going to be smitten for Danny, as this is the first boy whose ever actually acknowledged her.

At school Amanda’s in the can, and Busy comes in telling her that some “goof” is handing out business cards in the hallway. Two guesses who this could possibly be. Amanda’s plucking her eyebrows trying to get herself hot for Danny, and Busy quickly seems to realize that Danny is indeed the “goof”.

So in the school hall, Danny’s already going around acting like a complete dumbass. He decides it would be normal to drop his pants in front of Chrissy and bare his underwear to the school. Even Monkey Ears thinks he’s an idiot.

In class, Amanda see’s Danny come in and kicks Busy out from where she was sitting so Danny can sit next to her. The teacher then brings up some weird scenario asking the class what they would bring with them if they were ever on a deserted island together. Amanda then has some horrifying fantasy image of Danny in an open shirt, doing some weird rapist gaze while holding a huge sunflower.

The teacher asks Amanda what she would bring and she says “just Danny.” How mortifying! She quickly says boots, and then Danny says he’d bring a two year supply of breath mints. Gross.

At lunch Amanda is telling Busy how romantic she thinks it was that Danny said breath mints, because that implies that he wants to kiss her for two years. See I knew Amanda was going to turn Danny being a fucking weirdo into something romantic. Danny comes in the cafe, still acting like a moron. Busy peaces out to give Amanda time alone with Danny/I think she just didn’t want to hang around him.

Danny stares at Chrissy in the background and Amanda notes that every guy in the school wants to bang her. Danny says he doesn’t because she’s trying too hard to be sexy and he feels bad for her because it’s pathetic. Oh please, that’s why you dropped your pants in front of her in a stupid attempt to impress her? I see through all your bullshit, Danny. But Amanda doesn’t and gets all smiley because Danny insulted her arch nemesis.

Later on, Amanda’s practicing for the 70s dance the school is having. Yeah, forgot to mention that…the school is having a 70s dance. So Phyllis and Amanda are dancing to the most generic sounding “disco” ever. I really love whoever has to come up with all the fake music for this show. So their practicing the hussle or whatever, Danny arrives and basically calls them fatasses aka elephants because he can hear them from downstairs in his apartment.

Amanda’s dad ruins the fun by phoning and pissing Phyllis off. Amanda runs out and Danny follows after her. Danny comes out and tells her that the fighting will get worse during holidays/her birthday. I think this guy just gets off on parental strife, he always seems a bit too eager to go on and on about parents fighting. But anyway, Danny uses this as an opportunity to ask Amanda out to a movie and the dance.

For some reason Amanda decides to do a double date with Busy and Troy, despite the fact that it is clear that Busy is not a fan of Danny. They end up going to some emotional movie, because Troy starts blubbering like a baby. Danny is also one of those obnoxious fuckers that decides his opinion about the movie is worth shouting out. He also makes fun of Troy for crying. Troy and Busy get super pissed at Danny being a jerk and take off.

Amanda and Danny leave the movies, and you can tell Amanda’s embarrassed/totally annoyed with how Danny acted. Danny starts bullshitting, saying that his comedy is huge in New York City and how he’ll get to perform one day. Ok, how old are you Danny? Are you even allowed in a club at 13? Amanda’s still giving him the silent treatment, and Danny tries to say that people don’t understand him the way she does. No, Amanda’s just too nice and puts up with stupidity much more than most would. Ok, I also need to point out that Danny’s fashion sense is truly bizarre. He’s either wearing dad bowling league t-shirts or grandfather cardigans. If this was airing nowadays, Danny would definitely be a model hipster.

Next day at school Busy and Amanda have a two second conversation where Amanda tries to defend Danny by using the “product of broken homes” excuse and Busy says that gives him no right to be an asshole to people. Exactly right, Busy.

While walking in the dance Amanda tries to explain to Danny that he should apologize to Busy and Troy because his crappy sense of humour is actually hurtful to some people. Danny gets totally offended by Amanda trying to analyze his behaviour and takes off into the gym alone. Yeah, so this jerk can insult everyone, but the second someone tries to offer constructive criticism he runs off. I hate people like that, can dish it out but can’t take it.

WTF the DJ is playing the EXACT same song Phyllis and Amanda were dancing to in the apartment. This “woooo woooo woooo wooo…WAAAAAAAHAAY” song must’ve been on par with “Disco Inferno” in this television universe. Seriously, all the song is saying is woooo woooo woooooo wooo and then WAAAHAAAAAAAAAY, they couldn’t come up with ANYTHING ELSE? Even the fake U2 song had lyrics.

Amanda goes in and see’s Danny dancing like a muppet around Chrissy. For someone he claims is “pathetic”, Danny sure spends a lot of time trying to get Chrissy’s attention.

Busy notices that Amanda looks bummed out because Danny is being a dick and starts making her dance along with her and Troy.

Danny notices that Amanda’s not paying attention to him anymore and dances over and calls Amanda an elephant again. Amanda gets upset and runs off. Finally, Busy takes it upon herself to do what should’ve been done at the beginning of this episode and tells Danny to shut the fuck up because he’s not funny.

Busy chases Amanda into the bathroom and tells her that she shouldn’t let Danny ruin her night because he’s a moron. Danny overhears because he’s taken upon himself to go into the washroom and eavesdrop. There’s some girls doing make-up and they start laughing at this spectacle and Danny tells everyone to get out because he and Amanda need privacy. Uh.. YOU get out Danny, you’re in the girl’s washroom!

Everyone leaves, including Busy. Instead of apologizing for his behaviour, Danny starts telling more stupid jokes. Amanda is over it and goes to leave and Danny tries to say “it’s the way he is and he’s had a hard life.” Amanda calls him on his bullshit, because her life has been shitty lately too and she doesn’t go around being a jerk to people because of it. He then tries the whole “woe is me, why are you still my friend?” angle and she’s still like give me a break. He FINALLY starts telling the truth and admits that his comedy was a bomb in NYC and he got heckled off the stage. Amanda then says “I knew it”. HAHA BURN.

Anyway, it ends up with Amanda deciding to forgive Danny if he apologizes to Busy and Troy. They then decide the girl’s washroom is the perfect spot for their first kiss. But they get interrupted, first by two girls coming into the washroom and then by some girl who was in a stall THE WHOLE TIME coming out. Must’ve been a damn big shit she was taking.

Finally the two lovebirds get a chance to kith.

So despite the fact that Danny is pretty annoying, I really liked this episode a lot. It was nice to finally see Amanda like a guy and have him like her back. Danny as a character is kinda random, because he’s never around that much from here on out (I think he’s seen randomly in 5 or 6 episodes). I wish they emphasized Amanda’s relationships with guys more than Busy’s…but I guess they probably would’ve had to do a sex episode or something, because we all know Busy would never do anything with a dude and Amanda totally would. Speaking of Busy and relationships, next episode we will see her’s rocked to the core! The core I say!

Until next time!

 

 

 

Season 2, Episode 7: Break Up

Hey guys, guess what, I got a job! I’m going back to my barista roots, working at a new cafe opening soon in a city next to mine. I’m really excited, as having no money sucks and the people I’m working for seem really cool.

Well we’ve now come to the episode where the Zimm’s reach the cusp of their downward spiral and it results in Amanda doing some fucking weird shit. But I’m getting ahead of myself, let’s start from the beginning.

The episode opens with Amanda painting some huge mural and you can hear Phyllis and Leonard arguing in the background. You hear Leonard yell “Goddamnit, that’s it!” and leaves the house. Amanda looks sullenly into her paints as she knows her family is on the brink of separation.

The next day Busy and Amanda are walking around the mall and Busy actually notices some hot guys that Amanda didn’t, so you know something’s wrong with Amanda. Busy asks her what’s up and Amanda starts talking about some weird childhood fantasy she had about living in a mall. Busy naturally scoffs at this, while Amanda points out that you could fully live well enough in a mall aka by eating the cafeteria food, playing with the toys etc. Hey, it worked in Dawn of the Dead until the zombies tore everyone’s shit up.

They walk into what is probably Sears or The Bay and find an extravagant bed, which Amanda immediately wants and refers to as “an environment.” Busy asks if she could ask her parents for it and Amanda says no because her dad is still an unemployed bum, plus having the marital strife. Amanda asks Busy how her parents are doing and Busy acts kinda weird about it, but says they are doing fine. Then she see’s some kid playing a Sonic the Hedgehog game and immediately runs off to play it. It’s scenes like this where Busy seems like such a little effing child compared to Amanda.

Amanda comes home and her parents are sitting on the couch in a serious manner, so you know Leonard’s getting his ass kicked to the curb. Amanda asks how long til he goes and he says he’s leaving tomorrow. Also Phyllis is wearing the worst jeans in existence in this scene; they weirdly bunch at the ankle, perhaps because of spandex and they’re that gross light blue colour that was big in the early-mid 90’s. They just look awful, it was all I could focus on in this scene.

The next day Busy is at Amanda’s place and you can tell she feels super awkward because Amanda’s trying to put on a brave face with her father leaving, but isn’t really succeeding. She keeps lying to herself saying that things will go back to normal once her dad finds a job and all that other crap kids tell themselves when their parents break up. Leonard comes in and again it becomes awkward because he’s leaving and Busy’s there which doesn’t really allow him to have a heartfelt goodbye with Amanda. He goes and then Busy can’t handle the awkwardness and leaves as well. Amanda cries softly into her yellow paint.

Amanda goes downstairs and notices Leonard took all the furniture. Pretty shitty move I’d say, but then I guess he’s broke and most likely paid for it so felt right in taking it. Just seems a bit fucked to me that he’d leave them without a damn chair. Amanda starts giving attitude to Phyllis, saying shit like “are you satisfied now?” even though they both agreed to separate. I think in the eyes of a kid, whichever parent is the one that has to go will always look like the “better person” even if they aren’t (which is the case with Leonard, and not even just cuz of his lack of job, it will be revealed in later episodes the other bullshit he did).

Phyllis tries to tell Amanda right now it’s complicated, but she doesn’t make herself look any good when she says shit about Leonard only “loafing around” when he was there. Amanda gets really pissed at that and yells at her mom saying she was too mean to Leonard and always yelled at him. Phyllis starts getting emotional and Amanda yells “Why are you crying, you’re the one that made him go!” and runs off. I found this an extremely accurate portrayal of how a kid would react in this situation, blaming the one parent, getting in one good hurtful jab before running off etc.

At Leonard’s Amanda’s having a spaghetti dinner with her dad. What is it about spaghetti dinners with recently separated fathers? It’s always either that or Kraft dinner. Least they’re not having pancakes for dinner like in the Babysitter’s Club movie. So Leonard is trying to make the best of the situation saying shit to Amanda like “now we can get to know each other as people” to which she replies yeah we can do that at home and have an unbroken family. Just like Phyllis, he tells her it’s not that simple blah blah.

Amanda starts looking at some newspapers and tells Leonard he needs to get a goddamn job so things can go back to normal, but of course it’s more than that because clearly Phyllis and Leonard hate each other now. Amanda then gets all mopey because Leonard took one half of the couch section and it clearly symbolizes the breaking up of the family unit all set to the heartfelt piano this show loves. Oh Ready or Not, you’re so melodramatic.

The next day Busy and Amanda are walking home and Busy asks how Amanda’s dad’s place is and if it’s a “swinging bachelor pad”. Of course Amanda gets pissed off at this remark and says her dad isn’t a bachelor and that his apartment is depressing as fuck. Stupid Busy. Amanda then asks if Busy wants to come over and study and Busy once again lies in a terrible fashion and says she has to go help her mom make dinner. So clearly Busy is totally weirded out by Amanda’s family shit, probably because it hits a bit too close to home with her own family.

Later on at her house, Amanda hear’s Phyllis and Leonard arguing about money over the phone. She picks up the receiver and yells at both of them to shut the fuck up and then runs out of the house in a dramatic fashion.

Amanda goes to Busy’s where she’s in the middle of a poker game with her brothers. Amanda wants Busy to go to the mall with her, but Busy’s being really dismissive about it, clearly rather hanging out with her bros. Sam and Lucy come in with a huge pizza and it’s just one of those perfect family moments where everyone is happy and content. Amanda decides to go and Busy is basically like “ok PAYCE” aka doesn’t care at all. Lucy kinda notices since Lucy is the only one who seems to be aware of people outside herself. Anyway, so yeah Busy’s being a shit friend in this episode. Actually Busy’s been pretty shitty this entire season now that I’m really paying attention to these episodes. I am by no means a huge fan of Amanda, but Busy’s been pretty craptacular lately.

Amanda goes to the mall by herself. She starts writing in her diary which actually looks like a napkin, and she’s writing with one of those thin Crayola markers. She then notices some gross dude’s checking her out and high tails it out of the cafeteria. That one guy legit looks like he’s rolling a joint haha.

Amanda wanders aimlessly around the mall. She then comes back to that bed her and Busy were at before, right as an announcement comes on the PA saying the mall is closing soon. She then decides to hide under the bed and live out her fantasy of residency in a mall.

We then see a montage of Amanda doing random shit in the mall such as trying on make-up, trying on clothes, playing video games, going to the food court and other various things. She finally wanders off and settles into the bed.

Back at the Ramone’s Lucy is asking Busy if anything is going on between her and Amanda, probably on account of how lame Busy was treating her earlier. Busy says no and Lucy tells her she knows about her parents splitting up and asks Busy if she’s scared to talk about it because of her and Sam’s issues. Busy says yeah and that’s basically why she’s ignoring Amanda. Lucy tells her to remember Amanda has no siblings so maybe try and actually talk with her. This is why I love Lucy, she just seems to care about everyone. So Phyllis calls and she’s probably freaking out because Amanda’s missing and you can tell by Busy’s face that she probably has an inkling where crazy Amanda went.

Finally just when you think this mall has no security whatsoever, a security guard catches Amanda in the bed and drags her ass off the office to call the police/her parents. As this is occurring, Lucy and Busy are pulling up to the mall’s parking lot. Lucy asks Busy why she thinks she’s here and Busy says “because she’s Amanda.” I think this reasoning will be used again later on in this series.

The security guard starts writing her up and Amanda tries to reason with him saying she only did it because of her family strife. He doesn’t seem to really care, but conveniently just as this convo is occurring they see the Ramone meat van on the security camera. Amanda begs him not to call the cops and he gives in pretty easily, probably didn’t want to deal with all the bullshit.

Back at Amanda’s place her parents give her the whole spiel about being worried and asks why she ran away. Amanda says she doesn’t know and she just wants them to get back together, which they say nope, not happening. The episode ends with Amanda quietly going up to her room and laying in a fetal position over the soft piano.

Overall this episode was much more boring than I remembered it being. For some reason I thought the mall antics lasted way longer, but they were about 10% of this episode. I guess I also find Amanda’s family drama much less interesting than Busy’s family drama.. Most likely because I don’t like the Zimm family all that much in general. Busy continues to irritate me as a character this season, but thankfully(?) we are introduced to a much more annoying character in the next episode. So look forward to that!

 

 

 

Season 2, Episode 6: White Girls Can’t Jump

Hi guys, sorry this review is so late, life hasn’t been the best lately. One of my pets is really sick, so that’s been on my mind. In addition to that, my laptop has now broken for a third time, and I’m currently using my boyfriend’s machine. Plus I’m still unemployed. So I’m kinda over life as of late. But I find Ready or Not to be a welcoming distraction, though this episode I’m reviewing now is pretty annoying. Ah well, on with the show.

The episode opens with the Ramone’s watching a basketball game on TV. Sam’s reverting to his usual casual racism, except this time he has something “good” to say, in remarking that all black’s are naturally good athletes. Frankie tell him that’s a stupid stereotype, but Sam tries to defend it saying there is nothing wrong with being naturally gifted. Yep, it’s all because of their skin colour, Sam.

Dom comes in looking for an “Italian Stallion” shirt which no one has. Busy is sitting around with a basketball and Dom asks what she’s doing, and she replies that she’s trying out for the basketball team. Manny says she’ll make it because she’s Italian, and thus “good at sports” but Dom says there’s never been any Italians good at basketball which Busy intends to change. So yep, ANOTHER RACISM EPISODE… *insert annoyed sigh here*

The next day Busy’s practicing basketball in the snow with Troy. She asks Troy if he wants to practice with her and he says no cuz he sucks and hates basketball. See Sam, not EVERY black person is good at basketball…which is the message this episode is already trying to hammer into our heads.

The next scene is in a science class. Mr Boil appears to be the teacher, but I thought he taught music? Or maybe it’s a different teacher but the same actor, I honestly wouldn’t put it past this show to make the same actor play two random people because it’s been done before. Anyway, so maybe-Boil is talking about DNA and Troy is not getting it, and is trying to figure out what the deal is with this weird DNA model thing everyone has. This random girl sitting beside Troy decides to help him out by twisting this model DNA for him and then schooling him on the functions of deoxyribonucleic acid.

Turns out this girl’s name is Eve and she’s one smart cookie when it comes to science, unlike Troy who appears to have almost failed the test when Boil hands back the papers. Pretty sure I saw a “D” grade written down. Eve seems pretty smitten with Troy though, as she gazes at him with sympathy for sucking so hard at science.

The next scene Busy and Amanda are at their lockers and Busy is stressing out about the basketball tryouts, especially since its the senior basketball team and she’s the only grade 7 trying out for the team. Somehow Dom’s stupid Italian Stallion t-shirt got into Busy’s gym bag and she’s hoping it’ll bring her luck. Amanda notices that Troy is talking with Eve and asks Busy who she is. Busy says its Troy’s pretty, smart, athletic science partner, and Amanda tells her to calm down because Troy is crazy about her.

Troy and Eve are talking about science and how Troy’s basically fucked if he doesn’t pass biology. Eve offers to tutor him because she wants to bang him and tells him to come by her place on Friday. Troy says he can’t cuz he has plans with Busy who happens to come up right at that moment. Eve has a UBW (unimpressed black woman) expression on her face and walks off. Busy remarks to Troy how pretty she is and Troy says “not as pretty as you.” Oh Troy…love is blind.

Next scene is a short one outside with Eve and her friend having a discussion about the relationship status of Troy and Busy. Eve wonders what Troy see’s in her and thinks its weird that they are dating since Troy’s in grade 8 and Busy’s only in grade 7. Her friend rightly points out that Eve is jealous, to which she says she’s not and is just pissed that all the guys she likes are taken. I dunno, I can’t see Cornelius middle school being a hot bed of male hotties, but who knows.

We now turn to the basketball tryouts, and it basically shows that both Eve and Busy are good at the sport. It’s a two second scene.

The results of the tryouts are up, and Troy and Amanda go check it out for Busy and sure enough she made it. Then for some reason she feels compelled to say “obviously you don’t have to be black to be good at sports.” Amanda and Troy give her a major WTF look at that dumbass remark, and Busy then blames Sam for saying it. Luckily Troy breaks the awkwardness by once again pointing out how much he sucks at sports. Amanda takes off and Busy asks Troy if he wants to go celebrate by getting a pizza, but Eve comes sauntering up all ready to “tutor” Troy.

The next day Busy is having one of her once-a-season-I’m-trying-to-be-a-female moments and has borrowed some purple girly clothes from Amanda. She hopes Troy will notice, because I guess now she feels threatened by Eve, even though Eve is also athletic and not really a girly girl at all. Troy goes to his locker and barely notices Busy. Though I have to admit, those clothes do look way better than what she normally wears.

Later on in the gym the girl’s basketball team is practicing and Eve notices Troy with his camera. She runs over and returns a notebook he forgot at her place with all his poems and whatnot. She makes a joke about love letters and then says Troy’s “cute when he’s embarrassed.” So yeah, Eve is definitely macking on some Troy. Busy and Amanda come in and Amanda notices that Eve really enjoys herself some Troy. Busy says she hopes the feeling isn’t mutual and Amanda asks why would it be. Busy then says she thinks it would make more sense because they’re both black. I really don’t get Busy’s though process, seeing as how she’s in an interracial relationship with Troy. Would she automatically dump him if she met some corny Italian guy that liked poems and photography just because he would be Italian?

Eve see’s Busy and Troy hugging and is none too happy about their relationship.

So it shifts to the basketball court and a practice game is going on. Eve is being an asshole on the court and not passing to Busy, instead only passing to her black friend (I don’t think it really matters to point out she’s black, but at the same time it might, so I will). When she finally does pass it to Busy it’s when she’s not ready at all and she ends up hitting Busy in the side of her head. So anger is beginning to build up between these two.

Finally the racist blowout is about to occur. In the hallway Busy confronts Eve on why she’s being a jerk on the court. Eve tells her she isn’t being a team player and Busy rebuttals by saying she doesn’t think Eve can stand to see her do well. Eve basically laughs it off and goes to leave, but Busy ain’t through. She asks Eve if she’s worried she thinks Busy may be better and then Eve says “you’ll never be better than me.” Busy then decides to say “just because I’m not black, doesn’t mean I’m not good.” Oh God.

Eve is like hell fucking no, and says, “that’s what this is about, me being black?” Busy says no, and then Eve says “sure sounds like it, wop.” So YEAH, they’re both racist idiots! The fight ends with some more stereotypes like Eve saying Busy should “stick with her own kind” and that it’s “good that she hasn’t shaved her legs yet, because Italian men like women nice and hairy.” I thought that was French men? Busy then tells Eve she heard black men like their women “nice and lazy so they can hang out on the corner and cause trouble” and then stomps off. So yeah….that happened. Also I dunno why, but Busy’s sassy little hand on the hip amuses me.

The next day at school Amanda and Busy walk up to Busy’s locker and “Racist” is written in bold black marker. Troy walks by and Busy’s like “do you see this shit??” But Troy ain’t having it, because he heard what Busy said to Eve about black people. Busy tries to say that Eve also said horrible things to her, but Troy blows it off. So obviously Troy isn’t hearing the full story because Eve also said racist shit. Amanda’s like “wtf did you actually say that?” and they run off to the washroom to discuss.

They go into the washroom where Busy tells Amanda what Eve said, but Amanda’s still like why did you say what you did? Busy tries to blame it on hearing her dad say that and it just popped into her head. But Amanda’s basically still like, that doesn’t mean you say it, dumbass.

The next scene is another short one at the Ramone’s with just Dom and Busy. Busy asks Dom if people inherit bad qualities and Dom says some stupid joke about her being worried about getting a mustache like their Nonna. Busy says forget it and that she hopes Dom won’t be a racist like their dad. So yeah, I guess this is weirdly tying into the whole DNA thing, and nature vs nurture with stuff like racism. I dunno, moving on.

Later on at school, Amanda and Eve are sitting in the stairwell eating lunch and Eve comes up with her posse and tells Busy that no one wants her on the team anymore because she’s a racist. Amanda points out that Eve is just as much of a racist as Busy is. Also Eve is dressed like a school teacher for some reason, you can’t see it in the screenshot, but in addition to this beige blazer, she’s also wearing some horrid brown slacks.

Later on at Busy’s place, Amanda and her have a discussion about how Busy is worried that she may be a born racist because of her family. Amanda asks her about when she fights with Troy what the reasons are, and Busy says because he makes her do lame thing she doesn’t like and Amanda points out that it’s not because he’s black. Busy also notes that Eve pisses her off not because she’s black but because of how she acts on the court and Amanda adds because she’s trying to steal Troy. So in conclusion, Busy isn’t a racist, but kind of an idiot who needs to think before she speaks.

Back at school the girl’s basketball team is now finally playing an actual game. Amanda sits next to Troy and you can tell he’s still hurt by Busy’s dumb remarks, but Amanda says lighten up on Biz cuz Eve said some dumb shit too. Busy walks proud into the court, despite being pretty much hated by the team, or so Eve would have you believe. Eve’s pretty flabbergasted that Busy would have the balls to show up.

During the game both Eve and Busy aren’t passing to one another and it’s costing the team points because they keep trying to make impossible shots on their own. The coach calls a time out and Eve starts going on about Busy hating all black people because she accidentally knocked Eve down on the court. The coach tells them both to fuck off and win the damn game and solve their shit off the court later.

So finally after that they start playing normal and Eve gives in and passes the ball to Busy, allowing them to win the game with seconds to spare.

Everyone’s cheering and Busy is seen chumming up with some black chick that’s never been seen before. I guess this was to establish that Busy doesn’t hate black people? It was awkward.

So yeah, Eve can’t let it go though and she comes up to Busy and tells her again that no one wants her racist ass on the team.

Busy tells her to knock it off because she also said racist things that they both said in anger. Eve says its different because she’s black and Busy is white, but both Troy and Eve’s black friend are like “uhhhh how is it different?” P.S. It is totally different, just look at history. Troy says either way, that doesn’t mean they should be racist back. Finally Busy says the reason she was also annoyed at Eve was because she thought she was going after Troy and that he may like her because they’re both black. Troy then says he likes Busy for lots of reasons, and not one is because of her transparent, albino skin. Everyone lowers their head in shame because Troy is the only one here who isn’t an asshole.

Later on Eve is playing basketball alone in a dark gym, and then Busy also feels like playing basketball alone in a dark gym and comes in. They kinda acknowledge each other and then finally end up playing 21 together.

I found this episode pretty obnoxious. I dunno what the point of this was other than to show that black people can be racist too? Don’t assume things based on race? Who knows.

Anyway, I think we’re finally done with the racist episodes, thank God. Busy also kinda sucks this season…first the dance-a-thon wimp out, then the U4EA ticket scandal…now racism. Shape up, Busy. Next episode is pretty funny so I’m looking forward to that. Until then!

Season 1, Episode 2: No Worries

Hello again friends. Last we left off, we met about 250 kids who live in Edgemont and all have issues of which I have varying levels of caring about. Arguably the most important one being a minor is missing, and that’s how we ended off the premiere of Edgemont!. So let us continue on, with hopes that maybe this episode we will be able to devote a bit more time to specific people and problems and not have everyone crammed in at once.

The episode opens with Mark having returned home after looking for Travis all night around the neighbourhood. Kat is freaking out, thinking that their brother could’ve gotten on a Greyhound to God knows where. Apparently their mom still doesn’t even know he’s missing, with Kat being pissed she left for work as if nothing was wrong. Well why aren’t you telling her her child is missing?? Like I get it, they think the parents can’t handle it. But like these teenagers can? Anyway, it’s an extremely short scene, then we get into the catchy theme song immediately.

After the opening credits, we see a guy at the coffee shop with his head down looking like he is asleep. I thought it was Mark at first, given the whole overnight search, but no, it’s Gil, and we’re still on that stupid essay plot from the first episode. Chris comes by and is happy to see Gil completed the task and ends up taking the essay Gil did for himself because that one would likely be better. Then Gil spills coffee on his essay like a dumbass.

We then go to Mark and Kat at the school with Mark telling his sister if Travis isn’t found by noon they’ll call the police. Kat asks why he’s even in the school because he’s suspended, which he somehow forgot, but I guess he’s got shit on his mind. Kat takes off, then Scott rounds the bend to bug Mark about being in love and not being able to talk to Laurel properly. Holy shit, this character is by far the most annoying one so far. His whole thing so far has been awkward weirdo who doesn’t have social skills. Mark tells him to just be himself and leaves, with Scott being like, well who am I? At least he’s aware his character has zero personality.

In the washroom, Anika and Erin are talking, with Anika bitching she didn’t get as high a mark as Erin on a test, even though she copied Erin. Erin says her pea brain answers were the wrong ones, which somehow Anika blames her for as well. Laurel comes in, and Anika acts fake nice to her, informing Erin once Laurel is out of earshot that she’s going to regret moving to Edgemont by the end of the day.

We then see Erin telling a bunch of girls that Laurel did something so bad “she can’t even show her face in Toronto anymore.” Listen, we had a crack smoking mayor, there’s very little that shocks Torontonians, so unless Laurel committed a terrorist attack and is on the run, I doubt anything she could have done would matter at all.

Laurel then see’s a bunch of the girls that Erin was talking to, looking at her and saying shit, so she can tell something is going on. Scott comes by, and actually makes a semi-decent attempt to talk to Laurel, asking her if she wants to study for some test that’s on Friday. Laurel is so preoccupied with rumours starting and probably sick of being followed (by Scott), she barely acknowledges him and walks off.

In the halls, we see Jen has now met up with Mark, whose telling her the news that the principle has dropped the suspension to detentions because of Mark’s broken home situation. Mark then asks Jen for a quarter, who asks, “for what?” Which maybe nowadays to the youngins who never encountered a payphone this would be a weird request, but he’s clearly asking her for it to use the phone. I am kinda surprised he doesn’t have a cell, but I sincerely cannot remember when I got my first cell phone, so maybe 2000 was just before it started becoming a thing. Mark tells her the Travis thing, and her response is normal in being like wtf why haven’t your parents done that, with Mark confirming he hasn’t told them yet. Ugh, stupid teenagers, stop trying to handle things that are way outside of your capacities.

Mark calls the cops, who seem to not really give a shit given how the phone call ends. Scott, of course lurking in the shadows, comes out and yet again bugs Mark to help him with Laurel, whose sitting on the floor on her laptop. How Mark hasn’t told this guy to go the fuck away yet, I have no clue. Mark finally gives in, as clearly Scott is not going to be satisfied until Laurel is chained in his basement, and goes to try and help him out with her.

So Mark tries to give Scott an opening to talk to Laurel, and starts talking about the SkyDome (which it will always be known as, screw The Rogers Centre), but instead Scott decides to continue having stupid daydreams about Laurel. But while Scott continues to make an idiot of himself, Laurel and Mark kind of seem to hit it off a bit. But considering Mark actually knows how to have a conversation, I’d say the bar is pretty low.

We then cut to an extremely short scene of Craig at the coffee shop with Maggie, and he’s talking about goddamn Communism again. Actually he’s decided he’s now an Anarchist. Maggie slightly humours him, while gently touching his hands, which you know made him pop a chub. But anyway, we don’t need to go into that. Also this scene was not needed and pointless, because this is the only time we see Craig this whole episode.

Back to the main story line; Mark meets up with Kat to call the police (which he already did), and Kat is on the cusp of a mental breakdown because of Travis. Jen comes up running and tells the siblings to come with her. We then cut to her garage, and we see this kid, I’m assuming Travis, sleeping in the backseat of a car.

Kat is about ready to snap this kid’s neck, but Mark tells her to calm down and tells Travis to come on home with them. And that literally seems to be the end of that plot point. Also entirely offtopic, but these siblings don’t look related to each other at all and it bothers me.

At the coffee shop, Gil is still there, drinking coffee and whining about writing the two essays. I thought teenagers were able to stay up all night with ease. I remember doing stuff like that. Erin and Anika come in, and Anika starts asking Gil what’s his issue. Gil says he’s pissed at the teacher and Chris regarding the whole situation. Anika tells him to watch himself, as Chris is a psychopath (I don’t know why this is a thing with her, as so far Chris seems fairly normal). Gil responds that he’d kick Chris’ “black ass”. The girls are just like ooooooooooooookay…..

….And immediately go tell Chris exactly what Gil said, lmaaaaaaao. The girl’s of course come up with a bullshit excuse to be telling him, but Chris knows they just want to cause chaos. He’s pissed either way, and probably goes off to decapitate Gil.

At Mark’s place, he gives Travis the quintessential Canadian dinner, i.e. Kraft dinner and asks him where he went. Travis tells him he was basically just hanging around, and asks how their mom took his disappearance. Mark tells him they never told the mom, and Travis gets mad and runs off. So clearly he did it to get the parents to notice him. Ah classic pre-teen move for attention, pretending to run away.

The next day at school, Jen is basically saying the exact same thing to Mark, in that Travis was acting out to get his parents attention, and that Kat and Mark were stupid not to say anything to the parents. But enough about Travis, because Mark and Jen’s six month anniversary is coming up on Friday, and Jen wants to make it super special. Which we all know what that means on teen shows. Better go buy some prophylactics, Mark.

After Jen fucks off, Mark is walking down the hall and Laurel stops him and asks what the hell is wrong with Scott, i.e. does he have a keeper, and why isn’t he being handled properly? Mark subtly lets her know that he basically has a crush on her and that’s why he can’t act like a normal person. Laurel then lets him know that it’s not happening, and advises him to tell Scott that, lest she has to obtain a restraining order. Laurel leaves, and Anika asks Mark if he’s gotten the word on her.

Which leads to another scene of Laurel being confronted by Erin and some random girls stating the reason Laurel left Toronto was because she was pregnant. This is very stupid, but realistic high school drama, unlike shows like Degrassi: The Next Generation, where Laurel would’ve had to leave Toronto because she was a former teen stripper (actual plot of an episode, minus leaving Toronto).

Erin and her girl group leave, and Anika pops by to offer fake sympathy to Laurel, who see’s through it and calls her one sick puppy for starting this messed up rumour. Anika gives two shits, and tells Laurel that she’s pretty much done at this school reputation wise, and Laurel should catch the next flight back to The Six.

Cut to a new scene, and Gil is walking along, when Chris approaches all happy that he got a B+ on the essay he wrote for him. However, the love is short lived, as Chris tells Gil he heard from Anika that Gil planned on beating his “black ass” and he responds by literally crushing Gil’s balls with his vice-like grip. So yeah, not exactly helping Chris’ psycho reputation, but Gil had it coming. #questionablescreenshots

In the cafe, a short scene of Mark breaking the news to Scott that it’s a hard no from Laurel. He’s sad. Moving on.

At Mark’s, Travis is watching TV while Kat is freaking out looking for a remote, but in the background you can hear their parents fighting. Travis says they’ll likely end up in some dump apartment because their parents are going to break up and ruin their sweet Edgemont house situation. Kat says it’s unlikely and that they are just having a domestic, but no one is splitting up. Also, off topic, but Travis feels like such a 90’s name to me. Does anyone name their kid Travis anymore?

Back at the coffee shop, a postpartum Laurel enters, and Mark comes up to her asking how it’s going. She says obviously shitty, as Kool-aid head Anika and her minion have spread rumours that she was knocked up. Mark scoffs and says it’s obviously not true, is it? She’s like d’uh.

Mark invites her to sit down and asks how this all started. Laurel says Anika, but she’s not sure what her damage is. Mark says it’s probably because Laurel is hotter than her, and says she shouldn’t worry about Anika because basically no one takes her seriously. Laurel seems to give into that logic pretty quickly and is over it. Mark then asks her about Toronto, if she has a boyfriend (which Laurel keeps quiet about), if she’s had sex in a public place. She jokingly says yes and Mark’s like :O but then they start laughing. So obvi we can see there is definitely some chemistry between these two.

Oh and Erin see’s it too, complete with her pen from the movie Clueless.

Mark goes home and Kat’s all pissy because she thinks Mark is cheating on Jen with Laurel based on I guess either an IM or an email Laurel sent him, thanking him for cheering her up after her crappy day. Either way, why’s Kat reading his shit? Mark’s like yeah nothing happened, so mind ya damn business.

The episode ends with Anika on the phone with Erin who is obviously spilling the deets of the cafe encounter and now everyone will think Laurel is not only a teen mom, but also a homewrecker.

Overall I enjoyed this episode a lot more than the first. Annoying characters were cut down big time, and now major plot points for future story lines are starting to emerge. The pacing has gotten better as well, though I’m still not a huge fan of how many literal 5 second scenes this show still has, but definitely an improvement over episode 1. I love how Erin and Anika are the agents of chaos and just continue to cause problems for their own/my amusement. The Travis running away plot was pretty boring, but I guess it relates well to the parental issues the siblings are all dealing with.

The synopsis for next episode seems to be a continuation of the Laurel and Mark scandal so I’m looking forward to that and how far Anika and Erin can push ridiculous rumours. Also, why was this episode called “No Worries”? It seems like a lot of people were worried throughout it.

P.S. I just noticed a couple screenshots seem to be smaller, sorry about that, not sure what happened there.

Thanks again for continuing to follow the new direction of the blog, and I hope you guys will continue to read along as I tackle this questionable series. Until next time!